The horrific experience in the previous life has left a shadow in Gu Yang's heart.
In this life, with the addition of a panel and a mysterious 'mailbox', he will never let tragedy happen again.
Before dawn, Gu Yang got up, shirtless, and did 200 super-standard push-ups and 500 squats in one breath, but he didn't feel tired at all.
Now he is not only young and energetic.
The body has directly exceeded the limits of human beings.
Gu Yang remembered that in his previous life, when he was at this age, he could only do thirty push-ups and never did more than twenty squats, and his legs were so weak.
This once again allowed him to witness the authenticity and reliability of the 'traceability panel'.
Then he gritted his teeth and went straight to take a cold shower.
Taking a cold shower, he couldn't do it even to death in his previous life, let alone in the middle of winter.
Now he is very eager, as if there is a raging fire burning in his body, and his whole body is extremely hot.
After washing up, I felt much more relaxed.
......
The sky was bright, and Gu Yang went downstairs to buy soy milk and steamed buns. He got 10 portions of each, twice as much as the previous day, and there was not even a scrap left.
At a nearby mutton restaurant that opened, Gu Yang bought another bowl of mutton steamed buns.
After packing, take a bus to the cancer hospital.
Gu Yang firmly believed that the more he had no clue, the closer he should be to Song Hui.
After all, the wool comes from the sheep, and the answer to the 'broken hand' naturally comes from Song Hui.
Still the familiar Ward 404.
After the first experience, Gu Yang seemed much more natural this time.
"Brother, I came to see you again!"
Gu Yang walked to Song Hui's bedside with a familiar look and placed the steaming mutton on the bedside table.
Through the hints of mysterious runes, he vaguely knew that Song Hui's favorite food was mutton steamed buns.
Although he is not sure, mutton steamed buns are the favorite delicacy of northerners, and Song Hui is naturally no exception.
And the price of this bowl of mutton steamed buns is not low.
Gu Yang felt that since everyone has cancer and will die no matter what, there is nothing to avoid. If you can eat it, you can eat it. If you don't eat it, you will eat it in vain.
They are strangers.
He was already very touched that Gu Yangneng came to see him.
I get so many things every time I come here.
When excited, Song Hui didn't know what to do.
Struggling to get off the hospital bed, Gu Yang hurriedly pushed him back.
"Don't, don't do this!"
Song Hui sat down again and thought about what he wanted to say for a long time, but in the end it felt like something was stuck in his throat and he couldn't say it out.
My heart was in turmoil, and the expression on my face seemed to say: How can someone treat me well even though I am about to die?
Gu Yang didn't think too much and hurriedly opened the lunch box, picked up a piece of it with chopsticks and fed it to Song Hui's mouth.
Song Hui said hurriedly: "No, thank you Gu Yang, I will do it myself!"
Gu Yang gave him the chopsticks.
Although he is terminally ill, he is not yet at the point where he is completely unable to take care of himself.
Perhaps it had been a long time since he had eaten it. Song Hui picked up the chopsticks and put it into his mouth. The delicious taste of mutton quickly spread in the ward, covering up the original smell. Song Hui devoured it as if he had been hungry for three days.
Night.
But after eating a few big mouthfuls, my stomach started to churn and I couldn't bear it.
Ugh!!!
Wow!!!
A stream of mutton spurted out along with blood.
Gu Yang was stunned and hurriedly took the trash can over.
Song Hui vomited for a long time, and finally vomited out all the food he had eaten. His whole face became pale and cold, and he felt as if his life span had been shortened by ten years in an instant.
Gu Yang blamed himself very much, but was helpless.
The patients on the side were stunned by the scene just now.
After a while, the expressions on everyone's faces were surprisingly consistent.
Gu Yang: "Sorry! I'm so sorry! I didn't know you would be like this!"
Song Hui: "No, no, it's me, brother Gu Yang, it's my problem, I'm so unsatisfied!"
In this way, the two of them started to blame each other...
Inadvertently, Gu Yang found a book that Song Hui had opened.
There is a sentence in it that stands out:
"There is only one truly serious philosophical issue, and that is suicide."
Under this book, there is also a book called "Eight Million Ways to Die".
"Does he want to commit suicide?"
Gu Yang came to this conclusion instantly.
In fact, anyone would think this way in this situation.
But in front of Song Hui, Gu Yang couldn't ask so straightforwardly.
But Gu Yang's nervous expression has been noticed by Song Hui.
He took the initiative to pick up "The Myth of Sisyphus" and asked with a smile that made Gu Yang uneasy:
"Brother Gu Yang, do you think I will commit suicide?"
Gu Yang took a deep breath, feeling as if the secret in his heart had been stolen by the other party. He changed from being active just now to being passive, clumsy, embarrassed, and very embarrassed.
Song Hui continued: "Have you read this book?"
Gu Yang nodded: "Written by Camus?"
Song Hui: "Yes, this book talks about suicide everywhere, but it does not encourage people to commit suicide. Of course, I will not commit suicide either."
After speaking, he skillfully pulled out a ‘photo sticker’ style photo.
This kind of photo looks familiar to Gu Yang. Isn’t this thing just popular recently?
In the photo is a portrait of a young girl, very beautiful, with a face full of sunshine.
Gu Yang asked curiously: "Who is she?"
Song Hui said: "My girlfriend."
Gu Yang: "Didn't she come to see you?"
Song Hui: "She... doesn't need it."
"No need?" Gu Yang didn't understand what he meant.
Since she doesn't come to see him, what does it mean that he still collects her photos?
Song Hui: "I don't need it. I don't want her to see my decadent look now."
Gu Yang: "So you..."
Song Hui: "Yes, we broke up."
At this point, Gu Yang didn't know how to continue.
Obviously, this is a sad story.
He pulled off a piece of paper towel and symbolically wiped it on the table.
The heating in the ward was very hot, and the smell of hot mutton had faded away, replaced by the stench of an aging body, which was particularly strong, but Gu Yang had gradually become accustomed to this smell.
Yes, he can't show any suspicion.
Song Hui continued: "I broke up with her."
Gu Yang: "I know."
Song Hui was in a daze, as if he was lost, and felt very helpless.
After calming down for a moment, he sighed: "Actually, I love her very much, very much. She is my first love and my favorite girl in my life, but I can't give her true love. We have been together since freshman year.
We were together when we were young, and we promised to get married when I made money, but I didn't do it, and I'm sorry for her."
Gu Yang: "It's not all your fault!"
Song Hui choked up twice, and then tears flowed down uncontrollably.
Gu Yang pulled off the tissue and handed it to him.
Don’t encourage others to do good without going through their suffering.
Gu Yang did not comment on Song Hui's actions, but listened silently, understood and sympathized.
Er.
Gu Yang pretended to wipe the table and asked weakly.
"Do you regret doing that now?"
Song Hui raised his head and glanced at Gu Yang, with a hint of determination in his black eyes.
"No regrets!"
Gu Yang: "Does your girlfriend know about your illness?"
Song Hui: "She doesn't know."
Obviously this is the point.
Gu Yang concentrated his attention and said without emotion: "So, you break up with her before she knows."
"Yes, if she knew that I was sick, she would definitely not break up with me. She is a good girl, she is very sensible, she is considerate, she loves me very much, and I love her very much, both of us...
...
"Now I...this may be my fate. God doesn't want us to be together...I don't want her to be sad if she knows.
"She still has a long way to go in life, and I may leave this world at any time. I don't want her to become a widowed woman. I can't be so selfish."
......
......
This day.
Song Hui told Gu Yang many, many past events about him and his girlfriend.
After hearing this, Gu Yang was a little envious.
It's just fate, maybe fate plays tricks on people. Gu Yang was surprised that Song Hui would make such a cruel decision at this time.
Maybe everyone is different.
He was just surprised.
If it were him, the decision might not be as good as Song Hui's.
The girl’s name is Wen Yali.
As the name suggests, he is not only beautiful and charming, but also very considerate. He can also endure hardships and stand hard work. He is not too dirty or too tired, and he accompanies Song Hui to do express delivery.
Speaking of which, the reason why Song Hui Express has been so smooth sailing is largely due to Wen Yali's contribution.
Just imagine, a girl who is in adolescence and as beautiful as a flower follows a boy who has nothing, starts from scratch with him, and then turns her pair of fair and delicate hands into a pair full of calluses and a ruddy face.
Her face turned into that of a yellow-faced old woman...
How much courage does this require!?
If it weren't for love, which girl would be willing to waste her youth.
It’s just that Song Hui really doesn’t live up to expectations.
After being diagnosed with cancer, I couldn't find a decent reason for breaking up, so I actually humiliated them in front of all the employees with extremely vicious language.
It was nothing more than humiliation, but he actually deliberately said that he already had a girlfriend.
At that time, even his employees couldn't stand it.
Wen Yali was heartbroken and finally left him on a rainy night.
He didn't chase either.
Even if it hurts so much that I can’t breathe.
Since then, he has no trace of his girlfriend.
......
For Wen Yali.
There is no doubt that she already hates Song Hui.
But Gu Yang felt...
Yes, he thinks Song Hui is a pretty good person. He may have done some things inappropriately, but his nature is not bad.
If there was no cancer, he might live happily with Wen Yali.
If two people who have the same views and truly love each other are together, even if fate makes a joke on them, it will not be a fight.
Because the two of them chatted quite speculatively.
Of course, Song Hui spoke even harder, as if he would never settle down until he finished telling the story he had buried in his heart.
So at noon, Gu Yang did not leave.
He ordered the set meal from the hospital for lunch.
As for Song Hui, the tube was still inserted, and the tube contained high-grade nutrient solution. The tube went straight to the blood vessels and did not pass through the tip of his tongue.
He watched Gu Yang eating with relish.
.......
Afternoon.
The two met again and chatted about Western philosophy, such as Nietzsche, Kant, Plato, Russell... whatever came to mind.
Deep in love, Song Hui also explained his understanding of the meaning of life to Gu Yang.
He said: "Life is actually meaningless. If there is, there is only one."
Gu Yang: "What?"
Song Hui: "Live towards death."
Gu Yang breathed a sigh of relief.
But I still can’t let go.
From the beginning to the end, Song Hui seems to be describing the meaning of 'suicide', and he talks about it with gusto.
Gu Yang is always looking for the truth!
He himself has no conclusion as to what the truth is. In short, he is completely confused.
Fortunately, the 'tracing progress' on the panel continued to grow steadily, so he didn't care about the so-called 'conclusion'.
Let everything take its course.
Song Hui continued: "Of course, my 'meaning of life' is about to be realized. Before I die, I still have one unfulfilled wish."
Gu Yang quickly asked: "What is your wish?"
Song Hui didn't say anything.
After a moment of silence, he said he was going to take a walk in the corridor.
Gu Yang helped him out of bed, but he refused.
"I can walk, Brother Gu Yang, I can walk. I just don't have a stomach, I have legs and feet."
Gu Yang didn't force it.
Like an irresponsible second-rate nurse, walking along the empty corridor with Song Hui.
During the walk, the two of them said nothing. For a moment, the two of them seemed like complete strangers. Of course, they had never known each other, but they always used a certain tacit understanding to ease their awkwardness.
It will soon get dark.
Parting is one step closer.
Looking at the abyss-like window outside the window, Gu Yang felt that it was time for him to go back. If he didn't have a car later, he would probably get lost on this cold and windy street.
Gu Yang patted Song Hui on the shoulder and said goodbye to him.
Song Hui looked at Gu Yang with reluctance on his face.
After just two days, the two of them have become like close friends.
For Song Hui, this feeling is particularly strong.
He already regards Gu Yang as his relative.
Song Hui said: "I'm so sorry! I asked you to stay so late."
Gu Yang: "Wherever I go, it doesn't matter whether I go back early or late. I'm free anyway."
Song Hui: "Okay, then go back quickly. It's getting dark. If it's too late... By the way, brother, don't come to see me tomorrow. Of course it's not because of... these two
I am very happy to have you here, really, really thank you!"
Gu Yang doesn't like this kind of erotic scene.
Said without any emotion:
"Goodbye!"
After saying that, he turned around and left.
Song Hui stared blankly at Gu Yangyuan's retreating figure like a puppet.
After disappearing completely, he quickened his pace and walked towards the front desk of the hospital...