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[085] Depression

Dazhi and the others talked and laughed for a few minutes and then went out. I got up, sat there, stared blankly for a while, smoked a cigarette, thinking about the knife just now, and felt a little scared, then I dusted myself off and took off my coat. I washed my face with cold water several times and calmed down. I felt that I was useless and felt aggrieved, so I didn’t go to class. I walked outside the school, took a taxi, and arrived at our only place. small pub,

After entering, I bought 5 bottles of beer from the bar and went to a corner. Feeling aggrieved, I started drinking. After 3 bottles, I couldn't control my discomfort for some reason. I haven't felt this aggrieved for a long time. It was quite embarrassing, and then tears flowed down. I listened to the sad songs in the bar, drank 5 bottles, looked at a big TV screen, and for some reason, I lay down on the table and fell asleep.

After a while, someone patted me and woke me up. I looked up and saw Chen Ran. I thought I was dreaming, so I shook my head hard and pinched myself to confirm it was true. I looked at her and asked: "How did you come."

Chen Ran said: "I come here every week. When I came in just now, the person at the bar told me that a friend of mine was there, but he didn't know what he was doing. I didn't see you until I came over. I should have asked you, how are you doing?" coming."

I said, "What time is it now?"

Chen Ran said: "It's past 6 o'clock in the evening."

I picked up my PHS phone and saw more than 10 missed calls from Brother Xu and Brother Fei. I picked up the phone and called Brother Xu. The call was answered quickly. Brother Xu asked: "Liu'er, what are you doing?" Where are you? I heard from Brother Hao that you disappeared suddenly and no one told anyone. Brother Hao and the others were helping you with the class. Why are you so old and still not making people worry?"

I endured it and said, "It's nothing. I'll go back to work in a while. Brother Xu, help me tell Brother Fei that it's okay. I drank too much just now and fell asleep. Damn it, I slept for so long."

Brother Xu said: "Well, it's fine. Brother Hao also said that something happened in your class. It seems that someone was stabbed. Your class teacher and the school are also dealing with this matter."

When I heard this, I said, "Brother Hao, are you okay?"

Brother Xu said: "Brother Hao, what's the matter? He's fine. He's still alive and kicking. He also said that the ones who were beaten were those who were beaten along with Xu Liang, who was expelled from your class. He's fine. You're fine, right?" "

I gritted my teeth and said, "It's okay. It's nothing. I won't tell you anymore. I have a girl here, so I won't talk anymore. I'll just keep having sex. After I finished speaking, I hung up the phone."

Chen Ran said: "Who was beaten?"

I said: "He's from our class."

Chen Ran said: "What about you?"

I asked: "What's wrong with me?"

Chen Ran said: "My body is very dirty. Although the light is not good, I can see it, and it is also on your arm. When I lifted you up just now, you cried out that it hurts. Do you still need to pretend?"

I said: "Aren't you happy that I was beaten? Don't you hate me?"

Chen Ran thought for a while: "I hate you, should I? To be honest, when I reported you, I made a lot of determination, but I still did it, but I found that I reported you, and I didn't I got the excitement and joy I should have, but also some conscience condemnation, am I too kind?"

I laughed: "Well, you are so kind. The most evil one is me. There is no one more evil or worse than me."

Chen Ran touched my face: "You're still crying. What happened? You're like this. You're still crying after being beaten. Who did it? You're pretty powerful, aren't you?"

I was happy: "I'm a sentimental person. It's fine. I'll recover in two days and it'll be fine. I can bear it. I was often bullied before, but then I didn't." How come I have been bullied before? At least, I have never been so embarrassed. This time I was bullied seriously. I scared myself a little. I was a little unresponsive and uncomfortable. It was a little embarrassing. It will be fine. Any bully is like this. It started from being bullied.”

Chen Ran said: "You are still thinking about revenge."

I said: "If I want to think about revenge, when I called Hui Xu just now, I just said that I was beaten, and I would naturally retaliate. The problem is, I'm not afraid of your jokes, I'm afraid of the machete, and I haven't yet Liang Liang, that courage, what can I do, it’s just embarrassing, it’s okay, you can just laugh at me.”

Chen Ran said: "You should cheer up. Since you don't want to retaliate, just adjust well and don't let everyone know. You have the same idea. If not, you wouldn't come here to drink by yourself. With your personality, you must have gone to gather people early, right?"

I looked at Chen Ran and said, "You seem to have matured a lot suddenly."

Chen Ran ignored my remark: "You seem to be 2 years younger than me. Haha, I don't know if it's a good or bad thing to go to school so early. It's said that girls are much more mature mentally than boys. "

I got up and stretched: "Are you going home? I'll take you back."

Chen Ran said: "You are here, wait for me." He got up and went to the bar to say something to someone. When he came back, he came over with a bottle of red potion and a towel. The towel was wet. She picked it up very carefully and gently wiped it on my body for a long time. I didn't move. I looked at Chen Ran without saying a word.

Then Chen Ran said to me: "Put your arms open, gently, or take off your shirt and expose your arms. There are not many people here, and I know them all."

I didn't say anything, so I took off my coat and everything else. Then the people in the bar looked here, then turned away, and ignored me. Chen Ran took the red potion and wiped it on my body bit by bit. , after wiping it, he asked me: "Does it hurt? This person is so cruel. You can take this potion back to the dormitory. If you don't want others to know, just wipe it secretly. You will always find a way." After finishing speaking, I took the towel and went back to the bar.

I put on my clothes and Chen Ran came back: "I'm going home."

I said: "I'll send it to you."

Chen Ran said: "You don't need to thank me. I caused you to spend 15 days in a detention center. I'm repaying you for this, but just remember what you owe me." After saying that, he walked forward and opened the door. out,

I thought about it and followed her. When I got to the door, I saw Chen Ran stopping the taxi, so I followed her and got in the car. She didn't say anything, so I sent her downstairs to their house. When she entered the corridor, I pulled her He stopped her hand and said, "Wait a minute."

Chen Ran looked at me: "What's wrong?"

I said: "No matter what, thank you today."

Chen Ran said: "Didn't I say so? There's no need to thank me."

I hesitated for a while: "I'm sorry."

Chen Ran was silent. After a while, he breathed a sigh of relief: "These words are the most sincere among all the words you have said to me. However, I cannot forgive you. I can't forget my hurt. I don't know how I can stop myself from hating you. The impact you have had on me is far more than that. Okay, be strong and go back to school." After that, he went upstairs. ,

I stayed where I was, looking at her back, feeling full of guilt and regret.

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