Zhuo Xi was in pain. The heart he had just let go was lifted again. Lin Ping was right. Yin Haoze and Lin Anxin could not be unrelated. He could do anything for Lin Anxin at any time, and was even willing to give up 10% of the money for Lin Anxin.
The shares were given to Lin Ping, who had no relationship with him.
However, what made Zhuo Xi even more distressed was Lin Anxin's attitude. She forced herself to send herself to work with a smile, and then turned around to find Yin Haoze. It turned out that the reason why she didn't care whether she accompanied him was because she could always ask Yin Haoze as a backup.
Lin Anxin clearly felt something strange about Zhuo Xi. Although he tried hard to endure it, he still couldn't hide his loneliness.
Lin Anxin walked behind him and hugged Zhuo Xi gently: "Zhuo Xi, did you hear something?"
Zhuo Xi was stunned. Lin Anxin was leaning against him like this. It was the tranquility he longed for. It would be great if time could stay at this moment.
"An Xin, do you blame me for not accompanying you to find Lin Ping today?"
"How could it be? I knew you were in a hurry, and we didn't know where Lin Ping would go at that time." Lin Anxin comforted him and said.
"But Lin Ping is blaming me..." Zhuo Xi couldn't help but say.
Lin Anxin felt chilled, he had indeed heard everything.
"Lin Ping is still a child. Some of his words are thoughtless and too extreme. Don't take them to heart."
"Actually, some of what he said was right."
"What?"
"For example, Yin Haoze still loves you, and he is still willing to do anything for you. And subconsciously, you are also dependent on him, otherwise you wouldn't have called him and asked him to accompany you right after I left. Wouldn't you?
?" Zhuo Xi slowly let go of Lin Anxin's hand holding him, turned around and looked at her and said softly.
There was a faint chill under his warm eyes, and his black and white eyes looked like a wounded boy, just like how he looked at himself under the locust tree in school that year.
"Zhuoxi, how do you want me to prove it? I admit that I was very scared at the time. I contacted Haoze because I had never been to Kang Jieming's house and didn't know the specific location of his house. Of course... I don't want to lie to you. I also
I want to find someone to embolden me...but that doesn’t mean anything.”
"Really? It means that subconsciously you still long for his help, because you know that he will help you at all costs and no matter the time."
Lin Anxin felt a sense of grievance, and tears instantly flowed out: "Zhuoxi, do you know that I am under a lot of pressure when you are like this? I am afraid of your overthinking every time. If you are angry in your heart, just vent it out.
Once, even if you beat me or scold me, questioning me like this and doubting me is unbearable!"
She is a person who can't hide her words from the bottom of her heart. Over the years, she has learned to work hard to disguise herself, but in front of Zhuo Xi, she still can't avoid being suspected by him in vain.
She even regretted her decision a little, why she chose him instead of Yin Haoze.
As soon as this idea came up, Lin Anxin was shocked.
How could she have such a terrible idea? Questions and provocations from the outside world are not enough to make the relationship between two people truly fall apart. The only person who truly separates each other is the person involved.
Could it be that her heart has drifted?
Zhuo Xi said: "Are you under a lot of pressure? Do you know that I am also under a lot of pressure? I am busy at work every day, and I hold the position of a station director at a young age. How many people are waiting to see my jokes and try to pull me down?
?In addition to the pressure of work, I also have to worry about someone destroying the relationship between me and you, and I also have to reconcile the relationship between you and my mother. I am also very tired!"
Lin An's eyes burst into tears: "You feel tired from being with me, don't you?"
"Yes! If you are a considerate woman, you should not create pressure on me anymore. Can you stop having contact with him? Can you take the initiative to show kindness to my mother? Even if you suffer a little injustice for me? My mother also said
, you have never taken the initiative, do you want her to humbly apologize to you? I want to marry you, and I want to be together legitimately, and I am working hard. What have you tried hard for our relationship? For you
He said, you always have a spare tire anyway, so you just have to wait and enjoy the results and leave all the problems to me!"
"Zhuoxi..." Lin Anxin said sadly, "It's not that I don't want to have a good relationship with my aunt, but that she doesn't want to see me at all..."
"Don't put all the blame on my mother. She is stubborn, yes, but what about you? Can you deny the arrogance in your bones? You are unwilling to put down your dignity and show your kindness to my mother.
You are sensitive and fragile at heart and cannot bear to be hurt. You feel that no one in the world can bully you, but you hurt me again and again!"
"In your eyes, I am such a person! Why do you want to love me? Want to be with me? Zhuoxi, I am such a proud, fragile and annoying person! I am so annoying, in the future
Don't ever see me again!" With that said, Lin Anxin turned around and left.
One hand pulled Lin Anxin back hard and threw her heavily onto the bed. Zhuo Xi pressed Lin Anxin under him with blood-red eyes: "Are you going to run away again? Are you going to find Yin Haoze again?!
I tell you, you can’t even think of leaving home today!”
"Let me go!" Lin Anxin struggled desperately, trying to break free.
Zhuo Xi's kiss fell heavily, with aggression and plunder. During Lin Anxin's vigorous struggle, he was completely angered and took a fierce bite.
The clear smell of blood filled her mouth, and Lin Anxin felt the heartbreaking pain between her lips and teeth. Her tears flowed down, reaching the corners of her mouth with astringent saltiness.
Lin Anxin's tears were filled with despair and fear, and she cried so sadly. She stopped struggling like a wounded little animal and allowed Zhuo Xi to take advantage of her and ravage her.
When Zhuo Xi heard Lin Anxin's suppressed sobs, he froze immediately, stopped what he was doing, and sat aside dejectedly.
The air was depressingly silent, with only Lin Anxin crying silently and Zhuo Xi smoking silently.
After a long, long time, Zhuo Xi finished smoking his third cigarette and said softly: "I'm sorry..."
Lin Anxin had stopped crying. When she heard his apology, it seemed as if the pool that had just been filled was easily opened, and tears burst out again in an instant.
"I'm sorry, An Xin... I keep hurting you... Actually I don't want to, but I don't know what's going on, I just can't control it..." Zhuo Xi said regretfully and tried to hug her.
However, Lin Anxin instinctively shrank back.
She didn't dare to tell Zhuo Xi that she was becoming more and more afraid of him. In her heart, Zhuo Xi was no longer the gentle man she knew before. He had become suspicious and insecure.
She has no sense of security. Like Lin Anxin, she is also an extremely insecure person, so she will protect herself with arrogance and sensitivity. What she longs for is to find someone with a brighter background who seems to be able to rely on her for life.
, a man who gave her a sense of security. She once thought Zhuo Xi was the best candidate, but he changed.
Lin Anxin also understood that Zhuo Xi changed because of herself, because she brought him a lot of unsafe factors, which always put him in a bad situation of distrust. Lin Anxin didn't know what she should do, she thought
Trying to do well always backfires.
Zhuo Xi was heartbroken by Lin Anxin's avoidance. He hung his hands in the air and said sadly: "Anxin, do you hate me so much?"
Lin Anxin's voice was broken by sobs: "Zhuo Xi...I...I'm afraid of you..."
Just three words, "I'm afraid of you", were like a knife stabbed into Zhuo Xi's heart.
He loved her from the bottom of his heart, but he wanted to possess her completely. His original intention was to give her enough warmth to make her forget the past willingly. However, his behavior inadvertently hurt her, making her suffer again and again.
The crying gradually turned into fear of myself.
He loves her not to make her afraid of him.
"Have I made you so scared? An Xin, are you only afraid of me?" Zhuo Xi's heart was full of expectation. At this moment, he was more scared than Lin An Xin, afraid that she would answer in the affirmative without hesitation.
.
Lin An paused for a moment, shedding tears without making any sound.
Zhuo Xi endured it and said what he said most against his will: "An Xin, if you feel so sad to be with me, then... I will let you go..."
Lin Anxin raised her tear-stained eyes and looked at Zhuo Xi in surprise. She never expected that Zhuo Xi would say such a thing.
Are you feeling tired, or am I feeling tired?
Zhuo Xi, you are finally tired of me.
Lin Anxin suddenly stopped crying. Sometimes when she sheds tears for a person, she still has hope for him. But when all hope is gone, even the tears become stingy. In other words, there is nothing more sad than heartbreak.
, I can’t even cry anymore.
She stood up silently. She had always been a sojourner. From one place to another, there was no place where she truly belonged. Since she was leaving, she shouldn't linger around unnecessarily.
She walked to the door, stopped and wanted to say something to Zhuo Xi, but after opening her mouth, nothing came out.
Lin Anxin opened the door, and suddenly Zhuo Xi jumped out of the bed and hugged her tightly: "I'm sorry, I regretted it..."
"An Xin, forgive my selfishness, I don't want you to go..." Zhuo Xi buried her head in Lin An Xin's long hair, "I can't imagine what it's like to lose you."
Lin Anxin's tears burst again, and she slapped Zhuo Xi desperately: "Don't you think it's tiring to be with me? Don't you think you don't want to make each other sad? Don't you hate me very much?"
"I'm sorry... I'm sorry..." Zhuo Xi only murmured this sentence.
Lin Anxin also stopped slapping, feeling so confused that it was difficult to express. They kissed each other crazily, trying to get their emotions from each other. Although they clearly loved each other, they always kept hurting each other. Every time,
After the quarrel, there was a closer connection. They didn't know whether it was just to cover up the cracks for a while or to really resolve the past. They couldn't think too much and just wanted to hold on to the short-term happiness in front of them.