Guan Xichen took Tang Ruotian back to the place where she used to live. Tang Ruotian had no objection. There were some things she had been avoiding saying. Now that she saw him, she would speak clearly.
After entering the room, Guan Xichen suddenly reached out and hugged Tang Ruotian.
Tang Ruotian was stunned by his sudden action, and subconsciously wanted to resist.
Guan Xichen buried his face in her neck and whispered: "Tiantian, don't move. Just let me hold you like this for a while, just for a while."
He had to make sure that she was back now and returned to him intact.
Tang Ruotian closed her eyes and smelled the familiar scent coming from him.
Once upon a time, his embrace was her most trusted harbor.
Sometimes she wonders, if she had not met Gu Yunqing, would she have been with Guan Xichen?
Now that I think about it, the answer is no.
Guan Xichen is still nostalgic for the past, but she has moved forward.
Guan Xichen hoped that she would still be the girl who could act coquettishly to him and let him dote on her. But with the tempering of time, she was no longer the girl who knew nothing and only knew how to ask for everything from him.
In his mind, the shock flashed through Guan Xichen's eyes when he saw her slap Gu Yunming hard and shoot Gu Yunming in the leg.
She already knew clearly that she and Guan Xichen could not go back.
"I'm sorry." After a while, she said quietly.
"I said, you never have to say sorry to me." Guan Xichen gently held her hair. The hair that originally reached her waist was now short. He stroked her hair with some pity.
"Xichen, if I don't say sorry to you, I will feel even more guilty." She is very selfish and knows how to make Guan Xichen accept her apology.
She pushed Guan Xichen's arms away, took a step back slightly, raised her chin, and looked at the man quietly.
This man spent her entire girlhood with her and gave her an unforgettable first love.
This man was once the man she wanted to marry the most, the man she had loved for ten years and hated for three years.
After meeting him again, she still hated him. She knew that he felt guilty for leaving her without saying goodbye because of three years of separation. She also knew that he still loved her, so she used him despicably.
Asking him to help her escape from Gu Yunqing, when she fell in love with Gu Yunqing, she never thought about him.
When she found out that Gu Yunqing's love was just a scam, she came back selfishly and used him to take revenge on Gu Yunqing, making him a topic of discussion in City A.
She was really sorry for him.
"I'm sorry, I'm really sorry..." she murmured.
The three words she hates most now are sorry.
The three words "I'm sorry" are actually the three words that make people feel the most powerless.
Because I couldn't take any actual actions to express my apology or guilt, I could only say these three words.
"Tiantian..." Guan Xichen saw Tang Ruotian's eyes looking at him. Those eyes contained too many things - nostalgia, nostalgia, farewell, and even more of apologies.
The last thing he wanted was to see her apology.
Tang Ruotian intercepted his words and said, "Xichen, can you let me finish my sentence? Now I really don't have the face to say anything else to you except I'm sorry. I'm sorry for all the things I've done these days.
I apologize to you. I'm sorry. Can you forgive me?"
Originally, she had found out that the matter of Guan's fake perfume was related to Gu Yunqing. When she learned the truth from Claudia, she selfishly prayed to Guan Xichen not to tell Gu Yunqing and Guan's fake perfume.
Everything happened to Guan Zhihao.
She is really selfish.
He never felt that there was anything she did that she could not do to forgive him.
But looking at her expectant eyes, he smiled bitterly in his heart and said solemnly: "Okay, I forgive you."
This is what she wants to hear most. No matter what he thinks in his heart, it doesn't matter. What matters is that as long as she wants it and as long as he has it, then he will give it to her.
Nothing else matters.
His current health is not good, and even if he undergoes surgery, there is still a possibility of recurrence.
Guan Xichen lowered his head and looked at the distance between him and her, just one step away.
Closer than friends, farther than lovers.
He was thinking bitterly in his heart that if he had a healthy body, maybe he wouldn't stay in such an embarrassing situation.
He couldn't advance. He couldn't bear to retreat.
Looking at the smile on her face, this smile was what he cherished the most. When he was enduring the pain of chemotherapy in the United States, this smile accompanied him through the pain of chemotherapy and was the source of his dreams.
Suddenly, he had the urge to put aside all reason and took a step forward, while his girl took a step back as if she was frightened.
His hands held the slender shoulders, and there was fanaticism in his eyes, like the fanaticism that burned everything, "Tiantian, don't leave me! Let's get married and be together, okay? Have you forgotten? You once wanted to marry the most.
I am the one, let’s treat it as if there is no difference in these three years, and there is no Gu Yunqing’s involvement, how about we get married?”
"Xichen, it's impossible for us." Tang Ruotian said harshly.
"I am now pregnant with Gu Yunqing's child..."
"This is not a problem, I can regard this child as mine. Let's get married!"
Tang Ruotian bit her lip, a look of embarrassment appeared on her face.
But that embarrassment was like a sharp sword, stabbing Guan Xichen's eyes with pain.
What he couldn't bear the most was her embarrassment.
But this time he knew she was in trouble, but he still wanted to force her.
He couldn't let her go. He knew that it was despicable to ask her now, but he still couldn't let her go.
He couldn't bear to give up the opportunity to spend his life with her.
This is the only chance.
"Xichen, I'm sorry." She whispered.
"I can't marry you."
"Why? Are you still thinking about Gu Yunqing? Gu Yunqing is about to marry Shangguan Minyue! If he really cares about you, how could he still abandon you and marry another woman even though he knows you have a child?" Guan Xichen
It has never been so harsh.
"Did you see him coming to save you today and you concluded that he still has you in his heart? Tiantian, don't be so naive! Don't you understand Gu Yunqing's methods? He just doesn't want you to die, he
I want you to live well and live in worry, fear, and guilt every day. Even if he comes to save you, it’s just for the child in your belly!”
"Stop talking!" Tang Ruotian said loudly.
The corners of his eyes were moist.
"I know, I know everything you said. But so what? I know he just wants to torture me. Before I knew I killed his parents and brothers, I hated him every day, but
The more I hate, the more I love. After knowing the truth, I found that I was not even qualified to hate him. I also knew that since he was willing to let me go, I should be more unrestrained, abort the child in my belly, and find a man to talk to.
Fall in love and live a good life. But I can’t do it!”
"Guan Xichen, I also feel so cheap! Do you know that after I left him, I miss him every day here." She stroked her heart with her hand.
She looked a little dazed, and her sharp voice lowered, "I wonder if he has eaten well? Is he drinking so hard? Is he really willing to risk his own happiness for revenge? Is he still there?
It’s okay to miss me even for a minute.”
Her voice became lower and lower, until finally it was almost inaudible.
She raised her head and looked into Guan Xichen's complicated eyes. She smiled bitterly and said, "Look, I'm just so worthless."
She sniffed and whispered: "How can I marry you like this?"
Even if she is like this, he still wants her.
Tang Ruotian seemed to have penetrated her thoughts. She wrinkled her nose and looked a bit more playful than before, "Don't say that you want me to do this. Guan Xichen, you know, if I really stay with you,
I'm not happy around you, and you won't be happy either. The last thing you want to see is that I'm unhappy, right?"
In the last sentence, she rarely showed a bit of willfulness.
Guan Xichen's eyes flickered, looking at the girl who smiled lightly at him, he really realized this time that he and she really could not go back.
"Are you just going to be left alone like this, and then live your whole life alone with the memories of you and Gu Yunqing? Tiantian, I can't bear to do it." Guan Xichen had already subdued the enthusiasm just now, and looked at her with doting eyes.
Tang Ruotian was stunned. Didn't Guan Xichen understand what she meant?
Guan Xichen raised his hand and rubbed her hair, acting affectionately but not ambiguously.
"Silly girl, what are you thinking about? Do you still think that we can do nothing but be lovers?"
Tang Ruotian blinked her eyes, looking like she didn't know how to deal with it.
Guan Xichen sighed slightly and whispered: "You still love Gu Yunqing, don't you?"
Looking at his understanding look, Tang Ruotian opened her eyes and said, "It doesn't matter whether you love her or not, he and I can't be together anymore."
Guan Xichen chuckled, laughing at Tang Ruotian's duplicity.
It was obvious that just now she told him that she loved Gu Yunqing.
Now I say it doesn't matter whether I love you or not.
"Tiantian, you see, a person's life only lasts a few decades. Since you still love Gu Yunqing, what are you thinking about? Take him back. Be brave and fight for yourself and him to be together for once.
opportunity.”
After Guan Xichen said this, he turned around and walked out. The smile on his face had disappeared, but there was still a smile in his voice, "Tiantian, I wish you happiness."
He stepped out of the door and stepped out into the world that belonged to Tang Ruotian.
As soon as he stepped out of the room, uncontrollable pain hit him. He suddenly vomited a large mouthful of blood. Looking at the blood between his fingers, he suddenly realized what he had given up when he gave up so easily three years ago.
.
He gave up the girl he cherished most and left his world.
Now, he doesn't even have the chance to have her.
Guan Xichen looked at the vast night and chuckled.
The low laughter echoed in the night for a long time.