My name is Hui. It's not my real name. In fact, I don't care what my name is.
The thin girl sitting in the wheelchair looked out the window. The birds flashing outside the window were her only dream.
No, she has a special disease and her eyesight is declining every day. In her eyes, the birds flying outside the window are just gray shadows flashing at high speed.
Her world is gray.
In kindergarten, the principal was an amiable fat uncle. He would always give out snacks to everyone, and then take those beautiful children to the office to help them with their homework.
But later, before it was my turn, the affable fat uncle was taken away by the police in the town. I still remember that day when the fat uncle was surrounded by angry parents...
I don't really want to talk to other people my age because I really don't have anything to say.
My mother once took me to various hospitals for check-ups, and "autism tendency" was the word I heard most frequently.
But I don't feel autistic at all. I have many good friends at home.
Big Pyrenees, Clock Superman, Lamp Uncle, Gemini, and...
Being unsociable seems to be the focus of the naughty kids in the class.
They put small pieces of paper into my eyes and between my fingernails. Although it hurt a little, there were always people playing with me, right?
But after a while, I found that my eyes could not see very clearly, so I refused to play this game.
Those friends were very unhappy.
When I told my mother at home, she was just very angry and dragged me to find the teacher and the parents.
Mom was like an angry lioness, roaring at every enemy she saw.
However, the effect is not very good.
The next day, the way the teacher looked at me changed, and my friends seemed very angry too. They said they were being taught a lesson by their parents, and they wanted to let me have a taste of it.
I don't understand.
Later I transferred to another school.
I went to another city and met my father whom I had not seen since birth.
A man with a scruffy beard but handsome.
At that time, I didn't know what handsome was, but that's what everyone said.
All I know is that my mother cried a lot, and then our family lived together again.
When my father drove his car to pick me up from school, it was my happiest time. My classmates were very envious. Even the beautiful female teacher who taught Mandarin secretly asked me about my father.
But the good times did not last long. My mother often quarreled with my father. My father's car disappeared and the family house was changed. At that time, the most common word my mother said was "gamble".
Later, my father and mother separated. Others said they were divorced, but I know that they were never married.
When I first entered junior high school, many boys liked to get close to me and write me some unclear meanings.
Sometimes they would invite me to go out to play, but I only went there once and was scolded by my mother when I came back.
I started to learn to say no.
I don’t know whether it was due to stuffing paper in our childhood or studying too hard, but our eyesight kept declining until we put on glasses.
They say I'm more beautiful like this, and teachers often say I'm the mascot of the class.
Although I don't like this word, since everyone is happy, then I am happy too.
One afternoon, I was caught by a group of girls in an alley. They looked ferocious and the words they uttered were all insulting. I knew they were cursing.
It seems to be related to a certain boy, but I don't know who it is.
I was beaten.
This is the first time since I was little.
The broken lens got stuck in my eye and I went to the hospital.
I heard from the doctor that fortunately, today's lenses are made of resin, so they won't be too sharp when broken.
But from that day on, my view of the world became more blurry.
Mom seems to be in a lawsuit with that group of people.
We got nothing except some trivial money.
For the first time, I understood what "minor" is.
I changed schools again and became the new mascot due to my outstanding appearance.
There are still boys who give me things, and I use the "rejection" technique I have learned to reject them.
Study hard at the same time.
Because my mother told me that as long as my academic performance is good, they will not come to trouble me.
My mother always comes home very late recently, and I found that she still has contact with that man.
Yes, "that man", my mother doesn't allow me to call him dad.
Every night, what I hear most often is my mother’s mumbling as she settles accounts.
It seems that because of that man, the conditions at our home are getting worse day by day.
My big white bear stuffed animal is gone. My mother said that grown-up girls don’t need such childish toys.
However, she never bought me mature toys.
Mom seems to have made a lot of money.
It was the weekend, and she was so happy that she decided to take me on a self-driving trip!
I don't know the point of doing this. I prefer home to the outside.
In fact, my choice was the right one.
It seemed that my mother had not driven a car for many years, and the newly purchased car seemed to have brake problems or had been tampered with, as the judge later told me.
As for who it is, I still don’t know.
At that time, I only saw my mother’s frightened expression as she dodged the cat that suddenly jumped onto the road...and the oncoming truck.
The last time I saw my mother was in the hospital.
The man told me that she was gone.
That man adopted me.
Oh, I forgot to mention it. The doctor said that I was very lucky. The airbag completely caught me, but my legs stuck in the crushing patches were undoubtedly not so lucky.
The man said that his abilities were limited and he only gave me a prosthetic limb that maintained the aesthetics. However, he could not move normally and had to sit in a wheelchair most of the time.
For the first time, I felt that the world was unfair.
That man is married to another woman. I should call her... stepmother? Stepmother?
She was pretty good to me at first. After all, judging from daily life, my stepmother's family is relatively wealthy.
I have an older brother and a younger sister, both of whom are my stepmother's children.
My brother is very good to me, but his eyes sometimes look bad.
Sister...she is a naughty guy and always likes to call me lame and blind. At this time, my brother will always scold her.
When she looked at me, I saw a different emotion in her eyes. The girls who used to hit me also had this kind of look in their eyes. Later I realized that it was jealousy.
I don't understand why she is jealous of me, a cripple, a "blind" person.
Obviously there is a beautiful family, a comfortable environment, countless toys, and a large group of friends...
Due to health reasons, I no longer go to school. My stepmother hired a tutor for me, and my studies continued.
I don’t know why, maybe because I had a nanny to take care of me, my stepmother didn’t replace me with a new powered limb.
Maybe that thing is very expensive, so I just thought about it casually, this kind of life is quite good, but my mother is missing.