[69 Book Bar - www.] Ling Yansen did not move, his mouth was like a dried up river bed, "Mother, I want to know what Jiang Henhan's mother meant?"
Xu Suyun was a little excited, or a little guilty, "What do you mean?"
"Mother, stop pretending, you know what I'm talking about, you know the whole thing, tell me." Xu Suyun always felt that Ling Yansen's eyes seemed to be emanating from the cat's eyes, which symbolized darkness and terror, because of the light.
Like that.
"What did He Yi say?"
"The woman who is most likely my biological mother was originally named He Yi." Ling Yansen said this as if sighing, but his expression was indifferent, as if he was saying something that was none of his own business.
Xu Suyun was too lazy to go around with him. Although telling the truth in front of him would be very embarrassing for him and herself, it was impossible for him to be kept in the dark for the rest of his life.
The old housekeeper beside him has been shivering. He doesn't know whether it's because the sun has set and the temperature has dropped, or because of something else.
The three people stood like this, including the coffin lying quietly next to Xu Tianjue, who had long since disappeared.
"Ayan, you are not my child. You were born to He Yi. When He Yi and your father had a dispute, you were still young. I wonder if you still remember those days when I was tortured by your father."
Ling Yansen took a few steps back suddenly, unable to withstand the blow. If what he heard from the strange woman He Yi could at best be regarded as a kind of doubt about him, then the mother in front of him who he had worshiped for more than twenty years, her mouth
Every word he uttered was a kind of capital punishment for him. Fortunately, he had prepared before, and he was already prepared in his heart. He was so sad that he could no longer be sad again, or he was always in sadness and never got out.
Have left.
"Am I the child of my father and He Yi?" He murmured, his voice was very low, as heavy as a thousand pounds of pig iron, with unparalleled loneliness, and with a hint of last hope, he looked at Xu Suyun.
However, the obvious indifference and apology in Xu Suyun's dark eyes made Ling Yansen fall into the abyss again.
"No, Ayan, you are not from Ling Daguo. Things back then were complicated..."
When Xu Suyun slowly rewinded the tape and explained everything to Ling Yansen in detail, the smile on Ling Yansen's face could only be described as extremely bleak, or maybe he was not smiling, but was crying secretly with a smile on his face.
.
The sense of out-of-control panic that he felt he didn't belong came straight from the top of his head again.
Xu Suyun sighed, her throat a little dry, "You can blame anyone you want. This is not your fault, but it is attached to you and has been burdened on you for so many years. I have never given you any love. I hate you, look.
When I see you, I feel like I have seen He Yi. All the situations when your father betrayed me and He Yi were together. As long as I see you, I will uncontrollably think of you countless times, Ayan, do you understand? That is extremely painful.
It’s painful. I want to get rid of you desperately, but I have to relive the nightmare again and again because of you. So, I’m sorry for you. I can’t like you, let alone regard you as my own son, but you should be happy.
, your father doesn’t know the inside story. He loves He Yi deeply. Naturally, he loves Wu Jiwu. He also deeply loves you, whom he thinks he gave birth to. He treated you well when he was alive..."
"Mother, I'm not shocked at all that I'm not your child. When I was a kid, I brought you a full-score test paper when I came home to show it to you, but you didn't bother to give me a hand. You tried your best to do whatever you could and couldn't do just to please you.
You, you are either cold-eyed or sarcastic towards me. All these things, I have always suspected that you are my biological mother since I was sensible. When I was a child, I lived in a courtyard house, and I secretly listened to it when the aunt next door was chatting with other people.
, they were all saying that the second son of the Ling family was too beautiful to be born in their family. But I still persuaded myself to abandon this boring idea. I am from the Ling family, I am from the Ling family.
Second son, no matter what others say, no matter how you treat me, I have a father who is very good to me, an elder brother who always lets me go, and a younger brother who is close to me. This is enough. It is really enough.
.You always scold me for being gloomy and weird. I am not as clear-headed as my elder brother, nor as lively and kind as my younger brother. You say that I am like a monster. Mother, do you know? I am actually very naive. If I am not naive, I will not be.
I would be stupid enough to think that what you said is true. I have been living with your scolding for a long time, and I feel more and more that I am a weirdo. The reason why I am not favored by you is because of my withdrawn personality, so you will
Thinking back on it, in the second year of junior high school, for a whole year, I lived like a madman. I talked a lot, and my expressions were so fake that even my classmates avoided me. I helped many, many people, but I still never got you.
Such praise. So much so that when I think about it later, I always feel that this is probably my fate. I am destined to never get your love in this life."
Having said this, he murmured with a smile, that laughter was like a flower bone squeezed out from the cracks of a stone, forced and desperate, blind and enthusiastic, "Now that the truth is revealed, everything seems to be logical, and I have become
It’s a complicated thing that everyone shuns, despises, and fears. It’s not a human thing. I can’t even piece together a clear birth and growth..."
Xu Suyun admitted that sometimes she was just a bitch. She always regarded Ling Yansen as He Yi's clone, that's why she hated him so thoroughly.
But now, seeing him so lonely and sad, she couldn't bear to say cold and vicious words, as if every time he was sad, her hard heart would be cramped.
She was a little sad, "Don't talk about yourself like that, don't give up on yourself..."
Ling Yansen chuckled softly, and the laughter floated out from the wings of his nose. It had a rather gloomy and melancholy flavor, "Don't give up? I was completely beaten as early as the moment I was thrown by my biological father to my adoptive father."
The ultimate giving up. After so many years, mother gave up on me, then my eldest brother and father gave up on me, and finally Ah Wu also gave up on me. Will Duoduo also give up on me in some time?"
Xu Suyun felt that he seemed to be in a cage of despair. It was not that he could not get out, but that he never wanted to get out again.
Ling Daguo once said that He Yi was kind and weak and needed to be cared for. It seemed to imply that she was strong and domineering and did not need a man to care for her. Therefore, her man ran to protect other people's families without any guilt.
His wife is gone. Oh, He Yi's kindness and weakness are, in the final analysis, just a disguise to win the attention of men!
"Mom, it's getting cold, please go back."
Just like usual, Ling Yansen was expressionless and caring. He urgently needed to be alone for a while. He didn't want anyone to see his hysteria.