Chapter 155 Jiuliuli prays that one day she can officially reconcile with her brother
"Nine-glazed glass?"
Tianhai Jiuliuli didn't respond to him. She just hugged her legs and huddled secretly behind the flower bed.
Just looking at her like this, Kanbaru's heart welled up with indescribable emotions.
This look is very familiar to Kanbaru, and it can even be said that he has seen it many times.
My past self, A Ling who ran away from home when she was a child and hid under a bridge and got wet from the rain... They all looked like they were alone, with no one approaching and no one caring.
Kaname Yuara tried to get closer to her, squatted down beside her, and asked in a gentle voice:
"Just... did you hear the entire conversation between my aunt and I?"
Tianhai Jiuliuli didn't look at him, but still nodded slightly, but after that, he buried his face deeper.
It is hard to imagine that Jiuliuli, who has always been tall, bright, gentle and elegant, would show such a fragile look now.
"Jiu Liuli, don't take what my aunt said just now...she probably wanted to——"
"Brother... needless to say... I know everything... I've known it for a long time. Qi Mingyue also hinted to me many times a long time ago..." Tianhai Jiuliuli's voice became louder and louder as he spoke.
Xiao, the more he talks, the more he swallows.
Jiuliuli already knew?
Have you known for a long time how your mother views you?
But even if she knew it, she would still be hurt if her mother told her about it.
"Since you know all about Jiuliuli, why do you still do this...?"
"...Brother thinks it's ridiculous. He obviously knows...knows that his mother doesn't treat her as a daughter...but still, it's still like this..." Tianhai Jiuliuli said this,
My eyes have started to turn red.
Kanbaru looked at her sitting on the lawn like this, looking at her flaxen hair, and felt that she was a helpless little girl now...
Jiuliuli was patiently trying not to let her tears flow out of her eyes.
She collected her emotions and continued to bury her face and said:
"It makes no sense to do this, and I won't get the care I really want... But I still want to do it and respond to my mother's expectations, even though my mother doesn't regard me as her daughter at all.
"Brother...am I stupid?"
"It's very silly..."
"...But if I don't do it, I really don't know what I should do. It seems that no one needs me, except my mother... I seem to be the redundant one...
."
Bertha is right about one thing. Jiuliuli's tenderness comes from her need for a sense of security from others, so that she can feel that she is needed by everyone again.
The lack of sense of security is somewhat similar to the cause of A Ling.
Her father left, causing A Ling to feel insecure for a long time.
Her mother left, causing Jiuliuli to feel insecure for a long time.
The difference is that Ah Ling can still rely on herself.
Jiuliuli, as a sister, she must also show her identity as a sister.
Uncle Tianhai is not good at expressing love, nor is he good at guiding children to grow up, and he is busy with work.
Under the circumstances at that time, Jiuliuli only had the piano practice left by her mother as her future goal.
There is only one goal.
While she has to take care of her sister, she also has to be strong and continue practicing the piano.
But the fact is that my mother only cares about the piano.
It's not her daughter.
"Brother...am I useless? I am hated by everyone, even my own mother doesn't like me..."
Kaname Yuara sat next to her and sighed: "No, Jiu Liuli is so gentle and treats everyone well..."
"But, everyone doesn't like me..."
"You don't need others to like you to be a good person. Just be yourself. As long as Jiuliuli is yourself, then others will definitely like you."
"The Point Guard Is Here"
Kanbaru also understood why he felt Jiuliuli was light and airy before.
In fact, the way she has always been is not her true self.
Like myself, she is a person who needs to be cared for.
Most of her gentleness and grandeur are to hide the weakness in her heart.
She actually longs to be loved and recognized.
There is nothing, even the identity of the remaining daughter has to be denied by the mother, she is just a little pitiful person.
Kaname Yuara sat next to her and couldn't even bear to look at her beautiful face.
Jiuliuli probably knew that there was still a gap between her and Shen Yuanle. She suppressed her emotions and did not burst out at him. She just endured it silently.
She felt uncomfortable, and Kambara also felt uncomfortable.
Even though he has not completely reconciled with her, as her brother, Kanbaru still couldn't bear to see this scene. He gently stretched out his hand, gently hugged her delicate shoulders, and let her lean on him.
By your side.
"Brother..."
"Let's talk about it first, I haven't forgiven you yet... It's just that as an elder brother, I really can't bear to see you like this, so I will lend you a temporary support."
Kagura Le didn't know whether it was her words that had an effect or the action of holding her shoulders. Jiu Liuli followed her movements and leaned on her shoulder, and Kagura Le also heard a sound beside her.
There was a more swallowing sound.
Kanbaru didn't look at her, just looked up at the blue sky.
But even though he didn't look at her, he could still imagine how weak and helpless Jiu Liuli looked.
Not needed.
Even my mother, whom I have always liked, only uses herself as a tool to be used.
Jiuliuli is in such a mood right now.
Gradually, Jiuliuli seemed to have thought of some sad things before, and she swallowed harder in her ears. Her little hands began to pull on the clothes on her shoulders, pulling hard, as if she was struggling to find the so-called
Rely on general.
But even so, she was still patient, trying not to let her feelings explode.
The support that I have been unable to find for more than ten years, the role of sister that I have been trying to play for more than ten years...
Kanbaru sighed, took the initiative to put his arms around her slender shoulders, and buried her face in his arms.
This was obviously very effective. The moment Tianhai Jiuliuli was held in his arms, she couldn't help but cry against him, pulling on his clothes by the collar and sobbing softly.
Listening to her weeping, Kanbaru Raku no longer meant to blame her, and gently patted her delicate back with his hand, so that she could relax more and express her suppressed emotions better.<
/p>
Jiuliuli has been saying that she is of no use, but in fact, Kanhara Le also thought so.
Apart from being able to cook and run, there’s nothing that girls like about you, right?
From this point of view, I and Jiuliuli are in the same boat.
As soon as she thought of this, Shen Yuanle felt that Jiuliuli's body had become smaller and softer in her arms.
Smelling the fragrance on her body, hearing the sadness in her voice, and feeling the touch of her grasping his collar, Kamanhara raised his arm to block her face, trying to help her cover as much of her weak side as possible.
It's really strange...I obviously haven't forgiven her yet.
But why... Kanbaru touched her fingers on Jiu Liuli's hair that was spread behind her, and stroked her back that was shaking from sobbing, and she figured it out.
In A Ling's words, she is a central air conditioner.
He is the most shameful kind of guy.
......
Jiuliuli's cries became smaller and smaller in her arms, and her strength to grab her clothes was also much less.
"Are you feeling better?"
Sensing Jiu Liuli's desire to raise her head, Kanhara let go of the arm around her back.
"I'm sorry..."
"...Okay, don't say you're sorry."
Tianhai Jiuliuli lowered his head, the corners of his eyes were red, but his condition seemed to be much better, and he smiled bitterly: "Obviously I have done something sorry for my brother, but now I have to rely on him to vent my emotions... Yes
Isn’t that weird?”
Her voice was very weak, with a bit of self-deprecation in it.
"People always want to grab something when they are mentally weak. I think..."
Kanbaru paused, "As a brother, it really doesn't matter if I give you a hug...just like A Ling wants me to comfort her when she cries. This is consistent."
"Well..."
Tianhai Jiuliuli nodded slightly, wanting to say many things, but in the end he just said softly, "Thank you, brother..."
"Don't say thank you, I'm just lending you a shoulder."
Shen Yuanle smiled, changed to a more comfortable sitting position, and sat on the grass next to the same flower bed with her, "Jiu Liuli, why do you think you practice piano?"
"Just...for mother's request."
"I don't think it's right. If you were just doing it for your mother's request, then why did you smile when you received flowers from everyone on the day of the concert?"
"This..."
"I think this is the recognition that Jiuliuli has earned through your own efforts. It is something that belongs to you. Don't worry about what your aunt said about you having nothing."
Kanbaru noticed that her little hand was shrinking inward intentionally or unintentionally, so he took the initiative to go up and squeeze half of her hand.
Tianhai Jiuliuli also raised his face and looked at him.
Kanbaru looked at her angelic face seriously and said:
"Actually, Jiuliuli should regard herself as more important. She can care about everyone and be gentle to everyone, but she should not regard this as the meaning of her existence... The meaning of her existence should be more self-centered and independent.
Some... Jiuliuli is like this in normal times, confident, majestic and gentle no matter where and when."
"That... is just an appearance..."
"Don't worry about whether it's an appearance. Since you can do it, Jiuliuli, it means it's not completely false. I don't think there's anything wrong with loving others because you want to be loved, and being gentle to others because you want to be gentle.<
/p>
"The reason is because I am like this too... Of course there are results. Isn't it just A Ling? Now she has become a tsundere brother... Haha..."
Amid the relaxed laughter, the little Jiuliuli hand held in his hand seemed to tighten a little under his words.
She listened to herself very carefully.
Kanbaru knew that she was listening patiently and carefully, and laughed at the girl in front of him who was crying uncontrollably: "I am also very naive, I just figured it out... I am obviously the most shameful because I
I feel uncomfortable, but I still have to say those words to you, and when I see the text message you sent me, I still act like a child and pretend not to see it."
"...Brother, that's my fault..."
"I'm not talking about the right or wrong of the matter, but that I was too naive in the face of your apology... It doesn't make much sense to say this. By the way, you and Qi Mingyue are not going to fight in two days.
Is it your birthday yet? Sixteen is considered half an adult. Although I am still angry with you, I am also preparing gifts for you."
Tianhai Jiuliuli looked very embarrassed under his relaxed and gentle words.
On the one hand, it was because he still felt guilty about him, but he still said these comforting words to himself.
On the other hand, she didn't know why, but when she heard him say this to her when they were alone, she felt very shy... Maybe it was a little girl's mentality? p>
She wanted to say something, but she hesitated, the words stuck in her throat, and she didn't know what to say.
My head was spinning for a long time, but in the end I could only say another apology because he was good to me.
"I've already said it, there's no need to talk about apologizing now."
"Brother, you don't think I'm stupid, do you?"
"You're a bit silly," Kanbaru said with a smile, "but you are definitely smart at ordinary times. Otherwise, why wouldn't I have passed you in the two semesters? In addition, Jiu Liuli is very cute like this. At least, I like it very much.
”
Tianhai Jiuliuli, who was praised, was even more at a loss under his words. He wanted to shrink his hand, but found that his hand was half held by him, and he did not dare to shrink back. He could only sit there in a panic.
Land.
Kagura Raku noticed something strange about her, and realized that her words of comfort actually comforted her to the point of praising her for being cute.
Doesn't this mean that you like her?
You must know that the two have not completely reconciled yet, so saying these words is more or less strange and embarrassing.
Kagura Raku subconsciously glanced at the time and found that there were still ten minutes until the end of get out of class.
"Why don't we use the time after birth to talk about Jiuliuli, what kind of gift do you like? Qi Mingyue, I have thought about it, but to be honest, I haven't carefully understood what Jiuliuli likes."
"...What do you like? I, I don't know..."
Tianhai Jiuliuri's simple "I don't know" touched Kambara's heart for a long time.
Because this proves that what Bertha said is generally correct.
Jiuliuli is a person who doesn’t even know his own needs.
No wonder you asked Qi Mingyue, Qi Mingyue never said anything.
The fundamental reason is that Jiuliuli himself doesn’t know.
"Well, how about I take you out on your birthday?"
"Want to go shopping?"
"Yeah, just think of it as a holiday to relax. It's your birthday anyway, so you have the final say... If nothing else, as an elder brother I will still fulfill your little wish.
...Wait, why are your eyes red again?"
"It's nothing... I just feel that my brother is very good... he carefully chooses gifts for his birthday..."
"If you think I'm good, then be happy and smile."
With his encouragement, Tianhai Jiuliuli opened her eyes redly and showed a smile that didn't quite look like a smile.
Kanbaru joked about her expression at this time, and Jiu Liuli really put away that strange smile in her shallow smile.
Jiu Liuli felt that her brother was speaking very relaxedly to her, with a happy mood... She was obviously sorry for him, and it was obvious that she had hurt his feelings... but he still smiled and said it to her.
These things...
When Jiuliuli remembered the past, she became nervous again. She wanted to see her brother's current expression, but found it difficult to raise her eyes.
Whenever she was about to lift up, she lowered her head quietly, always trying to dodge. Thinking that she was too embarrassed to look at him, she could only bury her gaze downwards and just stare at him, who was placed beside her, holding on
Hands on the grass.
Kanhara was happy to see that Jiu Liuli had not spoken. He thought she wanted to be quiet, so he stayed aside without saying a word, holding the grass with both hands and looking at the blue sky.
But he quickly looked away because he felt a small hand holding him.
Before I could ask, a "Brother..." appeared in my ears.
Turning his head again, Tianhai Jiuliuli moved his position towards him and stared at him for a long time.
A novice in relationships will never understand the meaning of this kind of look from a girl.
But Kanbara has seen it a lot, so he can understand.
She is looking for dependence.
——This is the look A Ling gives when she wants to act coquettishly but is too embarrassed to say it.
Compared with A Ling, Jiu Liuli's eyes are softer and more sincere.
Everyone has sad moments.
And Jiuliuli must not have completely gotten over those sad words just now...
Kanbaru felt that, at least, she should put down some things today and take the initiative to welcome her helplessness and weakness.
Kanbaru said with a smile: "Do you want to lean on me for a while or hold me for a while?"
If you ask this question to Ah Ling, she will definitely say when she is arrogant, "Who likes to hug you, but...since it is what you want, then...just give it a hug."
When it came to Jiuliuli, she just nodded in extreme shyness, signaling that it was the latter. After receiving permission, she took the initiative to move her legs and lean in.
Kanbaru watched her slowly move toward him, put her hands around his neck, and hugged him.
The skin on her hands is very delicate, and the fragrance of a girl fills the air the moment she comes over.
I don't know if it was because she cried just now, but Kambara felt that when she hugged him, she relaxed her body and even her breathing became smooth and comfortable...
She buried half of her face under her shoulders and closed her eyes heavily while breathing.
It seems that the whole person is relying on himself.
Her body is very warm. Even through her school uniform, Kagura Raku can feel the warmth coming from her body.
Kanbaru didn't want to ruin the relaxing snuggle she wanted to have on him at this time, but in terms of the result, it was completely different from when A Ling hugged him.
When hugging herself, Jiuliuli's entire body was soft.
"Brother..."
"Huh?"
"I like my brother... I didn't lie to you about this, because my brother really likes me... Obviously I am such a bad person..."
"How can...so you said you would work hard to pursue me after that?"
"Well..."
"But don't talk about such things now."
"...I know, and I also know that I have no qualifications to ask my brother for anything, but I...still have a request to make to my brother...okay?"
Kanbaru listened to her voice that was almost inaudible, and immediately felt the girl in his arms getting closer. The fragrance of her body and the petiteness of her body seemed to hit his chest.
"Well, tell me, what is the request?"
"Just... hold me for a little longer... It'll be fine..."