Both incidents left a very deep impression on Mustache that could never be erased for life. In other words, it was a kind of pain that was difficult to bear.
The first thing is that his father died. Their family situation was not good, and his father did not know how to run a business or make a living. He farmed a little bit of farmland and went to the mountains to collect some mountain products to make a living. His father was not in good health and was relatively weak when working.
Although his mother had scolded him countless times and told him not to do so much, his father always smiled faintly, picked up his own basket and headed into the mountain.
At that time, Mustache was very eager for his father to go into the mountains, because he knew that as long as he came back from the mountains, his father would sell the mountain goods and bring him some worthless gadgets. A few pieces of fruit candies, two books
Little People's Book, all the misty and colorful dreams of children in their childhood are actually woven like this.
However, this time, his father didn't come back after three days of absence. Xiaozhu's mother became anxious and took Xiaozhu into the mountains to look for her. In the end, what they found was a corpse. His father died, having fallen to death.
He lost his footing and fell from a cliff.
Mustache was only eight years old at the time, and he could not even clearly understand what death meant. But he saw the place where his father died. The body had been completely smashed into a human shape, and the surrounding stones were spattered with solidified blood.
It was like a sad painting that no one could draw. He forgot to shed tears and rushed directly to his father's side. When he held his father's cold and stiff hand tightly, he knew one thing, his father was dead.
, and will never live again.
This is the first time that Mustache has experienced the pain of loss. This kind of pain is unbearable and makes Mustache feel like he is about to suffocate from crying. He hates this feeling, and he vows never to face such a thing again.
lose.
This incident had a very, very big impact on him, even affecting his character and some of his principles of dealing with things as an adult. He does not accept anyone easily, but once he accepts the other person, it proves that he regards the other person as his own life
He is an extremely important part of the world. When faced with danger and one of the two people must die, he would rather risk his life to save the other person. Because the experience he had when he was eight years old made him extremely afraid of losing. He would rather die than live again.
Experience a loss.
The second thing was that two months after his father died, his aunt appeared.
Xiaozhu knew nothing about this aunt whom he had never met or even heard from his parents. He only knew that during the first month or two of his arrival, his aunt spent every day crying bitterly, loudly.
Crying, crying quietly, crying silently. Before his mother could get over the grief of losing her husband, something like this happened again. She couldn't do anything.
After his aunt calmed down, Xiaozhu finally knew what happened to her. He knew that his uncle had been killed and his cousin was missing. Although Xiaozhu was still very young at the time, he could understand his aunt's mood.
.
Because when he saw his father's body, he felt the same pain in his heart.
In Xiaozi's impression, his aunt had never smiled since she was a child, not even the faintest smile. The only thing she could do was sit in her room blankly for the whole day.
, holding a photo, looking at it by yourself, and crying by yourself.
At that time, the family situation was getting worse and worse. My mother had to go to work in the fields, and the 16-year-old Mustache also ran back and forth, but he was not just running around and playing like other children. He used a slingshot to shoot birds, just to make dinner.
If there is a little more meat in it, he will bring the meal to his aunt's room.
The cooked meat gave off a little fragrance. When his aunt put the bit of meat in the bowl to Xiao Hu, the ten-year-old man pursed his lips tightly and stepped back, saying that he was full. His aunt looked at him and silently
He put down the bowl, walked up to him, and gestured with his hands on the crook of his leg.
"If your brother were still alive now, he would be this tall..."
This scene happened countless times, and every time he mentioned it, he could detect the silent but heartbreaking pain in his aunt's eyes.
Every time he walked out with more than half a bowl of rice left, suppressed crying would come from the room behind him. Even though two years had passed, the crying still had not disappeared. Mustache knew
My aunt is pitiful and knows that some pain may never go away.
From this moment on, he hated those people who killed his uncle and took away his cousin. He walked slowly, looked back at the room where the crying came from, and swore to himself that one day,
He will clear everything up.
I don’t know if it was the successive changes in his family that made him learn something. He is much more mature and stable than his peers. Although he is as taciturn as his father, he is always used to thinking in silence. He doesn’t want to
If there is any loss, he wants to protect the people around him.
With this mentality, he began to sneak away to the far back mountain to find the old monk who was also lonely and weird. He was really a weirdo, but Mustache knew that this old monk was not simple. Although his beard
It's all white as snow, but it can break a small tree as thick as an arm with one punch.
It's unclear whether the old monk was thinking about his friendship with his father, or whether he really valued Xiao Hui as a person. In short, he took good care of him and taught him a lot. Xiao Hui has a perseverant character, and once he makes up his mind to do something
He doesn't hesitate to pay any price for anything. He feels that it will take a long, long time to become strong enough to face everything.
But the old monk shook his head. He said it didn't take too long. He only taught the mustache until he was twenty years old.
"You can learn your skills from anywhere, but not everyone can teach you some principles." Mustache took a sip of wine and said, "What he taught me was actually just a sentence."
That was a conversation that the old monk had with Xiaohu when he was a teenager. Because at this time, Xiaohu had already learned some family matters from his mother, and his mood was greatly disturbed. He did not know that he
What should you do when you are alone, and how should you do it? The old monk did not know the specific details, but he could detect the uneasiness of the mustache.
He did not give long lectures, but only told Mustache a very simple story. In other words, this was not a story, but a few sentences.
"The Buddha's heart is compassionate, and the devil's heart is evil. Doing good and doing evil are all out of the original intention. Acting with the original intention, saving people, killing people, are all merits and achieve positive results."
These are words that must have been remembered for half his life.
After another two or three years, Mustache finally understood the true meaning of what the old monk taught him when he first found this place. Because when he was twenty, the old monk passed away and lived with the old monk.
A few years ago, Lao Zhao left alone, leaving only Mustache alone.
He started his adventure, and from here he arrived in Nanjing. He was good at physical skills and good at using his brain, so although he was weak in power, his roots were gradually deepened. It was during this period that he gained a new understanding,
He felt that what he had to do was not just as simple as finding me. Because as long as the bronze medal incident did not end completely, the descendants of this family would be swept into it invisibly, and they would not be able to escape.
This is what he thought and did. From this moment on, all his efforts were to achieve this goal and completely end the big event.
Mustache drank wine and talked in great detail, almost all of his most important experiences since arriving in Nanjing. This kind of narration satisfied my curiosity, but also made me wonder more and more why he wanted to talk to me.
Say this?
I don’t understand the meaning of Mustache, and I am familiar with him, but no one can guess what is going on in his heart. Looking at his bronze face and the somewhat dazzling scar, I know that he left this time.
What happened during this period of time. But I really can’t figure it out. What happened? The look in Mustache’s eyes changed?
He talked about it since he was a child until he met me, and then he stopped. It was almost dawn, and the two of us drank a lot of wine. It was only then that I noticed another emotion in his eyes, this kind of emotion.
His emotions were unprecedented in the past, including when he was seriously injured and about to die.
It was a kind of exhaustion, exhaustion from the heart, as if a person suddenly experienced everything he should experience.
"Are you tired?" I asked, "Anyway, you are back and you have plenty of time. We can chat at any time. You should rest first and sleep well for three days. You will be able to recover after taking care of yourself."
Mustache shook his head silently. I couldn't persuade him, and I didn't know what to say. There started to be silence between the two of them. After a while, I asked him: "By the way, what do you want me to do for you?"
"We'll talk about that later. I've been away for three years, right?" Mustache patted the bag containing photos and notebooks, and said, "Tell me about the past three years. I've written down some things.
You can listen and watch at the same time.”
"You tell me, I'll listen." I was a little sleepy at first, but I just tried to cheer up, but when Mustache wanted to talk about what happened in the past three years, I rubbed my face vigorously to drive away the tiredness. I felt that if I understood him
If you look at his experiences during this period, you will know exactly what caused him to undergo such seemingly subtle but earth-shaking changes.
I know very well the reason why Mustache left at that time. He wanted to find the roots of his family. However, when he told me at the time, he did not regard this purpose as the main reason for leaving. He said that he was used to a wandering life and had no
Roots, just go where you want to go.
I listened carefully to his narration, which moved me a little.