Su Yao sat blankly in the living room, not looking for You Ye.
Xia Xianyue lay softly beside her, like a sleeping beauty. But unlike fairy tales, she would not wake up even if she was kissed.
Xia Liang really knew her situation and didn't say anything. He probably came here after hanging up the phone.
So what should you do?
Looking for Youye?
But even if he looked for it, he couldn't be saved. Because You Ye said that consciousness was not within the scope of her treatment.
At this time, a strange feeling of disgust appeared.
Why lie to yourself? Even if it’s to cheer yourself up.
But wouldn't this make it harder to return to the point before her death?
I know I shouldn't feel this way.
I also know that you should not treat Youye as a tool. If you do well, you will be applauded. If you do poorly, you will be disgusted regardless of the motivation.
I didn't even think so.
It was just sudden chaos. Because everything was broken.
“···”
Su Yao stubbed out the cigarette butt, not wanting to be in this small space again.
Just breathing, what is living?
If a person cannot open her eyes, cannot take care of herself, and cannot convey any will that belongs to her, then what kind of life is that?
There are no traces of having time to tidy up the house. That doesn't matter.
What anyone thinks or says is everyone else's business.
The only possibility that you can truly grasp lies in your own hands.
There is nothing to be afraid of.
So, Su Yao took the utility knife and flashlight and went out.
try to find.
Look at the entry.
Go to any place where a good night can appear.
No need to yell, just look for it.
"Buzz-"
It was okay if I had a phone, so I just threw it away.
This world is an abandoned world line.
"Didi——"
"Crazy?!"
While crossing the road, I was almost hit by a car.
The driver was cursing.
It doesn't matter.
No, you can't be hit by such a half-speed car, otherwise you will die. You have to hold the knife in your hand tighter.
Not found.
It doesn't matter.
Just on the street, beside the road, under the lightly raining sky, standing at the intersection waiting for the light to turn green.
It doesn't matter.
When everything in this world has nothing to do with you, all you need to consider is how to die faster and how to avoid being revived.
"Hey! You, what are you doing?!"
"That's a knife, right?"
"babble--"
“···”
Someone behind him made a confused sound.
It doesn't matter at all.
Su Yao just looked around for Youye, but couldn't find him. That was of course, because Youye didn't seem to want to see him now.
Maybe she can be lured out by self-mutilation, which doesn't mean she will die immediately, but will look miserable.
After all, the favorability score is a ridiculous 100, which is a perfect score!
"Puff——"
Perhaps there is no one in the world who regards suicide as an incomparable need for efficiency and therefore creates a unique aesthetic.
Where is such a person?
"Puff——"
While desperately stabbing the extended utility knife into the heart.
Accurate.
He staggered and continued walking forward, with every step he took there would be a pool of blood.
"Ahh——"
"Blood, that man is committing suicide..."
“···”
I heard someone scared and screaming.
It's raining.
The drizzle was really cold, so cold that I started to feel cold all over.
So stiff that I couldn't move.
There is no way to stab the knife into the heart simply and happily.
My ears are ringing.
But there's nothing to be afraid of.
If there's nothing to lose in the first place, then what's there to be afraid of?
"Bang--"
【You are dead】
【Node:20150322.23.56】
I don’t have the mood to find You Ye, but I won’t give up looking and looking for her.
Because I know that I am just an ordinary person. I may even be worse than an ordinary person if I lose my file.
You must rely on You Ye.
But he also knew that even Youye couldn't say anything to the most mysterious consciousness of mankind.
It was not near death, nor was it death.
That is real death.
If You Ye can repair the body of a dead person, then that person will live as if nothing happened.
It's too bizarre.
Does that mean that one can even dig up one's own mother from the grave, use the ashes to form a new person, and then wake up?
Just think about it with your brain.
What You Ye said is just equivalent to recreating a life. It has nothing to do with Xia Xianyue. Even if it is the same body, it is definitely not the same person.
【You are dead】
【Node:20150322.23.56】
···
【You are dead】
【Node:20150322.23.56】
I can't remember how many times I died.
Or maybe even Su Yao himself was numb.
It's just that I gradually understood a simple truth: Xia Xianyue is really fake.
If she could be repaired and resurrected even after she died, would Yu Ye just leave her body alone?
I must have tried it after my own death, and then let’s see...
My consciousness has returned here. What does this mean?
Maybe it's a disgusting narcissism, but good feelings are like that. Youye will definitely try to do something to his own body. But it will not work.
It was like confirmation, knowing the fact that Xia Xianyue was indeed dead.
The only breathing left, even though it was organized by her lungs but probably had nothing to do with her, was, as Yu Ye said, a worthless existence.
【You are dead】
【Node:20150322.23.56】
···
【You are dead】
【Node:20150322.23.56】
Still trying.
Does changing the method of death mean that the bug can be solved?
Is it possible to achieve more than a thousand times?
to be honest.
I really don’t know how many times I died and in what way.
Sometimes he died slowly, and sometimes he made a mistake and was even forcibly carried to the hospital. Fortunately, he kept holding the utility knife tightly, but he always died before he could reach the hospital.
But Yu Ye never showed up.
It was as if he had forgotten himself and really disappeared.
This left Su Yao with a fantasy, a very small possibility, and he was even unwilling to die because of this extremely small possibility.
Because death makes me sick, death makes me numb.
A meaningless death, like a headless fly. Tired.
I realized that my feelings for Xia Xianyue might not be that deep.
Realizing that there seems to be nothing unacceptable.
Realize that maybe there is a possibility, because she is still breathing. Even if that breath is not her breathing, that heartbeat is not her heartbeat.
Maybe Youye never came back after I died, because she no longer wanted to see me, so she never came to save me.
Therefore, what was said before about Xia Xianyue's body being alive and her consciousness definitely not coming back is false. Because she has never been rescued.
【You are dead】
【Node:20150322.23.56】
···
【You are dead】
【Node:20150322.23.56】
Then, it finally stopped.
When the drizzle continued, I finally put down the utility knife and soaked in the rain.
Under the surprised gazes of passers-by waiting for the light to turn green, I went home.
When I got home, the door was wide open.
The house was still a mess, and instead of the filth and smell that made people dream, there was the smell of moist soil and other people's footprints.
Xia Xianyue disappeared.
was taken away.
There were countless calls on my cell phone.
"Buzz-"
"Where are you?"
"Home."
"...Come to the hospital."
Very short conversation.
Su Yao didn't answer, just hung up the phone and didn't go directly to the hospital.
Went to get a mop.
Went to get a broom.
Went to get a rag.
Went and got everything we could to make this place clean.
Make this place clean, and then have no intention of making yourself equally clean.
Just like that, at 0:59 on the 22nd, I went to the hospital where she was.