"What should I do?" Looking at Darius sitting down next to me, I tilted my head and asked a question that I didn't know what it meant.
"Solve it in your own way." Darius also looked directly into my eyes and raised his faint smile. His fair skin seemed to have made people accustomed to this kind of despair.
"What is my own way?" I stroked the soft down in my arms. I never understood myself.
"Be brave, many things will be easier than you think." Darius looked up at the starry night sky and couldn't figure out which star his eyes fell on.
"Can I be like you and just take things as they come?" I blinked, resting my chin on my knees, looking at Darius's beautiful profile.
"Would you cry if I really died?" Darius was stunned for a moment and deliberately changed the subject.
"That will happen decades later." Actually, I wanted to say I don't know, but suddenly I felt sad.
"What is death? It seems... it is simpler than my life." After a moment of silence, I said to myself in the dark night
"I want to leave, anywhere is fine, as long as no one knows me"
I feel strange, and suddenly I feel that I have always been a fool when facing everyone. In my consciousness since I was a child, I have been looking for what a mother is. Why do children without mothers look like grass? How pitiful are the hearts of parents in the world?
I have always regarded my existence in this world as a mistake, and I have lived with a sense of responsibility.
I have never asked for anything from the world. The only thing is that I really want to know what kind of maternal love everyone enjoys. I even blamed the woman with big curly hair for raising me and then alienating me indifferently.
Just leave so that no one can find you, or rather... forget about yourself.
"Daris, if you die, I won't be happy, but I won't be sad either."
"I'm a bad girl, I have no qualifications for anyone, that's it, I didn't do anything"
Facing the world, I have always had such low self-esteem. I can't deceive myself. Facing everyone, I will use a posture to disguise the low self-esteem in my heart, and then pretend to be strong for myself.
"Idiot, good night, remember to get up early tomorrow." Darius took the cat in my arms, left me a relaxed sentence, turned around and went downstairs.
What's this? It's rare for me to be so sentimental. I just didn't comfort him and acted like I didn't hear anything.