I have been separated from Yuanyuan for more than a year, but after the separation, I feel like I have become completely different, my brain is confused, mentally abolished, irritable, and sentimental. But sometimes I am a little bit more likely to be a little bit more likely.
, I feel very clear-headed, sober and able to write poetry, sober like a department store shelves that have just been sorted out. There are tobacco and alcohol on this side; there are food on the other side; there are also
It's daily necessities... But, sometimes, my mind is really messy, as messy as a ball of numbness. When I sort out this ball of numbness, I feel like a big head, a headache like a needle, and pain
I have to want to cry very much. But in this timid big city, I don’t want to shed tears, and I dare not make a cry. This is my cowardice. How can a cowardly person have the right to be sad and cry
Woolen cloth?…….
"Hey! Living is really meaningless. It's better to die..."
"Thinking up is nothing big. Don't you just encounter adversity in life now? Although adversity sometimes destroys a person, sometimes adversity can also create a person. Adversity can be the executioner of the weak, but it
It is also the steelmaking furnace for the strong and the starting point for the strong. You must stand up bravely and be a strong man. Besides, people must always look forward, and it is impossible to live in the memories of the past.
….”
Today, the gangster treats him, and he bought wine and some cooked dishes. The gangster said something to me at the wine table. These words seemed to have a profound truth, and I couldn't believe my ears, like
Such a careless person, he could actually say such philosophical words.
I looked at the hooligan foolishly, I wanted to laugh, I wanted to laugh happily. However, there were some words that I had to admit. "Stand up bravely and be a strong man, and don't just live in the memories of the past."
I think, I will, I will become strong and will come out of the shadow of the past...
"I think……."
"What do you want to do?" asked the hooligan, chewing the chicken legs and taking a sip of wine.
"I want to go out for a while and go out for a relaxing time."
I murmured.
"Okay, you've still had some savings in the past year. It's okay to go out and have a walk." Then the gangster said again. "But don't forget to come back early, and you have to continue looking for a job to make a living..."
"Don't worry, hooligan." I took a sip of wine and said. "You are really my good brother. Now you are the only one who cares about me." I said gratefully.
"Is this a big deal? But, remember to eat at Anshi and take good care of yourself when you are outside." The gangster said again.
"Don't worry. Look at you, you're so verbally like an old mom." I said quietly.
"If there is an old mom by your side, I will be lazy to care about you." said the hooligan.
....
I backpacked myself, traveled alone, and witnessed the scenery along the way. I visited the vast tropical rainforest of Xishuangbanna and saw rare animals and plants in the mountains and rivers. In this legendary place, a unique folk custom,
It is enough to make me intoxicate, and it seems to make me forget my worries.
These days, I have been catching up with the Water Splashing Festival here again. It is such a happy game! When the event is splashing water, there are water everywhere in the sky, and everyone is splashing water. My eyes are filled with water and I can't see anything at all.
Not to mention that you can see clearly which person is pouring it, or who will pour water on me.
Haha, there is also a battle between men and women. It’s so intense, almost all of them are splashing, shouting, and laughing. At this moment, I really hope to share the unrestrained happiness outside with her...
The outside world is so big, but sometimes I feel it is not romantic. The flowers and plants I see are no different from everything in my hometown, and they are meaningless at all. In the outside world, I took many photos.
But after taking a photo, I never looked through it again, maybe I could only put it in a certain corner forever...
I have seen the most beautiful scenery in the world, but my heart is still pale. These freedoms and tranquility in travel cannot soothe a person's inner anxiety; during travel, I have gone to many corners of the world and eaten many of the best in the world.
Food. But the mood is not better; during travel, I have been to nightclubs, to be in the beauty home, and have vented my desires and satisfaction. However, all of this is not only for myself to feel myself
The ugliness and dirtyness of the inner world still cannot fill a person's inner emptiness...
In the outside world, it is actually very annoying and boring. Few people talk to me. However, I thought, maybe traveling can make me truly know myself. In a strange environment, I can better learn how to get along with myself.
Only in the future can we get along with others better...
Traveling is not comfortable, but it allows me to find myself in confusion and loneliness. The strange environment makes me busy. I can't tell whether it is South Street or North Street in a certain city, and I can't tell whether it is South Street or North Street in a certain university.
This is the South Gate or the North Gate. I suddenly realized how small I was, so why did I rush to find the South Gate or the North Gate? Didn’t it mean that living is no longer interesting...?
No, this is a feeling of existence. Your feet are really stepping on the ground, and the picture in front of you is real. Is this world big or small? Looking around, I am standing there
In the crowd, standing on the street, in a corner of the earth, I am a living being. Although I am small, I am an entity, which can prove that I am still alive...
"People are tired and heartbroken; they have loved, hurt, and lost, and finally let go; love scares me, and I completely give up on love..."
These are the tragic sentences I wrote in my diary on a quiet night, one by one.
This is also a man pretending to be strong every day to pretend to be a hollow body, often showing a smile in a hypocritical way, but tears are flowing in his heart.
Maybe you will ask me, why do you do this?
Because, I am a man, not a woman.
Maybe at this time, you will ask me some little secrets about men and women:
"Does men have too much sentimentality and helplessness?
No.
Why?
Because men are funny.
Men hide their sentimentality and helplessness without missing out.
Therefore, you cannot see the sadness and helplessness of men at will.
So, what about women?
have.
Because women like to pour out every bit of unhappiness in their hearts…”
It is said that men are funny, and they will not tell their privacy and their thoughts frankly.
But I think some stories don't have to be told to everyone; some sadness doesn't necessarily mean everyone will understand them. But you can still know the story of this man.
Among the same sex, I am an exception. I am not a person who hides privacy and everything. I will spread my diary without any concealment, open up the curtains and scenes in my heart, and pour out the words in my heart. My privacy, I
The sorrow, joy, sorrow, and joy.
My love flowers bloom early and wither very early.
In this life, I have loved a few girls unforgettably, but they...
After I experienced the vicissitudes of love, I saw through the world wandering around the world.
Just as the wound healed, disaster fell from the sky again, and the hidden arrows were fired at once, and I fell down with heavy injuries...
Who can make it clear that I can still stand up?
Where have all the women I have known, those who have been bored, those who have loved and lost?
Really, I have been thinking about, thinking about, remembering, caring about you...
No matter where you go, no matter whether you can see you again, I still have to wait for you, even if it has been waiting for you for thousands of years.
This is like my diary left in the quiet night of Guqing:
I don't care,
Will the dream come true?
I don't care,
You have hurt my heart again and again
I still insist on it,
Like no soul,
The one who is waiting for you;
Persist,
This love will not have any results,
That's true.
Time is always gradually eroding my heart.
The love that is buried in my heart is getting deeper and deeper,