The man bared his teeth at me and smiled, then he opened the car window and said to Qiu Beidou who was standing outside chatting with Zhuge Zhengqi:
"Lao Qiu, come here and explain to this kid.
Get him back to where he was three years ago."
Fatty Qiu returned to the car window. He first bowed to the man as a salute, then he bowed his waist and said to me:
"Gadget, going back to three years ago doesn't mean it can't be done, but it can only be done theoretically.
According to Einstein’s theory of relativity, and the law of conservation of the universe, and.”
Before Qiu Beidou could finish speaking, I interrupted him directly and said:
"I'm telling you, senior fellow apprentice, no one in the world can talk about the theory of relativity or the law of conservation of the universe, but you gods are not worthy of saying that.
What? Now it’s become popular to play science in heaven?
This is not okay. We people have been superstitious for more than 20 years. Now tell me that the gods are also scientific. Who can bear this blow?
This cannot be made up for by adding another three to five hundred years to your life."
Seeing me talking nonsense in front of the Emperor of Heaven, Qiu Bulao glared at me and said patiently:
"Then I say that the two yangs give rise to the four images. The Shaoyin among the four images opposes the Sun, and the counterattacking Duyang will produce the Duyin to supplement the Duyin.
If the Yang alone is strong, the laws will be chaotic; if the Yin alone is strong, the epidemic will be chaotic."
Before Qiu Bulao finished speaking, I closed my eyes and sighed, saying:
"Okay! I was young and ignorant just now. I was wrong.
Senior brother, you should start with Einstein’s theory of relativity. To put it more simply, don’t start with the origin of the universe.
Forget it, when I was in middle school, I failed my physics class.
How about you just tell me if I can go back?"
Qiu Bulao simply shook his head and said:
"Give up, you can't go back."
"Okay, this is so much fun for him"
I gave Qiu Beidou a thumbs up with a sad face, then turned to the Emperor of Heaven and said:
"It's really not that I'm blackmailing you, it's just that I've suffered too much loss.
You see, if it hadn't been for these three lost years, I would now be the father of two children, at least a son and a daughter.
As a result, my ex-wife thought I was dead, so she beat the child out of sheer cruelty.
This will shorten the life of our old Shen family.
What are you adding--forget it, don't go to so much trouble, I will just accept you as my godfather to make up for the trauma of losing my child."
"You don't have a child, so in order to make up for the trauma, you have a godfather? Hahaha."
The man laughed. After laughing for a while, he stopped smiling, stared at me and said:
"How did Guangwu Heze become like this now?"
When I said this, not only me, but also Qiu Beidou outside the car door trembled.
Before he could speak, the car window glass had slowly risen.
My mind went blank and I didn't know what to say.
At this time, the man suddenly patted me on the shoulder, smiled again and said:
"Don't be afraid, I'm joking with you.
How could you be Guangwu Heze? If you could find him so easily, then the gods outside would not have to beat him into a hot kiln.
How could you be Guangwu Heze?
Heaven has repeatedly checked how many lives you have had, and you have nothing to do with him."
While talking, Emperor Tian took out a pack of tissues from the storage box next to the seat and handed it to me. He pointed at the dense cold sweat on my forehead and said:
"You are sweating profusely at such a young age. If you have a small country to do all sorts of things, you won't be able to earn a living for a few years.
But let’s get back to it, little guy, if you really are Guangwu Heze, will you return to heaven to confess your sins?
Let me put it another way.
As long as Guangwu Aizawa explains the matter clearly and spits out the things he shouldn't have taken, I will still restore his divine status.
When I return to heaven, Guangwu Heze will still be my divine king."
When the Emperor of Heaven was speaking, his eyes were staring at me closely.
The implication behind these words is that it is clear:
Boy, I know you are the reincarnation of Guangwu Heze.
But I don’t intend to get along with you anymore, as long as you admit your mistake and spit out the treasure you kept secret back then.
I still welcome you back to the big family of Heaven.
The cold sweat that had just subsided broke out again. I forgot that there was a pack of tissues in my hand, so I wiped the cold sweat with my sleeve and said with a dry smile:
"Your Majesty the Emperor of Heaven, I know that I, a mortal, am not worthy of being your godfather.
You don't have to scare me like this.
I just saw it with my own eyes. For a Guangwu Heze, the gods would kill each other in a fight.
I know I was wrong, and I will never mention asking you to be my godfather again.
Okay, just say that I am the most wanted criminal in heaven.
When you said those words, my crotch was wet.
Besides, I really have Guangwu Heze's ability, so I will surrender now.
By the way, if I am really telling Guangwu Heze, then Guangwu Heze will ask you to be his godfather, do you agree?
Otherwise, just think of me as Guangwu Heze
Let's set up a branch later, I'll pay for a few tables, and you will be Guangwu Heze's godfather.
After Guangwu Heze finds out, he may be moved by your benevolence and righteousness.
Guangwu Heze must think about it, if he can pretend to be a godfather, then he really can't be a close friend."
"Ha ha ha ha."
Before I could finish speaking, the Emperor laughed again.
I was laughing so hard that I felt a little scared, thinking that I was too confused by what I said this time, and that God was so anxious.
How does the old saying go - laugh when you are angry?
Seeing him laughing so hard that his whole body was shaking, he was so angry this time - is it still too late to kneel in the car and apologize?
Just before I was about to kneel down, the Emperor of Heaven suddenly opened the car door, then he got out of the car himself, waved to Yang Jian and said:
"Erlang, come here, His Highness King Yama, please come here too.
Please be your witnesses, this boy - Shen Lian, I will adopt him as my adopted son.
In this life, you will first practice in the human world, and then go to heaven to become a god."
After hearing the words of the Emperor of Heaven, Yang Jian, the real King of Yama, widened his eyes, wondering what happened in the car in just a few minutes.
The first person to react was Yang Jian. He came over and saluted me and said:
"The adopted son of the Emperor of Heaven is also the Son of Heaven
Yang Jian was disrespectful just now, please don't blame His Highness the Emperor.
All immortal friends, come here to pay homage to His Highness the Emperor."
As soon as Yang Jian finished speaking, the gods present, including He Nanxing and Wu Jun, all knelt down to salute.
At this time, the Emperor of Heaven spoke again and said:
"All free of charge
You are all gods, this boy is just an ordinary person, and he really cannot stand up to you.
Save it for now. When he reaches the immortal class, it won’t be too late for you to salute him."
I would like to recommend a book to all the brothers and sisters - Paper-tying Anecdotes in the Late Qing Dynasty. There are not many books that I can read, but this one is interesting.