He humbly prayed for her to come back to him, but Xiaodie's expression made Shen Yifan unable to see any hope.
"You are not wrong! I am not wrong either! But if the two of us are together, it would be wrong!" Xiaodie thought of Mayfair, and her lips lost color.
"No! Xiaodie, I love you! There is nothing wrong with loving someone!" Shen Yifan stretched out his hand to grab Xiaodie, but Xiaodie easily retracted his hand on his knee.
"Shen Yifan, don't talk about love! Okay? That's love between you and Tong Sheng! Who am I? I'm just a tool for you to try!" Xiaodie was a little excited.
"Tool, what tool?" Shen Yifan looked at Xiaodie inexplicably.
"A tool used to prove that you are not gay, a tool used to cover up your shameful relationship with Tong Sheng... I say this, do you understand? What you want, Shen Yifan, is your business, but I beg you, don't involve me, okay?" Xiaodie clenched her hands into fists and tried to control her emotions, but she still seemed a little out of control!
He knew that saying such words would make him feel more uncomfortable than killing Shen Yifan directly, but this was the only way.
"Xiaodie..." Shen Yifan called out hopelessly, his expression a bit sad, which tugged at Xiaodie's heart.
"Shen Yifan, let's stop what happened in the past, okay? Let me go! I just want to be an ordinary person!" Xiaodie lowered her eyes and looked at the white sheets with tired eyes.
"Xiaodie, don't leave me! Okay? There are only two things in my life, one is you, and the other is my piano. If you leave me, I don't know how to survive..." Shen Yifan said desperately Xiaodie didn't dare to look at his expression.
Xiaodie's words touched the most painful place in his heart.
Even if he really has a relationship with Tong Sheng that is not accepted or understood, even if he is dragged by Tong Sheng and has been trapped in darkness, from the moment he saw Xiaodie, he knew that Xiaodie was him. That touch of sunshine that disperses the gloom.
I have been chasing and working hard. If the sunshine abandons me, I will fall into darkness forever. Life is worse than death!
"Shen Yifan, that's why I came today!" Xiaodie said, biting her lower lip.
"What's the purpose? Are you here to beg me to let you go?" Shen Yifan smiled bitterly at himself, but still looked at her with loving eyes, feeling sorry for Xiaodie's bitten lip.
"I'm here to tell you, cherish your life, I'm not worth it for you to give up your life and hurt your body! No one in this world is worth what you do! I'm even less worthy!" Xiaodie saw Shen Yi Fan's face, which was already pale, was now even more colorless, and an aura of decadence enveloped his face.
"Then what am I living for? Who do I care about my body for, and who cares about my life? Are they the reporters downstairs? They are just waiting to enjoy the pleasure that the tragedy of my death brings to them!" Shen Yi Fan growled lowly and stared at Xiaodie.
"Shen Yifan, please don't be so extreme, okay?" Xiaodie persuaded.
"Am I extreme? I really haven't figured out what I am living for? Am I just waiting for my grandfather to die and become the boss of the underworld? Is it like this to lead a group of brothers to fight and kill all day long? …”