My blood flowed out of my body and turned from hot to cold. I saw pairs of eyes that were contemptuous and contemptuous. Some of them were laughing, some were scolding, some were watching, and some were disdainful. I was the only one
I'm crying, but my tears are just shame in the eyes of these so-called upper-class people.
I waved my hand and threw the computer to the ground. The computer screen flickered helplessly, as if struggling, and finally went out.
I hugged my body and couldn't help shaking.
Perhaps Mu Shiqin had already seen the public opinion on the Internet.
The reason why he doesn't let me go out or go online is because he doesn't want me to see this.
It's a pity, but I still saw it. It was like experiencing it all over again. I felt that shameful time and process again.
I started to feel dirty again.
When I raise my hand, I feel that I am black. My hands are black, my feet are black, and my face is also black.
What a disgusting color.
Why am I so dirty! I ran to the bathroom, turned on the shower, and rinsed my body vigorously. I kept rubbing my hands vigorously. I only felt the pain of the rubbed skin. There were countless blood-red marks on my face.
Crazy criss-crossing, extremely bright red. I knew it was from my own nails. It didn’t hurt, but it was still so ugly.
Looking at myself in the mirror, I am wet. The clothes on my body are dripping with water, my hair is wet and stuck to my face. My lips are purple from the cold. My eyes are dull, like a body without a soul. I am just like a walking zombie.
I touched myself in the mirror, and for the first time I felt so terrible.
No, this shouldn't be me. How could this be me?
How could I be like this? I am so dirty, my body is so dirty, my clothes are so dirty, even my soul is dirty.
I should obviously have a more perfect life, a brighter road, and a happier life.
Why, why am I like this.
I started to get confused. I forgot that I had done it. I forgot that I was gang-raped. I forgot how dirty I was. I thought that as long as I didn’t think of it or tell it, no one would remember that dirty me.
, I thought that as long as I hid under Mu Shiqin's halo, I could start over. Everything could be started over. I could live anew. The tenderness and warmth given by Mu Shiqin made me vulnerable and like fantasy.
I actually forgot that my life is not in a fairy tale, but in cruel reality.
I was cut open by the bloody reality, and the disgusting pus and blood deep in my heart flowed out.
I tried hard to hide it, I tried hard to wrap myself up, but it was too late.
I lay on the bathroom floor, trembling and panting. I closed my eyes and heard the sound of water. It was like smashed tears, slowly flowing into the sewer.
I really want to just fall asleep like this, and then, when I open my eyes again, everything will be new. I am the newly born baby still crying in the swaddling clothes. What awaits me is not the dark abyss of hell, but full of fantasy.
A new life with possibilities. I can long for it, fantasize about it, and squander it to my heart’s content.
If I could, I would live a little selfishly, only for myself, only caring about my own gains and losses, my own happiness, my own happiness, and only pursuing what I want. Just like a person knows whether he is warm or cold when drinking water.
I knew that this was all my dream. When I opened my eyes again, there were still only those cold walls and the suffocatingly empty house.
And that cruel and cruel reality.
The days to come will definitely not be easy.
Sleeping, drinking, eating, having nightmares, one slowly chews the pain. The pain always comes later than the injury - the injured person does not feel much pain at the time, but the real pain will soon occur.