"So, you are still regretting your inability to deal with Sato's problem, but you are still unwilling to help Koharu, who may be facing the same situation as Sato. Is this what you mean?" However, senior Kogi-san didn't look like I expected him to.

With an understanding smile, her voice was not as soft as before, but showed a more silent feeling.

"I really want to help Xiaochun, but, senior, I'm afraid. In order to take the right path in high school, I have already denied the person I was before. What do you mean, let me go back to the original path?"

?"

"Kazuya, I thought I already understood you. Even now, I don't think there's much problem with my understanding of you." Senior Xiao Muxi looked at me quietly like that, but her words

The shocking power revealed in it was much more than what she saw on the surface, "But what I don't understand is that every time I understand your thoughts more and more, I find that I am less able to

I understand your thinking - or in other words, I understand that your behavior is the result of you taking a certain specific approach, but I cannot agree with your mode of thinking about the problem."

This is the first time that senior Xiaomu has said such words to me. In the past, she has always used her tolerance to understand me and support me. However, this time, when I seek help from Xiaomu Xuecai again,

When I asked for help, I found that she was not on my side.

"Kazuya, what do you think of me?" Suddenly, senior Kogisu brought up a topic that had no connection with before.

"A reliable senior who can understand me and help me at any time." I answered subconsciously.

"So, what do you think is the difference between me and Hayato Hayama of the football club, whom you often complain about?"

"There's nothing comparable about this question, right?" I lowered my head guiltily, because I already knew what Senior Xiaomu Zhu wanted to ask next.

"——Kazuya, I hope you can face up to some problems, okay?" The senior's gentle but undeniable voice stopped my vague words.

"Well, in comparison, the seniors are more low-key and know when enough is enough, and the seniors don't play the role of a typical team leader, right? There are still many differences - of course these are the differences I am talking about.

According to how senior behaves in front of me, in front of other people, senior is approachable but not easy to get close to, but that's not your true side, right?"

"Kazuya, you are talking about my attitude when facing other people, aren't you? Whether in front of you or in front of other people, you are talking about Kogi Yukina's attitude towards other people - but

, do you really think that my attitude when taking care of you is different from the attitude of Hayama Hayato, whom you dislike, when taking care of other people?"

"Different--"

"——It's also a help, don't think of me too noble, and don't think of other people too mean, isn't it? The same is true for your question, don't feel that you have accomplished nothing,

Don’t think that you can do everything by yourself, do you agree with what I say?”

I am speechless.

"So, Kazuya, do you understand what I mean?"

"I understand, Senior Xiaomu Yu."

Yes, of course I understand. I don’t need to be told by senior Xiaomu, Xiaochun already told me at that time. She told me not to care too much about my one mistake in judgment, and not to care too much about the consequences of my unintentional mistakes.

However, I can't ignore it. When the concept that I have always believed in "I will make judgments for everyone, and then others will implement it, and finally solve the problem" is buried by my own mistakes, I can't do it.

to ignore.

"Yes, it seems you still don't understand." Senior may be the person who best understands the meaning of my changes in expressions at different times. She should have understood what I said just by looking at my helpless eyes.

The hidden meaning behind the promise, "I don't expect this simple statement to make you understand."

"I'm sorry, Senior Xiaomu Yan, I have my own persistence, although this persistence seems ridiculous."

"Okay, next question," Senior Xiaomu Zhuo continued to say to me as if he didn't hear my reply, "You have been commenting on my attitude towards others before. So, have you ever considered that Xiaomu Xuecai will

No, what about other people’s expectations?”

So, what will senior Xiao Mu Zhu expect? In my impression, senior Xiao Mu Zhu will always be trustworthy and will never give up caring about me - this is also the impression senior Xiao Mu Zhu left on me.

However, Yukina Kogi is not a perfect superman. As perfect as Yukinoshita, there will be times of hesitation. Senior Kogi Yukina, who does not have Yukinoshita's arrogance and ability, must also have times of hesitation and hesitation, right?

Therefore, Xiao Mu Xuecai also has expectations, right? Looking forward to others' care, hope, and help from others. Is this what the senior wants to express to me?

"Or, let's change the question, Kazuya." Just like what he did before, senior Kogisuke approached me gently. I could almost feel the sound and breath of senior's breathing, but what was different from before was that she didn't

Without making any physical contact with me, "If I encountered a similar situation to Xiaochun, what do you think you would do?"

"As long as I can find a reason to convince myself, I will help my seniors and try my best to help!" I answered decisively.

"What's the difference from your current attitude in answering Xiaochun's question?" Senior Xiao Muyu showed a wry smile, "It's just a difference in confidence in helping! The premise remains the same, doesn't it? It makes me a little disappointed.

Ah, Kazuya."

"but--"

"——In front of me, you don't need to repeat your theory over and over again, right?" Senior Xiao Muyu stopped me from continuing to explain and asked, "By the way, if it's your sister,

What? Will there be a difference?"

"Well, senior, you know, family -"

"——Family exceptionalism! Well, as expected, you want me to reach the level of your family. Isn't it a bit reluctant?"

"Family relationships are always irrational and cannot be judged with the same logic." I nodded gently.

"But family relationships are also the most stable. This is also the reason why you can ignore your principles when facing your family, right?" Senior Xiaomu Yu showed an inexplicable and somewhat envious look.

"kindness."

"Ah, to be honest, Kazuya, I admire myself a little now. How could I know so many things about you? How many things have you told me?"

"Well, I said a lot of things without even realizing it..."

"Unknowingly!" The senior also showed a somewhat nostalgic expression, "Although we have known each other for a semester, we still exchanged many things!"

"Yes, I am also proud to know many things about senior Xiaomu Zhu."

"Actually, from this perspective, the two of us are relying on each other, right? We share our secrets with each other, and then support each other."

"Senior, if you are so understanding -"

"So, everyone is the same. Everyone is burdened with a lot of pressure that others don't know. Then, everyone hopes that someone can help them share these pressures. We found the person who shared the pressure, and it was still very difficult.

You're lucky!" Senior Xiaomu Yan continued, "But where is Xiaochun now?"

In the end, senior Xiao Muyu brought the topic back to Xiaochun's problem.

"Is Xiaochun like that? Even though that child looks very stubborn and serious, she can't handle these things at all, right? No matter how hard she tries, there is no way to deal with it. She can only wait for the nightmare.

The end of junior high school, and then trying to find a new beginning after entering high school. So, Kazuya, have you ever thought about what it means for Koharu to reveal those things to you? "

What does it mean? Of course I know. I understand that girl's stubbornness very well. If possible, how could she seek my help.

——But none of this is important. What is important is that what I lack now is not the motivation to help Xiaochun, but the support to help Xiaochun!

"Senior, I understand what you want to say. However, Senior has been trying to convince me by deepening my emotions. However, what I need now is a rational and logical 'right argument'!"

"That's right, Kazuya, when you find that your reason is completely opposite to your emotions, why would you rather believe in that set of 'logic' constructed by yourself than face your own heart and face it?

Think about your true feelings! Don’t you think your life is too tiring if you live purely by relying on rational analysis and judgment?”

Somewhat suddenly, senior Xiao Muzhu lost his composure in front of me. Before, senior had never complained. Even in the conversation just now, I could see that senior was trying hard to persuade me. However, somewhat suddenly, senior Xiao Muzhu

The senior is angry.

The feeling left behind by the senior's forehead leaning against mine has not completely dissipated. Now, I feel that senior Xiaomu Zhao, who has always been very close to me, is extremely far away from me.

I can understand what senior Xiaomu is thinking. She sees the shadow of herself in the current Xiaochun. Although I don’t know what misunderstood things happened to senior back then, but the situation she encountered with Xiaochun must be exhausting.

. So, seeing me, who can help Xiaochun, watching from the sidelines will make senior Xiaomu Yu feel helpless and angry.

However, seniors can "empathize" with Xiaochun's situation in a very emotional way, but I can't. Human emotions, whether they are anger, complacency, sympathy, or concern, all hinder the production of correct judgments.

, other people may not have this kind of self-consciousness, but I, who have failed once, cannot do without this kind of self-consciousness.

"I'm sorry, Kazuya, I got a little excited." However, just before I said nothing because of senior's anger, senior Kogisu calmed down first, "At first I just wanted to make a suggestion, but then

Somewhat unknowingly, I said some more serious words! Sure enough, it’s better that I shouldn’t comment on these things, right?”

Senior Xiaomu's voice sounded very calm and she explained what had just happened. Although, I don't know how hard she had to exercise self-restraint behind that calmness.

"It's okay. I understand. Senior, no matter who you are, sometimes you can't think rationally. I've also made mistakes, isn't it?"

"Kazuya, you still really like to use 'reason' to solve problems!"

However, I was a little surprised to see Senior Xiaomu Yan look at me with a rare pleading look.

I felt a little irritated when I looked at Senior Xiao Muzi like this.

"Of course, 'rationality' is the most important basis for distinguishing humans from animals!"

"So, is the interdependence I mentioned before also a type of rationality?"

I looked at the senior in surprise.

"Kazuya, don't you think that kind of feeling is an emotional appeal?"

"I don't know." To this, I can only answer with the most honest words.

"So, even you are not incapable of being purely rational! So, why you are obsessed with that 'positive theory', I really can't understand."

"Actually, I don't know. Maybe it's just a way for me to escape from the past?" I said with some self-deprecation, "But at least now, I can't give up that 'right argument'. Sorry, senior."

"If you really think so, then it will be easier to solve." The senior lowered his head and said something that I didn't quite understand with some emotion, "In short, from my point of view, Kazuya, I still

I hope you can help Xiaochun, but if you really can't do it, I can only say that I am sorry and sad, but I can't change anything."

"I also want to help her, Senior Xiaomu Yan," I said with a wry smile, "but if we are bewitched by our temporary emotions, then we will make many actions that we will regret."
To be continued...