Since I am an online writer, I am certainly no stranger to tomb robbing. I have read both Grave Robbery Notes and Ghost Blowing Lamp. I even followed the trend and wrote a tomb robbing novel called "Mystery in the Game" because of the proliferation of tomb robbing novels. Popular, the tomb robber who was originally despised by thousands of people suddenly wore a veil of mystery, but how does the novel compare with reality? They are holding a Luoyang shovel, and I am a shovel for cleaning cesspits, how can they compare? Let’s talk about the hand in my hand. I don't even have black donkey hooves, what should I do if I encounter a zombie? Moreover, tomb robbing is always illegal and damages one's moral character. I am not ready to change my career and become a tomb robber.
I asked Master, what should I do now?
He himself is a non-smoker, but because of what happened today he reached out to me and said: Give me another one.
I hurriedly handed it over and lit it for him. He sat on the ground and looked at the coffin in the pit. As the cigarette butt burned, I could even see his frown. When the cigarette burned to the butt of the cigarette, he suddenly took the He took out his turtle shell copper coins and scattered them on the ground.
Enemy! At the critical moment, ask God! Master is really a great wisdom!
After Master finished the divination, I hurried up and asked: Master, what did the Jade Emperor say?
He shook his head, looked inside the coffin with a solemn expression, and said: Judging from the lot, both financial and disaster accounts for half, wealth and wealth are found in danger, and it's open!
As soon as I heard that we were both responsible for half of the financial disaster, I felt uneasy, so I said to Master: How about forgetting it? If I write a novel, at least we will not starve to death, and maybe one day we will become a great god and make a fortune, no? It is necessary to do this kind of thing.
At this time, he became more ferocious and said: Do it! It’s already like this, if you don’t do it, it’s for nothing!
Seeing that he was like this, I could only say okay. I went down to drive, but he pushed me away and said: I can do this kind of thing as an old man. Even if I lose my life, I will only have a few more years to live. , you are young, don’t do anything.
I wanted to argue with him, but he glared at me and cursed: Am I the master or are you the master?!
He jumped down into the pit, patted the coffin, and said to himself: Madam or gentleman inside, I'm sorry to disturb your rest today, but let me tell you the truth, money is something external to the body, and this thing is down there. It's not in circulation either. Today, we will support our master and apprentice. Tomorrow I will ask my apprentice to burn billions of ghost coins for you. Don't blame me.
The coffin was brand new. The master found a corner, slowly inserted the tip of the shovel, and began to pry slowly. As soon as he pried it, a hissing sound came from inside, and the master suddenly jumped out of the pit. I jumped out and was shocked, but the master waved his hand and said: It's okay, the coffin is well sealed, and the dead energy inside is not a big deal.
He opened my backpack, used the remaining strips of my shirt that had begun to tear, sprinkled mineral water on it, and made a simple gas mask. He waited until the sound of air leaking inside stopped, then jumped in to pry the loose end. , until one end was loose enough, he inserted the shovel in and used the principle of leverage to move the entire coffin board.
There was a crunch, and the black turtle and I stuck our heads out at the same time and looked into the coffin through the gap. The light from the torch filtered through the gap, and I saw a woman's face inside, pale and pale, with her eyes open. look at me.
I yelled and lost consciousness instantly.
After that, I started to have a very deep and complicated dream. It started with a very beautiful woman, with an oval face and willow-leaf eyebrows. She asked me why I wanted to dig her grave, and I said I didn’t want to dig her grave, it was that damn tortoise. She lied to me. Her originally beautiful face suddenly started to bleed from all her orifices, and she shouted, "I don't care, it's your life!"
I clearly knew this was a dream, but I couldn't wake up, not even if I was alive. I wanted to bite my tongue to wake myself up, but I found that I couldn't even move my tongue!
Seeing that she was about to rush towards me, I suddenly knelt down to her, hugged her thigh and cried: Sister Fairy, I really didn’t mean to dig up your coffin. I will kill that damn bastard when I see it. I grabbed the stew and drank it. I'm burning paper money, carriages, and horses for you. Anyway, can you tell me what you want? Please don't kill me.
I know I'm a coward like this, but was this a dream? No one saw it. I never thought that in a dream, I begged a female ghost for mercy and not to kill me, but she actually stopped strangling me. , and restored that beautiful face, and asked me: Do you really don’t want to die?
I quickly nodded like a man pounding garlic and said: Of course, as long as you don’t kill me, you can do whatever you ask me to do.
I raised my head again, only to see that what was once a beautiful woman suddenly turned into two, and the two looked about 70% similar. One was colder, while the other looked more gentle. The cold one said to me: You don't have to die. Who made my stupid sister fall in love with you? If you marry her, I will let you go.
Almost instantly, I thought of a book - Liaozhai. I thought in my dream, could it be that I had also met the legendary hungry female ghost and wanted to have a romantic relationship with the female ghost like that scholar?
Dude, you are totally not ready!
Seeing my hesitation, the cold female ghost immediately pounced on me and shouted: If you don't want to, just go and die!
I quickly raised my hands and surrendered, saying: I do! I can’t ask for more!
As soon as the scene changed, I was attending an ancient wedding, and the groom was myself! Needless to say, the bride, even though she was covered with a hijab, I could guess that she was the more gentle sister.
The wedding attendees were all extremely pale people, and they were all drinking and eating meat stiffly. There were both meat and vegetables on their tables, but without exception, the main dish in the middle was, They are all bloody heads!
My legs were shaking, but I had to pretend to be strong and pretend that I was a ghost, because I was afraid that they would suddenly tear me apart and eat me.
Worshiping Heaven and Earth, the person worshiping was a man wearing an official uniform from the Ming Dynasty. He had a Chinese character and a face. He looked quite majestic, but he was also smiling at this time. The woman was also a graceful and noble woman with a kind face.
It seemed that my father-in-law and mother-in-law were doing well. I felt a little more at ease. After praying to heaven and earth, of course I sent them to the bridal chamber.
When I was alone with this woman, I wasn't afraid at all. I didn't know whether it was because she was my bride who had worshiped heaven and earth or because she was too gentle. I gently lifted her red hijab, and her face was full of fear. He was so red that he didn't even dare to look up at me.
I thought to myself, now I have really made a damn profit! When a woman in ancient times got married, she must be a virgin. Now if you want to find a virgin, where can you find it?
I kissed her lips, and what followed was a very erotic dream. I have never found that a woman can be so gentle as water. Although it was a dream, I have to say that I got the feeling from her. I felt extremely satisfied. At that moment, I even thought that I could continue to dream this dream and live with her forever.
After the wedding, I had to go out to toast with the guests. The bride told me that this was the rule, so I held up the wine jar and went from table to table. At the first table, they were very enthusiastic towards me and insisted on pulling me along. I sat down and kept picking up food for me. I saw one of them stretch out his chopsticks, pick up a piece of meat from that person's head, tear it off, put it to my mouth, and said drunkenly: Groom Officer! Eat!
I felt sick when I looked at the bloody meat. I tried to hide my head, but waved my hands and said, "I don't eat meat! I only eat vegetarian food."
But at this time, all the guests and countless little devils surrounded me and shouted to me: Eat! Eat! Eat! If you don’t eat, we will eat you!!
I gritted my teeth and bit down on the piece of meat. In an instant, the smell of blood filled my mouth with a fishy smell. I couldn't help it anymore and vomited.
This time I vomited, I really woke up, and I really lay on the edge of the bed and vomited, because even if I woke up, the feeling of raw human flesh being chewed by my teeth still felt like it was really in my body. Swirling in my head.
A hand kept patting my back. After I vomited, a small hand handed me a towel. I looked back and realized that this was the Northeastern girl I met before who was holding a lantern. .
In the daytime, although she was not particularly stunning, she looked very small and exquisite. But again, when she opened her mouth, it would destroy her whole body. She patted me hard on the back and hummed. : You are finally awake!
Because my dream was too complicated, mixed with horror and romance, it took me a while to really return from the dream to reality. The first thing I said when I opened my mouth was: Girl, have you met my master?!
She curled her lips and said: "Your master? Is that the old man? He probably hasn't woken up yet and is lying in the town hospital. The medical expenses are my dowry. Now that you are awake, you have to pay it to me."
As soon as I heard that he was sent to the hospital, I felt a little relieved and said yes, I will compensate you. Is he okay?
The girl said: Oh, that's right. Don't you see that you are quite filial? You never leave your master. The doctor said that the problem is probably not serious. He checked and said that there is nothing wrong with the body, but he still can't wake up.
I was really relieved when he said this. Medically speaking, as long as it's okay, it may have been tampered with by the female ghost when opening the coffin. Just find a Taoist priest to explain it, right?
When I thought of opening the coffin, I thought of the tomb robbery before I fell into coma, so I tentatively asked: Beauty, where am I now?
She looked at me with a proud smile and said: Don't worry, this is my home, not the police station. I said boy, can't you tell that you are still a tomb robber?
I quickly covered her mouth and said: Don't talk nonsense, I am an honest person, how can I be a tomb robber!
She opened my hand and said with a chuckle: "You are still pretending to me. You are lucky. It was me who discovered you. If others had seen you, they would have sent you to the police station."
After I fell into coma that day, I couldn’t remember anything else, so I asked: Thank you beautiful woman. I’ll treat you to dinner another day to thank you for not killing her. By the way, can you tell me what happened?
The girl said carelessly: "What else can happen? I saw you in the cemetery that day. Maybe I slept for a while before, but after I came back, I couldn't sleep. Just when I felt a little sleepy, I heard your scream again. I still
I thought you idiot had lost your way to the cemetery again, so I got up and went out to take a look. After walking for a while, I saw the light of sparks over there, as if the torch was about to go out. I walked over and took a look, you two
You all died next to the coffin! Fortunately, I am brave enough to find out that neither of you is dead after checking your breathing, so I called my dad to carry you back.
I asked: Beauty, when you saw us, my master and I were both unconscious. Did you see anything in that coffin?
She waved her hands and said, "I really don't understand what scared you two. It's just an empty coffin inside! There's not even a fart in it!"