Tomorrow, I will figure out a way to get him back, after all, tomorrow is another day. - Margaret Mitchell, "Gone with the Wind"
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"I don't love you..." Xiaochuan turned his back to Ruochu and said these words one by one, with no emotion in his voice. Then he walked towards his room, and Ruochu followed a few steps away.
, stretched out his arms and tightly hugged Xiaochuan's waist from behind, and pressed his little face against Xiaochuan's back.
Xiaochuan couldn't move for a moment. Ruochu's action was something he didn't expect. After living together for so many days, except for that time when they were frightened on the road and had to hug her during a thunderstorm, the two of them had never been so close.
Physical contact, if Chu was so tightly attached to his back, he could even feel her rapid heartbeat and breath, as well as the softness of her body and the strength of her arms, and his breathing speeded up unconsciously.
Got up.
"Ruoruo, don't be like this..." Xiaochuan said with difficulty while adjusting his breathing. He wanted to break away from her. It shouldn't be difficult to break away from her with his own strength, but he was afraid that such an action would hurt her. After all, he just said
He was already worried that she would be hurt by his cold refusal.
"I don't believe it, Xiaochuan, I don't believe you don't love me. Can you let me stay with you? Just like before?" Ruochu's arms did not dare to relax at all, and she murmured to herself.
, I didn’t realize that hot tears were already flowing down my cheeks.
Xiaochuan's thin lips pursed into a line, his thick eyebrows knitted together, and his heart felt like a knife. He didn't think that if he could really be like before, then he would have no other demands in this life, but he knew it was a luxury.
, and to desire it is not something that a person of his age should think about.
"I don't want to leave you, please don't ignore me, okay? I don't want anything in this life, I just want to stay by your side, let me love you, let me accompany you, you can treat me as your daughter, but don't let me
Leave you, please..." Ruochu's voice began to choke. She seemed calm on the surface these past few days, but in fact she was constantly fighting fiercely inside.
She didn't want to say these words, because she knew that if she said them, there would be only two results, and even if there was only one ten thousandth chance of failure, she was unwilling to take the risk, because she couldn't afford to lose, and she was really afraid of losing.
He, but today, at this moment, she couldn't help it anymore, she just said it, and she would not let herself regret it again.
Xiaochuan took a deep breath, turned around awkwardly, stretched out his hands and grabbed Ruochu's arms, "Ruoruo, let's have a good talk, okay?"
The two of them sat at the table in the dining room. Xiaochuan opened a bottle of wine and filled it for both Ruochu and himself.
For a long while, no one was willing to speak, and no one touched the food on the table.
"Ruoruo, you know, I like you very, very much. I have liked you very much since you were a child. When you were just born, you would smile at me, your eyes bent into two small crescents..." Xiaochuan shouted
He took a sip of wine and began to talk to himself, but with his head lowered, he could feel Ruochu's bright eyes following him.
"At that time, your father was not around, and your mother was the only one taking you in a foreign country, so it was my responsibility. At that time, I regarded you as...as my own daughter, do you understand?" Xiaochuan said and looked up.
He glanced at Ruochu and said, "You have to believe that everything I do is for your own good. When your daughter grows up, she will get married sooner or later. Daddy can't always be by your side..."
"What if we get married? Can we be together forever?" Ruochu interrupted Xiaochuan. This was not the first time she mentioned this proposal in front of him.
"Don't talk nonsense, how can a father and his daughter get married?" Xiaochuan glared at Ruochu, not knowing whether he was drunk or not, his face was a little red.
"You are not my father at all." Ruochu said through gritted teeth.
Xiaochuan was startled for a moment, then smiled bitterly and shook his head, "When the child grows up, he doesn't even recognize his father, right?"
"You know that's not what I meant. We are not related by blood at all. Why can't we get married?" Ruochu is also a person who accepts death. Even ten cows can't bring back what she has determined.
"But, I treat you like..."
"A father's love for his daughter, right?" Ruochu answered and Xiaochuan nodded. This was the only thing Ruochu said tonight that he should agree with. It was something he should agree with intellectually. As for whether he agreed with it emotionally, he
Can't tell clearly either.
"Do you think that just because of this relationship, this big hat can cover up our love?" Ruochu became more and more bold as he spoke, and Xiaochuan did not dare to raise his head.
"Ruoruo, my love for you is not what you imagined..." Xiaochuan tried to make her understand, but it was awkward no matter how he said it. The word "love" was really far away and unfamiliar, but today it was...
I have to mention it frequently, but I feel it is inappropriate for my age.
"Don't even think about denying it. If you didn't love me, would you be willing to drop everything and travel with me? If you didn't love me, would you be so nervous when I was almost hit by a car? If you didn't love me
Me, will I think about getting up at night to close the window for me when the weather changes? At a loss when I am sick? Do you dare to say that you are unhappy when you are with me?" Ruochu was aggressive and counted all the things Xiaochuan did for her.
Everything that happened in his life, maybe it was just a trivial matter, but for Ruochu, every bit of it was enough to convince her that he loved her just as much as she loved him.
"Ahem, isn't it right for a father to do this to his daughter?" Xiaochuan didn't expect that Ruochu would remember all this, and he was moved but had to deny what she said.
"Okay, even if those things are what a father should do to his daughter, it can't prove anything, but if you don't love me, then why do you dodge your eyes unnaturally when I find you looking at me sometimes? Are you afraid that I will misunderstand you?
You and Michelle, why did you go out of your way to explain to me? Are you afraid that I will find out when you go to visit a doctor at home? Excuse me, is this kind of fatherly love normal?" Ruochu's logic seemed impeccable, but Xiaochuan was choked for a moment and was unable to fight back.
"The fact is that since you came back this time, you no longer regard me as the same child, because the intervening ten years have been enough to make us strangers to the point where we need to re-establish a relationship, and we are men and women.
Do you still want to deny your feelings?" After Ruochu said this, he stood up so excitedly that he held his hands on the table and looked directly at Xiaochuan condescendingly, observing his subtle expressions.
Xiaochuan's hand holding the cup shook inadvertently. This subtle movement did not escape Ruochu's eyes. Xiaochuan had to put the cup firmly on the table, "It's your business if you want to think so, but it's mine.
Our position will not change. We all need to calm down. You should go to bed early. I will clean up here tomorrow morning." Xiaochuan stood up and walked out while supporting the table with his hands.
"Humbert, I won't give up." Ruochu said loudly behind him.
Xiaochuan didn't stop this time.
Xiaochuan's house was always filled with smoke even if the windows were open that night. Every word Ruochu said kept running through his mind, and it also touched the nerves passing by from time to time. He originally thought that if he distanced herself from her, things would be fine.
It was done, but it was a lot more complicated. What made him even more depressed was that he actually found that what she said made sense.
She revealed many things that he was not aware of, such as his feelings for her. He always thought that the feelings he had when he first held her in Boston 18 years ago were the same and had not changed.
But after she said that, he had to take a closer look.
Before Ruo Chu was six years old, if his feelings for her were his father's love and responsibility, a kind of feeling like treating a treasure that was feared to melt in the palm of his hand, then what about twelve years later, when he returned to China?
In the past few days, just as Ruochu said, it seems that there are really more than just those original feelings, although the original feelings are still there.
On top of that, he increased his appreciation for her and increased his dependence due to trust, because they had a common language and reached equality, instead of the one-sided love he had for a little girl.
Ask yourself, when he and she discussed the contents of the magazine together, when they worked together for the same thing and were happy and disappointed at the same time, when they were pretending to be a cooking competition but actually they wanted to do more for each other.
, did he really just regard her as his daughter?
Xiaochuan had to admit that Ruochu was right, and precisely because she was right, he couldn't let this wrong relationship that shouldn't have happened continue to go wrong.
Maybe, leaving can be a solution. When you don't know how to face something, just give time to deal with everything instead of escaping, Xiaochuan told himself this.
When he was about to get off work the next day, Ruochu received an email from Xiaochuan, saying that the American publishing company had some things to deal with recently, and he had to go back. The length of time was not certain, and the email was set to be sent at a scheduled time. Ruochu
When he saw this email, Xiaochuan had already flown away.
In just a few lines, all of which were work-related explanations, the two magazines were once again handed over to her. It was the same as last time, except that this time Ruochu no longer had the energy and emotion to ensure that she could fully bear the responsibility.
stand up.
She expected that he might continue to neglect her for a while, but as long as he stayed by her side, she had hope, but he just flew away without any reason, taking all her thoughts and love with him.
, it was the first time in her life that she fell in love with someone, the first time she put down all her self-esteem and took all the courage to confess to him, but the result was this. Ruochu hugged her legs and looked at the Donald painted by Xiaochuan on the living room wall in a daze.
, At this moment, she wanted to cry but couldn't. She said she would not give up, but what should she do to not give up? No matter what, she still had hope. If she just bowed her head like this, she didn't know her spiritual world.
Will it collapse?
Yes, you must never give up! As long as the sun will rise, you must continue to work hard for yourself and that person's happiness.