Xu Jia curled his lips humorously and said to Bai Qi: "To put it bluntly, I just want to find an excuse to release you from the animal world. This excuse is that you are sick. Nowadays, some powerful people do this. It is considered a cure for them."
A green channel.”
Bai Qi was shocked: "Is there such a thing? It's unimaginable in our Daqin."
Xu Jia spread his hands and said: "So the Qin Dynasty has died. When the water is clear, there will be no fish. This principle is very simple. However, you know how to kill people and set fires, but you don't understand this principle. Everyone, Han, do you understand what I mean?"
Han Yu laughed loudly: "I understand, I understand, the rule of man is greater than the rule of law."
Xu Jia nodded: "Well said, brother Zhong Kui, please change the names of Han Yu and Bai Qi in the book of life and death, so as to avoid long nights and dreams."
"That's right, I'll cross it out right now."
The life and death book not only records life and death, but also records crimes.
Crossing out Han Yu's name from the hungry ghost realm and crossing out Bai Qi's name from the animal realm means that they are completely out of despair.
It means their guilt disappears.
Zhong Kui is the judge and has this right.
However, he would never dare to do this without a legitimate reason.
Just like a financial manager, he controls all the company's funds, but he never dares to spend a penny.
Han Yu and Bai Qi watched eagerly as their names were crossed out by Zhong Kui. They happily jumped three feet high and hugged each other, their eyes filled with excitement.
Having been trapped for thousands of years, and being able to figure it out with just one move, it's indescribably sad.
Han Yu and Bai Qi toasted Xu Jia and Zhong Kui in succession to express their gratitude for their great kindness.
"Come on, don't go home until you're drunk today. You haven't drank in years. Drink more. I have plenty of wine. Don't save it for me, or I'll be in trouble with him."
Xu Jia picked up the wine glass and said to Han Yu and Bai Qi: "You don't need to thank me. I'm just a little help. Brother Zhong Kui is your great benefactor. With a stroke of his pen, your crimes will be gone. Why don't you thank me properly?"
Hit him?"
"That's right, it's time to thank Lord Zhong Kui."
"Lord Zhong Kui, I respect you."
…
Han Yu and Bai Qi took turns toasting to Zhong Kui.
Zhong Kui drank a lot just now, and now he is a little confused. Fortunately, he is still rational and will not be embarrassed.
Seeing Han Yu and Bai Qi toasting to him, he said awkwardly: "I'm already drunk, so... I'd better skip it."
"How can we avoid it?"
Xu Jia suddenly became anxious, slammed the table, and said with a straight face: "Brother Zhong Kui, is it because you are so powerful that you don't look down on the Han family and Bai Qi? You are a bit aloof like this, how can you unite everyone?
?”
"this……"
Being defeated by Xu Jia, Zhong Kui had no choice but to pick up his wine glass and start drinking with Han Yu.
This drink could no longer stop the floodgates, and dozens of jars of Maotai were poured down.
Bai Qi and Han Yu were drunk and dreaming of death, and fell into a deep sleep.
Zhong Kui reluctantly sat down, but he was also covered in fog and his mind was confused.
Only Xu Jia was sober and didn't drink much at all.
When Zhong Kui was drunk, he started to talk too much, like a surging river.
Xu Jia and Zhong Kui were drinking and gradually got to the main topic.
"Brother Zhong Kui, you said that the top ten iron hat kings in hell are fighting with each other because of a seductive woman? I don't believe it. Which woman can make the top ten iron hat kings jealous of each other?"
Zhong Kui still had some sense: "Don't say it, don't say it."
Depend on!
Still pretending to be with me.
Xu Jia asked Zhong Kui: "Are you also interested in that charming woman?"
Zhong Kui glared and blurted out: "Brother Xu, do I dare to touch the woman you have slept with?"
ah?
Xu Jia's mind exploded: "What do you mean? I have slept with this woman? Zhong Kui, please explain clearly. Who is this woman? I actually slept with her?"
After Zhong Kui said such words casually, he felt bad. He immediately woke up, slapped himself hard in the mouth, and said angrily: "Talk too much, I asked you to talk too much, now I have leaked my guts."
Xu Jia stared at Zhong Kui and asked without any doubt: "Brother Zhong Kui, if you still regard me as your friend, you should speak frankly to me and not hide it from me without conscience."
Zhong Kui sighed: "It's not that I'm hiding it from you out of conscience, but it's for your own good."
Xu Jia said: "Don't talk nonsense, just tell me, I have slept with this woman, have I really slept with her? I have never slept with a woman in hell."
He has only a handful of women, and none of them are from hell.
Zhong Kui sighed and pointed to the sky: "This charming woman came down from the sky."
Came down from heaven?
When I was in heaven, I slept with a woman, Chang'e.
Xu Jia stood up suddenly, clenched his fists tightly, and his eyes were red: "You mean Chang'e? This charming woman in hell is actually Chang'e?"
Zhong Kui nodded: "Yes, it's Chang'e."
Xu Jia was as dumb as a wooden chicken.
Chang'e went to hell? Did she make the top ten kings of hell jealous?
Doesn’t Chang’e guard Guanghan Palace?
Why did you end up in hell?
He used to be good friends with Chang'e, but after getting drunk, Chang'e slept with him, so he escaped from the heavenly palace into the mortal world and became a mortal.
He had an unforgivable anger towards Chang'e.
Chang'e couldn't repay this anger with her body.
Grandma, I have practiced cultivation for three thousand years, and after sleeping with you for one night, I became a mortal.
Isn’t this prostitution expensive enough?
Xu Jia scratched his head for a moment, grabbed Zhong Kui's collar, and asked him: "Tell me, Chang'e was fine in the Heavenly Palace, how come she went to hell?"
"Why are you so blushing and thick-necked? You ask me why Chang'e went to hell, how do I know? Can I control hell, can I also control heaven?"
Zhong Kui's clothes were torn by Xu Jia, so he quickly pushed him away to prevent this kid from taking advantage of him.
Xu Jia forced himself to calm down: "Okay, don't tell me, right? Zhong Kui, you take me to hell, and I will ask Chang'e myself."
In fact, what he wanted to ask Chang'e more was: Why do you want to sleep with me? Is it fun to cheat your friends?
Zhong Kui shook his head: "As expected, I guessed it right. The reason why I didn't tell you the truth is because I was afraid that you would get emotional and shout that you were going to hell."
Xu Jia hummed: "What's wrong with going to hell?"
Zhong Kui said: "You are a mortal now and your cultivation is not enough. Once you go to hell, your cultivation will be hindered and it will have a great impact on you. You don't know that, right?"
Xu Jia knew that Zhong Kui was telling the truth and remained silent.
Zhong Kui added: "Furthermore, once you go to hell and meet Chang'e, once you start a quarrel, there will be no fire. By then, everyone will know that the Bone Immortal is not dead. Guess how the Jade Emperor will deal with you."
?”
Xu Jia's hot brain finally cooled down, and he kicked the tree depressedly: "It seems that I still can't go to this hell."
"You must never go. If you go, you will never come back."
Zhong Kui reminded Xu Jia earnestly: "Don't be impatient. It won't be too late to go to hell when you make some progress in your cultivation."
Xu Jia cheered up: "Yes, I will wait a little longer. Now that I am in the spiritual acuity stage, as long as I advance to another level, it will be easy to go to hell. When the time comes, I must question Chang'e, why she has to
Trick me."
Zhong Kui said with some jealousy: "Okay, it's not too bad to spend the spring night with Chang'e. After all, so many people admire Chang'e, but you are the only one who picked the peach."
"Tch, I'd rather not pick this peach."
Xu Jia drank a few sips of wine depressedly, and couldn't help but ask again: "How did Chang'e end up in hell? Don't you have any gossip?"
Zhong Kui lowered his voice: "Chang'e went to hell and didn't show up. Only the top ten iron hat kings, Ji Luo, me, and a few powerful masters knew about it, and the others knew nothing. I heard from the gossip,
Chang'e was transferred to work in hell by the Queen Mother, in charge of household registration, who knows whether it is true or not."
Xu Jia was stunned: "The Queen Mother transferred Chang'e away to hell? How can this be transferred away? Isn't this just a banishment?"
Xu Jia asked again: "What about the jade rabbit beside Chang'e? And where is Wu Gang who cut down the tree?"
Zhong Kui shook his head: "Then I don't know. Anyway, Yutu and Wu Gang are not with Chang'e."
Xu Jia frowned: "Then the matter is not that simple."
"Why did you say that?" Zhong Kui asked, squinting his eyes.
Xu Jia said: "The Jade Rabbit is Chang'e's pet and is inseparable from Chang'e. If Chang'e is normally transferred out of the Heavenly Palace and goes to work in hell, the Jade Rabbit will definitely bring it with her. Wu Gang, who is Chang'e's loyal porter, will also be brought with him. Now the Jade Rabbit
Neither Wu Gang nor Chang'e is with Chang'e, wouldn't it be strange?"
"You are right, but there is something fishy about this matter." Zhong Kui nodded frequently.
Xu Jia said: "Forget it, don't think about it so much. When my cultivation reaches a higher level, I will go to hell in person and ask Chang'e why she plotted against me. However, Zhong Kui, in the meantime, I want to ask you something."
Zhong Kui said: "But it doesn't matter."
Xu Jia sighed: "You have to take good care of Chang'e and don't let her run away because she can't get used to it..."
Zhong Kui laughed loudly: "Brother Xu, you still care about Chang'e."
"You don't care."
Xu Jia glared: "I'm afraid that if she runs away, how can I repair her in hell. You kid, don't think so wildly. Believe it or not, I'll beat you up."
"Believe it, I believe it." Zhong Kui covered his mouth and couldn't hold back his laughter.
Xu Jia held it in for a long time and stopped talking.
Zhong Kui said, "If you have anything to say, just say it. What else are you embarrassed about with me?"
Xu Jia hesitated and said: "Well... don't let Chang'e be bullied by the top ten iron hats, you know what I mean."
"Ha ha."
Zhong Kui smiled particularly obscenely: "It seems that you still like Chang'e."
Xu Jia hummed: "What do you like? This is called exclusivity. The woman I have slept with belongs to me. I can only bully her, and no one else can even lift a finger."
Zhong Kui smiled: "Brother Xu, are you too worried? Chang'e is easy to mess with? Even the top ten iron hat kings are not enough for her to play alone, otherwise how could hell be in chaos?"
When Xu Jia heard this, he suddenly laughed.
"That's right. Even the Jade Emperor can't defeat Chang'e. How can there be a few little red guys from hell who are Chang'e's opponents?"
Thinking of this, Xu Jia felt relieved. (To be continued)