Every summer in Guanzhong, it will be as hot as a steamer!
The scorching sun baked the earth, and the air seemed to be rolling. Even the originally green willow trees by the river were turned dark green by the sun. Only the singing cicadas attached to the branches were still working tirelessly.
With noise.
"Xiaodong, don't just play around. Keep an eye on An An. If you throw her, huh..."
Under the tree, Xiao Han, who was wearing big pants, a short T-shirt, and just sunglasses, was lying on a bamboo lounge chair, taking a leisurely sip of herbal tea, and then faced the cicada not far away with a long pole.
Xiaodong shouted.
"Got it!" Xiaodong shouted from a distance, and without looking back, he took the pole and pushed it upward hard!
Next, he heard a scream of "squeak..." and above his head, a cicada fluttered its wings, flew up from the tree in panic, peed, and then quickly flew away into the distance.
"Bah, bah, bah!" The idiot was raising his head and opening his mouth. He looked at Xiaodong Nianzhi nervously. The urine was not wasted. Half of it went into his mouth. The disgusted idiot kept sticking out his tongue.
"Idiot! Let it fly again! Poke its wings. Why do you keep poking its butt!"
"Nonsense! I just poked the wings. It was obviously because of your gluten that it didn't stick, so it ran away!"
"Go away! I used a pound of flour to wash out so much gluten, but it still doesn't stick. If your hands stink, who's to blame?"
"My hands smell? I...come on, come on, you can do it!"
"I'll come, I'll come! Come over here and take care of the child..."
Xiaodong and Lengzi blamed each other in a vindictive manner, but little An'an held up a cicada with broken wings and smiled happily: "It's raining, giggle..."
"Ahem, that's urine..."
————
The noise in the distance kept coming.
Under the willow tree, lying on another bamboo chair, Yan Zhitui's eyelids trembled, and he slowly opened his eyes, with a slight smile on his lips.
"Boy, you said you were going to treat me to fried cicadas tonight, but instead of catching them, you sent these two fools to catch them. I wonder if they can make enough for a plate by the end of the night?"
"Hey, Master Yan, don't worry. If these two idiots can't catch them, then I'll just go to the store and buy them! Those idiots have a lot of these things in their hands. When the time comes, it's only a penny each, and you can use them as food every day.
It’s enough to eat!” Xiao Han closed his eyes slightly and said weakly.
He also didn't expect that something he just said casually could make Yan Zhitui, who was Wenzong, so impatient to try it.
You know, people in Guanzhong have never had the habit of eating cicadas, let alone grasshoppers, and even shy away from such delicacies as scorpions!
This once made Xiao Han feel very regretful: Such a good thing should not be eaten until it can be maintained by artificial breeding? Why can they be allowed to breed unscrupulously in the wild? Even sitting at home with a light on at night, they can do it by themselves.
Bumping through the door?
"Buy it if you can't catch it? You, you know how to be lazy and take advantage of it. This is not good." Yan Zhitui waited for Xiao Han to finish speaking, smashed his mouth, and laughed and scolded Xiao Han.
Xiao Han rolled his eyes and continued to find a comfortable position to lie down: "Master Yan, what you said is wrong. We need to know that laziness is the driving force for our progress!"
"Huh? What do you mean by this?" Yan Zhitui was intrigued by Xiao Han's words and stood up from the bamboo chair and asked.
"Hey, Master Yan, hasn't he discovered that every tool we use now is made for the sake of being clever and lazy?" Xiao Han grinned and said with a rather proud smile: "Just
For example, in ancient times, the ancestors' slash-and-burn farming was too hard. Later, someone invented the plow, which greatly reduced the hard work of farming! This is a kind of laziness.
For example, now, the boy felt that blacksmithing was too tiring, so he installed a water hammer in the workshop and let the river water do the blacksmithing for people. This is also laziness!
Others are too lazy to walk, invented the carriage, too lazy to write, invented printing, and so on! So, lazy people are the ones who change the world."
Xiao Han explained his lazy behavior in a high-sounding way, but he didn't expect that Yan Zhitui just snorted: "Strong words! The use of tools was discovered little by little by our ancestors with their wisdom and hard work. Isn't it just like what you said?"
I had to be lazy and sleep, and then I figured it out as soon as I hit my head."
"You don't believe it?" Xiao Han's face was a little confused after being refuted by the old man, and he also sat up: "There is another point, which can better show people's ability to take advantage of others and be lazy."
"Oh? Which point?" Yan Zhitui raised his eyebrows and asked with a half-smile.
Xiao Han gritted his teeth and spit out two words: "War!"
"War?" Yan Zhitui was surprised.
"Yes!" Xiao Han nodded: "In the beginning, when we fought, we used sticks and stones, right? In this battle, we couldn't kill the opponent for a long time, and we were very tired! Later, someone discovered that the bronze sword had been chopped up
The man was very nice, and each sword was much faster than a wooden stick, so we all used bronze swords instead!
It's a pity that although the bronze sword is good, it is too clumsy, easy to break, and cannot kill many people! In order to save labor, we also discovered iron swords and long bows!
Just like this, I kept searching all the way, and now, trebuchets, crossbows, siege engines, and ladders have all appeared! But Master Yan, you see, all of this, in the final analysis, is how to kill people quickly, and then return quickly.
Home, isn’t it?”
Hearing Xiao Han's final question to himself, Yan Zhitui squinted his eyes slightly, neither nodding nor shaking his head, just looking at Xiao Han steadily, until he felt uncomfortable all over, as if there was a light on his back, and then he suddenly smiled
Got up.
"According to you, war is to kill the enemy quickly. We will use whatever weapons are good! Therefore, your firearms are not evil. They are just like iron swords and spears, which are naturally derived by people in order to be lazy.
What came out?”
Yan Zhitui's eyes were clear, as if he could see through Xiao Han's thoughts, so he could only bite the bullet and said: "That is indeed the case, and to be honest with the old man, the boy made those firearms not to start a war, but to start a war.
Stop the war!"
"Weapons were invented to stop war? This is quite new!" Yan Zhitui exclaimed, not angry at Xiao Han's fantasy words, but showing an expression of willingness to hear the details.
Xiao Han coughed twice and said: "Ahem, the old man may not believe it, but this is the fact! Just talking about this battle on the grassland, Master Yan thinks that if we attack aggressively like before! How many troops will we need to sacrifice?"
Yan Zhitui frowned slightly and thought for a moment before saying: "I know very little about the art of war, but according to a few years ago, the Turks could march straight into Chang'an City and come down to see! Even if we can win this time, it will be a miserable victory.
Maybe, like Yang Guang, he will end up with a country broken and people unable to live."
