Who is Liu Haizhu who wants to cause trouble for Little Beijing? Because Liu Haizhu is an important character in the following story, he must be introduced to a certain extent
Putting aside the deeds of Liu Haizhu for the moment, the style of Liu Haizhu alone is enough to make people admire him. Let’s first introduce this person from his body and facial features. He was about 33 or 4 years old at the time, but he looked like he was in his 40s. He was not the ordinary vicissitudes of 178cm or so.
His height and weight are at most 110 kilograms, and it must be called "gross weight", that is, the weight of his clothes. How thin is he? Ergou remembers when he first played the video game "Master" in the first grade of junior high school.
After choosing the mummy with the double swords, a classmate next to Ergou exclaimed: "Isn't this fucking Liu Haizhu?" This shows how thin Liu Haizhu is.
This person has a long face with no flesh at all. His nose is high and straight, his lips are thin, and his chin is pointed. Few people in the city have seen what his eyes and eyebrows look like, because this person has no idea what his eyes and eyebrows are like.
In spring, summer, autumn and winter, he wears a bamboo hat! Ergou has lived for twenty-six years, and the only person he has ever seen wearing a bamboo hat alive is him. The bamboo hat he wore was huge, completely covering his eyes and eyebrows, so
He looks very insidious. He can see other people's eyes, but others can't see his eyes. He once saw the man named Yan Nanfei in the popular TV series "The End of the World".
Ergou always wears such a bamboo hat and still doesn’t know where he got it. Anyway, it’s probably the only one in the Northeast.
He also had a unique goatee. Although it was not trimmed deliberately, it was very stylish. You know, in the 1980s, all men in China shaved their beards cleanly.
He wears a pair of yellow rubber shoes every day and a pair of blue canvas cropped trousers or cropped trousers. I don’t know exactly what cropped trousers they are. Anyway, cropped trousers have been popular since the late 1990s. Liu Haizhu was in his 80s.
He has been wearing it since the mid-1900s, and he is definitely ahead of the trend. He usually doesn't wear a shirt in summer, and is shirtless, showing off his ribs. In winter, he wears a military cotton-padded jacket underneath and a cloak outside.
His mount is also a 28-kilo truck, but this 28-kilo truck has been simplified to the point where it can no longer be simplified. It has no kickers, no roofs, no rear racks, no chain boxes, no brakes, and even feet.
There is only a bare stick left in the cross, and he rides on it like riding two bare wheels.
It is conceivable that there is such a person, wearing a hat, bare arms and ribs clearly visible, wearing a pair of cropped trousers, the only clearly visible part of the face is the lamentable goatee, riding a car with almost nothing left
When a 28-kilo truck with two wheels off is speeding past you, can you not keep him in mind? He is definitely not the most famous and powerful gangster in the city, but he is definitely the most stylish in the city.
The bastard remembers that when Ergou was in junior high school, the art teacher asked him to draw a painting with the character "Lonely on a boat and fishing alone in the snow on the cold river." Basically, all the students in the class drew the "Copycat Jacket" based on the image of Liu Haizhu.
”, it can be seen that the image of this person in the hearts of the people of our city is indeed indelible.
Liu Haizhu is the owner of the detention center. If he is not seen in the city for ten days, he must have gone in.
He has never married, but never marrying does not necessarily mean that he has no sex. It is said that he not only has sex, but also has extremely strong sex, and his sexual ability is beyond ordinary people, but his sexual orientation is quite different and unconventional. What is his sex and sex ability?
Ergou doesn’t know this either, but Ergou has heard Little Beijing describe it, and it’s impossible to tell whether Ergou is real or fake. The following content is all from Little Beijing’s mouth:
It is said that Liu Haizhu was relatively wealthy at the time. Every night when the farmer's market was about to close, he would walk to the pork stall in the farmer's market:
"Master, here are two kilograms of pork." Because he was covered by a bamboo hat, no one could see his eyes. They could only see his goatee shaking. "Okay, I'll weigh it for you."
"No bones allowed. I want a whole piece of pork with one bone. I will smash your stall tomorrow."
"Easy to say, easy to say, there must be no bones, I will cut it for you."
"Pa", the pork is cut and placed in front of Liu Haizhu
"Master, use your knife to poke a hole in this piece of pork for me! You can only poke it once." Liu Haizhu said, "Why do you want to poke a hole in this piece of pork!?" The stall owner asked, "I asked you to poke a hole in it!"
Just poke, why are you asking so many questions?"
Later, everyone knew that every time Liu Haizhu came here, he would weigh two kilograms of pork and then poke a hole in the pork. No one asked. What he wanted to do by poking a hole in the pork was always a mystery. No one knew.
have no idea
The real answer to the mystery was that one time he invited four brothers to his house for a meal and told the truth after drinking. It is said that he cooked two dishes for these brothers that day, namely stir-fried pork with garlic moss and stir-fried pork with green pepper.
I shared a bottle of 56% white wine weighing one pound and drank it while eating. After a while, the dishes were all gone and the wine was almost finished.
"It's better than Prime Minister ***. Now you can buy meat if you have money, and you don't have to use meat stamps," said one of Liu Haizhu's brothers.
"Well, how is the meat today?" Liu Haizhu asked, "Not bad, not bad, really good."
"That's right, I've moved this flesh before." Although Liu Haizhu's eyes couldn't be seen, you could still feel that he was a little proud. "How did you move it?"
"Every day when I buy pork, I ask the butcher to cut it. I don't have a wife either. When I come back every day, I take off my clothes, then I stuff my ass into the pork and start fucking it three or four times."
I’ll cut it up and eat it after the next time." Liu Haizhu said this with no expression on his face.
But he disgusted his brothers so much
"Brother Zhuzi, have you fucked the pork we ate today?" One of his brothers tried not to vomit, wanting to make sure and verify.
"Of course I did"
"Wow..." Liu Haizhu's two brothers vomited out on the spot. "Fuck! I've washed this fucking meat! It's clean! Look at how bad you two are!" Liu Haizhu was confident and very confident.
Disdainful of these two brothers who have never seen the world
"Brother Zhuzi, did you leave your thing in this meat?" A brother whose gastrointestinal and digestive system was obviously much better asked him fearfully. Translated into modern words, this sentence is "Brother Zhuzi, you are in this pork*"
*?"
"Well, if I don't get it inside, where can I get it?" Liu Haizhu was still calm. This brother with a relatively good digestive system couldn't bear it anymore and vomited on the spot.
It is said that there was one person who didn't vomit at that time. This person's nerves seemed to be made of steel, and he was as calm as Liu Haizhu, but he should never say this again
"Brother Zhuzi, are you bored with this pork? If you are interested in pigs, why don't you just find a sow and have sex with her?"
"Oh, the sow did it too, but it was too loose and still this tight."
The only brother who didn't vomit fainted on the spot
After narrating the incident, Xiao Beijing added that of the four people who had dinner at Liu Haizhu's house that day, two of them later became Buddhists and the other two became Islam. Anyway, one thing that can be determined is that these four people are
No one ever eats a bite of pork again
Although Ergou had no way to verify the credibility of Little Beijing’s words, and he is still half-convinced to this day, Ergou believed that there was nothing wrong with Liu Haizhu’s approach. After all, at that time, there was no way to buy an inflatable doll in China. As the saying goes: Innovation is a country
and the soul of the nation. Although China is developing rapidly now, it is still engaged in some labor-intensive low-end manufacturing industries. There is still a long way to go before it is an innovative country. Ergou believes that the main reason is: Chinese people are smart.
There is no doubt about it, but the Chinese love to castrate the innovative ability that humans should have. Liu Haizhu's use of pork as a tool for sex is undoubtedly an innovative move, but it is difficult for everyone to accept it. How sad! If his method can pass
If it is promoted through appropriate channels, can the sexual happiness index of Chinese men make great progress? (Forgive Ergou for speaking half a sentence in English. If he speaks Chinese, I am afraid that everyone will think of News Network, which is almost as disgusting as that piece of pork.) Then
The reporter said that women are allowed to use cucumbers but Liu Haizhu is not allowed to use pork? Is there a big difference between plants and animals? Is it very big?
Ergou still clearly remembers the first time he met Liu Haizhu. That time he left a very good impression on Ergou, thinking that he was not only an innovative talent, but also a chivalrous and righteous man. Zhao Hongbing had not eloped with Gao Huan that day.
I took my two dogs to watch a movie. The movie is called "Northern and Southern Shaolin"
Ergou went to the Cultural Cinema in the city center that day. There is a medium-sized square in front of the Cultural Cinema. One of the functions of this square is that the court often comes here to hold public trials, so there is also a flagpole erected there.