Four hundred and thirtieth chapters in the name of love (thirty-five)
"My name is Park Yunjin."
"He's a psychiatrist."
"I'm good at treating patients, I'm also good at patiently listening to patients' nonsense, and I'm good at discussing many novel world views with them."
"I always think that the reason why they are called mentally ill is that they are different from most people, so they are called sick..."
"All along, I actually thought they were quite normal."
"It's just that the view is too advanced and ordinary people can't understand it."
"I hoped that I would become one of them and explore a richer world with them."
"until……"
"I watched helplessly as a patient threw feces into instant noodles, mixed it together and put it into his mouth."
"He told me that since everything a person eats will turn into shit, why not just eat shit?"
"so."
"From that time on."
"I gave up on the childish idea of becoming mentally ill..."
…
…
The sky is gray.
This is a sign that it will rain again.
In the winter just after Christmas, I always like to sprinkle some rain on the city from time to time.
The biting wind of winter.
Many people have to wear those bulky cotton-padded clothes.
Park Yunjin is no exception.
Even if he thinks that wearing cotton clothes will make him bloated and inconvenient to move, he will look like a naive fat man.
But facing the weather which is already several degrees below zero.
He thought it would be better to become a warm fat man...
Except when he records his work.
Holding the pen is a little awkward.
There's nothing wrong with it, right...
"Old Wang, I see that you have been absent-minded recently. You always like to squat in the corner and be in a daze. What are you doing?"
Park Yunjin holds a notebook for daily records.
Writing the medical records that should be collected today.
He sat on the edge of the white hospital bed and looked quietly at the old man curled up in the corner.
The old man turned his head after hearing his words.
He sighed heavily.
"I miss my son. Whenever my legs hurt for a long time, he will come to see me."
he said.
The wrinkles on the old man's face are very deep, and there are countless layers of crow's feet accumulated just at the corners of his eyes.
His hospital clothes are quite clean.
He is one of the few elderly people in this hospital who can still manage his physical condition well and will not have diarrhea in his pants.
This makes Park Yunjin feel pretty good...
"Well, yes, your son should be here too, so what are you doing squatting in the corner? Didn't you always squat in the toilet when you missed your son?"
Pu Yunjin wrote down what the old man said in his notebook, and then asked.
In fact, this old man spent a lot of time in the hospital.
A little longer than him.
Ever since Pu Yunjin came to this mental hospital and started working, this old man has been here...
Due to suffering from rheumatism for many years.
So every time it rains, the old man's legs will hurt. He must be used to it. When he is in pain, he doesn't make a fuss, he just keeps sighing.
His son works in another province.
I only have time to visit him during the Chinese New Year.
There are many rainy days in winter.
There is also a big difference in temperature between day and night...
This also gave the old man an illusion - as long as his legs started to hurt for several days, he thought that his son was coming to see him.
For this kind of old man.
He doesn't know how to play with mobile phones and doesn't like watching TV.
The biggest hope of staying in the hospital every day is that his child, who has been working hard outside all year round, comes back to see him...
The old man listened to Pu Yunjin's question.
He lowered his eyes and replied: The phone in the bathroom was occupied by someone. He used it for several days, and I came back to use my own phone."
"Huh? Who occupied it? And it was used for several days?"
Pu Yunjin wrote the old man's words in a notebook, raised his head and asked.
"A young man I didn't know said he missed his partner, so he used my phone first."
The old man sighed.
I don’t know if he felt that the young man was also pitiful. After answering, he added: "Why do people nowadays always like to run outside? There are no acquaintances outside. How lonely it is outside. When you come back,
It would be nice to be able to chat with my family at home."
"I miss them, so I can only call them. They don't speak, they just listen."
"It would be so wrong if I was bullied by someone outside..."
Speaking of which.
Perhaps the old man thought that his son who was working hard outside might be bullied, so he started to shed tears like a child and kept wiping them with his sleeves.
I couldn't help sobbing.
"Hey, don't worry, Lao Wang, he won't be bullied. I know your son, he is very capable. The Chinese New Year is coming soon, and he will come back to see you."
Park Yunjin was talking.
While writing down the old man's current condition in the notebook.
After recording this last ward.
He closed the notebook and silently exited the room. Before leaving, he said: "Old Wang, remember not to always call your son in the corner. It's been cold recently and the signal in the corner is not good. You have to cover yourself with a quilt on the bed."
He can hear clearly from his side."
Finished.
Pu Yunjin closed the door.
Walk towards the exit of the corridor.
Checking the wards is an essential part of his daily work. Today is a day off. Generally speaking, you can go back to rest after checking the wards.
But when he was in the corridor.
I saw Yang Xiaohui, an employee on duty here.
Out of doubts about what he had learned after checking the ward in the past two days, he stopped the other party and prepared to ask about the situation.
"Xiaohui, have you seen anyone strange entering our hospital recently?"
"No, what's wrong?"
Yang Xiaohui thought carefully and then answered.
"It's nothing. It's just that after the ward rounds in the past two days, several patients said they saw a young man they didn't recognize, always in the toilet, so I want to ask you."
"bathroom?"
"Yes, our hospital has not admitted any new patients recently. One or two people saw it and could explain it as hallucinations, but several people said they saw a young man and described them in similar ways. I think someone may have come in...
...If you have time, please help check the surveillance camera in the toilet."
Park Yunjin said.
Yang Xiaohui in front of him had a strange expression after hearing this.
There's nothing interesting to see in this mental hospital, so how could anyone break in.
And he was heading towards the toilet...
"Do you think a passerby wanted to use the toilet, so he came in to use it?"
Yang Xiaohui asked.
"I don't know about this. It's best not to let outsiders in. We are all mentally ill. It would be bad if there is any misunderstanding or accident due to friction. That's it. I'll go to the doorman later and ask if you have anything today.
Adjust the monitoring when the time comes."
"All right."
After Pu Yunjin finished his instructions.
So I took my notebook with me and prepared to ask the hospital guard.
Not to mention normal times, a patient committed suicide not long ago. In such a sensitive period, if outsiders are allowed in at will, it will be bad if something happens.
If there is a situation where passers-by use the toilet.
Then he needs to talk about it carefully.
To avoid this happening...
"Uncle Li has been a guard for a day or two. He shouldn't let anyone in. Did he sneak in? It's strange..."
Park Yunjin couldn't figure out the reason.
I just had to scratch my head.
I wonder if Uncle Li has been in a bad state of mind these past two days and has lost concentration, which is why something like this happened.
But just when he was about to step out of the corridor.
But he heard Yang Xiaohui's voice faintly coming from behind him...
"What? It's so troublesome to adjust the monitoring. If someone just borrows a toilet, what kind of trouble could it cause? It's completely unfounded."
Park Yunjin stopped.
Turn around and look back.
He looked at Yang Xiaohui's back in the corridor and felt a little confused.
"Are people nowadays so open and aboveboard even when they say bad things..."
…
…
"That day is over."
"I asked the doorman, Uncle Li, and he said that the weather has been very cold recently and most people are staying at home. It is rare to see a few people at the entrance of this remote hospital all day long, let alone sneaking in."
"He even slapped his chest and coughed, assuring me that he knew the content of his job and the special nature of this hospital, and would not let outsiders in."
"Yang Xiaohui also told me the next day that she called up the surveillance and did not see any strange people appearing. It may be a cognitive bias formed when the patients chatted."
"Because she said bad things about me that day, I'm not at ease about it..."
"While she was away, I went to adjust the monitoring myself."
"But it's exactly as she said, the surveillance screen shows normal..."
"Because I couldn't find the reason for the strange young man mentioned by the patient, I could only keep it in mind and pay attention from time to time."
"Until one day."
"There was a little incident..."
…
…
"Hey boss, can you make this cheaper? I can buy more. The price is really a bit expensive."
Pu Yunjin is carrying a bag of cabbage.
At the vegetable market, I negotiated prices with the stall owner in front of me.
"It can't be cheaper anymore. This is the lowest price. No matter how cheap it is, I will lose money. If you buy more, how about I give you some green onions?"
[What’s cheap? It’s cheap. It’s just a few dollars more. Why is there any need to bargain? 】
Park Yunjin looked at the boss who was smiling.
He thought he must have read correctly just now.
This boss.
Didn't you open your mouth?
How can I say something without opening my mouth?
Ventriloquism??
And he said it so unpleasantly, only a devil would buy food at his house...
"Thank you, boss, I don't want it anymore."
Pu Yunjin said politely, and then walked to other stalls to choose from the boss's smile without hesitation.
Saw this look.
The boss was a little anxious.
It's a bit late today, and the dishes at his stall haven't been sold yet.
There is no freezer at home.
Tomorrow you will definitely be able to tell at a glance that it is not fresh, and then it will be even harder to sell, and the price will be even lower...
"Hey, look, handsome man. The price can be lower. Tell me how much you want. If you can buy more, I'll give you a dollar cheaper per catty, okay?"
[Come on, let’s just leave. It’s cheap. Take all these leftovers. It won’t be easy to sell them tomorrow anyway.]
Pu Yunjin said nothing.
He just turned his head and looked at the boss.
I was very confused.
He felt as if he had been imprisoned for decades. Why did he speak so straightly?
Although he doesn't often buy groceries and go home to cook for himself.
But it’s not like he hasn’t bought the boss’s food before.
In his impression, the other party shouldn't talk like this, right?
"Boss, you..."
He was about to say something.
The market owner had already taken his arm and walked back to the stall. Then he took out a bag and started loading him with the vegetables he just wanted to buy.
"Oh, we're all acquaintances. I'll give you a discount today. You can take as much as you want."
[This young man... Hey, hurry up and go home for dinner after selling out. I'm hungry again. By the way, Xiaoli asked me to go to her house today. I have to find some excuse to tell my wife...]
[Forget it, it’s too much trouble, I’m not in a hurry for a day or two, just give her a call and tell her to come next time.]
[Maybe it’s possible to indulge in lust and make her like me more, hehehe...]
Pu Yunjin frowned.
He silently looked at the stall owner who was loading things for him.
No matter how you say it.
These words are no longer something that can be said casually to a customer...
I thought this boss was quite good at playing.
He also felt extremely strange.
The boss didn't speak again after saying the first sentence. Where did the voice behind it come from?
Pu Yunjin didn't think that the market owner was using ventriloquism to tell others.
The latter is thinking about things with Xiaoli...
When the bag filled with vegetables was handed to Pu Yunjin's hand.
Only then did he react and catch the dish.
I paid the money with a confused look on my face.
He returned to his home with a very strange expression...
…
…
"Think about it carefully."
"Maybe it started from the day of Yang Xiaohui."
"I seem to have an extra ability that I fantasized about when I was a kid."
"Hear other people's voices..."
"That guy Qianye always gives me some inspiration when I write. It's not like I don't know about this ability."
"Suddenly having superpowers feels like a dream..."
"over time."
"I am also slowly able to hear more people's thoughts."
"It's hard to imagine this scenario."
"I once thought that after I could hear other people's thoughts, I could clearly understand a person and know his true heart."
"But I didn't expect it."
"Even just walking around on the street, my ears feel like garbage has been dumped out, full of vanity, swear words, sarcasm, selfish desires, and those unsightly fantasies, etc..."
"It's painful to understand the human heart."
"Any adult will have a dark side in his heart that cannot be concealed...perhaps because he has always been told to be a polished, polite and moral person, so he will suppress those disgusting dark sides."
“The kindhearted person who gave alms to the beggars on the overpass.”
"Most of them comfort themselves by saying that he is really kind..."
"I rarely get to see that."
"There was a man who gave money to a beggar because he felt sorry for him."
"even."
"Some people were thinking that because there were many passers-by at the time, he dropped the money in his pocket, just imagining that he might be praised..."
"Too hypocritical and artificial."
"I went into autistic isolation for a short period of time."
"Soon."
"I realized that I myself seem to be such a person, a person who is restricted by rules but actually has a dark heart."
"I reacted then..."
"Perhaps human beings are just one type of animal. It is normal to have inner darkness and unrealistic fantasies."
"Those who have the ability to suppress these desires are called human beings."
"And what cannot be suppressed is called nausea."
"I felt relieved again for a short time..."
"It's just that I didn't let go completely enough."
"I began to subconsciously avoid people, wanting to confine myself in that home where there was no human noise..."
"Of course the reality is I still have to work."
"Otherwise, we are destined to have no food to eat."