Now, the two of them no longer have any relationship. This is the best. They are still free. They are just students and do not need to bear too many responsibilities.
Moreover, Otowa has found another person, someone who loves her and cares for her. Although that person's character is a bit strange, he still doesn't like his overbearing character for Atobe Keigo, but he
But he knew clearly that Atobe Keigo absolutely loved Otowa a lot, even compared to his brother. He could tell at a glance whether it was true or false, not to mention that they were not capable of making such jokes.
people
Therefore, they should not have any regrets, and should not dwell in the past. All past grievances are just a matter of time. Once they have passed, they will never be able to get them back. So, what should he care about?
Otoyu walked forward and sat on the sofa. The maid had already poured a glass of water for her. She picked it up, took it in her hand, took a sip, and then raised her eyes to look at them.
"Brother, what were you talking about just now?" She also looked at Tezuka and smiled at him, a smile without any impurities, very pure and beautiful.
It's something they all want to treasure.
Oh, it’s nothing. Guoguang came over to see us. Sayato shook his hand gently, not intending to tell her what they talked about. She had the right to know about the surgery, but now, there is no need to give it to her.
too much pressure
Putting down the cup, Otoyu lowered his head, with some understanding in his eyes. In fact, she knew it even if he didn't say it, because she had heard about many surgeries, and it was another surgery.
She admitted that she was afraid of this word, but she had to face it all the time.
She raised her head and looked at the cold young man. He still looked like that. No one could guess what kind of emotions were in his pupils. He was emotionless and as cold as a stranger. Maybe it was because of him that he was like this.
I am a very indifferent person, but on the other hand, I am actually a careful person.
She turned around and looked at her room again. Maybe there were some things that she needed to settle. For her, the girl who had always loved her, the real Saya Otoyu, she hoped that something could be done for her. If not,
, maybe, there will be no chance. She is very grateful to her. It was her who took up her later happiness. She wants to give her something back, even if she can no longer feel it.
Standing up, her skirt cast a faint light, as if even the light had faded a lot.
"Brother, I kind of want to talk to Tezuka alone, is that okay?" She asked Sayato, but it was Tezuka who she was looking at.
Sayato frowned slightly, and now even the title has been changed.
"Kunimitsu," he looked at Tezuka and asked what he meant. After all, he needed to respect him. Although he didn't know what his sister wanted to talk to him about, he was still a little worried. Maybe the previous things had made him accustomed to it.
Facing these two people, it seems that there is nothing but harm.
"Okay," Tezuka stood at the starting point, nodded slightly, and then followed Otowa upstairs. Although he didn't know what she wanted to say to him, he would definitely do it as long as she asked.
, this is what he owes her, and at the same time, he also owes himself
The young man's light brown hair kept rising slightly as he walked, and his lower pupils hidden under the mirror were particularly delicate and firm.
Otowa opened her room and stood at the door. Tezuka walked in without hesitation. This was the first time he entered her room. It was a pure girl's room. It was very beautiful, with light blue tones, and everything was endless.
There was a row of books on the simple and generous desk, the curtains had been drawn, and there was an open-air window sill outside. He could even imagine that sometimes, she would sit there alone. Maybe this was her character, watching quietly.
holding everything
Not saying it doesn’t mean you don’t understand
Otoyu walked to the desk, took out a white-covered diary from it, then walked to Tezuka and handed it to her, "This is the former Saya Otoyu, you should know", she smiled, her smile
But with a bit of sadness
In the past, Saya Otowa was also a girl who made people feel distressed.
Tezuka held the diary in his hand, holding it tightly and looking at her in confusion. Was she the past?
Yinyu didn't speak anymore, walked to the bed and sat down, picked up the mobile phone on the bedside, and looked at the mobile phone from time to time, but she just looked at that message. She couldn't reply. It was better to hate her than to love her.
She can no longer give him what he wants. It's not that she doesn't love her, it's just because she loves him so much, so much.
My love, she can lose herself, but she can't lose him
Tezuka sat on the chair, opened the diary, and looked at the clear writing inside. At this time, apart from the sound of turning pages, there was only a faint scent of roses in the room.
disappearing
February 14th, today is Valentine's Day. I want to give Brother Guoguang the best gift. Maybe chocolate will be better. Everyone has given it to me. I just don't know if he will accept the love. Maybe, not.
I know he won't like me like this, and I'm not qualified anymore
According to what my father and the doctor said, in fact, I already knew that I had a serious heart disease. I had long felt that I was not healthy. I could not run, jump, do sports, or even play tennis at all. In fact,
, I really want to play tennis, just like Brother Guoguang, because I love him, so I also love his tennis. I have tried many times, but every time, my chest hurts. It hurts.
I couldn't breathe, and in the end I just held the racket feebly, unable to get closer. However, I couldn't tell my family these things. They were already very worried about me, and I didn't want them to worry and be sad anymore.
I am not a good daughter, nor a good sister. I know that I make my parents worry and my brother feel distressed. Even my brother still gave up his beloved tennis in order to take care of me, just because he wanted to take care of me.
He has a headache, but he is always the sister he loves
I looked at the chocolate in my hand. It was a very beautiful color. Others gave it to girls from boys, but I did it the other way around. I knew Brother Guoguang would not give it to me, but I just wanted to give it to him.
The next day, I carefully put the chocolates in my schoolbag and walked to the tennis court, only to find that there was a girl who was actually with Brother Guoguang. I knew that she was a second-year student named Qingmu Qiaojia.
A very beautiful girl and a healthy person
At this time, she also had a piece of chocolate in her hand, which was obviously given to him.
I felt a very familiar pain in my chest. I hid behind a tree and just stared at them blankly. Brother Guoguang, please don’t take it, don’t take it. Even if you don’t take it from me, please don’t be so cruel.
But, in the end, he still accepted it, yes, he accepted it. I looked at my schoolbag, and I had no reason to stay. I turned around, and I didn’t want to look at them anymore. Maybe they are the most important ones.
It matches, but what qualifications do I have?
Sitting under the shade of a tree, I took out the chocolates I bought. They were round and looked like the tennis balls he loved. I picked up one and ate it in my mouth. It tasted really bitter. I found that I really
I don’t like the taste of this. I don’t know why others like it. Is it the feeling of being in love? It is always bitter and sweet, but why do I only feel bitter?
On February 15th, I went to a food store. There were the latest earrings, but I didn’t have my ears pierced because I was afraid of pain. I have always been afraid of pain, and I was afraid of injections. But, I knew that at this time, there was a kind of pain.
Already transcended everything
Then, the feeling of heartache, the feeling of heartache
The young lady stood in front of me. A pain came from my ears. My heart shrank. It turned out that it still hurts. From then on, I had my first piercing in my ears.
I touched my slightly red and swollen ears and could only smile, but it was powerless.
When I got to school that day, I let my hair down and let it block everything else. My face was still wearing those opaque glasses. I had worn them for so long that I no longer knew what I really looked like.
This way, I feel very safe. Even if I cry, no one will see it.
I know
In fact, I'm just a child, a child who doesn't get attention
When I walked to the school, I heard crying again and again. When I walked forward, I found that the crying person sitting on the ground was actually the Qingmu who gave Guoguang brother chocolate yesterday.
And the girls standing around
"I'm warning you, don't be so shameless. Senior Tezuka has a fiancée. You don't even look at what you look like. How dare you seduce him?"
With tears on her face, Qingmu sat on the ground and looked at these people who bullied her, her body shaking from time to time. I just like him, which is not wrong. Moreover, Tezuka-senpai doesn't like her at all."
Yes, when I heard this, I felt pain in my heart again. I don’t know how many times this has happened. He doesn’t like me. I know it. I know it better than anyone else. I know my engagement contract, but I know that he doesn’t like me.
It will make him hate me even more, but I can't let go. If my life is really that short, then I just want to love well, even if I just hate it.
Looking at the tearful girl on the ground, I don't have much affection for her, but I won't hate her. There is nothing wrong with liking someone. Maybe I want my envy to be more, after all.
, Brother Guoguang doesn’t hate her, right?
I saw the group of girls again. At this time, they didn't see me, they were just threatening Qingmu. The leader was Nazenka. I knew that she was not sincere in being friends with me, but was just using my identity.
She just wants to get close to Brother Guoguang. I can’t stop her even if I don’t stop her. In fact, she is not that bad.
I know
At this time, a series of footsteps sounded. I turned around and saw unexpected people, Qingxue and people from the tennis club.
Of course there is him, my brother Guoguang, but he doesn't even look at me. However, I can already see that he is really angry now, because they are bullying the people he cares about.
girl
That's it, Qingmu Qiaojia, I'm really lucky that I have the best protective color, my glasses, so that I can't see my loss and my sadness.
Turning around, I accidentally saw a pair of ice blue eyes, such beautiful eyes. At this time, they were also looking at me with disgust. The other people in the tennis club were all blaming me, except for that head
The boy wearing a turban, it’s not that he didn’t blame him, it’s that he didn’t even look at me
Obviously, I am innocent, right? But, what can I explain? Even if I explain, they won’t believe it. The wind in February is actually very cold. I already know it very well.
I turned around and saw the group of girls running towards me, as if seeking my protection. However, what else do I have the ability to do? I can't even protect myself. However, looking at their scared looks, I felt so soft-hearted.
In fact, they are all children, and they do this just to find an outlet for themselves to vent their anger.
I saw Brother Guoguang lifting up the girl and lowering his head very carefully. I knew I had no right to cry, but I really felt very uncomfortable.
Oh, what does the title of fiancée give me? I'm afraid it doesn't give me anything. What I have is just more and more distance from him, and distance is intangible, and it is also an insurmountable distance.
No matter it was before or now, he and I may always just stand on both sides of the world. At the end, there is silent sadness and real proof.
He doesn't like me and never will
I smiled slowly, but actually there was an unspeakable bitterness in my heart. Brother Guoguang, if one day I am no longer here, will you miss me? Will you miss me the same way as your brother? No, maybe, you won’t miss me at all.
You won't miss me, because you will never like me
"Did you do it?" I heard his voice, like a cold wind blowing on me, chilling me to the bone.
I saw them dodge in fear in front of me, and their eyes that fell down were filled with too many injuries. I touched my earlobe, and I already had one in my ear, but I couldn't forget the pain at that time.
Some pain is unforgettable and unspeakable, just like now
I straightened up slightly and looked at the person I loved, my brother Guoguang. Since when did he stop calling me by my name? I still remember that when I was a child, he liked to call me Xiaoyin.
Now, he is already stranger than a stranger
"Didn't you all see it?" Looking at him, you can completely see the increasingly cold expression on his face. Such a perfect face, such exquisite face pupils, but full of disgust for me.
Yeah, I know, he hates me
I know that we can never go back, we can never go back. Before the late autumn wind blows, maybe I will no longer be in this world.
"There won't be a next time, otherwise, I will never let you go." I heard his voice, but I felt hazy in front of my eyes. Next time, what will happen next time? Do we have a next time?
It wasn't until the sound of footsteps getting further and further away that I looked back at them. However, all they gave me was their disappearing figure.
Brother Guoguang, actually, I really love you, really love you
Shaye, thank you. I heard their thanks, but they just smiled sadly and turned around, sadly, and left.
After school in the afternoon, I went to that boutique again. It was you. The boss could recognize me at a glance because the glasses on my glasses almost covered half of my face.
"Sister, I want to get another shot," I touched my right earlobe, and it felt painful again.
The boss didn't say anything and walked over, still holding the tool in his hand, but I felt the fear coming from the depths of my soul.
"Don't be afraid, it's just a pain. I've already hit one, and the second one will be fine." She saw my fear and comforted me. I heard her voice, which was very warm and like a child.
I feel like my brother, my parents, and everyone in Qingxue are now afraid of me but also hate me. I know, I haven’t heard such a friendly voice for a long time.
"Sister, I'm not afraid," I smiled at her. The boss just sighed slightly and slapped my ear. I was still smiling at the familiar pain, but there were already tears in my eyes.
I've been spinning around, but I'm the only one who sees the patience
It hurts so much that it may be numb
In March, the cherry blossoms were already blooming beautifully. I stretched out my hand and let the petals fall into my hand. It was so beautiful, so pink, and so tender. But, I put down my hand, and the petals finally fell in my hand.
On my feet, no matter how beautiful the scenery is, there will always be a day when all the flowers will fall. No matter how beautiful a life is, there will be a moment when it comes to an end.
I reached out and touched my ears. It was already 6 years old. Every time I felt sad, I would get an ear pierced. Even the boss of that shop no longer pierced my ears. She said that people’s ears have piercings.
Too many nerves, so maybe one day I will hurt myself
But, what else can hurt me now? I don’t care about anything anymore.
I took out the mirror from my schoolbag and saw my current appearance in the mirror. Now I can be said to be less human-like and ghost-like. Now I am really a bad girl.
Dying my hair, piercing my ears, and forming cliques. Everyone is afraid of me and hates me. Only my brother. Thinking of the brother who loves me to the end, he loves me and dotes on me as always, but I am destined to disappoint him.
Their attack on Qingmu was stronger before the name, but I didn't want to care about it. I tightened my fiery red hair, which was not suitable for me. I walked forward. When I saw the group of people, I just
Standing and watching, Qingmu's cries, the warning in front of the name, and a lot of sounds sounded. In the end, only the simple syllables fell in my ears. I thought, I was indifferent because there was nothing.
Want to care
These days, I have been going to the tennis court. I just wanted to take a good look at Brother Guoguang, even just one glance. But I didn't expect that the group of girls following me would cause all the trouble in the tennis club. I just stayed cold.
He looked at everything and didn't try to stop it
I just want him to pay more attention to me, even if he hates me
The people in the tennis club hate me even more. If my father hadn't been the president, maybe they would have kicked me out long ago. I don't care, I don't care, but why do I want to cry?
Turning around, everything has nothing to do with me. Maybe I will have to say goodbye soon. The pain in my chest is becoming more and more unbearable. Oh, yes, the end of life may be coming soon.
Goodbye, maybe forever
Brother Guoguang, in fact, I am still selfish. I let you remember me selfishly. However, you always like me when you hate me. Now, I am really glad that you have never liked me, so that you will not be sad.
It’s just brother, father and mother. I’m sorry, I’m really sorry.
Turning around, I looked up at the sky. It was a clean light blue, and the cherry blossoms were still flying in the distance. It was so beautiful, so beautiful that I couldn’t let it go.
I know that every turn around may be my last
Actually, I'm not bad, really not bad
But, I know, no one will know anymore, and no one wants to know either
This is the best result
The diary has been written here, it is already the last page, and there is no more writing. The diary has traces of being turned over, because I am remembering it every day, and I am looking at it every day.