Chapter 91 In my life, Im always a little bit close
Seeing Changsheng crying continuously, Xuejin felt a little uncomfortable, but there was no hesitation in his movements with the long knife.
After thinking for a while, Xue Jin spoke warmly.
"Ah Chou, you should know that when a person really wants to die, no one in this world can stop him. There is no cover for the river, there are no quilts on the wall, and there are no scissors that are not sharp. I have done so many things before.
I didn't die even if I tried, just because mortal swords can't kill a monk. But now, I have decided to die, do you want to see me try various ways to die every day?"
"No, I don't want to!"
Chang Sheng didn't want to watch Xue Jin commit suicide. Even if he wouldn't die, it would still hurt. She didn't want Xue Jin to die, and she didn't want Xue Jin to feel pain.
However, Xue Jin had not promised well before, so why was he suddenly so determined to die now? What happened?
Xue Jin looked at Chang Sheng with an unprecedented gentle expression. His eyes were sad, but he also had a smile that showed relief.
"Ah Chou, you should be happy for me. I can finally be freed. I'm sorry, I lied to you before. It's true that I want to live a good life with you, but at this moment, my desire to leave is also true."
"You have to know that being able to leave this world is a gift to me. Maybe more than ten or twenty years later, I can survive and appear in front of you in another appearance. When that time comes, we
Let’s continue to be friends. Don’t worry, when that time comes, I will never speak to you as loudly as I do now, nor will I yell at you.”
"Until then, can we be friends again?"
Chang Sheng trembled her lips. She didn't want to say yes at all, but looking at Xue Jin with sad eyes across from her, she couldn't refuse. She just didn't want to admit it.
"But when that time comes, the person I see is not you now. The person I know and want to live with is not the Seoljin of that time, but you now."
Changsheng looked at Xuejin opposite and couldn't help but speak.
Yes, the friend she wants to take care of is just Seoljin now. Even if he has a bad temper, even if he loses his temper from time to time, it is still the complete Seoljin. It is all Seoljin's doing.
thing. The one she wanted to get along with had always been Seoljin.
Xuejin's eyes were also red. He looked at Chang Sheng with great reluctance. He knew the child's loneliness, and also knew that the child had always been afraid of being alone. His presence might be a comfort to the child and could make her
The comfort of living well.
But, I'm sorry, A Chou, I really can't hold on anymore.
"I'm not as strong as you. I'm a coward. I don't dare to look at the past, or look at the disappointed eyes of my old friends. I even think about how low my image in the eyes of my old friends has become.
I can't stand it. I'm so cowardly..."
"I'm also very selfish. I don't even dare to tell you my plan openly. I just want the river to take my body away. I don't even want to think about what your expression will be like when you can't see me tomorrow morning.
.I’m not a good person.”
"I'm really sorry, Changsheng, but just let me go."
"However, we are obviously only a little bit away. Just a little bit away, and everyone can live a good life..."
Xue Jin's nose was so sore that he almost cried without the ability.
When he was young, he was only a little bit away from being discovered by the orthodox sect for his special physique and becoming a monk. Now, he was just a little away from being able to let go of the past and start a new life.
"I've always been a little bit close in my life. Maybe, this is my life..."
Changsheng is too young. Although she is more mature, it is all a trick of fate. At this time, she really doesn't know what to do when she begs her only friend. But the only thing she can be sure of is that Xue Jin
unhappy.
If he was forced to live, Xuejin would be unhappy for the rest of his life. She didn't know what to do, but after hesitating for a long time, she saw Xuejin's begging face, and her heart suddenly trembled.
She has always known how arrogant Xue Jin is, but such arrogant Xue Jin looks at her like this with pleading eyes. Does Xue Jin need to beg others? He just doesn't want to make himself sad. He wants to get his own approval.
Because, they are friends.
Being understood by others is probably what Xue Jin has always pursued.
Staring at Xue Jin opposite, Chang Sheng clenched her teeth and seemed to be able to feel the bloody smell coming from her mouth. The bloody smell rushed to her forehead and almost made her vomit.
But Changsheng still endured it. On the cold and windy night, Changsheng finally understood that others may not agree with the things you think are good. You can advise your friends, but you cannot force others to change their will. In fact, sometimes, you just need to say
Just "Okay" is enough.
Even though, that's hard.
It was so difficult that Changsheng felt that the flesh in her mouth was about to be chewed to pieces. She had never found it so difficult to say a word. It was like a stone weighing a thousand kilograms, pressing the base of her tongue, making her unable to even breathe.
difficulty.
But she finally said it. Changsheng's ears buzzed as she heard her words that were particularly calm and steady.
"good."
She said yes. The moment the word came out of her mouth, Chang Sheng wished she was mute, and wanted to swallow the word back regardless of her face. It seemed that as long as she did this, her only friend would not die. But she had already said
Exported.
The words spoken were like water thrown out, which could not be taken back. Chang Sheng closed his eyes in pain, but tears came out of his trembling eyelids and flowed down impatiently.
However, Xuejin rarely took the time to look at the gurgling river water under his feet and the three or five scattered river lanterns above the river water.
"Originally, I wanted my body to float away with the waves, but now that you are here, please fulfill my last wish. A Chou, when I die, you will burn me. I can no longer change what I was like in life, but after death
Finally, I want to die cleanly and leave no trace in this world. After my death, you can scatter my ashes in the river or let them drift in the wind. In short, don’t bury me underground.
.To be embarrassed, I am actually a little afraid of the dark."
Xue Jin rarely said a joke, but Chang Sheng couldn't laugh at all. She looked straight at him and her eyelids trembled. She didn't want to see the death of her only friend no matter what.
Looking at A Chou, Xue Jin took a breath. He had been on the battlefield and killed enemies, and knew where to kill him in the shortest time. But Chang Sheng was still watching here, and he didn't want Chang Sheng to see him.
He looked like he was bleeding everywhere. After all, this kid still had to collect his body. So Xuejin adjusted the position of the long knife, aimed it at his heart, and hit it hard!
When the long knife was about to pierce his heart, Xue Jin heard the long knife's whine and its unwilling trembling in a trance. Of course, the most piercing thing was Chang Sheng's exclamation.