Chapter 629: Self-knowledge of warmth and coldness: If you are well, it will be sunny
It was as if this clean winter morning was the most peaceful paradise God had given him.
"It's very warm." I don't know how long I stared at him stupidly before Darius opened his eyes and slowly looked at me, with his gentle smile still hanging on his pale face.
He said to me very contentedly, and pulled me to sit down on the big stone next to him that had sublimated the mist.
Sitting on a large smooth stone, breathing the freshest natural air and feeling the purest sunshine, I did not feel the warmth that Darius mentioned.
Sitting next to him, I suddenly imagined whether he would gradually disappear like a tragedy in a TV series, leaving me here alone.
Then the world was gone without him, without a boy named Darius, without the only guy who called me Qing'er...
I was thinking wildly, and my suppressed heart was so painful that I didn't want him to die. I only had one thought in my mind, if he died... I asked myself
"If you die, I will cry, I will cry all the time." He sniffed his sour nose, tears welling up in his eyes uncontrollably, but he did not dare to fall.
Why is my heart so uncomfortable? I am more afraid of being alone than ever. Without him, it feels like half of my soul is missing.
"Good boy, that will happen decades later." Darius caressed my head, looked at my tear-filled eyes, hesitated deeply, put down his hand, and put me on his shoulder.
"Emotions are selfish, and I am no exception."
"Qing'er, do you understand what I mean?" Darius gently held my shoulders and asked me to get closer to him.
Leaning between his left clavicle, I could still vaguely feel the rhythmic heartbeat of his right heart, and his steady breath was hitting the gap in my hair, which was still a little warm.
"If you are well, it will be a sunny day. I don't want to understand anything. Everyone wants to be well." At this moment, my mind seems not to have many thoughts, and my heart is still. I just want to feel him quietly.
Whether you say I'm greedy or whether you're discriminating against me, it doesn't matter.
I leaned peacefully in Darius's arms, watching the sun rise higher and higher in the east, and the temperature gradually warmed up, until I woke up completely this winter morning.
The gravity on my head slowly increased, and I gently held Darius's chin, leaving his arms, and then let him look at his shoulders while he was sleeping.
I gently stroked his cold shoulder, breathing too calmly. Every minute he slowly fell asleep, I almost counted his heartbeats with fear, because I was afraid... I was afraid that Darius was really tired.