That night, Jin Xi saw that I had not eaten, so she served a bowl of Tremella fungus and comforted me by saying: "I hope you can eat something, please don't hurt your body." She sighed sadly, "Your Majesty, you are safe.
Returning is certainly a good thing, but...it’s God’s will that makes you come back.”
Huanbi hugged her knees and sat on the edge of the couch. The smile at the corner of her mouth was replaced by the endless sadness and worry in her eyes. "I'm afraid that the prince is very sad. Miss..." She looked at me, moved the corner of her mouth, but finally did not say anything.
I fiddled with the snow-white white fungus in the lamp, and I felt that people were being manipulated like this one, without any control over themselves. After a long time, I whispered: "I didn't know you wanted me to persuade him, but when it came to
Now, what's the use of talking to each other even if we have no place to meet each other? Even if he knows about all my difficulties, I can't even save him."
Huanbi carefully looked at my expression and said, "The seven-day lost soul is still kept at Jin Xi's place..." She bit her lip, "If the young lady eats it, no matter what the imperial edict is, it will be over."
My heart moved, and I stood up unconsciously, but I was immediately horrified, "I am already the concubine, and he is the envoy. I died of a sudden illness, how could he get away with it? Even you and Jin Xi ended up like this
The crime of poor service." I sat down slumped, stroking my cheeks and said, "I am no longer a useless concubine that no one cares about. As long as I get seriously ill, the emperor will send many doctors to check it out, and even Wen Shichu will be implicated. What's more,
Apart from him, how many relationships do I have that I can't let go of?" After saying this, I felt even more upset, and I just held the silk tightly and remained silent.
Huanbi seemed unwilling to give in, "Miss..."
"There is more than one prince in the world who cares about me enough. Miss Bi, please just think about Gu Jiayi." Jin Xi stroked my back and said gently: "Your Majesty, please don't get yourself into trouble. I would like to ask your Majesty to think about this."
Can the imperial edict be ignored? If the empress feels that she can let go of everything, the servant will immediately pack the burden for the empress, and just follow the prince to the end of the world. Even if she is caught and sentenced to death in the future, one day of happiness is still one day of happiness, and it is not in vain.
In this life, if the empress cares about the weight of this imperial edict, then think twice before acting."
A thin roll of yellow silk is embroidered with the pattern of two dragons holding beads with lake blue and light gold threads. Each claw and scale is lifelike, majestic and full of royal majesty. A few lines of words are written in block letters, for
It was solemn, and every word was Xuan Ling's own handwriting, rather than a crown article drafted by the Ministry of Rites. My fingertips brushed the silk, and I trembled slightly. In just a few lines, my life has been settled. If I want to change my life,
Head, if I want to flinch... my eyes will almost bleed.
Jinxi held my hand, looked at Huanbi, and then at me, "Miss Bi's concerns are not unreasonable. The prince is so sad and angry. There are some things that the queen cannot say, but there are some things that can be said.
To some extent, it can make the prince stop thinking about it. Otherwise, we will meet in the palace in the future, and we must leave room for each other to see each other, so why bother to be sad and tormented."
Huanbi opened the window, and the night wind suddenly poured in, bringing with it the frost-like cold moon all over the ground. Huanbi leaned against the window and looked at the moon, and the undulating mountains were like giant beasts lying silently, waiting for an opportunity to engulf people. Huanbi's
Sighing like the cold light of the cold moon falling to the ground, he said sadly: "At this moment, the prince must be very sad."
I was startled. If it was true as Jin Xi said, he would not be sad anymore if he could end his love for me.
I turned my head solemnly, looked at Huanbi's delicate face, and said softly: "Huanbi..."
After Li Chang passed the order, there were dozens of soldiers guarding the outside of Ganlu Temple. Jinxi had already given instructions outside, asking Huanbi to go to Lingyun Peak to collect some old belongings.
Huanbi went there and brought a bag of clothes. Jinxi flipped through it casually, leaned against the window and frowned and said loudly: "My lady, it's true, these things are obviously the wrong ones. Please ask the girl to bring some summer clothes for the queen."
The clothes came, but the girl brought a bag of big winter sweater clothes. It’s really..."
Huanbi got angry and said loudly: "Didn't I get the wrong clothes? I'll just go back one more time." After that, she whispered in my ear: "I have asked the prince to wait by the river. Miss, go quickly.
stop."
I put on the green cloak that Huanbi had just worn when I went out. My hair was tied loosely, as if I was angry with someone, and I walked out angrily. I was similar in stature to Huanbi, but the thick night covered it even more.
The guard knew that Huanbi was my personal maid, so naturally he didn't dare to stop me and let me go all the way.
The road to the Changhe River has long been familiar, but it has never been as difficult as tonight. The evening wind rustled my cloak, and my heart was beating so fast. I couldn't wait to see him, but I had no face to do so.
Once you see her, you will be sad, and the world will be embarrassing. Perhaps, even if you see her, you will feel like you have never seen her again.
The cool gurgling sound of the river can be heard from a distance. Looking from a distance, his figure looks particularly lonely in the bright night, like a desolate silhouette.
His waiting posture aroused all my tender memories and longings at that moment. He had waited for me like this so many times. But his posture had never been as barren as it is today.
His dim face suddenly brightened up the moment he saw me, like a blazing tree flame, instantly lighting up the sky. He took a few steps forward and breathed a heavy sigh of relief, "You are finally willing to see me."
I said coldly: "Seeing that you are safe, I can feel no guilt and return to the palace with peace of mind."
His eyes flickered slightly, and his smile turned cold, "Just for this?"
I smiled sadly, "Otherwise, why does the prince think I came here at night?"
The moonlight was like silver, and his clear eyes never let go of me, "We haven't seen each other for a long time, and you don't ask me why I went there?"
"Is it important?" I tried to separate the distance between me and him with a distant smile. "After I return to the palace, the emperor will be happy to talk to me about this matter. Besides, whether you ask or not, there is nothing you and I can do to save everything.
It’s a dead end, and seeing you standing in front of me safe and sound, I have nothing to worry about.”
The gloomy look in his eyes lit up slightly, like a dancing candlelight, "You have nothing to worry about because I am safe and sound. You know that everyone said that I was dead that day, so you must have been worried about me day and night. Huan'er..."
I panicked and wanted to hide myself in my cloak, so I immediately turned around and said, "I've heard that the prince has seven orifices in his heart, so I know he's really careless."
There was unbearable eagerness and disbelief in his tone, "Huan'er, you and I have always been in love with each other. Today you suddenly returned to the palace and deliberately ignored me. Huan'er..."
At the beginning of summer, the flowers are blooming like clouds. The flowers are also called Buddha's smile, so they are blooming all over the mountains and plains around Ganlu Temple. There are huge handfuls of snow-white and light yellow flowers that look like a blur of snow in the night.
Fan Yang. I had to stop what he was saying and said bluntly: "The flowers have bloomed. Qing, our fate is really over."
The mountain wind was strong at night, blowing bulgingly against the cheeks, as if someone's palm slapped hard on the face, causing sharp pain in both cheeks. There was a moment of silence, like the whimpering of a river flowing eastward and unable to turn back.
. His voice was cold and cold, like the cold snow accumulated on blue and white porcelain, "In the past, you said that you never believed in fate when it comes to the relationship between men and women. Only those who are weak and unwilling to fight for it will use fate as an excuse.
"Using deep fate as an excuse to get close, and using lack of fate as a pretext to end affection."
The wind was mixed with the faint fragrance of tea flowers. That kind of fragrance was the strenuous struggle in prosperity and decline. I said lightly: "I also said, maybe one day we will reach a point where there is no way to go and there is no solution.
I will say that our fate has ended. Or..." I suppressed the pain in my heart, "Qing, I can really tell you that I just want to end my relationship with you." I pressed my lower abdomen and said in a low voice.
: "Li Chang must have told you that I am three months pregnant. At three months, you should know that this child is not yours."
He turned his head slumped, and couldn't hide the frustration and pain in his voice, "Yes, three months, even after I left for more than a month, you are with the emperor." He held my hand, and he
His hands were so cold, and the ice-like chill was forced from his fingertips to my heart, "Huan'er, everyone thinks I'm dead, that doesn't matter. There's nothing wrong with you wanting to protect yourself and survive, I just
I feel sorry for you. You are a person who gave up your life from Ziao City. Why do you have to go back to the sad place to work hard? I really can't bear it... I would rather Wen Shichu take care of you all my life. At least, he treats you sincerely."
"Wen Shichu?" I said lightly, "What I want can only be given to me by your royal brother. The lives of my father and brother, the livelihood of my Zhen family, and the glory and wealth I want. I have suffered in Ganlu Temple for several years.
Despite all the insults and glares, I no longer want to let people eat meat! I am afraid of living a life where people are used as swordsmen and I am used as fish meat. Why don’t I be used as swordsmen and people are used as fish meat——"
He looked at me closely, and his amber eyes could see through almost all my disguises. I unconsciously turned my head away to avoid his unavoidable eyes. "I believe everything you say, but Huan'er
, How could glory and wealth ever come into your eyes? If you insist on using these words to lower yourself, wouldn’t it also lower my affection for you? How could the woman that I, Xuanqing, truly love, be such a person?"
I was cruel and forced myself to smile with arrogance and disdain, "Then, Your Majesty, you have really misjudged the wrong person. Zhen Huan is also an ordinary person. She wants to live, to live well, and to have people around her.
If you live a good life, you don’t want to be trampled on by others.”
For a long time, he sighed sadly, his slightly raised eyes seemed to be looking up at the distant sky with twinkling stars. His expression was a bit melancholy and intoxicated, and he said in a low voice: "That day when I first saw you, you were washing your feet by the spring.
It's so bright and gorgeous, as quiet as the cherry blossoms blooming deep in the courtyard, and as charming as a little white fox."
I lowered my eyes, and the beautiful two-color hibiscus shoes on my feet were wet with dew, staining the double lotus embroidered with gold thread, which shone brightly in the moonlight. My feet were no longer wearing shoes, and even a trace of gold thread could
Remind me of the constraints of today. I am no longer a useless concubine with no one to care about me, and I am no longer Zhen Huan who lives alone in Ling Yunfeng. I pinched my palms and said coldly: "Maybe the cruel Zhen Huan today was not the little girl in your heart back then.
Little white fox." I smiled sadly and slowly looked up at him, "Actually, what you said is quite right. Am I not as cunning as a fox?"
The ten fingers he held on my wrist were like frozen stone sculptures, motionless. The night wind blew down the large white clouds of tea flowers, and when they fell into the long river, only a little white shadow appeared, and then they went away with the flowing water.
. His voice was a little hollow, like this empty and silent night in the mountains, "That day my boat sank in the Tengsha River. The river was so strong that everyone was washed away. If I hadn't known a little about water since I was a child,
, I was afraid that I would sink into the Tengsha River. I finally swam to the shore, but I was already exhausted, and was subdued by Hehe Xizuo who was ambushing around me. In order to prevent me from resisting, they forced me to take Shixiang Ruanjin San along the way.
He was taken to Hehe in southern Yunnan." He glanced at me and said, "Do you know who the man you and I met in Huishan that day was?"
I concentrated on thinking, "Looking at his clothes and demeanor, he must be a very prestigious person in the country..." Suddenly my heart moved, and I looked at Xuan Qing and said, "Could it be..."
"Yes! He is none other than the illustrious Khan King Moge. As early as the day of Huishan, he had already speculated that I was an important person in the court. It just so happened that the emperor's brother sent me to southern Yunnan, so I fell into his trap.
He plotted against me." Xuan Qing secretly gritted his teeth and frowned, "Since he knows my identity, he has used me to join the throne, and he intends to use my identity as a prince to blackmail the emperor's brother and control southern Yunnan."
Without thinking, I blurted out: "The Emperor will not agree."
There was a dark glow in Xuan Qing's eyes, flowing like bright stars, "He will naturally not agree. In his eyes, how can a brother reach such a great place, let alone... that brother is me."
My sigh was swallowed up by the gentle waves of the river, "The battle for the throne many years ago - I'm afraid that if He He really kills you, it will be a big stone in his heart."
He nodded, "Since Hehe knows my identity and origin, I have naturally become a useless person in their eyes. There is no need to bother to know that the emperor brother has taken me hostage. Probably they are just waiting for the two armies to meet in the future and use me as a formation."
As a former hostage, it’s all about how much you earn. I was detained in Hehe, and that day I snatched a horse out of the house when no one was watching, and I ran day and night to the border of Shangjing before I found peace." He smiled bitterly, "At that time, people in the country were
Everyone thought that I had died in southern Yunnan, and the guards who went to Beijing thought that I had returned as a ghost. I was afraid that you would be sad to wait, so I traveled back to Beijing day and night. I expected to come to see you when I saw the emperor brother, but who knew that on the day of my return to Beijing, the emperor brother
After being overjoyed, the first thing I entrusted to me was to go to Ganlu Temple to welcome a new favorite for him." His expression was full of scorched gray pain, "I didn't know that the emperor's new favorite is you."
I am filled with sadness, but this sadness is filled with resentment and sadness towards the world. But who can I blame? People are like chess pieces in the palm of their hand. They often cannot help themselves, but they have to move forward alone.
I looked at him, and the months of sorrow turned into just two lines of clear tears, silently soaking my clothes.
His palms had residual warmth and thin calluses, which wiped away the cold tears on my cheeks. Those were a pair of hands that could hold both a pen and a sword. If Mog hadn't been so despicable as to use Toxiang Ruanjin Powder to restrain him,
He, maybe he would have returned to me early, and there would have been no more bitter ups and downs. However... "if" and "maybe" are such warm and compassionate words. If there were so many assumptions, wouldn't the world be perfect?
There was a gentle sigh in his tone, "You are still willing to cry for me, Huan'er." He clasped my wrist, "I just want to ask you, are you really ruthless to me?"
My breathing became so long that when I looked into his eyes, I couldn't say the word "ruthless" for the life of me.
Even though I have been fighting cruelly in the palace for so many years, I have never stopped pursuing love. But now, I have stopped, and I have to give up all this with my own hands.
I don’t know how long it took, but he hugged me into his arms. His arms were so warm that they seemed to be able to withstand all the wind, frost and swords in this world. Even his breath was the same as before, the refreshing and calm Du Ruo breath, I just wanted to call him
People indulge themselves until they die. His words fall on my ears like a steady spring rain, "Huan'er, it's still too late. As long as you are willing to follow me, I would rather not be Huang Guizhou today to be with you."
The commoner couple lived an ordinary life in the countryside."
Going with him and staying with him till old age is all I have thought about for a long time.
However, today, he actually said it, and these words were like a basin of cold water, suddenly poured on my head, making my whole body tremble and turn around.
I suddenly pulled out of his arms and couldn't bear to see his shocked and disappointed look, and said sadly: "What about being sentimental, what about being ruthless? There is not only one word for love in life." I looked at Anqi Temple on the mountain behind Ganlu Temple,
With a solemn look on his face, he said, "If I leave with you, the first person to be implicated will be your mother who has escaped from the world and practiced spiritual practice. Even if you still want to take the concubine away, what about the others? Can we take everything away?" My voice trembled slightly.
, forced it out from the chest, "Qing, our love cannot be so selfish that we ignore the people around us and cannot sacrifice them to fulfill us." I looked at him, "I can't do it, and you can't do it either."
His expression became more and more sad, but in this sadness, I already understood his recognition and understanding. He is a gentle man, and he is not willing to implicate anyone because of himself. This is his weakness and his preciousness.
Looking out with tears streaming down my face, I saw the bright moon hanging high in the sky, seemingly unaware of the misery of the world, blindly shining brightly, illuminating my and his sadness and forbearance as if there was nowhere to stay.
There were so many tears, and it had been so long since I had indulged myself in crying. I stepped down and leaned on his shoulder, letting my heart become chaotic, and forcing myself to express my remaining calmness, "If I
I can go with you. Why don't I want to leave everything behind and go with you? I don't think about anything, just go with you. But when you and I leave willfully, where do we put the lives of our parents and people? But we put the concubine in the
Where? Once we leave, they will be the ones who suffer the disaster!" Tears clogged my throat, "That's all it used to be." I looked around blankly, "Now, where can we go? The world is so big that it can't accommodate it.
A Xuan Qing cannot tolerate a Zhen Huan. Even if the world can accommodate us, it cannot tolerate the lifelong regret after we leave. Qing cannot be chosen by us, - no, there has never been a choice."
He hugged my shoulders and his voice was as deep as the pouring rain: "Huan'er, even if you tell me that you have never had any affection for me, I won't believe it. But what you told me is more heartless than what you said to me in person.
It also makes me understand that you will never be by my side again."
The night is endless, and the gentle and charming memories of the past seem to bloom bright and fresh flowers one after another in the night sky.
However, I could only watch and let them all wither.
The trees by the river were lush and green, and I whispered: "Look, the leaves and flowers are still thick here, but Xuanqing, April has already changed a lot since you and I said goodbye." God's hand turns the clouds and rain, and brings joy to the world.
, the pain of parting was placed in the palm of my hand and played with it wantonly, I said sadly: "Qing, everything has changed."
He put a little force on his hand and pressed his forehead against mine, "Huan'er, let me hug you again, just for a moment. From now on, I can hug everyone in the world, but I can't give in like this anymore."
You stayed in my arms."
The weakness and tenderness in my heart burst out in an instant, and I murmured in my tears, "Qing, meeting you made me have a dream. How I wish I would never wake up from this dream. The happiest days in my life are all
In this dream, you gave me everything."
He kissed my cheek, "For me, it's not the same." He stared at me tenderly, as if he wanted to embed my image in his mind, "With your words, I will live up to my life."
I couldn't help but stretched out my hand, caressed his face, and said miserably: "Why bother saying such things? Qing, you should find a woman who treats you sincerely, support each other with her, and grow old together. You will have many
My descendants will live a good life and be happy all their lives." I looked up to him and said, "Qing, I will burn incense in front of the Buddha every day and pray for you throughout my life. I only hope that you will be like this."
He covered my lips, and his tearful eyes had a forbearing look, which was as bright as the bright moon in the sky. He said in a low voice: "Are you saying this to hurt my heart? All my thoughts are only there.
It’s all said in a wedding invitation. It’s just you and no one else.”
I couldn't stop my tears, and I paused and said: "You are the one who came to hurt my heart with these words..." There were a few sounds in the sky, and it was the dusky crows returning late that settled on the branches, and the bright moon came towards me again.
The west sank.
There is no time anymore.
I slowly, slowly took off his arm and said with tears in my eyes: "Look, the moon is setting in the west. In another hour, it will be dawn."
He shook his head, his expression as gloomy as the night, and he could no longer see the calm and gentle brilliance. He smiled bitterly, "I just feel like a lonely ghost. The deadline will come as soon as the day breaks. No matter how reluctant I am, I have to do it."
Let you go."
The night gradually receded, like a gentle but urgent urging. I lowered my head and said sadly, "The deadline has arrived. I have been out for a long time. If I don't go back, I'm afraid Jinxi and Huanbi will bear the brunt." My hand fell away from his palm.
I took it out as if I had exhausted all my strength, "Sit together, look at the clouds across the sky, talk, or be silent, and enjoy a moment of peace." I said sadly: "Qing, we can't do this anymore.
.”
There are countless floating shadows of vicissitudes of life in the stream of time. When we meet again, he and I will become the phantoms of Ziao City again, and the tiles and pebbles among the thousands of pearls and gauze will cut off each other's past lives.
The fragrance of the fallen flowers in the silent night is so gentle and gentle, fluttering like a white bird with broken wings. It has long lost its light and free graceful flying, leaving only a sad touch of blood, which disperses all hope.
and happiness collapsed. Only the subversion and cruelty of the world were left, stabbing people one after another.
The first time you wake up, the first time you feel cool in your life.
The night was getting deeper, and there was a broken lamp in the house like a bean, and Jinxi was sitting upright in her clothes. No matter how light my steps were, I woke up Huanbi who was dozing next to me. When she saw me coming back, she was startled and quickly fell down.
Said: "Miss didn't come back so late, I thought..."
I said calmly: "You think I won't come back, do you?"
Jin Xi poured a bowl of tea for me and said softly: "I know that your Majesty will definitely come back."
There was still dew on the tip of her hair. I noticed for a moment that the toes of her shoes were also wet with dew. I looked at her and said, "Have you just gone out?"
Jinxi smiled slightly and said, "I knew that the queen would definitely come back, so I went to a place for the queen." Seeing my slight confusion, she pointed towards the back mountain.
I immediately understood, "The return of the prince is a happy event, and the concubine should be happy." I paused, "The concubine is a sensible person, so she naturally knows that she cannot let him know about this child, otherwise it will be a thunderous disaster.
It’s a big storm.”
Jin Xi whispered in a sweet voice: "What the empress is thinking about is that the concubine also thinks the same way, otherwise it will harm the prince if you can't hide it." I caressed Huanbi's tired cheek and said softly: "Don't worry, the prince will not
I will be sad for a long time. Go to sleep peacefully." Huanbi nodded, unable to suppress the deep worry and panic between her brows, and walked in with heavy steps.
I was not sleepy at all, so I took off the silver hairpin from my hair and flicked the fire wick bit by bit, as if this could brighten my own heart. "Jinxi," I whispered, "when I was a child, my father always said that I was smart and smart.
I always take advantage of my character. But no matter how smart I am, I can never understand a word of love, and I will always be trapped in a cocoon. Jin Xi, if I can, I would rather not know what love is for the rest of my life, and be a common woman for the rest of my life, or maybe even better.
Can be happy."
Jinxi shook off the foggy white dewdrops on my cloak and put on a clean dress for me, with gentle and light gestures. The moonlight fell on my long, winding hair, like stars like tears.
"A gentle daughter's family is determined to have a tough life. A lifetime of ice and snow is not worth the word of love. As a woman, who can understand the word of love, even..." She sighed, "It's just that she has given up and has no love."
It’s just a desperate separation.”
I couldn't help but lean against the window, "I used to watch the drama of "The Peony Pavilion", where Du Liniang came back from the dead for Liu Ruomei, as if love could kill a god or kill a Buddha. Now I realize that the drama is just a drama after all."
"That's why my slave said that the situation is urgent and we should only look at the present. But now, we have to look forward and backward and take every step forward. The timing is different, so we have to act differently."
I was silent. When I was a child, I read "The Peony Pavilion" and saw this sentence: "You don't know where love comes from, but it goes deep. The living can die, and the dead can live." When I was young, I always saw affection as distinct, and love is love.
, if you don’t love, you don’t love. The boundary is as clear as life and death. I always think that as long as you love, you can overcome life and death and defeat everything in this world.
But it turns out that when love goes deep, there are still many things that our meager strength cannot resist.
I raised the tea cup and said with a painful smile: "It is often said that getting drunk will solve a thousand worries, but I can't even think about getting drunk." After that, I just looked up and swallowed the tea in a big gulp. The warm tea entered my throat for a moment.
, so bitter and so astringent, as if the endless poisonous sadness was pressing into my heart, tears welled up in my eyes, and she said to Jinxi: "I have been here in this life, even if I am honored again, I will only be a sad person for the rest of my life.