"Xia Fanxing, some of the changes that occurred during the consultation process may seem illogical at first glance, beyond your cognitive scope, and make you feel scared. However, the more they help you deepen your self-concept, the more likely it is to cause intense tension.
resistance, because many people are trying their best to protect their 'self'. They regard 'self' as 'I', and are afraid of being hurt, afraid of being criticized, and afraid of being exposed to things that 'self' doesn't know."
This day is Wednesday morning.
Xia Fanxing came to Teacher Ning's office with questions and expectations in her head, but she was quickly angered by some of Teacher Ning's views.
"Why?" Xia Fanxing didn't understand.
"Because these concepts can easily break our inner balance, but they are also most likely to lead you to deep transformation, and the process of self-growth itself is painful. I think you have also felt this in recent consultations.
We’re here, aren’t we?”
Xia Fanxing felt himself wrapped in irritability.
Ning Youguang felt his restlessness and said patiently: "The way we see ourselves is not always what we like. If you want to make your true self become what you like, this process must be done."
Experiencing changes in psychology, behavior, consciousness and cognition, each step requires hard work on your part. The premise is that you must have the courage and determination to change. So, Xia Fanxing, you have to understand, what if
If you want to change, you can't just do it by consulting and communicating with me on a few cases. The most important thing is that you have to know what you are doing and have a very clear understanding of what you are doing and what you will do.
What consequences need to be borne? What I can tell you is that this is not a short-term process, nor is it an easy task."
"This incident also leads to profound understanding." Xia Fanxing looked calm.
"Yes." Ning Youguang smiled, "I'm glad you can understand. That's why we work together towards the same goal. Once achieved, you will be reborn."
For a long time, they sat facing each other in silence as they had done countless times before.
it is more than words.
Ning Youguang's office was so quiet that you could hear a pin drop.
Xia Fanxing took several deep breaths, and then was awakened by the unknown sound of birds outside the window.
He slowly opened his eyes and said, "Can we continue?"
Ning Youguang said: "You have made a decision, right?"
Xia Fanxing looked at Ning Youguang and said firmly: "Yes, Teacher Ning, I have made a good decision. I hope that with your help, I can become the person I want."
After thinking for a while, he added, "Please have mercy on Teacher Ning. Sometimes I may not have the strength to accept many changes and new knowledge that are earth-shaking to me. Therefore, in this process, I still
Please give me patience and help, and don't give up on me, okay?"
He took a deep breath and said, "I also promise you that no matter how painful it is, my desire to change is unwavering."
Ning Youguang's clear eyes were filled with understanding: "I know, I know, I have been through this before, and I can understand your feelings very well. Isn't there a saying that without pain, there is no gain?
?”
Xia Fanxing leaned back on the chair and relaxed a little, "I'm really tired of hearing this."
Ning Youguang said seriously: "Confusion is the first stage in the learning process. This also shows that the limitations of your inherent knowledge have been broken. You will face many new cognitions, which will continue to impact your past thinking and thinking.
Due to your original cognition, you will definitely have anxiety and confusion, but these are also your help, which will give you stronger motivation to change and unlock your creativity."
Xia Fanxing sighed deeply: "How could I have thought so much? I just don't want to continue to be silent. I want to become happier."
Ning Youguang smiled: "When you become yourself, how can you be unhappy?"
…
At the end of the consultation.
Ning Youguang and Xia Fanxing said: "I will go back to my hometown next, and we will reschedule the next consultation."
Xia Fanxing stood up slowly: "Okay, let's contact you via WeChat."
Ning Youguang sent him out: "You have to take good care of yourself at home."
Xia Fanxing turned around and said, "I got it."
In the midday sun, a smile flashed across his fair face.
…
After returning home, Xia Fanxing began to notice changes in herself.
He felt that he had a little more strength deep in his heart, and he began to use a rational attitude to think about what happened to him, as well as the thoughts that made him feel scared and uneasy.
When he really started to rethink these problems, he found that these problems were not as scary as he imagined.
From this, he began to learn to look at himself and the people, things and things around him from a more correct perspective.
…
This morning, when he woke up, he suddenly no longer wanted to stay at home.
He put on his sportswear, opened the door, and walked along the road in the community, admiring the lush green trees and colorful flowers in bloom.
He walked slowly and watched quietly, suddenly feeling that he could actually go to a restaurant outside to have breakfast.
He hasn't eaten out for a long time.
…
There is a restaurant for morning tea outside the community. In the past, when his parents were around, he would often go there with them.
Standing at the door of the restaurant again, he found that the restaurant didn't seem to have changed much after such a long time.
He became hesitant.
He thought: "If the decoration inside has not changed and is still as old-fashioned as before, won't I feel depressed again when I go in?"
But, he really missed the swan cakes and crab roe siomai inside.
Finally, he plucked up the courage and walked in.
As soon as he entered, he realized that his worries were all unnecessary.
The outside of the restaurant has not changed, but the inside has changed.
The furnishings inside, including dining tables, dining chairs and lighting decorations, have all been changed. The style of the entire hotel has become more modern, with fresher and brighter colors, more in line with the aesthetics and preferences of young people.
He liked it at first sight.
After he chose a seat and sat down.
A middle-aged woman wearing a black suit with a gentle and capable appearance walked up to him in surprise with a menu: "Young Master Xia, it's really you."
Xia Fanxing raised his head and smiled politely: "Hello, Manager Yu."
This restaurant is located at the entrance of Xia Fanxing Community, and Manager Yu has worked here for many years.
She knew basically everyone in the community who had eaten here, and she was also familiar with Xia Fanxing's family.
"It's so nice to see you." She said with joy in her eyes, "What would you like to eat? We have added a lot of new dishes now, do you want to try them?"
Xia Fanxing flipped through the menu, "Are the swan crisps and crab roe siomai still the same as before?"
Manager Yu's hand holding the pen paused, "I'm sorry, Mr. Xia, the master who made the dim sum before has left. Now the one who makes these dim sum is a new master. However, the taste is not bad. Mr. Xia, do you want to try it?
"
Xia Fanxing frowned slightly: "Okay, order it."
The hesitant tone was full of a compromise that he didn't want but had to make.
Manager Yu smiled and said: "Mr. Xia, the dim sum made by the new chef tastes really good. You will know when you try it later."
Xia Fanxing picked up a cup of cooked Pu and took a slow sip.
He thought of his previous agreement with Teacher Ning.
Since I have decided to change, why can't I accept the dim sum made by a new chef?
He has never tasted it, so why should he refuse and be troubled because these snacks are not made by a master chef?
Isn’t this all because you are wandering in your own self-righteousness and fettering your own heart?
With this thought in mind, he pushed open the menu and said, "What other things do your customers like to order here? Give me seven or eight of them."
Manager Yu smiled brightly and said hello repeatedly.
…
When the snacks were served, Xia Fanxing found that the snacks tasted really good, and some were even better than before.
What a surprise.
He finally experienced what Teacher Ning said: "Once you start to accept the world, you will find many surprises that you have never seen before."
He picked up another swan pastry and chewed it carefully, letting the sweet fragrance slowly penetrate his senses. He was suddenly touched that there were actually many beautiful things in the world.
The snacks that Manager Yu ordered for him were very delicious, and he quickly relaxed as he ate them.
Until, an incredible voice came from my ears: "Xia Fanxing?!"
He turned around and saw that it was his former good friends Li Xing and Wu Hao.
"You guys are here for breakfast too. How are you doing?" he put down his chopsticks and asked.
Li Xing and Wu Hao were obviously very happy to see him.
"You seem to be in good condition now." Li Xing took the first step and sat down opposite Xia Fanxing, looking at him and smiling. He was a fat young man with fair skin and wearing a fashionable brand.
"Better than before." Xia Fanxing.
"We were really worried about us before." Wu Hao sat down on the other side, "Your uncle came to us before and asked us to go to your house to accompany you. When we went to your house, we found that your doors were locked.
.”
"Yes, I wasn't feeling well before, but I've been seeing a psychiatrist recently and my condition has improved a lot." After saying that, he asked them, "Do you want to eat some?"
Li Xing and Wu Hao smiled and nodded.
Xia Fanxing called Manager Yu again and asked her to serve more snacks and vegetables.
The three old friends were eating and drinking together, which instantly made Xia Fanxing feel like he was back to the time they used to play together.
But soon, when Li Xing and Wu Hao started talking about the winery project they were working on recently, Xia Fanxing began to feel a little frustrated.
Seeing that he fell silent, Li Xing and Wu Hao quickly ended what they were talking about, changed the subject, and talked about something lighter.
Xia Fanxing finally felt involved, and after a while, Xia Fanxing said she wanted to go home.
Li Xing and Wu Hao said they would send him home, but Xia Fanxing refused, "I want to go shopping around."
Li Xing smiled and said, "Okay, the weather is nice today. It's good to go out and walk around."
Li Hao said: "Then let's make an appointment next time." 1314