Extra long leave request form for night use Part 2
Hello everyone, I am Du Dingbei, your loyal friend who updates every day.
Yesterday, a reader said in the comment area: The leave note literature is going to die. Woohoo.
The love is so sincere that I feel pity for him.
I think, as the leading figure in leave letter literature in the 22nd century, I must give him a shot in the arm.
It is indeed difficult to write a very long leave request, but how can a serious literary worker stop being afraid of difficulties?
My pride doesn't allow me to do this.
That’s why I got this super long leave request note.
Today is the last day of April. It’s a good time to review the current situation of "The Fist of Pulling the Hip" (the name becomes easier and easier to pronounce. I will communicate with the editor another day to see if the title can be changed). It can also be regarded as a short-term summary.
I had crotch lift for 4 days in total in April (it does not mean that I had to stretch my crotch for 5 days in May. There is no such connection. After all, I had crotch lift for 6 days in January and 7 days in March. This is obviously a random number sequence),
The number of crotch pulling days dropped by 75% compared to March.
There were 72,000 words effectively updated in April, an increase of 19.17% compared with March when the number was around 60,000 words.
In April, my weight was 83.1 kilograms, an increase of 3.87% from March, and the thickness of the swimming ring and the number of layers on the chin doubled.
In general, the development trend of serious literature is steady and good. Except for the weather suddenly getting hotter, Du Dingbei catching fish every day, and my cat starting to shed hair like a dandelion and learning to bite slippers, nothing can stop it.
I am gradually realizing my dream of perfecting my career.
Of course, a mature man will never make a clear promise, and I am not a financial blogger who sets up a WeChat group to collect IQ taxes. Predicting the future is not my specialty. Whether full attendance will be achieved in May, let’s keep it under wraps.
Drum.
I don’t know if I can get perfect attendance in May.
In my opinion, the future is like a game of five-game blackjack in an Internet cafe. You can never predict how much you and your friends will pull your crotch. The dreaming process is beautiful and hazy, like a ball of unlicked cotton.
Sugar, but the moment of pulling my crotch is clearer than the pain of stepping on the building blocks.
I believe more and more in my crotch pull and doubt my future more and more.
I have learned never to promise things that I am not sure of, such as going to bed early and getting up early and loving you forever.
But my classmate in the mecha operation department, Mr. Song Minghe, doesn’t think so.
Song Gong is a very serious and self-disciplined person, and he will definitely do whatever he decides.
He leveled the land in March and April and harvested the answers in August and September, taking one step at a time and never stretching his legs.
After we joined the Kendaji Literary Club together, the serious Mr. Song became interested in murdering me for pulling my crotch.
Over the years, Song Gong has eliminated almost all uncertainties in life, except for Mr. Tanaka Kensuke and me.
To this day, Mr. Tanaka Kensuke’s mother still has not entered the atmosphere, and I am still interrupting. Song Gong’s work of clearing up uncertainty is still going on.
He regularly practices the Duangen Wutou-style sword-drawing technique, regularly greets me, and regularly writes literature to remind me.
Seven years ago, when I serialized my first novel "My Roommate Really Has Problems" on Qidian.com, Song Gong provided tens of thousands of words about the work and told readers and friends the reasons why I stopped updating.
After "" was released, the battle between Song Gong and me also started again.
Different from the past, what Song Gong recorded this time was my reason for updating, titled "What You Don't Know About Du Gong·Change 2·The Reasons for Du Gong's Update".
The first article in this series is related to the work I have posted in "", but not many people seem to have seen it. Therefore, I took the opportunity of taking this leave to attach Song Gong's new work below, and also leave a message to Song Gong here.
.
Brother Song, Brother Song, besides urging you to update, why not also read my novels.
I still write very hard, but I still want to hear your opinion.
Thank you all for seeing this, see you tomorrow.
Attached:
What you don’t know about Du Gong · Gai Er · Reasons for Du Gong’s update 02
Fourth
Du Gong, as has been pointed out many times before, is one of the top ten rotten people in the mecha operating system. He is rotten to the bone and is incurable.
For example, the canteen of the Mecha Operations Department has a delicious roasted pork dish, especially its homemade hot sauce, which is famous throughout the department.
In order to get more free hot sauce, Du Gong actually ordered Su Gong, the network manager of May Day, to take the five-pound hot sauce bottle from the store together. He ignored the surprised look in the store owner's eyes when Su Gong took away the hot sauce bottle.
Du Gong was very eloquent about this: "The shopkeeper's surprised look was obviously because Su Gong was still wearing this short-sleeved shirt in November, and it had nothing to do with the hot sauce."
Of course, when Mr. Su returned the bottle, it was cleaner than it had been washed, as if it had never been filled with chili sauce before.
"The hot sauce has passed through the intestines, and it will stay on the updated paper." Du Gong, who is worse than the sauce, even though he repeatedly suffered from hemorrhoids due to his crazy eating of spicy food, he still went his own way. This sentence has never shown the convincing power it should have.
On this day, after Mr. Du once again ordered Mr. Su to bring the hot sauce bottle, I raised the knife as usual to remind him.
“Now that we have Chuanchang Chili Sauce, our lunch boxes have also been updated with ten thousand words.”
"It's okay, it's okay. After the barbecue is finished, we'll start..."
Seeing Du Gong rushing to the toilet with the firepower of a planetary engine, and then looking at the bright red chili sauce, I understood something.
"Duke Du, there is no paper in the toilet. You are sitting there waiting for death. If you don't change it, I will send the hot sauce bottle back to the store."
Du Gong had no choice but to change a chapter and exchanged toilet paper and hot sauce bottles.
Fifth
Du Gong regards himself as the leader of the mecha operating system fff. Whenever Ping Gong, Pancake Gong, Xing Gong and others are in pairs or having sex, Du Gong always appears in a special identity and spreads evil intentions around them.
This special character has a mysterious connection with Du Gong's oval face and small tuft of hair.
To put it bluntly, it is a light bulb.
Song Gong is a person who thinks about his roommates. Seeing that Duke Du came to disturb Gong Ping again, I couldn't stand it and said:
"Du Gong, where is today's update?"
"Song Gong, you are in vain to be the deputy leader of our fff regiment. At this time, Ping Gong did this outrageous behavior. It is precisely the occasion where I have to do my duty and act chivalrously and righteously. I will not hesitate to suspend the renewal of my righteousness for this. You don't understand.
Is this my good intentions?"
"Du Gong, whether the new update or the punishment from heaven is more serious, the world has its own public opinion, and it is not decided by you and me. As far as I am concerned, Wan Gong hangs around Mengmei, Mao Gong indulges in the next table, and Ping Gong is looking for flowers and willows.
, what’s wrong with getting to know beauties?”
"Song Gong, these remarks deeply hurt my heart. I have a book called "Encourage Disunion", you should study it carefully."
So, Duke Du continued to persuade Duke Li Ping in my room, and I went to Duke Du's office to re-read "The Theory of Encouragement". This exposition was eloquent and detailed, describing the emotional history of the mecha operating system.
"Emotions are fruitless, and they can fly separately if they are separated." I have to say that I still admire Du Gong who wrote this article. But at the end of the article, Du Gong took the trouble to write down the author's contact information, but he did not mention it at all.
Publishing the paper really confused me.
At this moment, a chat box popped up in the lower right corner of Du Gong's desktop.
"Senior Du, after reading your "Persuading Partitions", I was enlightened and immediately broke up with my boyfriend. Thank you for the contact information you left at the end of the paper. I hope to contact you frequently in the future." There are many similar chat records.
few.
I immediately took Du Gong back.
On this day, Du Gong had to update four chapters with a long knife on his neck. And, when I wasn't paying attention, he added "If you are a beautiful girl" to the introduction of "". He has still shied away and refused to delete it.
Lose.
Sixth
Du Gong often indulged in the Three Kingdoms Slaughter and delayed updates. When he entered the game, he had two magic weapons: talkativeness and vulgarity. He roamed the chat room in the name of "flat hacking", and everyone at the time hated him with gnashing of teeth.
On this day, I was raising my sword as usual to call for duty, and when I saw Du Gong in the killing field again, I couldn't help but shake my head secretly. However, Song Gong was also a good killer in the Three Kingdoms, and when he got interested, he stopped behind Du Gong to watch the battle.
As soon as I saw the word "red" in the chat box, I saw the Du Gong Bagua flash out; when I saw the word "middle", I saw someone judge the 3 of spades by lightning.
"Duke Du, you are like a divine help today, why not take advantage of the victory and withdraw your troops, quickly update with this good status, and still have extra time to continue killing."
"You don't know something, Mr. Song. Your luck is right at this time, so you can take advantage of the victory to pursue it and continue to increase your winning rate."
"Forget it, I'll just keep watching here. When you lose a game, it means that you have run out of energy today."
"Very good. If I win, I will continue. If I lose, I will start coding. Mr. Song, do you dare to bet?"
"Can I still be afraid of you, an old African chief? Just bet." After saying that, I moved a chair, sat down, and began to watch the battle.
There is a saying that Du Gong's card skills are really good at stretching the crotch, but the skill of this cannon is not to be underestimated. Seeing that he has hearts when he is happy, plum blossoms when he has soldiers, gossip imports, farming, wolf attacks, 2 blood, and Ling.
I got all three hits, and I felt more and more that something was not quite right.
"Du Gong, you are sure to win every battle this time and have great luck. Song is convinced and will not urge you to update today. It is already getting late and we are planning to hold a hot pot party. I have found two bottles of good wine. Do you think so?"
let's go?"
"Hooray, add wine to the hot pot, the more you eat, the better it will be!" As he said that, Duke Du organized Lu Gong and others to start preparations. I took this opportunity to open Du Gong's computer and found out the secret of his victory in every battle.
The next day, Pingchan's account was banned for a week because someone reported him for cheating, and the account owner had to update it that week.