He said he was waiting for my reply.

How can I reply?

I really want to agree. I really want to go home with the person I love every day and say, "I had a hard day today."

I want to cook a messy dinner together during our break, and eat it with a smile and a frown.

I want someone to listen to me and say "I'm so tired" when I'm tired, and then I can lean on his shoulder and cry silently for a while.

But do I deserve that kind of life?

This morning when I was preparing breakfast, the buttered bread fell from my hand. I thought it was going to stain the carpet, but I quickly bent down and caught it.

This action is very beautiful, just like a martial arts master.

But when I looked up, the room was empty.

I really want to have someone looking at me there, and I can smile and ask him, "Am I awesome?"

He also laughed and teased me, saying that he had never seen such an agile lawyer.

Then we happily start this day, or every day in the future.

I really want to promise him.

But this way of me is selfish and unfair to him.

As I said, I am a person with many flaws. My miserable childhood made me stubborn and withdrawn. My troubled native family made me feel anxious and sad all day long. I cannot take these things into a relationship.

This isn't fair to my other half.

Xiaosun was born and raised in Chengdu. His parents were both literary and artistic workers. They were polite and polite. I only saw them once and I was deeply impressed. His family is very similar to mine. They both have children. Xiaosun has a younger sister.

Their parents are still willing to give birth to a daughter after giving birth to a son for the first time. This seems to me to be a fantasy.

Besides, I have also seen that girl. She has been doted on by her parents and brother since she was a child, and her self-confidence can't be suppressed, making her invincible.

But what am I?

I'm a monster.

"I can't agree." I said in a deep voice. When I said these words, I felt like I was cut by an invisible knife.

"Why?" Xiao Sun said anxiously, "Sister Zhang, am I being a little abrupt? If you need time to think about it, I can wait..."

"We are all adults. We don't act like children. We don't need time to think about this kind of thing." I shook my head, "If it doesn't work, it just won't work. I'm sorry."

Seeing Xiao Sun's disappointed expression, I felt like the invisible knife had passed through my body again.

It hurts.

"Okay... ok..." Xiao Sun nodded with a disappointed expression, "Sister Zhang, please don't apologize to me. It's me who should apologize. I'm really, really sorry..."

"No." I smiled and said to him, "It's a good thing to dare to express yourself. Xiao Sun, you are a very good person. I rejected you because of my own problems. I hope you won't be sad."

"Well..." Although Xiao Sun nodded, I could see from his eyes that he was extremely sad.

After attending Mengmeng's wedding, I gave her half a month's leave.

Although she wants to come back to work, the honeymoon is a once-in-a-lifetime event, and I would rather she take paid leave than use this precious time to focus on work.

A week passed quickly. Xiao Sun and I handled a commercial dispute case together, but this time due to insufficient evidence provided by both parties, the verdict was not pronounced, and a second court hearing will be held soon.

"Xiao Sun, please keep an eye on me for the next two days." I said, "I have to go home."

"Go home?" He raised his eyebrows, "Sister Zhang, you look very sad every time you get a call from home. Did something happen at home?"

"No, that's a good thing." I said with a smile, "My brother is getting married."

"Brother...?" Xiao Sun was obviously surprised, "Sister Zhang, do you have a younger brother?"

"yes."

"You are so calm. I have never heard you say that you have a younger brother."

"Just because I didn't mention it doesn't mean I haven't." I breathed a sigh of relief, "I haven't been home for many years. This time is the last time. I want to show up no matter what."

"The last time...?" Xiao Sun obviously didn't understand, "Is there one last time to meet your biological brother?"

"Yes." I was obviously a little happy, "Anyway, I'll be back soon, one day at the earliest and two days at the most. I'll leave everything to you in the past two days."

"Don't worry, Sister Zhang, it's no problem." Xiao Sun nodded, "But... don't you need me to take you off? You drive back?"

"I'm not driving." I said, "There's no need to be so public. I'll just go back by car."

"Okay, then you have to pay attention to your safety and send me a WeChat message when you arrive."

"No problem." I nodded and said to him, "If something happens at home, you can go and do it first. There shouldn't be any lawsuits recently except for the business dispute."

"My home is in Chengdu!" Xiao Sun said to me with a smile, "Don't worry, I will definitely stick to my post."

Looking at Xiao Sun's condition, I feel very happy.

He didn't alienate me because I rejected him.

As long as I can work with people I know well, I feel confident.

He will definitely find a better partner, but that person can never be me.

I bought a bus ticket, put on casual clothes and set off.

I can't let the villagers know how good my life is in Chengdu, otherwise they will become a bottomless pit hovering over my life and suck all the blood out of me.

The bus, ordinary clothes, and just the right amount of light makeup were all I needed for this trip.

I'm just an ordinary person. I don't have extra money to help them, and I don't have the ability to arrange jobs for any idle people in the city. I'm just me, an ordinary person.

The car left Chengdu and circled the mountain road for more than two hours before finally sending me to a place ten kilometers away from the village.

Next, you need to take a black bus and then transfer to Sanbengzi.

I set off in the afternoon and didn't enter the village until evening.

The village is indeed preparing for a wedding. The roads are filled with tables and the telephone poles are covered with red paper. The wedding will start tomorrow.

"Laidi?!" An aunt suddenly recognized me.

"Yes." I nodded and looked at her, "I'm back."

"Tsk..." She curled her lips slightly contemptuously, then forced out an ugly smile, "How many years have you been back? Is the city so nice?"

"Not good." I shook my head, "But Chengcai is getting married, and I am my sister, so I have to come back."

"Really?" She nodded with a smile, "Then you go home quickly."

I nodded to her, breathed a long sigh of relief and walked towards "home".

Since the first day of high school, I have never lived at home.

I lived on campus when I was in school and worked outside on weekends, winter and summer vacations. This place is very strange to me.

The atmosphere in the villagers also made me more stressed. They are like the best intelligence agents in the world. Every word you say at home will be spread throughout the village the next day.

Especially me.

A stubborn woman who is unwilling to earn tuition for her younger brother and insists on going to school by herself.

A slutty woman who fell in love with the "feasting lights" of the city and didn't want to go home to see her.

A miserable woman who is unmarried in her thirties and no one wants to take her in.

A stingy woman who doesn't care about her younger brother's marriage and doesn't pay a bride price or a down payment for a house.

A failed woman who has worked hard for more than ten years and still has not "returned home in fine clothes".

This is how I am in the eyes of the villagers. I am a famous joke in the village.
Chapter completed!