Miao Jian later recalled this memory. On that day, her whole body felt like an abandoned trash can that had been kicked.
To all of them,
It doesn't matter.
But for her,
It was the dull pain that slowly penetrated the heart, the numbness that gradually awakened, and the isolation and helplessness that fell into the abyss.
No one said a word for her, no one defended her.
Everyone thought she deserved it, including herself.
She is a sinner and she deserves to suffer.
She has always thought so.
But Shaoyao's extremely brilliant smile, her triumphant smile, was like a sharp glass shard, gouging out her heart.
Dripping with blood.
She suddenly woke up from the pain, and there was a question in her mind.
Just because of a vase, will everyone target her?
She really tried her best to make up for it. She gave all the money she saved to her father, but he didn't want it. Was it too little for him?
Miao Jian didn't know, she just felt uncomfortable, more uncomfortable than anything else.
Later, Miao Jian fell ill and took a period of leave. How did her classmates talk about her? She didn't know, and she didn't want to know.
Later, Miao Jian changed schools. She practiced taekwondo and a little judo. She learned to protect herself and to be selfish.
She always remembered Shaoyao's smile, which was rooted in her mind, but occasionally she would forget it.
For example, when Shaoyao was in despair, or when their relationship was not so tense.
But not now, that smile appeared again.
She was like a devil, with her fanged mouth open and a ferocious smile. She said:
"What are you afraid of? Why do you have to be soft-hearted? Why don't you fight back?"
"You see she has treated you like this, do you still endure it? Do you still expect to retaliate with kindness? Stop dreaming, she is just a white-eyed wolf, you have to fight back."
"Do you think about the nice looks she's given me over the years? No, she always has a cold face every time I see her. Today it's even more outrageous. She even told you to get out."
…
Miao Jian's head was about to explode. These noisy sounds were noisy to her. She covered her ears, but these sounds were still in her mind, just like the song echoing in the conch, endless and continuous.
But this is not singing, this is the inner demon that threatens life.
-
Shao Xinghan was sitting in the living room, with his head lowered and his hands on his legs, looking depressed and silent.
He sat there for a long time, until early in the morning. There was no sound in Miao Jian's bedroom, not even a hint of popularity.
Everything was eerily quiet.
Shao Xinghan fell asleep on the sofa without taking off his clothes, shoes, or blanket.
When Miao Jian woke up the next day, it was still dark. When she opened her eyes, she was surrounded by darkness. She looked at the dark night as if in a dream. Her heart sank into the deep black cliff, and there was nowhere around her.
Keyi. As the day dawned, Miao Jian's heart sank even deeper. She stayed up like this until dawn, and Miao Jian's heart had sunk to the bottom. No one could come to help her.
Miao Jian got up and got out of bed. She didn't turn on the light, so she went to the bathroom in the dark. According to her thinking, Shao Xinghan had already left here, and she was the only one here.
She felt along the way and walked based on her feelings. After all, she couldn't see it, so bumps and bumps were inevitable.
Miao Jian groped her way out of the bedroom. She stood by the door and leaned against the door to catch her breath. Her breathing was not heavy, but she just wanted to slow down. After a while, she walked forward again, and within a few steps she kicked someone.
Thing. The thing was very light, so it didn’t hurt at all, but the sound was very loud.
A "clang" sound startled Miao Jian himself.
She was stunned for a moment, then kicked the thing away with her feet and groped forward again.
As soon as I took a step outside, I heard a rustling sound, a bit like the sound of clothes rubbing against each other.
Then there was the sound of someone breathing, a little heavy, like it was a man.
Miao Jian narrowed her eyes and tilted her head to the source of the sound based on her hearing, and then there was another sound of breathing.
Miao Jian stood there, restraining her voice and feeling slightly nervous.
It was too dark to see clearly what it was, but she knew that the sound came from the sofa.
The man seemed to be more awake, and the sound of clothes rubbing against each other started again.
"Miao Miao?" A low and hoarse voice came, and Miao Jian's nervousness was relieved. In just a moment, she became nervous again, even more nervous than before.
It's Shao Xinghan.
She stood there numbly and heard Shao Xinghan stand up and turn on the light.
The originally dark room lit up in an instant. Miao Jian's eyes, which were originally open, were stimulated and narrowed. It took a while to adjust before opening them.
Miao Jian stood there in her pajamas, saying nothing.
"What's wrong with Miaomiao? Are you feeling unwell?" Shao Xinghan's voice was so hoarse that the original sound of his voice could not be heard.
Miao Jian glanced at him, lowered her eyebrows, moved her mouth, but said nothing.
Shao Xinghan walked over to touch her, but before he could touch her, Miao Jian moved away.
"I'm going to the bathroom." Her voice was small. She didn't even look at Shao Xinghan's eyes. She only looked at his chin, which was already unshaven.
It looks a bit vicissitudes of life.
Shao Xinghan put down his hand and stepped away, "Well, let's go."
Miao Jian entered the bathroom, closed the door, and turned on the water from the faucet. The sound of gurgling water could be heard.
She leaned against the bathroom door, her head raised, her eyebrows stretched, and she could not see any emotion.
The next second, a ferocious and painful expression appeared on her face, her brows furrowed tightly, and she covered her face with her hands.
The sound of rushing water covered up her low sobs. Her body twitched and she slid down little by little against the door.
…
Miao Jian washed her face with warm water. Her eyes were still a little red. She wiped some lotion on her face, patted her face, and opened the bathroom door.
Shao Xinghan was sitting on the sofa, his expression was not very good, his head was hanging down, and he looked like he was about to fall asleep.
He woke up when Miao Jian opened the door, raised his head and looked at Miao Jian.
Miao Jian came over slowly. Shao Xinghan stood up as he watched her come over.
Do you want to let him go? But how do you say it?
Miao Jian looked at him, her words stuck in her mouth and she could not come out.
Shao Xinghan spoke first: "Are you feeling better? Go back to your room and rest quickly. Don't catch a cold."
His voice was so hoarse that Miao Jian thought of a puppy she had seen on the roadside before. The puppy kept crying for help, and its throat could no longer make a sound, but
Still roaring.
It was like a dead air duct, making a horrifying sound.
All Miao Jian's previous thoughts were shattered, and her eyes that finally recovered were filled with tears again. She pursed her lips and looked at Shao Xinghan through the hazy mist, her heart ached and shattered into pieces.
How gentle he is, no matter what happens, he will always be there for her, even if she is wrong, he will stand firmly behind her. But she is still thinking of driving him away at this time, why is she so cruel?