After another period of silence, I suddenly asked An Lan: "Many times I have been thinking, if you had told me those things about you from the beginning and let me participate, would the ending now be different?"
Same?"
An Lan shook her head. She rarely showed a lack of confidence in front of me.
After being silent for a while, he said: "I haven't thought about those things. I know you have always complained about me for not letting you get involved, but do you know? The world I live in is completely different from what you see."
"What's different? Isn't it just Antonsen?"
An Lan smiled bitterly and said, "It would be nice if it were that simple."
"What do you mean?" I suddenly felt confused.
After being silent for a while, An Lan said to me: "This has nothing to do with you. My biggest regret is that when I was your girlfriend, I didn't fulfill the responsibilities of a girlfriend and forgive me. I didn't understand what love is."
"What is love? Haha"
I smiled miserably and said, "I really doubt that we have ever gotten along in the name of love?"
"What you think depends on you in my heart, you are the only one."
"The only one what?"
An Lan didn't answer directly, she just asked me in a low voice: "If you still have the chance to choose, will you choose to know me?"
I replied without hesitation: "No, because you are too dishonest to me, you are like a mystery."
An Lan smiled lightly, she stopped talking, and just looked at the bonfire in front of her blankly.
I regret, I regret saying this but I won’t change my words.
At a certain moment, I even wanted to say to her: Yes, you are better than me in everything and you are not willing to say anything to me, so just go and bear all the pain! Anyway, I have nothing to do with you, and I don’t care about you anyway.
I don't deserve to know your world.
But after gradually calming down, I felt that I should have a good communication with her. I wanted to know everything about her in the past few years, and she should be able to tell me.
But I gave up this opportunity because it didn't seem to be important anymore and I didn't want to get involved in her things.
All I want now is to find Wang Yi as soon as possible and know that she is safe. This is what I desire most at this time.
However, I understand An Lan somewhat.
In this situation, even if you tell me, what's the point?
Like her, I also have a lot of things in my heart that I want to say but cannot say out loud.
Maybe, she is protecting me.
I don’t know how long it took, but the rain finally stopped and our firewood was almost burning.
My clothes that were soaked by the rain were also dry. I took off An Lan's coat and put on my own clothes.
At this time, An Lan and I both saw a beam of red light under the mountain rushing into the sky.
An Lan and I both knew that this was sent to us by two other rescue teams. They probably couldn't contact us on the satellite phone, so they used this method.
I sighed and said, "It would be great if we also had flares at this time."
As soon as I finished speaking, An Lan suddenly took out a flare and said to me: "What do you think this is?"
I looked at it in surprise and asked in disbelief: "Where did you come from?"
She laughed: "Did you forget that we had two teams each with one when we went up the mountain? The purpose is to avoid encountering this kind of situation."
As she spoke, she walked to the entrance of the cave and fired the flare into the sky.
And my tense nerves finally relaxed, and the world became completely quiet after this signal flare!
Now all we have to do is wait for the two professional rescue team members to come to rescue us. There is no way, their equipment is more professional than ours.
Although An Lan and I both have strong self-rescue capabilities, we have to give in in front of various professional equipment.
While waiting, we sat back by the fire.
An Lan suddenly said: "I wonder if they have found anyone?"
Thinking of this, I started to worry again.
What if they don't find it?
But since they have all gone down the mountain, it turns out that they have found someone.
When the psychological burden disappeared, my mentality gradually became peaceful.
I lit the last cigarette in the cigarette case and said to An Lan, "Thank you."
"Thank you for what?"
"Thank you for bringing two professional search and rescue team members to help me find someone tonight, including you taking such a big risk to follow me into the mountains. Thank you very much." I said sincerely.
"You're welcome, that's right."
There is no right or wrong in this world, only willingness or not, and she is willing to do all this for me.
Even if she is just out of confinement, even if she risks her life.
It was only after I relaxed that I remembered something, a very important thing.
I immediately asked her: "I have a question. I want to ask you last night that you said you were not married to that Adif. You are not married. Is that true?"
After I asked this question, An Lan selectively remained silent.
I also held my breath. I really wanted to hear her tell the truth. Even though I knew that what she said before was probably true, I still wanted to hear her say it myself.
I don't know how long she was silent before she said to me: "Yes, I have never been married, and I never said that I was married."
"What about your child?"
An Lan was stunned for a moment and replied: "Before answering your question, I also have a question to ask you."
"You ask."
"Do you love Wang Yi?"
I was suddenly stunned and couldn't figure out why she suddenly asked me this. It was a bit baffling.
After being stunned for a moment, I replied: "I don't know if it's love or not. Anyway, I promised her that I would marry her, and she is very good to me."
An Lan just smiled lightly and said: "It's good. If you choose the life that you think is right, I will silently bless you and be happy for you."
"I don't understand your answer. This is not the answer I want."
"Then what answer do you want?"
In fact, I don't know what answer I want. I probably want her to tell me in person who this child belongs to.
So, after another period of silence, I finally asked her: "Since you are not married, then this child must have a provenance, right? Whose child?"
"It's not yours anyway, don't think too much about it." An Lan's answer was indeed so decisive.
I laughed: "Okay! Then are you planning to take care of this child alone in the future?"
"Yeah." She responded softly, her expression becoming a little confused, which was rare.
In fact, I don't really have to get an answer from her, I really feel sorry for her.
Because her world, at a glance, looks like a winter with all the leaves falling off, full of desolation and frost-cracked wounds.
And I just want to be a beam of sunshine that warms her, but now this beam of light no longer belongs to her.
The fire was getting weaker and weaker as no new firewood was added, but at this moment I was completely relaxed.
We didn't talk anymore, we all looked in different directions one after another, like two strangers.
I kept looking at the starry sky outside the cave that was blocked by leaves and was only as big as my palm.