Hello everyone, I am Du Dingbei, your loyal friend who updates every day.
This afternoon, my college roommate, Ah Chong, felt the boredom and impermanence of life and wanted to come and have a drink with me.
Ah Bing was a man with a strong body and a dangerous mind. Apart from practicing martial arts, he was always on the verge of breaking the law and committing crimes. I really didn't dare to refuse him, so I asked him to come to my house for a late-night snack.
Abing arrived at my house quickly, put on my slippers, sat on my sofa, and fucked my cat.
My cat was adopted from my senior friend together with Ah Chong. I have known him since he was a child, so I am not afraid and let him rua obediently.
So Abing used that artificial male whisper to talk to the cat, which sounded chilling.
It was Ah Bing who first let me know that some men have three accents, one for talking to men, one for talking to women, and one for talking to cats.
One is more terrifying than the other.
He rubbed the cat a few times, looked left and right at the sensitive area, and then asked me:
"Has Zhou Zhou been castrated?"
After getting the affirmative answer, Ah Chong laughed happily:
"Zhouzhou, you were castrated, it's great!"
Although Zhou Zhou didn't understand what A Bing was talking about, he felt his madness and scratched him before running away.
After the cat ran away, I had nothing in common with a rotten guy like A-cake, so I drank with him while writing this leave note.
The cake maker saw that I had been typing on my mobile phone, so he picked up a chopstick and said in confusion:
"Adu, what are you writing?"
"written request for leave."
"Why did you write a note asking for leave?"
"I didn't update today. If I didn't update, of course I would have to write a leave request."
Ah Chong was even more confused:
"Then why don't you update?"
Why not update?
There are many reasons, but there is no need to list them all now.
So I sighed and said:
"I usually write at night. I have to drink with you tonight, so I can't update it."
Ah Bing pretended to be surprised: "Then I am hindering you."
"It's okay. You don't have to feel too guilty. I will put all the responsibility on you in the leave request."
"no!"
The cake man slapped his chopsticks and said seriously:
"The thing I hate the most is being responsible!
You can ruin my reputation, but you can't hold me responsible.
How long have you written in your leave request?"
"About six hundred words, just in the middle."
"You start and I'll write the rest!"
I was overwhelmed by the awe-inspiring aura of the cake master, so I handed the phone to him. Here is what the cake master wrote:
Hello everyone, I am Ah Bing, a man who never goes beyond the pale and is so innocent that even a rotten guy like Du Er only dares to slander me for hanging on the edge of crime.
The above 600 words are purely frame-up. This bastard Du Er was watching TV series and playing games when he got up. When I sent him a message, he was watching TV series and playing games. When I arrived at his house, he was still watching TV series and playing games.
He was watching "The Witful Life of a Doctor" and was playing the Hearthstone Tavern Battle Flag. I could clearly see it from the side, and he still wanted to pass the responsibility to me. It was totally shameless, despicable and despicable.
Let’s talk about the cat issue again.
I haven’t seen this cat Zhou Zhou for half a year. When he saw me, he lay on the ground with his chest exposed and meowed lazily. It was obvious that he was not a serious cat. This was all because Du Er had not raised him well.
I am a manly man, a shameless and upright martial arts practitioner, and no cat can pretend to be in front of me. Of course, I have to rub it twice and teach it some basic civility and manners.
Moreover, isn’t it a good thing to be castrated? I don’t know how much trouble there will be less after castration. Many men in this world cannot become saints just because they have not been castrated. Shouldn’t they be happy to be castrated?
If the cat doesn’t understand, why don’t I understand?
The cat didn't say anything, but Du Er, a rotten man, talks too much. It's none of the cat's business if a dog catches a mouse!
Now that I have said all that I have to say, everyone must know who is responsible for not updating today.
I continued to drink, and I also collected "Fist of Utopia". I look forward to seeing everyone's criticism of this shameless person Du Er in the comments!