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Month-end summary for failed authors

First of all, I'm sorry. I originally planned to finish writing the ending casino plot yesterday and today.

But looking at the status, I can’t write it out.

Coupled with the factors of opening this volume, my state has been really bad this month.

So much so that I even gave up on myself a little bit

For book friends who are following updates, it really means that you can follow with confidence,

If you can spend more than three yuan a month, I lose.

It sounds like a joke (smiles bitterly)

It's very annoying, I can't write it down, it makes me very annoyed,

There are fewer and fewer updates in a month, and my mentality is broken.

Why can't I write it?

I didn’t think much about the plot behind it. I didn’t expect it to be so exciting that I couldn’t wait to write it. There was no goal or expectation.

The result is that I resist coding every day, procrastinate in the morning, and finally have to write until midnight, feeling very tired. The next day, I procrastinate in the morning because I stayed up late the night before, and it is an endless cycle.

To sum it up roughly, it’s Kavin.

Why Carvin?

After writing the latest chapter, I kept asking myself why I didn’t want to write it.

After thinking about it, it's still the cliché emptiness in life.

I just stayed at home and didn’t meet or interact with anyone except my parents.

There is nothing to do to make myself happy. Of course, I don’t have a girlfriend either.

There are only code words in my life

Boring, boring, empty, lonely to death

Finding it boring is really a devastating blow to a salty fish like me.

Use interest as motivation. When you are not interested enough, various problems will always arise.

When I continue to write for the sake of royalties, I guess I will not be far away from writing.

From the updates of this volume so far, I can clearly feel that there are some chapters that I rushed out because I didn’t want to stop updating them.

It gives me a very unsteady and uneasy feeling

I always want to turn it over and change it, but once I open it I don’t know what else to change.

No, it’s not just this volume, I felt this way at the end of the previous volume

Not satisfied enough, not confident enough, not exciting enough

The plot of the casino feels a bit bloated, and I feel that my subconscious has written too many words in order to complete the update.

And in order to reflect the breathless atmosphere, I deliberately did not write about the relaxed interaction with Adeline.

There seems to be too much written about psychological processes.

Alas, every time like this, I just think that it would be great if my writing could be better.

It would be nice if I could express those thoughts in shorter words

[And I may have to do pigeons in the past few days of May Day. In order to let you notice at a glance, I put them in brackets]

I'm on the train now, planning to go out and relax

This is my second trip in my life. I hope it won’t fail like the year before.

And I really don’t want to stay at home anymore

I really want to change, change my situation, rekindle my passion

But I don’t know what to do at all

I want to leave home, but I don’t know where to go. I want to go to a city, but I don’t want to go alone.

It would be even worse to rent a house alone in a strange city without friends and sit at home writing novels all day long.

It feels like after graduating from college,

It's like life has stopped

I don't know what to do at all. I feel like I'm just wasting my youth by following the crowd.

ha.....

Finally, I am really sorry to all the book friends who support genuine books,

I'm really sorry for catching up with a useless loser like me.

(apology)


This chapter has been completed!
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