"Really, you annoying mercenaries are everywhere. Tell me what information you need. I'll get off work after I give it to you."
Natasha walked over with cat steps, the expression on her face looked very impatient, but she folded her arms and tapped her other elbow rhythmically with the fingers of one hand, secretly conveying the words.
Completely different information.
It seems that there are not only sensors but also monitoring equipment on the roof. This is not the place to talk.
Su Ming nodded: "As I heard just now, we need Santa Claus's home address, and there is nothing else."
"Wait here, don't go downstairs." Natasha held down her earphones and said something, then turned and left.
"Shall we go down?" Wade leaned over to ask while putting his dislocated arm on his shoulder. His mean expression could be seen through the mask.
Before Su Ming could reply, Spider-Man grabbed his clothes: "Do you think this is a winter vacation study tour? We are pressed for time, and I don't think SHIELD welcomes troublemakers like you, just like you
It’s like being banned from most museums.”
"I feel sad just talking about this. Those damn curators deprived me of one of my pleasures. A virgin like you will never know how many hot single moms there are with their kids in the museum. Oh my God,
They are so wild, their legs can break the spine of a bison, and their fat and mature body makes them suck..."
The eyes on Deadpool's mask turned into crescent shapes, and there was a wet patch near the corners of his mouth.
"Ouch! Disgusting! Do you know that this is very irresponsible behavior?"
Spider-Man glared at him with disgust and took the initiative to distance himself from Deadpool. Even though Wade didn't have any peculiar smell on his body today, he still felt unclean.
If there really is a fallen devil, it would probably be black and red, right?
"Can you take responsibility? It's fun to be a person as long as you do whatever you want. Why are you so serious? Hehehe..."
Deadpool jumped up to Peter, winked and poked Peter's armpits with his fingers, trying to make him smile.
Unexpectedly, he was suddenly punched on the top of his head by his cousin, and he fell to the ground in the snow on the rooftop.
"Don't imitate the clown, you are not as crazy as him."
Wade rolled over and lay on the snow, his broken skull healing quickly: "But I'm better than him, right? I have 100,000 Twitter followers, but he doesn't."
Su Ming retracted his fist and looked at the scenery with his hands behind his back: "Gotham has a population of 8 million, and the clown can incite half of them. He often appears on news programs. What about you? He doesn't even have a TV commercial."
"That's a problem. I have to shoot an advertisement for my firm. Let me think about it..." Wade became serious, pinched his chin and began to think.
Peter tilted his head: "Why can't I understand what you are talking about? Who is the clown?"
"The Joker is my cousin's good friend, because darkness and madness always follow. Young man, it's like I made you." Deadpool immediately gave up thinking, jumped up from the ground, and hooked Peter's shoulder with a smile.
Strange thoughts began to be implanted in his ears: "In fact, it is easy for you to become dark. Put your spider silk launcher on your belt, and push your hips forward every time you launch. This is how to imitate a spider.
First of all, how can any spider spin silk by hand?"
"Go away, I'm not a real spider, and the action you mentioned is too obscene. Do you know that I am still a child, do you still have any humanity?" Peter got out from under Deadpool's arm, angrily.
Turn your back to Wade.
Deadpool's eyes lit up, he held his chin and looked behind Peter: "Who's not a baby? In fact, it's not bad if you put the spider silk launcher on the chrysanthemum. For a child as old as you, many people think that
Spider silk comes out of their PP."
"If something can really come out of my PP, I will definitely put it in your mouth." Peter still couldn't be serious about Deadpool, and wanted to quarrel with him for some reason. It felt very funny.
So after bickering for a while, he started quarreling with Deadpool again, and the two had a snowball fight on the roof of the building.
............................
"Is this Santa Claus? I don't believe it."
Natasha brought the target's home address, so the three said goodbye to her and quickly rushed to a place in the Arctic Circle in Greenland.
There is a wooden cabin in the pale ice and snow. Warm light shines from the windows and green smoke rises from the chimney. Everything looks ordinary and warm.
But when the three of them went outside the window to see what was going on, they saw a skinny old man wearing shorts and a vest sitting on the sofa. He held the bottle with squinted eyes and continued to pour wine into his mouth, while using a syringe to inject the wine into his mouth.
I injected something into my thigh, and my face became abnormally red.
It's the kind of unhealthy weight loss, with a big belly but thin limbs.
The floor next to the sofa was covered with empty bottles, and the flames in the fireplace not far away were licking a large pile of pill boxes and bottles, making crackling sounds in the flames.
Peter felt that all his views were shattered. The legendary Santa Claus was not only extremely decadent, an alcoholic and a drug addict, but also had a medication problem.
So he immediately suspected whether the three of them had been deceived by SHIELD, and asked Deadpool and Deathstroke.
"They didn't dare to lie to my cousin. This must be Santa Claus himself, but...did it turn out that my standards for good children have been wrong all along? If I use him as the benchmark, I am indeed not good enough.
Wade also lay on the window sill, peeping and whispering: "I asked why Negative Sonic Lace Warhead brought a big gift package to work today. It turned out that Santa Claus gave it to her. Damn it."
"Watch your words, no one can say that Santa Claus deserves to die." Peter retorted in a low voice.
"Do you think you are Captain America? Besides, look at him like this. I can find a dozen Santa Clauses like this in the sewers of New York." Deadpool whispered back.
"..." Looking at Santa Claus in the room, stuffing a lot of pills of various colors into his mouth and swallowing them with wine, Peter was speechless.
Su Ming shrank from the window sill, turned over and leaned against the wall, sitting on the snow: "Something is wrong, have you noticed?"
"I haven't seen anything right since I got here. Can you take me home? I have to think about whether to tell my aunt the real situation of Santa Claus." Peter also sat down with his head drooping.
Wade was no exception. He also sat down, but he was reminded by his cousin that he did find a blind spot.
His brain and eyes just move too fast, and he will pass over the clues accidentally, but as long as someone reminds him, he can react almost immediately, which gives him the opportunity to laugh at the little spider:
"I noticed something was wrong, but you didn't. Alas, this is really the difference between children and adults."
Peter immediately retorted: "It was obviously your cousin who discovered it, but now it's your discovery. You are probably the thickest-skinned mercenary in the world."
"Okay, let's get serious, now we are on a mission." Su Ming stepped in to separate the two people: "First of all, Santa's reindeer and sleigh are gone. Reindeer, as a kind of beast, always has a smell, and here except
The smell of wind and snow, nothing else."
Wade also raised a finger and said with some pride: "Yes, and there is not a single gift in the house. Santa's bag is left behind the sofa, but it is shriveled inside."
"So, it's true. There should have been many dwarfs helping him prepare gifts, but now it seems like he is the only one." Peter also discovered a blind spot.
Su Ming affirmed the two people's statement. He took off his face mask, flicked a cigarette and held it in his mouth: "Santa Claus just injected insulin. He should have diabetes. It is not possible to take such a large amount of medicine."
I looked at the half-burnt boxes. They should be vitamins and calcium tablets. Living in a place like the Arctic Circle, it is easy to suffer from vitamin deficiency. Coupled with the extreme day and night, it is normal for the elderly to be deficient in calcium.
.”
"Tch, I thought it was cocktail therapy. If Santa Claus has cancer, I can sell the news to the newspaper." Wade was a little disappointed. As a cancer patient, he also used to take pills one by one, constantly.
Hair loss.
Peter rubbed his hands, then turned over and leaned on the window to sneak in. He rubbed off some snowflakes and landed on Deadpool's mask, making Wade's nose itchy.
After careful observation, Peter touched his head and shrank back in embarrassment.
"So, I misunderstood him?"
Su Ming patted Peter on the shoulder and shook his head: "Not necessarily. We live in a world where what we hear is false and what we see is false. Maybe those boxes and bottles are just disguises and contain high-quality medicine."
Deadpool: "Ah..."
All Peter was thinking about was that he could feel his frown even through the mask: "But it's true that he drank too much. Did he get into some trouble?"
"It's still not certain. Those wine bottles may just be orange juice mixed with water, and the abnormal redness of his face is due to burst capillaries under the skin. This is a common disease in cold zones." Su Ming denied the little spider's theory again.
view.
Deadpool: "Ah..."
Peter nodded helplessly. He learned some knowledge from the two mercenaries. Sometimes what he saw was still not the truth.
This reminded him of his past patrols. Once he saw a man in a dark alley at night who seemed to be raping a woman, and the woman let out a piercing scream.
So Peter went down and beat the man violently, then tied him up with spider silk and planned to take him to the police station.
As a result, the woman came up and slapped him because she and her boyfriend came out in the middle of the night because they wanted to play role-playing, and Spider-Man ruined their fun.
Peter was embarrassed and helpless, so he could only leave in despair.
I just experienced it before but didn't think about it carefully. Now it seems that I need to pay more attention to observation in the future and don't jump to conclusions easily.
"I understand, thank you, Mr. Wilson." He nodded towards Su Ming and patted the snowflakes on his shoulders.
Su Ming lowered his head to light the cigarette, then raised his head, looked at the night sky with distant eyes, slowly exhaled the smoke, and showed a melancholy smile full of mature temperament: "Peter, you have to remember that everything is empty and everything is allowed, as long as
If you remember this, you will become a qualified assassin...hero."
"What was that word starting with A just now? I didn't hear it clearly." Peter tilted his head and asked again.
Deadpool: "Ah..."
Peter's head turned to Deadpool, and he pushed him angrily: "What are you going to say?"
"Sneeze!" The red and black mask on the nose instantly wet two pieces. He inhaled hard again, and the wet area seemed to become smaller. He raised his fingers to rub his nose and gave Peter a thumbs up: "Finally
I typed it out, so cool."
However, Santa Claus, who heard the noise in the house, had already picked up the double-barreled shotgun from the side of the sofa and walked toward the door.