I clearly have my own consciousness, but my whole body is not under my control. I look at the wall outside the gate of my house with a silly smile on my lips. My feet stepping on the snow don't feel the slightest bit of coldness, and my eyes can aim.
I saw her, a woman in tattered clothes but with a charred face. She danced and pointed at the target location, giggling and saying, "Good girl, bump it, bump it!!!"
‘Dong~~dong~~dong~~’
My head hit the wall as straight as hitting a wooden fish, and there was a dull sound on my forehead. I knew clearly in my heart that if I hit it like this, what Sanmei'er would see when she got out of the hospital tomorrow morning would probably be my scalp bleeding to death and...
I looked like I was freezing to death, but I didn’t know the pain, and I couldn’t control myself to stop. If someone were passing by, they would definitely see me smiling stupidly. Yes, I am being toyed with by a ghost.
…
And this ghost is an old acquaintance of mine. I still clearly remember the way she fucked An Qi while my father begged for money and I beat him with my waistband. Unexpectedly, thirty years from Hedong to thirty years from Hexi, this
It didn't take long for her to take revenge.
It’s okay to be a useless person, but now, even ghosts come to my door to avenge me for being bullied before. It’s really sad and laughable.
I bumped my head again and again, feeling the warm blood slowly dripping down the bridge of my nose to my chin. Finally, it was blown cold by the cold wind. The corners of my mouth were a little numb when I smiled. Maybe it was the spiritual energy in the water that my body received that allowed me to see her.
And I was still sober in my heart watching how she played me to death, but I have to say that this way of death is not painful, except that I looked a little miserable when I was seen in the morning, but as far as the process is concerned, it is definitely comfortable.
.
‘Dong~dong~dong~’
I was so stupid that I banged my head until my head bled, but my mind was still running wildly. I even thought that maybe one day this place would be haunted, just watching me bang my head again and again...
"Kick, knock... it's so fun! So fun! Harder! Harder!!"
Her smile became sharper and wilder, and she jumped up and down behind me with a distorted face. My eyes gradually turned scarlet, the color I saw when blood flowed into my eyes. I closed my eyes with a silly smile. I didn’t know how long I would have to fight.
But I thought, should I be about to die? It’s great. Those who are killed will not be too cowardly when mentioned in the future.
"Roar~~!!!"
A low roar suddenly hit my ears accompanied by the cold wind. I trembled, and my neck was instantly under my control. The blood from my forehead made me dizzy for a moment. I held on to the blood-stained wall where I hit it.
Turning around, I was completely stunned.
The thing in front of me had white fur standing on end. It was holding its hands on the ground. It was staring in the direction behind me, its copper bell-like eyes glowing blood red. The woman behind me wanted to float away in a hurry, but behind the scenes, it was high.
It jumped up high and pounced on the woman behind me, letting out a low roar. I didn't see it raise its teeth to bite, but I just watched its little hand dig directly into the woman's heart. The lonely soul was instantly
It just melted away——
It broke up, and this female ghost was so completely devastated by it that she no longer even had the right to be a ghost...
I held my breath from my chest. My feet were so cold that I couldn't control myself. I just turned around stiffly and looked at its face hard. For a long time, I couldn't believe that it was actually it I saw: "Little... little
Gazi?"
Its mouth was still grinning, and it fiercely scratched the boundary of the woman's soul twice. Then it raised its eyes to look at me, the red light in its eyes gradually faded away, and it jumped up and ran into my yard!
"Hey! Little Gazi! Don't leave!!"
I hurriedly called it, and I will never forget its facial features. Although most people will think that mandrills are exactly the same when they grow up, in fact, as long as you pay attention, you will feel that they are the same as human faces.
There is a difference.
Just like the people in the village raising livestock, mules and horses, the people in the city all look the same, but the people in the village know each other and know that each horse and mule look different. Xiaogazi and I should have a year
I haven’t seen him for a long time. As a spiritual creature, it must have a different growth and lifespan than humans. At that time, it couldn’t walk, but now it looks like a four or five-year-old child, and it can run and cross.
, the ruthlessness is not inferior to those of adult mandrills. I am absolutely sure that this is the little mandrill that I have been with. But, why is it here?!
"Little bastard!!" I shouted again, "Don't..."
The little geezer is back. It jumped out from the wall like a child and stood in front of me. In its small hands, it actually held a pair of cotton shoes that were a bit big for it——
"Gah~"
Just like before, it made a soft cry like a grandma, and the little hand holding the big shoe moved towards me. I pursed my lips hard, squatted down without picking up the shoe, but stretched out my arm to hold the hair.
The fluffy dog hugged her, tears welling up in the cold wind: "Xiao Gazi, it's really you, why are you here? I'm sorry, I originally said I wanted to see you, my sister misses you so much.
Ah, I really miss you..."
"Gah~"
It was still very sensible and popular, wiping my tears with its little hands, and stubbornly holding the pair of shoes in its hand to signal me to put them on quickly, sniffing, and I looked at it while crying and laughing, and was no longer conscious.
I put my feet into the shoes, and I hugged it and nestled at the door. It was very warm, and holding it was like holding a heater. I remember that when I was in the cave in Changbai Mountain, I held it.
I didn't feel the slightest bit of coldness.
It was very quiet all around. Apart from the sound of the wind, there was no sound. The little gazi just sat next to me quietly, with steam rising from his big eyes. He watched me cry, and he kept crying.
She wiped my tears with her little hands, and her whole face was filled with silent comfort. It wasn't until my mood gradually stabilized that I looked at it and then gently opened my mouth: "Xiao Gazi, how do you know I'm here? You're not
Do you live in Changbai Mountain..."
"Gah~~"
It seemed to be responding to me, pointing to the top of the mountain where Uncle Chou was buried. I looked up and looked over, slightly confused: "But this mountain..." I suddenly remembered Uncle Chou's words, "Yes, this is a branch of Changbai Mountain.
…”
A bitter smile emerged from the corner of his mouth, "It seems that everything is destined."
The little Gazi blinked and looked at me, seemingly not understanding what I was talking to myself. I looked at its still-developing big nose and remembered the way it once put my hand on its chest.
One word, spirit...
"Xiao Gazi, did you manipulate the water in my water tank? Are you helping me?"
It looked at me with its big eyes and stretched out its little hand to show me: "Gah..."
Under the moonlight, I saw a wound at a glance: "Your blood... did you put your blood into the water tank?"
After a while, it nodded and pointed at me with that finger, "Gah~"
I hugged it tightly, and suddenly I understood everything: "Although I don't have innate yin and yang, so I don't have the ability to understand, but you want to help me, so you are giving me spirit, hoping that my mind will still have understanding in the future, right?"
"
It still nodded and made a chirping sound like a baby.
"But why don't you want me to know, little Gazi, you should have let me know earlier."
It looked up at me, pointed inside the wall, and then covered its eyes. Finally, it looked at me and shook its head. I smiled softly: "I understand, you are afraid that Third Sister will see you."
, you’re scared, right?”
"Gah~"
It nodded again, pointed at my chest, and then leaned its head up. I hugged it and sighed softly: "It's me who's stupid, little bastard. I should have come out to find you earlier. You were afraid of being caught by others."
See, if I come out earlier, I can see you earlier..."
Holding it in my arms, I rambled on about what happened to me over the past year. I thought it wouldn’t understand many of the things, but inexplicably, it took it to be Zong Bao’s role, and San Meier’s role as Dan Feng.
She is the girl who bears this with me. I dare not say too many negative words because it is pressure for her. We are both very protective of each other, but the more protective we are, the less we can vent.
She relies on me, but is afraid that this dependence will burden me. She shows me that she can be self-reliant all the time. Seeing her like that makes me feel really sad, but I feel powerless inside.
"Xiao Gazi, you know, I want to do many things, but now, I can only hide my head like an ostrich. I know that hiding a head will not help, because the body is still outside, not me
I don’t want to face it, but I don’t know how to face it. I even think that if I don’t die, these three years will be infinitely long. Otherwise, what should I do and how should I live to face it?
To my relatives and friends, tell them that I actually can’t stand up at all, and all my words are nice to comfort them..."
The little gazi fulfilled its role as a listener very conscientiously. It looked at me quietly without speaking, and just told me four words with its eyes, 'Have hope.'
Yes, it didn't say a word, but I saw these four words, have hope.
When the rooster crows, it gets up, stands opposite me and draws a big circle with its two small arms, then points to its own fingers, then gestures at me, raises its head as if drinking water, and I nod with a smile.
: "Yes, I can drink..."
It patted my head like a little adult, and then pointed in the direction of the forest. It raised its feet like a white shadow and disappeared out of my sight. I stood up slowly holding on to the wall until
It ran far away, and then I felt the coldness in my body again. I exhaled a long breath. I raised my feet and walked slowly back to the yard. The snail girl who helped me was Xiao Gazi. It gave me spiritual enlightenment again, and,
It also knows that I can't digest too much at once, and adheres to the principle of moisturizing things quietly. It only puts a drop of blood into the water tank at a time, just...
I lowered my eyes and looked at my right hand, which was still numb. The yin and yang roots were broken, and no one would come to teach me the Dharma anymore. In the future, I might still be able to help people pinch the time, but I definitely wouldn’t be able to draw talismans or do the Dharma. Think about it.
, I used to be an onmyoji and it was so easy to do, but now it seems so difficult and out of reach.
But within the scope of Xiao Gazi's ability, it has helped me enough. If it were not for its blood, I think it would not be a big deal if Zhu Auntie's family was beaten to death. Maybe Xiao Gazi is just like me.
It’s the same as all the respected elders, like grandma, or like the three old fairies, Mr. Nan, Uncle Chou... Without exception, they all wish me well. I am their hope, but maybe that’s all.
Hope, it makes me feel that I am becoming more and more disappointed in myself despite the heavy trust in my life.
"Jiaolong, where have you been..."
After entering the house, the third sister rubbed her eyes and got up from the kang. When she saw my face clearly, she was so frightened that she turned pale: "What happened to your face! Jiaolong! Did you fall?"
"It's okay."
I responded with a chuckle, and looked at the broken mirror on the wardrobe. Inside, there were still a few blood channels slipping down from my forehead on my face. It looked like I had escaped from a murderer.
I wet the towel and wiped it. I looked back at San Meier's panicked face and still raised my lips: "San Meier, we must have hope. Life will give us hope..."
"Jiaolong, did you have something wrong with your head?"
Third sister looked at me in shock: "By the way, is it that water? You drank too much of that Shibuya water, so you are not normal now?!"
I looked at her with a smile and held her hand: "No, that's what I want to say to you, you have to have hope, eh?!"
The third sister swallowed her saliva, looked at me half-understanding, and nodded: "Oh."
I didn't say anything. From her probing eyes, I could tell that she thought I had a short-circuit in my brain. This is normal. I have been here for so long and I have always been bored and rarely spoke.
I came back with a bloody head and told her with a smile that there was hope, how could she not be afraid?
Third Sister stared at me nervously for two days, and until she was sure that I was normal, she seemed to let out a sigh of relief and continued to work with Aunt Zhu on the two of them. Of course I knew she was staring at me.
If a person has been dull for a long time and suddenly smiles, it must be a mental problem. But I have no way to tell her that my temporary good mood is all because of the little gazi.
There seemed to be hope and nothing had changed. For the first time during the Chinese New Year, it was just me and Sanmei'er. We cooked dumplings and held hands while watching other people's whipping in the village. Sanmei'er couldn't help but cry beside me.
, I look at the fireworks in the sky but I can’t cry. Many times, I feel that I am too emotional, but the more I cry, the tear ducts are not as developed as before. For the Chinese New Year, I only go to the village canteen to cry out.
I made a phone call to my mother. I asked about my grandpa and told her that I was still busy. My mother blamed me for saying that I was busy during the New Year. She hadn’t seen me for a long time. I smiled and replied that I would go back after I was done.
.
My mother asked me mysteriously if I was looking after some big official. Why was there no news about me at all? Otherwise, if I had done something big, I would have reported it. Just when I was about to reply, I heard my grandpa speaking.
The other end of the phone called Jiaolong, hurry up and eat! Xiaobai is here!
I was stunned, "Is Cheng Baize gone?"
"No." My mother replied in a low voice: "Zong Bao, your grandfather thought Zong Bao was a noob because he was angry with that little Nicole and kept scorning her and saying little
What’s Ni’s name, Xiao Shu? I’m confused.”
I said oh, "But they just got married, why did they come to our house to celebrate the New Year?"
"I don't know. Zong Bao just said that he would come to celebrate the New Year when you were not here, otherwise he would be afraid that your grandpa and I would not be happy. He also said that he would spend the New Year here next year. If I add it up, you will come back next year.
Why he still said this, I don’t understand, Jiaolong, don’t you want to stay outside for several years?”
I lowered my eyes: "That's right, Mom, you don't have to worry too much about me. I'll go back when I'm done. Where is Zong Bao? I want to talk to Zong Bao..."
"Hey, wait a minute, Zong...Xiaobai! Answer the phone!!"
When Zong Bao's voice came from the phone, I felt a little uncomfortable: "Thank you, you even came to my house during the Chinese New Year."
Zong Bao didn't answer the phone for a long time. I thought it was because the signal was not good, so I called him twice, and then Zong Bao lowered his voice and said, "Are you over there, okay?"
I looked back at the village wall and the big red words "Fu" posted everywhere, and twitched my lips: "It's pretty good..."
"Can I see the TV?"
"able……"
"What shall we have for New Year's Eve dinner?"
"Dumplings."
He became silent again, and I cleared my throat: "After celebrating New Year's Eve at my house, take Xiaoni back to your house as soon as possible. How can you take your new daughter-in-law to someone else's house to celebrate the New Year? Your parents know it.
, will be unhappy."
"Don't mind my business. If you have the ability, come back and take care of it."
I rolled my eyes, pressed my red eyes, and laughed heartily: "I'm not going back. It's a good place here, and the villagers all like me."
"Who can believe it? Everyone who likes you is here. Where are you? Can you give me your address?"
"If you don't have an address, you don't need to add it up. Don't come to me. Okay, I'll hang up. Long distance is quite expensive."
"Hey, wait a minute, do you know about Zhuo Jing?"
"Do not want to know."
"Wait! Let me tell you, he asked Xiao Tian to come to the store to find me and asked me to meet him. Xiao Tian said that Zhuo Jing has some impressions of the people around you, but he doesn't know why he
There will be these impressions, so he keeps looking for these people who he doesn’t know why they are related to him, you know!”
"So, what do you want to tell me."
"That's right, he may have forgotten it temporarily, but according to his character, he will definitely want to open the black hole in his memory. After all, forgetting some things is very unpleasant, and searching for the truth is an instinctive behavior, right?"
I took a breath and said, "Did you go to see him?"
"I didn't. What's the point of seeing him? Didn't you tell me not to tell me? I just gave the shares you asked me to transfer to Xiao Tian. That hot spring is very popular now. What did Xiao Tian say?
I don’t understand the listing, but what it means is that if you sign, the shares in your hand are equivalent to tens of millions or even hundreds of millions of assets!"
Hundreds of millions, why do I sound like I'm talking about a book from heaven? It has nothing to do with me.
"What are you talking about? The money doesn't belong to me. Well, I'm done. Third sister is still waiting for me to go back for dinner."
"By the way, there is one more thing I want to tell you. That Xiaobei, she came here shortly after you left and said she wanted to find a job. I remembered that you told her that she could be used, so I asked her to work there.
The store helped.”
I hummed, chatted for a few more words and hung up the phone. If Xu Linlin died, Xiaobei would naturally come to see me. What I said couldn't be ignored.
During the vigil, Sanmei'er asked me if I liked celebrating the New Year. She said that every time she celebrated the Chinese New Year, her father would buy her a lot of gifts and take her to travel abroad. As he talked, she would burst into tears.
I said that I don’t like Chinese New Year very much. Except when I was a kid in the countryside, I knew I had to kowtow to my grandma and grandpa on New Year’s Eve to get lucky money. I don’t like the rest of the New Year. Every year is accompanied by loneliness and depression.
, especially the year of my birth year, and my father passed away, so I can’t be more curious about the year.
Sanmei'er sighed and replied, "In the end, I'll say the mantra she's accustomed to saying again, it will be fine, everything will be fine."
I don’t know if it’s good or not, but people have a little hope in their hearts that they can be considered motivated to live. I would fill the water tank with water at night before going to bed and wait for the little one to come, and then I would hold it and chat in the corner at the entrance of the courtyard.
For a few hours, I didn’t tell anyone about this secret, including my enlightenment that had returned. Needless to say, Xiao Gazi’s spirituality, maybe it was the blood it once gave me, so I felt like it when I drank the water in the tank.
Sweet, of course, it tastes astringent when others drink it. Sanmei'er has always wondered why I like to drink Shibujing water, but she saw that there was nothing wrong with my body and stopped pursuing me.
During the Chinese New Year, in addition to burning paper for Uncle Chou, I would also send some to my grandma at the intersection in the village. I hoped that my grandma would give me a dream and let me see her, but I never dreamed about her.
Maybe grandma also knows that if she lets me see her at this time, I will lose control of my emotions.
We rely on mountains to eat, and we rely on water to drink water. We have mountains at our backs, and naturally we have to rely on the original ecological mountains to support ourselves. Throughout the year, in addition to planting one-third of an acre of land at home, villagers have to go to the mountains to collect mountain products.
Create additional income.
Rong Danfeng, the third sister, is naturally a descendant of a businessman with excellent genes. In winter, she felt that it was inconvenient for our family to go to town without a carriage, so she could only bear to take the mountain goods she had worked so hard to collect from the village chief's eldest son.
I would send it to the freight station, but as soon as the spring came, she couldn't hold it anymore. I basically took over the responsibility of visiting Old Chou Uncle's grave every day, while she devoted herself to the family business. Of course, she also felt that
It’s inconvenient for me to have wild vegetables and matsutake mushrooms in my hands, plus I’ve had a broken leg and she’s worried that I might be in trouble, so my daily task is to climb the mountain and sit on Uncle Chou’s grave and talk, and she does it every two or three days.
She spent more time hunting for treasures in the mountains. Yes, she called these mountain treasures treasures.
Once she actually walked several hours of mountain roads to the town to negotiate a consignment company, which was equivalent to indirectly cutting off the village eldest son's home, which was a profitable consignment center. She happily told me that day.
Said, Jiaolong, we are going to be rich. Do you know how black the village chief's son is? Oh my God, he is making huge profits. How can these villagers tolerate being deceived by him?
I looked at her with a smile: "People didn't say that you, a little girl, are amazing."
The third sister also laughed and pointed at her face: "I'm praised for my magical powers. Who knew that I would be reaching my thirties!"
I pouted: "Thirty is still early, but you did take advantage of it. I'll send you to study. Maybe you can get into that Mensa."
"I'm not going. I'm just going to let the villagers who help me earn more money, so that I don't have to live my life here all over again."
I patted her shoulder, which was still growing: "Yes, the villagers here will be grateful to you in the future."
San Meier is a person who dares to think and act. Perhaps it should be said that the real Rong Danfeng is full of positive energy. She encouraged Aunt Zhu to use her carriage to pull these mountain goods to the town. Aunt Zhu was still hesitant at first.
Yes, I said no, but when I came back, my face was full of joy. I heard that if these things were sent to the receiving station run by the village chief’s son, I would only be given 500 yuan, but I went to the town and I was so happy.
She earned an extra thousand yuan. Of course she was laughing in her dreams because of such good money. So San Meier took her partner, Aunt Zhu, and started having sex passionately. She even said,
If she expands her scale, she will definitely open her own receiving station.
Aunt Zhu said that San Mei'er would become a human being after she regained her consciousness. All the ideas she proposed were accepted, but only for the receiving station, Aunt Zhu disagreed. She said that the village chief would not approve it and she would earn it by herself.
Just some money.
Sanmei'er had an idea in mind. She smiled silly, discussed it again, discussed it again, and secretly told me behind my back that before we left, we must resolve the matter at the receiving station, otherwise the people in this village would have to
Although they were quite happy to be poor, she felt uncomfortable. Sanmeier's famous saying, people have the right to pursue a higher material life, why should the village chief squeeze them?
I didn't express an opinion. This is a matter of fighting or suffering. Conservative thinking will make people have a lazy thinking, and even muddle along. A small amount of wealth means peace, not even wealth, but you are poor, I am poor, and everyone is like this.
,So, this is not something that one person can fight for. The people want it, and they are not oppressed. Maybe some people think that the receiving station opened by the village chief’s son is really convenient for everyone. The more you earn, the less you earn.
Just earn it.
Rong Danfeng in San Meier's body has lived in a fast-paced city for a long time, so he naturally knows how to discover and create. However, the busy traffic is not the work of one person, and the high-rise buildings are not built by one person, but are driven by the environment. To put it bluntly,
, people in the city seem to be obsessed with money, study hard, work hard, just because of competition, but the environment here is like this, there is no competition, no pressure, work at sunrise,
Rest after sunset, playing small cards, bragging, people are beautiful, unless the village chief's mind changes, otherwise, one person cannot change the minds of a whole village.
At the beginning, I had no motivation to change this village, because I came from a mixed background, and the optimism in my bones had long been worn away by the things that happened to me. But it wasn’t until I met a child that I
Gradually, I feel that this village may really not be able to continue to be so 'unenterprising'. (To be continued)