Every day I am with Qing, I am happy and fulfilled. WWW.tsxsw.COM However, every day, I fall asleep in the midst of contradictions and struggles. Thinking about Qing and I, it seems that there is no future. At this moment, everything

Everything is, as Jin Xi said, "it's urgent, let's look at the present", and it's also the enthusiasm and hopelessness of "fighting for a lifetime to have fun for you for one day". Especially when Fangruo comes to visit me, tell me anything that has anything to do with me.

The past was closely related to the affairs of the palace. I was shocked time and again to realize that my body, hair and skin were all deeply imprinted with the past.

I don’t know how I should break away from my own identity, and how he should break away from his own identity. Such an annoying identity makes me embarrassed and ashamed.

But every day when I woke up, I saw the meager morning light filtering in through the window lattice. Thinking that I might be able to see him again this day, my whole person was immersed in great joy and sweetness.

How sweet is it? Every moment I am with Qing, my heart is swollen and I feel relaxed and happy. No worries in this world will come to me.

Sometimes, I wish I was an ignorant woman with no morality, no sense of shame, no sense of right and wrong, and even... no memory. In this way, I would not be in pain or sad.

If possible, I would trade everything I have now for the happiness of knowing each other and being with Qing.

I am willing.

On this day, I almost wandered with him, sleepless and restless. I just felt that being held by his hand like this was a huge happiness.

The mountain road is rugged and winding all the way up from the forest. The stone slabs that have not been walked on for many years are covered with thick moss, making it very difficult to walk step by step. Above the head are strange and messy branches stretching towards the sky, with a faint light.

The shadow fell on the ground like a ghostly and terrifying arm, but the trees on the arm were all covered with goose-yellow and dark green leaves, brittle, tender and bright. There were unknown birds chirping deep in the branches.

, giving the cold and silent dusk in the valley an indescribable tenderness and vitality. There are several newly bloomed impatiens in the mountains, blooming vaguely among the weeds, as bright and bright as fire.

At that time, the sun was setting over the west mountain, and the afterglow was like gold. For half the day, there was a dazzling sunset, bright red, emerald yellow, purple gold, bright blue, soft pink, like the most brilliant and gorgeous tapestry... The top of the mountain in front of him

The colorful clouds are condensed with incomparable beauty, as if they can be reached with one hand. Behind me, there is a dark and gloomy sky that is about to fall into the night. The ink-colored clouds are sweeping like smoke, and they are so low that they seem to be pressed down.

The last ray of golden rays enveloped him. He turned around and looked at me. His face could not be seen clearly in the backlight. He slowly stretched out his hand to me, "The mountain road is difficult, so I will hold your hand."

His body was as bright and majestic as a god in the twilight, and the mountain wind whimpered as it passed between us. His broad sleeves were slightly swollen by the wind, fluttering like three feet of clear water.

I felt my heart skip a beat, surrounded by twilight and the infinitely soft summer breeze, so quiet that I could hear my own breathing. I hesitated to reach out my hands, so I held them secretly, my palms sweating.

There was a faint sound of singing coming from the long river at the foot of the mountain, and gradually I could hear it clearly. It turned out that it was Anu singing again, and it was exactly the folk song she had been singing: "Little sister treats her lover - the kindness is deep, you must not

When you betray a girl, you have to treat her well when you see her. When you don't see her, you have to bear it in your heart seventeen or eighteen times every day!"

That song seemed to be engraved in my heart. When I heard it, I couldn't help but feel excited and speechless for a while.

His eyes were as clear as water, so clear, and his voice was as gentle as the warm wind in April, saying softly, "Listen."

I replied in a low voice: "I heard it."

His hand stretched forward further, almost touching the sleeve of my robe. He was so close to me, and he said: "I have the same thoughts towards you." When he saw that I was silent, his face turned slightly gloomy, "That moment

The "Jasper Song" you wrote to me that day - I am so grateful for the love of my husband, but I am ashamed of myself. After reading the entire "Yuefu", I have never been so afraid of this sentence."

I raised my face to look at him, and slowly stretched out my delicate white hands from under the gray Buddhist robes. After being vegetarian for a long time, my hands were so pale, so thin that they revealed the delicate blue blood, flowing and reflecting the gleaming rays of the sun.

I looked directly at him, my frantic heart slowly calmed down, a smile bloomed like a flower on my cheek, and my voice was as tough as the silken cattails beside the water. "This time it's me, what I want to say is - when I see a gentleman, I will

Hu Buxi."

The evening breeze ruffled the dim corners of the Buddha's robe, and a few wisps of joy floated in my heart. My love for Xuanqing has always been the blood that surged secretly in my veins. But now, I have been hiding what I want to say in my heart.

After I said it all, I felt indescribable joy and relief, and I just looked at him with a smile.

His face showed such gentleness and surprise, as gentle as jade. Under the gradually darkening sky, it was as bright as the brightest and brightest sunshine in summer, and he couldn't help but feel joyful.

My smile overflowed from my heart and spread to every inch of my body.

He held my hand tightly and was so happy that he couldn't say anything, he just looked at me with a smile.

His hand was so hot and so big, it seemed that my hand was too small to hold.

His clean and warm breath filled my side, and I suddenly leaned forward, burying my face in his chest. He hugged me tightly, my hair caressed his chin, and he said in his ear: "Let's go together."

"

My heart seemed to have been hit by something, there was a dull pain, and my nose was sore.

In fact, I don’t know where we can go. I am the deposed concubine who was expelled from the palace by the emperor to practice spiritual practice. He is the elegant and jade-like prince of the Tianhuang noble family. As Jin Xi said, "The burning eyebrows are burning, let's take care of the present."

That's all.

But now, listening to him speaking so solemnly, I felt comforted and comfortable. I also had a glimmer of imagination to rely on for the distant future.

The mountain breeze whistled in my ears, and the scattered impatiens flowers that had just bloomed were bright and moving, and their beauty was like smoke. He held my hand and walked step by step to the top of the mountain, looking back at me every step he took.

He suddenly stopped, spread out my fingers one by one, put each of his fingers in it, and intertwined the ten fingers. I was slightly confused and just looked at him. Xuan Qing's words were tough and persistent, and he smiled.

: "This kind of hand-holding gesture is called 'concentric clasp'. It is said that men and women who hold hands and walk like this will never be separated even in life and death."

There was a feeling of confusion in my heart, as if I had jumped into the sea, splashing huge and jumping snow-white water, just like my joyful and shaking mood at the moment. Then when I opened my eyes, I saw clusters of radiant corals on the seabed, stretching out in style around me, and fish swimming around me.

Happy. It's like being in a dream, but you can reach out and touch it.

It was really like a dream! My heart suddenly moved, and I suddenly thought: "Qing, I always feel like I am dreaming. Can you bite me or pinch me? Let me know that I am not here."

dream."

Xuanqing lowered his head and kissed my nose, and laughed softly: "I don't want to give up." I suddenly felt stupid. Why was I so stupid? Even I was embarrassed and wanted to laugh at myself. My face turned red, even worse than last night.

When I arrived, the sky was filled with clouds of fire, burning my face with such scorching heat.

He kept smiling softly. His smile was so beautiful, like a clear song in the clouds, resounding throughout the sky. My face became hot, and I became more eloquent. I stared at him and said, "Qing, you smile so well."

nice."

I used to feel this way, but I never dared to admit it. Alas, I am getting more and more stupid when talking in front of him now, and I really talk stupidly.

Xuanqing clasped my hand, smiled softly and sighed, "My smile is because of you!"

It's because of me. However, the sincere smile that blooms at this moment is also for him! I feel slightly shy, and I look down and see the simplest mango shoes on my feet, stepping on the thick moss, feeling happy every step of the way.

Suddenly I remembered that Xuan Ling had given me a pair of shoes when I was favored. The soles were made of vegetable jade, lined with spices, and the dazzling Hepu Pearl shone on the toe. The uppers were made of gold-staggered Shu brocade embroidered with mandarin ducks and lotus flowers.

Shu brocade has always been praised as "the silk brocade is so perfect that it washes the river waves", not to mention the Shu brocade embroidered with gold and gold. It takes three years for a hundred women in Shu to embroider one piece. The price of an inch is as much as a bucket of gold. It has always been in the palace.

It is not easy to even meet a woman, let alone to make shoes as luxurious as hers.

However, the joy and emotion in my heart right now is not worth receiving such a special favor. In my heart, I just feel that the lotus blossoming in such exquisite embroidered shoes is not as warm as a pair of mango shoes walking hand in hand with him.

He watched the sunset with me, stroked my hair, and said softly: "You have been walking for a day, are you tired?"

I couldn't help but smile from the corners of my eyes and eyebrows, and said, "I'm not tired."

"Then", he said suddenly, "come with me to Anqi to see my mother and concubine."

I was stunned for a moment, layers of red clouds appeared on my face, and I said shyly: "How can I be embarrassed to go?"

He took my hand and said with a smile: "Concubine I have always liked you." Seeing my shyness, he said, "Concubine I am a magnanimous person. Besides, Huan'er, you don't know how happy I am when I get you.

I am anxious to tell my mother and concubine that your son has found the person he wants most in the world!"

I smiled, even though my identity was unknown. How could I refuse his joy and affection? So I lowered my eyebrows shyly and said softly: "Okay."

Anqiguan is still the same as yesterday, but my mood when I went to see Concubine Shu Gui was completely different. There was still a trace of unspeakable nervousness. I knocked the door, and it was Jiuyun who came out to open the door. I saw Xuanqing and I together.

When he arrived, he couldn't help but be surprised and said: "What a coincidence today, the prince and the lady are here together."

Xuan Qing smiled but did not answer, and only said: "Where is the mother and concubine?"

Jiuyun smiled and said, "The concubine has just finished chanting sutras and is drinking tea."

It was summer, and the windows in Anqiguanli were open. Because of the dense trees around, the cool breeze was very cool. There were many lotus flowers in the jars in the courtyard, which were small and delicate, but also very cute.

The concubine was sitting cross-legged on the couch drinking tea. When she saw us coming, she just waved and said with a smile: "You came just in time, Cuiyun is making lily soup." After saying this, she greeted Cuiyun and brought up two bowls.

Xuan Qing said: "Let me bow to my mother and concubine first."

I bowed Yingying and said, "Well, my concubine is well."

I have always been familiar with Anqiguan, and when we meet, we just give a common courtesy. Now I gave a big ceremony solemnly, Princess Shu Gui couldn't help being shocked, she just looked at me and said with a smile: "What's going on today?"

"

Before Xuan Qing could wait for me to stand up, he bowed to the end and said, "Greetings to my mother and concubine." After saying this, he supported me and stood up hand in hand.

The concubine suddenly understood and couldn't help but put her hands on her forehead and said with a smile on her face: "Okay! Okay! We are finally together." As she said this, she called to Jiuyun and said: "Forget the lily soup, replace it with red dates and white fungus!"

My face was flushed, and I whispered: "Thank you, Princess." I lowered my head and said with a smile: "Listening to the tone of the Princess just now, it seems that she already knew that Qing and I were..." I was embarrassed, so I stopped talking and only glanced at Xuan Qing.

Xuan Qing hurriedly waved his hands and said, "I didn't say that."

The concubine smiled and said: "Qing'er didn't tell me anything. It's just that you played the piano and flute in harmony that day, and you had a good understanding. Do you really think that I can't see anything when I'm old? The understanding of the heart is supposed to be affection.

Only those who are connected will have the same understanding."

My face turned red and I said, "The concubine has good eyesight."

The concubine held my hand and asked me to come closer, and said lovingly: "Good boy, I just had this thought that day, but I didn't expect that you and I would still have such a fate." She looked at Xuan Qing with a smile and said, "Silly boy.

, you didn’t tell me earlier, I only know now, it’s really hard for me to hide it.”

Xuan Qing was a little embarrassed, glanced at me, and said: "This matter has taken a turn for the worse, and it has just been settled. My son quickly brought Huan'er over to pay his respects to his mother and concubine."

The concubine looked at me with joy on her face and said, "Huan'er, I will call you that now." Then she sighed and said, "Huan'er, you are a smart child, and I like you from the bottom of my heart. I just heard about it a little bit.

, you are also a child with a hard life. My Qing'er, who left me when he was young, is also a child with a hard life. He has been looking for a good woman of his choice for many years, but he still refuses to get married at such an old age.

As a mother-in-law, I am also very worried..."
To be continued...