"Never take the initiative to attack a mage tower that has an owner, and don't overestimate the moral limits of a mage. Unless you want to be like me, I have twelve serial mechanisms, so you are not afraid of killing yourself. As expected, all mages are lunatics——
The Great Adventurer James."
In a sense, this motto has become an iron rule for adventurers, especially this great adventurer who is famous all over the world for his style and escape ability. During an adventure in a floating city in an alien plane, he was killed by a great arcanist.
The chain mechanism was broken down into thirteen pieces, and he used his life to make the final annotation for his motto, which added to the persuasiveness of the motto.
Creatures like mages often pursue the pursuit of truth and knowledge throughout their lives, and their residences and mage towers are their research institutes and treasure houses.
Therefore, when their research results and lives are threatened, their lower limits and moral integrity are extremely low. Their homes and laboratories are full of various traps and mechanisms, and they are also magic traps that even a big thief can't do, such as opening
It is very possible for a door to be randomly thrown into another world.
The legendary archmage's residence and mage tower are no less threatening than the dragon's lair, and the weakest lich is at least a legend.
So, I was very curious about who would directly attack a lich's house, especially when the lich was obviously still at home.
"Eliza?"
"...Two teams of intruders, one team attacking and restrained from the front, and one team climbing over the wall from the side. Based on their skills and the weapons they carry, they should all be dark elves, seven silver-level, three
Gold level, it’s a very luxurious lineup.”
Eliza's return was as expected, but that's not what I wanted to ask.
"Why did it explode? Didn't I say that some safe and quiet warning facilities should be installed around the perimeter? If it exploded so loudly at night, the city management will come soon."
According to the requirements of the "Urban Management Code of Action (Sleepless Revised Sixth Edition)", when they hear a violent explosion, they will form a team to investigate the site within five minutes, and my place happens to be in the central area of Sulfur Mountain City, not far away.
The Supreme Court is not far away, and they will arrive in at least ten minutes.
"They will definitely take the opportunity to conduct a big search on us! Won't the contraband in our basement suffer!?"
The urban management department only has the power to enforce the law on site. If they want to search someone else's house, they must wait for a search warrant issued by the superior authority. The superior unit of the urban management department is the Law Enforcement Department, and the superior unit of the law enforcement department is the Supreme Court. But how could I sign a search warrant myself and release the urban management department?
Come search my house...
Yes, from the beginning, what I worried about was not the intruders, but the corrupt officials and unscrupulous businessmen who dared not call the police when their illegal gains were stolen. If the city management took the opportunity to enter my old house to investigate, I'm afraid,
I'll be thrown directly into Sulfur Mountain Prison.
After hearing my complaints, Eliza still had that poker face.
"Yes, don't you want a 'safe' anti-theft system? According to your requirements, the peripheral layout is just some engineering early warning robots."
"Then why did it explode?" Then, when I heard the emphasis on "safety", I suddenly understood.
"'Safe?' You can't tell me which safe-brand goblin machine shop is on Gold Coin Street? Is that owned by the Bea brothers?"
Of course I know that store. That safety brand Goblin Equipment store has had its business license revoked several times due to selling fake goods and explosives. It should still be operating without a license.
Of course, they chose this store name just to deceive people. It is true that some people bought the wrong "safe goblin products", but after several accidents, where would people buy them? This brand has also become a negative example.
"Of course, I thought that was because you were planning to take care of your brothers. Where did you specifically ask me to purchase them?"
"They are not my brothers! What's the use of their things besides exploding? I'm crazy to let you buy them from!"
"Sorry, I misunderstood what you meant."
Although the maid apologized sincerely, from the slight curve of the corner of her mouth, I knew that this sultry half-demon was secretly proud, and she must have done it on purpose!
"I...well, I'm convinced. You've put in a lot of effort to torment me."
"As long as you pay off your salary, I guarantee that your life will be smooth sailing in the future."
"Hmph, don't even think about it. You think I don't know what you devils do. Paying off your salary means the contract is over and you want to be free? Don't think about it."
During the chat, the two teams were getting closer and closer, but I still didn't take it to heart.
"Have you found out the identity of the intruder? If you haven't yet, I will cut off your funds. Huh, don't think that I don't know that you embezzled funds and used them to buy your own things. You are so old, and you still like those light and fluffy things.
The clothes, hum, the iron virgin in the lace skirt? You need my pocket money to buy a doll..."
Halfway through the irony, I could no longer say it. The black mist of resentment, which seemed to be the essence of it, kept reminding me that I would be in bad luck in a few days. For example, the half-written experimental diary was suddenly blown away by the strong wind, and the supplies in the energy pool were inexplicably lost.
turned into dog food, the grease used to clean and care for bones suddenly turned into natural asphalt, urban management officials fell from the sky halfway through daily work, and the justice's robes worn to work suddenly had more lace and cartoon patterns...
.... Thinking of this, a kind of sadness fell from the sky. Who is the master and who is the servant? Do I really want to consider paying her salary and letting her get out!
"Boom!!"
Another huge explosion interrupted my thoughts.
"What is this? A land mine? You actually bought this thing and put it in the garden!" I took the opportunity to attack. "Humph, you disobeyed orders and violated our contract. I will take this opportunity to deduct another ten years of her salary."
"...That location should be the Goblin fully automatic sprinkler T130."
"Boom!!"
"This way? Lawnmower?"
"No, it should be the entrance. The doorbell is 'Daesang-kun'?" The girl tilted her head and pretended to be natural.
"Sure enough, it's loud enough. Fortunately, I never ring the doorbell... No, you even bought a safety card for the doorbell. Are you planning to get rich or kill yourself?"
"Boom!!" "Boom!!" This time, there were a series of explosions. I knew that all the floors in the entrance hall needed to be replaced. No, judging from the intensity of the explosion, maybe it was time to replace the entrance hall in my old house.
"This is? Shoe cabinet?"
Eliza nodded sadly. "Safe brand fully automatic shoe cabinet XT-137. It is said that it can help the owner automatically select shoes, brush shoes, and apply shoe polish..."
I couldn't help but secretly feel lucky that I was a lich, that I walked by floating on my feet and never wore shoes, but then, I felt something was wrong.
"No, I didn't buy any shoes, why are you buying a shoe cabinet?"
"Ah? Sir, it was really my negligence."
"Is it an oversight in the murder layout? Your word games are getting better and better."
"That's because you have trained me well."
"Hey, the evil points have increased again. It seems that another one has been killed... I hope those intruders are still alive. At least they can enter the next experimental area and help me test the spell trap I set."
Elenita is the second daughter of the noble third family of Menzoberranzan, and she became the Gold-level High Priest of Ross before she was two hundred years old, which further symbolizes that she is deeply favored by the Spider Mother. As the leader of Menzoberranzan,
A rising star, she has become accustomed to looking at people through her nostrils.
This time, she was led by her family to carry out a diplomatic mission in Sulfur Mountain City. After careful consideration and investigation, she confirmed that it was not a conspiracy set up by a priestess in the family for her own sake, so she happily accepted the mission.
"Stupid, dirty bipedal bugs, despicable men, how dare you refuse the Spider Queen's kindness! Well, don't you even have the qualifications to be a slave? Let me regret my decision in the fire of the abyss."
Even as a diplomatic envoy, she still looked down upon creatures other than female dark elves, like most of her kind, so there was no chance of success in diplomatic and trade negotiations from the beginning.
But as dark elves, the spy missions that naturally come with them have only just begun.
"You guys, go and fulfill the tasks given by the Spider Queen. Assassinate all the characters on this list who can be assassinated. If you can't do it for the time being, collect intelligence."
Therefore, these days the urban management brigade receives complaints about fellow dark elves wandering around the city, and they themselves fall into a passive position.
"Those bitches who wear ridiculous uniforms and believe in the Holy Light, seeing those idiots who betrayed the Spider Queen makes me sick to my stomach... As long as we take the opportunity to get rid of them, the Spider Queen will definitely give more rewards!
"
But for Ellenita, performing the family's spy mission is just incidental. The real goal is to let the subordinates sent by the family fight for her and gain more benefits for herself.
But before she had time to cause trouble to her weird fellows who believed in the Holy Light, a partner from Karon City was unexpectedly arrested.
"Stupid male, he died because he was too stupid and too weak, but if he said something, it would be really big trouble. If the city of Brimstone Mountain got caught, the diplomatic corps of Menzoberranzan would be expelled collectively.
Not to mention embarrassing, the reconnaissance and assassination missions failed at the same time, and if our secret is discovered by the other party..."
Thinking of the family's torture of the losers, the Spider Queen's punishment of the weak, turning into a half-human, half-spider monster... Elenita couldn't help but tremble all over.
But fortunately, the wise spider mother was still looking after her, and the mark she left on the man actually showed that he was taken away from the impenetrable volcanic prison and brought to this strange old house.
Even though he heard that this was the residence of a lich, he didn't flinch.
"Just another stupid male. Are you virgins who have never enjoyed the services of those beautiful male mages in your family? Are you actually afraid of a mage? Even if he is a legendary mage, so what, we are dark elves, born spell killers. We
Two gold-level shadow dancers and a spider queen priest can kill him in an instant..."
But at this moment, she no longer had the calmness and confidence she had when she set out.
"There are explosions, explosions, explosions everywhere. The doorbell will explode, the insoles will explode, and even the pebbles on the roadside will explode... What kind of place have we come to?"
The Golden Shadow Dancer, who was as powerful as herself, was lying on the cold floor. There was a gap in her head, her skull had flown off, and her blood and brain matter were constantly overflowing. The cause of death...
"The powerful Blood Flower Ashidi died in an exploding coat rack. Will anyone believe it? How should I explain to my family that we lost our strongest killer in less than three minutes?
Only three of the elite members of the two teams survived, and they didn't even see their opponents."
The survivors no longer dared to move forward, and when Ashidi who was retreating was killed by a coat rack, they did not even dare to retreat and could only form a group on guard.
But soon, she won't have to worry anymore.
Because in front, a floating figure emerges from the dark night, with silver frost magic and black death magic lingering between the skeletons, purple soul fire burning in the eye sockets, and the sound formed by the vibration of magic is cold and intoxicating.
despair.
"Hello, Experimental Product No. 17893, Experimental Product No. 17894, Experimental Product No. 17895, welcome to my laboratory. Well, please remember your number. From today on, this will be your new name. Here, also
It will be your home forever, and I hope I can make you feel the warmth of home."
The voice synthesized by the lich with magic power could not distinguish between men and women, and there was no emotional fluctuation. It was as if it was just announcing a fact that everyone knew. The way he looked at himself showed no male desire or female jealousy. If there was anything, it was just for him.
Interest in physiological structures.
Inexplicably, looking at the cold eyes that were burning like will-o'-the-wisps, Ellenita remembered the advice of her grandmother who hurt her the most.
"In the eyes of the world, we dark elves are evil, dangerous, and crazy, but in the face of real evil, we are just pitiful lambs waiting to be slaughtered..."
"Grandma, I finally understand your sigh. But unfortunately, it's too late... There is no good or evil, no likes and dislikes, just the look in the eyes of experimental animals, is this the real evil?"
Before she lost consciousness, this was the last sigh of Elenita, the rising star of Menzoberranzan and the noble second daughter of the third family.
