I haven’t laughed in a few days, and I’m still sad because I’m still sad
‘Then you, this kid, haven’t been happy for a few days,’ said Ying’s mother.
"We have to make her happy," Ying's father said
‘What should I do?’ said Ying’s mother.
"Grandma, grandpa, look, the kite we flew is so high," Si Zhe said
"Let the two children see if it will be helpful to Sakura," Sakura's father said.
'Well, Si Zhe, Si Leng, come here, grandma has something to say to you,' Ying's mother said.
"What's the matter, grandma?" Si Leng and Si Zhe ran over.
"Look, your mother hasn't been happy for a few days. Can you make her happy?" Ying's mother said
"Then how can I make my mother happy?" Si Leng said
"Let's see what good ideas your brains can come up with," Ying's father said.
‘Yes, let’s do it’ Si Zhe said
,,,,,,,Si Lengsi opened the door quietly and saw me sitting on the bed without saying a word.
‘Mom’ is cold and Si Zhe shouted
‘It’s you, what’s the matter?’ I forced a smile and said
‘Mom, are you unhappy?’ Si Zhe said
"How do you know?" I touched Si Zhe's head and said
"You can tell it at a glance. Can you tell us what kind of thing you encounter?" Sileng said
"That's right, mom," Si Zhe said coquettishly.
‘This’ I lowered my head and couldn’t speak.
‘Mom, since you won’t tell me, how about we tell you a story?’ Sileng said.
'Yeah' I nodded and said
‘A patient came to the psychiatrist.
Patient: I always feel like I am a bird.
Doctor: Oh, that’s serious. When did it start?
Patient: Ever since I was a little bird...
.A doctor at a neurological hospital asked a patient: What would happen to you if I cut off one of your ears?
The patient replied: Then I won't be able to hear it.
The doctor heard this: Yes, that's normal.
The doctor asked again: What would happen to you if I cut off your other ear?
The patient replied: Then I can't see it. The doctor became nervous, how could he not see it?
The patient replied: Because the glasses will fall off.
(3) Two mental patients escaped from the hospital. They ran and ran and climbed to a tree. One of them jumped down from the tree and rolled.
Then he raised his head and said to the person above: Hey, why don't you come down?
The man above answered him: No - OK - ah - I'm not familiar with it yet...
(4) There is an old lady in the mental hospital,
Wearing black clothes and holding a black umbrella, he squatted at the entrance of the mental hospital every day.
The doctor thought: To cure her, we must start by understanding her.
So the doctor also wore black clothes and held a black umbrella, squatting there with her. The two squatted in silence for a month.
, the old lady finally spoke to the doctor: Excuse me, are you also a mushroom?
(5) A certain mental hospital heard that the leader was coming to the hospital to inspect the situation, so the director called a meeting with the patients.
At the meeting, the dean said: "This afternoon, very important leaders are coming to visit, and everyone must go to the door to welcome them."
During the welcome, all patients should stand on both sides of the hospital entrance and should stand neatly. When I cough, everyone should applaud together, the more enthusiastically, the better; when I stamp my feet, they must all stop, and no one can make a mistake. Everyone should do it
Okay, we can have meat buns for everyone tonight. As long as one person messes up, everyone will have no buns to eat, remember? quot;
The patients in the audience shouted together: "Remember!"
That afternoon, the leader arrived on time. When he stepped into the door, the welcoming patients were already standing at the door. At this time, as the director coughed, all the patients applauded together, and the atmosphere was very warm. Visitors
Infected by the warm atmosphere, the leader walked into the hospital with a smile on his face and applauded with everyone. Seeing that the leader had already entered the hospital, the director stamped his foot, and all the applause stopped, very neatly. Only this leader was still smiling.
He smiled and clapped as he moved forward. The dean felt very satisfied.
Suddenly, a patient as strong as Schwarzenegger sprang out from the welcoming crowd, strode up to the leader, rounded his fist and gave him a big slap in the face.
He shouted angrily: "You don't want to eat steamed buns anymore?" The Beijingers, the French, and the Americans were walking in the desert together and were about to die of thirst. Suddenly the three of them found a magic lamp and took it out.
He bought a magic lamp and said, "I can grant three wishes to each of you."
Americans were the first to say "I want a box of dollars"
"There are two more,"
"Well, here's another box of dollars."
"The last one"
"Well, the last one is to send me back to the United States."
Phew, the Americans are missing, and the French are also anxious, "I want a beautiful woman."
Here comes a "Well, I want another beautiful woman"
"There is one more" "Well, send me back to France"
Phew, the French are gone too, only the Beijingers are left. He said calmly,
"Give me a bottle of Erguotou"
"Two more wishes"
“Another bottle of Erguotou”
"There's another one"
When the Beijingers saw that it was not interesting to drink two bottles of wine alone, they said, "Bring them back again and drink with me." Phew, the Americans and the French are back again
. So the three people continued walking, but with good luck, they found another magic lamp and took out a magic lamp. "Haha, I am the younger brother of the magic lamp just now. My magic is not that high, I can only
"Give each of you two wishes." This time the French and Americans thought that it was useless to say anything and they would die if they asked him to get it back again. They asked him to speak first, so they pushed Beijing to the front. The Beijingers said
"Give me a bottle of Erguotou first." Boom, a bottle of Red Star Erguotou,
"Where's the other one?"
Beijing touched his head with wine and thought for a while. He didn't say anything for a long time. The French and Americans were both anxious and urged him to come.
"Speak quickly," the Beijinger suddenly said
"Well, I don't have anything else to do. You can go back." After a few seconds, the gods and demons went back. A man committed suicide and went to see God.
God asked: "My child, why did you kill yourself?"
The man said: "I pursued a woman, but she said I didn't have a tall and handsome figure and appearance, so I was rejected."
God nodded thoughtfully and said: "It's true, visual effects are very important in love. Let's do this, I will give you a beautiful shell that is unparalleled in the world, and you can go back and pursue your happiness now."
As God recited the incantation, there was a "whoosh" sound and the man left. A week later, the man committed suicide for the second time and came back and saw God again. God asked: "My child, why did you commit suicide again?"
"
The man said painfully: "After I went back, the woman said that although I was very handsome, I didn't understand her at all. I was rejected again."
God nodded understandingly: "Of course. If you don't understand a person, how can you know how to give her happiness? Well, I'll give you superhuman insight and intuition, and you can go back and pursue your happiness."
As God recited the incantation, there was a "swish" sound, and the man left again. A week later, the man came back again.
That was the third suicide.
God was very surprised and asked: "My child, why did you commit suicide again?" The man said in extreme pain: After I went back, although she was very handsome and knew her very well, she said that she had already taken away her body.
Dedicated to another man." God looked at this unfortunate man with sympathy,
Finally, he said: "Well, since you like that woman so much, I will let the man die. Then the woman will be yours. You can go back!"
As God recited the incantation, just halfway through the incantation, there was a "bang!" sound, and God fell to the ground, hard and dead. The man said happily: "Now I can finally go back and pursue that beautiful nun.
Got it!"
A patient with indigestion complained to the doctor: I have been very abnormal recently. I pooped whatever I ate. I ate cucumbers and pooped cucumbers and watermelons and pooped watermelons. How can I get back to normal? The doctor was silent for a moment, then you can only eat poop. Blind man rides
The driver of the car stuttered and looked at the road. Suddenly he saw a deep ditch and stuttered and exclaimed: Ditch, ditch, ditch!!!
The blind man sang back: "Oh Le Oh Le Oh Le!" So the two fell into the ditch. A swimming instructor was shopping in the mall. A beautiful lady greeted him. He looked closely and saw that it was one of his students.
He then said loudly: "You put on clothes, I really can't recognize you!" A drunk man accidentally fell from the third floor, attracting passers-by to watch. A policeman came over and asked: What happened? Drunk man: I don't know.
I just arrived too! On a dark and windy night, the longest and most dangerous road
On the way, the taxi driver passed by and there was a woman waving at the roadside and she got into the car. It was quiet all the way until the woman spoke. She said to the driver: "I'll give you an apple to eat. It's delicious."
Oh..." The driver thought it was great and took it, then took a bite. The woman asked:
"Is it tasty?"
The driver said: "It's delicious!"
The woman replied again: "I remember I also liked eating apples when I was alive..." Wow...amp;*$#@...When the driver heard this, he was so frightened that he rushed the car and turned pale... I saw that
The woman slowly tilted her head forward,
Said to the driver: "But I don't like eating after giving birth!..."
Teacher: Honestly, do you smoke?
Boy a: Don’t smoke.
Teacher: Don’t smoke? Well, let’s eat some French fries.
Boy a naturally stretched out his two fingers and took it...
Teacher: No? Call the parents...
[Scene 2] Teacher: Do you smoke?
Boy B: Don’t smoke.
Teacher: Don’t smoke? Well, let’s eat some French fries.
b After hearing what a said, he took the fries very carefully with his palm.
Teacher: Why don’t you dip it in ketchup?
b I accidentally dipped too much, so I immediately flicked it with my fingers...
Teacher: You are very skillful in flicking cigarette ashes. Call your parents...
[Scene 3] Teacher: Do you smoke?
Boy c: Don’t smoke.
Teacher: No, okay, let’s eat some French fries.
c Because of the previous two examples, I finished eating the fries very carefully and sweating.
Teacher: Why don’t you take the roots back to your classmates?
c After taking the fries, he easily clamped them on his ears...
Teacher: No? Call your parents...
[Scene 4] Teacher: Do you smoke?
Boy d: Don’t smoke.
Teacher: Very good. Let’s eat some French fries.
.d finished the French fries with fear.
Teacher: Why don’t you take the roots back to your classmates?
d carefully put the chips into his coat pocket.
The teacher suddenly shouted: The principal is here!
d Quickly took out the chips from his pocket and threw them on the ground, stepping on them with his feet...
Teacher: No? Call the parents...
[Scene 5] Teacher: Do you smoke?
Boys e: don’t suck,
Teacher: Very good, let’s eat some French fries.
e I just took the fries, and the teacher said, "Aren't you going to treat me to some?"
e quickly handed over the fries with both hands, and then took out the lighter...
Teacher: No? Call the parents...
[Scene 6] Teacher: Do you smoke?
Boy f: Don’t smoke.
Teacher: Very good, let’s eat some French fries.
f finished eating with fear.
Teacher: Suddenly he shouted: The principal is here!
f His palms were sweating, but he still lowered his head calmly and said: Hello, principal!
Teacher: The principal will smell your mouth.
f took out the French fries: No, they are still here, the fire is not even lit yet...
[Scene 7] Teacher: Do you smoke or not?
Boy g: Promise to God, I will never smoke.
Teacher: You really don’t want to smoke? Okay, let’s eat some potato chips.
g took the fries very naturally and ate them all.
Teacher: What a good boy. What brand of French fries do you usually like?
g (getting carried away): Greater China...[Scene 8]
Teacher: Let’s eat some French fries.
Boy n:Thank you, no.
teacher:……
"Haha" Si Zhe laughed and said, I also forced a smile
‘Mom, isn’t that funny?’ Si Leng said
'Hmm' I said
"Are you happy?" Si Zhe said
'Yeah' I nodded
"Then let's go play kite," said Si Leng.
'Okay then' I said
"Oou, let's go" Si Zhe, Si Leng pulled me and said