Three thousand worlds, born for love (4) No more waiting
Chapter 251: Three Thousand Worlds, Born for Love (4) No more waiting
Bai Yan rarely calls himself by his full name.
"Let's go to the rooftop and have a chat." Bai Yan looked solemn, and without saying anything, he walked towards the safe passage.
In the evening, there is no sunshine, the clouds are overcast, and the low pressure seems to be crushing the city. The wind is cool and cool, coming towards you, like a yellowed memory. The heat has faded away, leaving only white frost.
Nan Si stood behind Bai Yan with a worried look in his eyes, "Bai Yan, are you okay?"
"Nan Si, I won't wait for you anymore."
After a long silence, Bai Yan spoke in a low voice. Every word he squeezed out was like a knife cutting a wound in his heart, and every cell in his body was in pain.
Nan Si's body froze, and his dark eyes stared at the side of his face, flashing with disbelief.
Did something happen?
Why are you saying this all of a sudden?
Bai Yan tried his best to suppress his emotions and prevent himself from collapse. He kept looking at the tiny plants downstairs with his lowered eyes.
In this universe, humans are not like plants under tall buildings, they are tiny and vulnerable.
It cannot compete with the secular world, it cannot compete with time, and it cannot compete with... one's own conscience.
He really couldn't keep going like this, couldn't watch Rongrong and Nan Si quarrel again and again, and watch a woman with a big belly working hard to support her marriage.
And I am like a thief, always spying on other people's husbands and stealing other people's happiness.
This feeling is really terrible.
"I can't wait any longer." Bai Yan pursed his lips, his voice sounding calm, "I can't wait any longer for an hour, a day, a minute, or a second! Nan Si, I won't wait for you anymore, I'm leaving with someone else!"
Nan Si felt like a blow to the head. He was dizzy for a long time. His stiff body was still upright, his lips moved, and his voice was very low, "Bai Ziyan, don't you want me anymore?"
The sharp knife was inserted naked into Bai Yan's chest. How could he not want Nan Si? How could he be willing to not want Nan Si...
I don’t dare to ask for it, I just can’t afford it!
"You really can't wait until I'm forty?" He said quietly again, looking at him with an indescribable dark look.
"Yeah." His Adam's apple rolled, and he struggled to squeeze out a word.
If Rongrong didn't want Nan Si, he would be willing even if he had to wait a lifetime.
Both Rongrong and the child need Nan Si. He can no longer hold such shameful thoughts because of his own love and continue to be by Nan Si's side, always peeping at the happiness of others.
Too shameful and sinful!
Nan Si looked at his side face, which was pale and colorless, and his curled eyelashes were trembling. He was obviously reluctant to let go, so why would he say something that went against his will.
"...Bai Yan!"
"That's all I have to say, from now on we will just have an ordinary relationship as colleagues!" Bai Yan interrupted him, not wanting to know, not daring to know what he was going to say.
After the sound fell, he turned around and left.
"Bai Yan!" Nan Si's black eyes stared at his back tightly, and his hands hanging by his side were clenched into fists.
Bai Yan paused in his steps and straightened his back, but did not look back at him.
"You have to be well." No matter what the reason is for you to give up on me, I just hope that you can be well.
No matter whether you can wait until you are forty or not, what I hope most is your well-being.
Peace and security in the world, the Dharma does not disappoint the Tathagata and does not disappoint you!
Bai Yan, after all, I was the one who betrayed you first!
If you want to stay, I will hug you with both hands. If you want to leave, I can't keep you.
Bai Yan only felt something wet and hot in the corners of his eyes. He bit his lip tightly, leaving a deep blood mark with his teeth. The smell of blood in his mouth suddenly disappeared, and he just nodded fiercely.
Nan Si stared at his thin back, and a smile suddenly appeared at the corner of his mouth.
It seems like relief, like self-mockery, like...
I don't know when the cold rain fell from the sky. It drizzled, soaking my clothes. It got bigger and bigger, and finally turned into a heavy rain.
Nan Si stood alone on the rooftop, letting the wind and rain hit him. The water on his hair dripped onto his face, making him wet and cold. He couldn't tell whether it was rain or tears.
He has no right to ask Bai Yan to wait until he is forty, even if he was the one who said he wanted to wait first; there is no reason to ask Bai Yan to give him a little more time.
Because no amount of time can change their identities as men.
There is nothing worldly or moral that they can overcome.
However, I still miss this person very much and want to hug him.
Even if you don't do anything, just staying together quietly is enough.
Bai Yan didn't dare to take the elevator. He walked down from the safety belt one level at a time. The scene in front of him was blurry, and his heart was torn with a big hole - it hurt.
I can't scream or vent.
All the emotions were suppressed, except for the constant warmth and coldness in the corners of his eyes.
I don’t know how long I walked on the fifty-eighth stairs. Every step was so difficult. I walked out of the back door and walked into the storm.
My legs were shaking so much that I couldn't even stand up. I just knelt on the cold road. My heart felt like it was going to explode from my chest. I couldn't tell if the rain all over my face was tears or water...
It feels even worse than watching Nan Si get married in person.
He put his hand on his lips and bit them, biting them tightly, not daring to make a sound, but his shoulders couldn't stop shaking.
It was raining heavily, the back door was remote, there was no one around, the sound of wind and rain echoed in my ears, and his slightly concerned tone - you need to be well.
Without Qin Nansi, how could Bai Ziyan be fine?
After so many years of getting along with each other, every detail, sweating, fighting, supporting each other, is still vivid in my mind.
Perhaps, the moment Nan Si hugged him in that fiery explosion, it was already doomed.
In this life, it is impossible to fall in love with Qin Nansi with anyone else.
It would never be possible, he knew.
The greatest moment of silence in life is this.
It hurt before because Nan Si gave up on him. This time it hurt because he had to give up on Nan Si and his love for Nan Si for so many years. It was like someone cut open your chest and took away everything from your body.
A rib.
It's useless to let you tear your heart out and bleed into rivers.
The hand was bitten, and blood flowed down along the fingers, mixed with the rain, and there was a smell of blood and corrosion in the humid air.
He was immersed in tremendous grief and could not extricate himself, and did not notice the beautiful figure holding a transparent umbrella not far away.
The person under the umbrella had cold features and a trace of distress in his narrow eyes.
She ordered someone to turn off the monitor, and she also dismissed the guard on duty at the back door. She watched helplessly as he loved so painfully and suffered so much, but she couldn't do anything for him.
The only thing we can do for him is to preserve the last bit of dignity for him.
No one would ever see his embarrassment and unbearable condition at this moment.
The wind was strong and the rain was heavy, and the umbrella was swaying so much that she could hardly hold it, so she simply closed the umbrella and held it in her hand.
The black work clothes on his body were quickly soaked and clung to his body. His eyelashes wet with rain trembled slightly, but he did not turn around and leave, nor did he step forward to disturb him.
Or make him feel a little embarrassed.
A trace of dullness could not help but flow through the cold eyes, which was powerlessness, helplessness, distress, and self-mockery.
Bai Ziyan, you wait in the rain for others to look back at you, while I look at you in the rain.
Love in this world really cannot be contaminated. Once it is caught, it can cause damage to your muscles and bones, or even loss of your life. What is the difference between falling in love with someone who will never fall in love with you and being sentenced to death?
In her eyes, this exquisite man who is not like a man is smart, wise, calm, decisive, gentle, and a gentleman. He has a charm that no woman can refuse.
It's a pity that his love is so stingy that he refuses to give it to any woman.
She didn't know when she knew his feelings for Nan Si. She didn't deliberately explore him, but when his eyes stayed on Nan Si and her own eyes stayed on him, she knew in her heart...
I am already sentenced to death!
Is it ridiculous to lose to a man? He didn't even have a chance to declare war, because Bai Yan's heart, Bai Yan's eyes, and every part of Bai Yan's body cared about Nan Si so much.
She lost to Bai Yan, and she lost completely.
Bai Yan, you taught me all the rules of survival in this political circle. You taught me loyalty and respect for you, but you didn't teach me how to get rid of the poison of love.
You are an unqualified master because you yourself cannot get rid of the poison of love.
Three thousand worlds, born for love.
Bai Ziyan, you are a man born for love.
But, your love does not belong to me.
It's really cold under this heavy rain, so cold!
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When Long Pei came back, Gu Mingxi was resting on a wicker chair. She didn't sleep much last night. She was very tired after seeing Lin Mo off and dealing with Jin'er today. She slept all afternoon.
He didn't wake her up, he picked her up directly, sat down and put her on his lap.
Gu Mingxi opened his eyes drowsily, sleepily, "You're back."
"Well." He kissed the corner of her lips, "Don't sleep, otherwise you won't be able to sleep at night."
Gu Mingxi leaned against him, her body was limp and she had no strength.
"No, I can sleep." She wanted to sleep for a while longer.
So sleepy! Long Pei frowned. If he hadn't known that she couldn't give birth, he would have doubted whether she was pregnant.
Gu Mingxi seemed to see something in his eyes, "No way! Even if there was, it wouldn't be so fast!" They did it last night, how could it happen today, not to mention that she couldn't be pregnant again.
Long Pei pinched her cheek with his fingers, and there was a trace of regret in his eyes.
Without Yan'er, he and Mingxi would not be able to have children in the future, which is a pity after all.
◇◇◇This chapter has 3001 words◇◇◇
Don’t worry that there will be too many scenes between Bai Yan and Ban Xia. Here I will simply explain Ban Xia’s feelings, and there won’t be too much writing later. Since I don’t plan to write a side story about Bai Yan and Nan Si, I plan to cover their story in Volume 4.
At the end of the story, please don’t dislike the two of them. I tried to intersperse the writing as much as possible to prevent them from stealing the scenes of Ah Pei and Ming Xi.