She leaned against one side of my body and said softly to me: "Smile, kissing feels so good. I like it."
I kissed her cheek lovingly, "Chenchen, you are so beautiful."
At this time, I suddenly remembered something, "Chenchen, I haven't told you the reason why I like you yet."
She shook her head slightly, "I don't want to know. Unless you really want to tell me."
At this time, I hesitated a little, but I thought I should tell her, "Chenchen, I don't want to lie to you. In fact, I was attracted to you when I first saw you, not because you looked alike.
I was once familiar with someone because of the look in your eyes."
Immediately, I told her all about my first love feeling in middle school.
She immediately laughed after hearing this, "Really?"
I found that she didn't mean to be angry at all, and I breathed a long sigh of relief. But I didn't know what the outcome of what I was going to tell her next would be.
I said, "Yes. What I said is true. But when I grow up, I can never feel that way again."
She asked me softly: "So, where is she now? She is your first love."
I sighed softly, "Chenchen, she is Zhao Menglei. She is no longer in this world."
She was silent for a moment.
I continued: "I never imagined that we would meet again after so many years, and she was already married at that time. She later murdered her husband and married me without me knowing anything about it.
But after I got married, I suddenly discovered that she didn’t seem to be the person I once loved for the first time. In other words, I have been living in my first love in my heart, but I had to face the reality between me and her. Because
She was infertile, and the murder put great pressure on her, so her character became more and more weird, but I told myself that I liked her because she was my first love. Later, she
She committed suicide in the detention center. How regretful I was at that time. I still regret it to this day because I was not able to treat her better when she was alive."
Speaking of this, I choked up because Zhao Menglei's appearance had already appeared in my heart, as well as the fragments of her and me together. At this moment, the longing that had been deposited deep in my heart for a long time made me feel guilty.
The child came out and I couldn't control it anymore.
I continued, choking, and said: "Chenchen, I'm sorry. I know you will be very unhappy and even uncomfortable after hearing this. Maybe you will think that I regard you as Zhao Menglei's substitute. But, I want to tell you
You, you are not her substitute, you are the shadow of my first love. Zhao Menglei when I first fell in love is completely different from the person she was after I got married."
She said softly: "No, you are wrong. Your first love is her, and you married her because she is Zhao Menglei, because she is your first love. That's why you don't consider the fact that she is divorced, and then
You married her without hesitation, and you didn't regret it even when you found out later that she was sterile."
I was startled for a moment, shook my head and said: "No, I do care. It's just that I didn't tell her. Including the fact that she was married and couldn't have children. I am a man, how could I not care about her flaws at all?
Woolen cloth?"
She said: "But you didn't show it in front of her, did you?"
I nodded, "She is an unfortunate woman, and I can't bear to hurt her."
She asked me: "If she did not murder her husband, but stayed with you after an amicable divorce from her husband, and she was never able to have children, would you stay with her for the rest of her life?"
I was startled again, "Yes. But..."
She held my arm tightly and held me tightly, "Laugh. That's it. In fact, you really love her in your heart, because she is your first love, right?"
I said: "Maybe."
She raised her head and looked at me, "Smile, I won't be angry. You said that my eyes look like Zhao Menglei. I know that is just your feeling, and your real feeling is that I am part of your feeling when you first fell in love. You
Say yes?"
I immediately hugged her tightly. I knew in my heart that what she just said may not necessarily be her true words, but she completely accepted me, including the possibility that I regarded her as a partial substitute for Zhao Menglei.
At this time, I actually knew in my heart: Deep in my heart, she is really a part of Zhao Menglei. Because her eyes can always remind me of my first love, and can make me miss the sweet first love.
Every sweet moment.
However, Chenchen didn't care about it, which made me feel even more grateful to her. I said to myself: Feng Xiao, from now on in this life, you must be unconditionally good to her, take care of her forever, and love her.
Her, only in this way can you repay her sincerity to you.
But I was scared in my heart, "Chenchen, are you really not angry?"
She said: "Why should I be angry? If you don't tell me this, then I should be angry. I am not a little girl anymore. I know that the most important thing is that I can be with you for the rest of my life, because that requires
What is most important is that you truly love me. Some people say that love does not need a reason. I never agree with this statement, because I think you must have your own reasons to love someone. For example, if I like you, it is because later I
I found that you are different from other people, and I found that you really like me. Of course, I also made mistakes in this matter, because after you told me everything, I couldn't forgive you. Later I found out
I was wrong, because I felt that I already liked you, but I couldn't accept your past. Later I figured it out, it would be very strange for a person like you not to have a past.
This is not normal. You can tell me everything about your past, which shows that you really care about me, and it also shows that you have realized all your past mistakes. Laugh, you think so?"
I hugged her tightly, "Chenchen, you are so good to me, how can I repay you in the future?"
She said softly: "I don't need you to repay me, I need you to love me well."
I hugged her tighter, "I know, I will always love you. Chenchen, believe me."
She struggled in my arms, "laugh, you hurt me..."
Only then did I realize that I had held her too tightly while forgetting my feelings. I quickly let go of my hand and said to her apologetically: "Chenchen, I'm sorry."
But she took the initiative to hold my arm again, "Smile, let's go back." (To be continued)