046: Inside the open door is what they have never confessed
"I hate it so much. I have never been able to truly let go of my brother's death and that person's betrayal. I just lied to myself and ignored it! I hate them!"
Looking at the sad and crying person in his arms, Nan Muli felt his heart twisting again.
How long has it been? He has almost forgotten the feeling of sadness, and he has even forgotten what tears taste like. But this little woman has repeatedly brought back these feelings in him that should have disappeared long ago.
"Everything will be fine. Don't be too harsh on yourself. I like to see you happy and smiling." So pure, so clean and beautiful, it seems that seeing her can purify the darkness in his heart.
The thunder outside the window gradually faded away, and the sound of rain gradually became quieter.
The roaring night gradually became quiet. After an unknown amount of time, Xia Baoer's mood gradually stabilized.
Looking up at the man who had been accompanying her all this time, she felt embarrassed. She was also secretly surprised that she mentioned this matter to him so naturally.
After her brother's death, this topic was taboo in their family, and she swore she would never mention it again.
"How did you..., I'm sorry, I..." She hung her head in embarrassment, and uncomfortably tugged at his tear-stained collar.
Alas, now he must be furious with himself again.
"No need to say sorry!" He raised her chin, forcing her to look up to him, and said firmly: "You are not allowed to hide in front of me at any time. I like to confess the truth about you, no matter what,
I won’t even be happy.”
Blinking her big, bright eyes moistened by tears in confusion, Xia Baoer's thoughts were once again blurred by his overbearing words.
But she was too lazy to delve into it. Anyway, he was such an arrogant and domineering man with a cold and sometimes gentle appearance. He would not hurt her, and that was enough.
Looking up at him, her neck felt a little sore. She twisted her body in his arms and moved higher, aligning her little face with his. She put a hand under her ear, stared at him and asked: "You always do this to me?
What about you? You never let me know anything about you. It’s unfair that I’ve been a complete stranger to you for so long except for knowing your name!”
"Um?"
She glared at him and complained unhappily: "I never heard you say anything about yourself. There are only servants and housekeepers in this villa. Where are the rest of your family and parents?"
Strange words were like taboos, making Nan Muli's eyes look cold.
And Xia Bao'er also noticed that as soon as she finished asking, his expression suddenly turned gloomy.
Did she say something she shouldn't have said or ask something she shouldn't have asked? He...
"Dead!" Nan Muli said this with no emotion on his face. He was cold and indifferent, and his whole body was full of strangeness that no one could get close to.
"Ah? Sorry!" She looked at him in astonishment, not knowing what to say.
Nan Muli's eyes were cold and his tone was emotionless. He lowered his eyes indifferently and said calmly: "When I was very young, they all didn't want me."
When he was very young, he must have been very sad and lonely after being alone for so many years and having such a cold personality that he did not allow others to get close to him.
Looking at his cold face, she felt indescribably sad, and felt vaguely flustered. She couldn't help but stretched out her hands to hug his back, frowned at him and said firmly: "Don't use this kind of thing, it doesn't matter."
If you speak in your own tone, if you cry and vent when you are sad, I won't laugh at you, really."
When people are sad, they have to let the venom flow away, so that they can see the light more clearly and have a bright future, right?
"I am a burden. They don't need me, so they choose to die together, leaving me alone in the cold world. No one cares about me anyway, and I don't need anyone anymore." The following words seemed to be extreme.
He was angry, his eyebrows were sad, but the corners of his mouth were pursed so stubbornly to prevent his emotions from leaking out.
"Don't deny this willfully! Every child is the meat that fell from the mother's body, and is the treasure of the parents. They may not want you, but want to protect you to survive!" Although I don't know the relationship between him and his parents.
What kind of misunderstanding was there? But they left him in this world because they wanted him to live well. They didn't want him to accompany them to the cold underground world at such a young age.
Nan Muli suddenly smiled sarcastically, making Xia Baoer at a loss.
"No, I'm a bastard. They hate me and don't want me!" He said without emotion, as if he was staying out of the matter. Only when he cares too much and is extremely sad can he say it as if he is talking about other people's affairs.
Looking at him blankly, she didn't understand, but she could feel his pain.
It was like a thin invisible silk thread was wrapping around her heart little by little, tightening and tightening, making it indescribably uncomfortable. She felt the tension in his muscles, and her body temperature seemed to have dropped a few degrees, and it was extremely cold.
His handsome face is as if covered with ice.
The more calm and distant he was, the more frightened she felt. Her body trembled, and when her hand touched his, the chilling cold feeling almost froze her.
Feeling anxious, she yanked his stiff palms, wrapped them with her warm little hands, rubbed them and breathed, as if she wanted to use her own body temperature to drive away his coldness.
He said that he liked her warm body. If she warmed him like this, she would definitely not make him so sad and lonely.
"Your hands are so cold, what's wrong with you? Don't scare me like this, don't show such desperate eyes, okay? I'm afraid..." Worried, she warmed his hands and spoke incoherently.
The soft warmth seeped into his palm bit by bit, and Nan Muli let her hold his palm in her palm with no expression on her face, and smiled.
His brain forgot to work for a moment, and he just looked at her cute little heart-shaped face strangely. Unknowingly, the memories he had hidden away were dug up.
The corners of his mouth were slightly opened, and after testing several times, the unspeakable words slowly came out of his mouth.
"That bastard often beat her, and his mother called her a bitch, a shameless slut..." Narrating in a low voice, Nan Muli's eyes gradually became empty. Only the picture in his mind was particularly clear and profound.
The memory is being rewinded back to that miserable childhood.
Those pieces of his childhood...
"Get out! You shameless bitch, get out and find your wild man. Don't bring this bastard even a step into this house."
When he was young, he often heard sounds like breaking glass, and his eyes were full of small, sharp pieces of porcelain flying everywhere. The dark living room soon became extremely embarrassing in front of him.
Normally, his mother would hold him in her arms and bear the beatings and abuses from men, but this time she opened the door, and the wind blew up her flowing skirt and messed up her long hair. She no longer protected him, but left...
…
"Mommy, Mommy, don't go...don't leave me..."
He remembered how he cried piercingly and clenched his mother's hand tightly. But like trash, she pushed him down mercilessly in disgust, and then disappeared from his sight.
