This month’s reward speech has been postponed until today, which is really embarrassing.
How to say it.
This autumn is indeed a troubled autumn.
A person's slight words are like a duckweed floating in the ocean.
Looking back at my journey, I can see that it has never been smooth sailing. On the contrary, it has been a road full of misfortunes.
I am indeed a very simple person.
There are three goals in writing a book.
One, support the family.
Second, be loyal to your hobbies.
Third, the name will remain in history.
Indeed, I never dare to claim to be a talented person.
After all, there are not many people who have written books for fifteen years and still accomplished nothing.
In this industry, those who write about my age either have some degree of promise from a great master, or they have already recognized themselves and changed careers.
It's hard to describe in words the feeling of not being famous for fifteen years.
Life is only a few decades long, and I don’t know how many fifteen years can be wasted here.
Every night when people are quiet, I always think about whether I will regret my choices when I get older and can no longer press the keyboard or write a beautiful story.
I have always told people that I am very peaceful and do not envy or envy those famous gods.
But I rarely tell others that my so-called peace is not something I was born with. It is just kneeling in the quagmire and struggling powerlessly over and over again, and finally I slowly learned to face reality.
My reality is very simple.
I'm too weak, too bad, too rubbish.
I was using talents I didn't have to force myself into an industry that didn't match my talents.
After all, readers have sharp eyes. If I can really write a good book, why bother waiting for fifteen years?
I think I'm smart, but I'm actually stupid.
Really smart people should have chosen a more suitable path long ago.
I don’t know if I am afraid of change or if I am unwilling to do so.
The ups and downs of these days are visible to the author, and so are the readers.
In fact, I understand the demands and positions of many people, as well as the rights that everyone wants to fight for.
I thought about saying something.
But it dawned on me that I didn't deserve it.
Others worry that they will not receive more generous rewards if their books become popular.
If it were fifteen years ago, I would have had exactly the same worries and indignation. I was young and passionate at that time.
But when I look back, I see that in the fifteen years behind me, I have not been able to write a book of even coveted value.
Not one year, not two years, but fifteen years.
There are really not many fifteen years in a person's life.
Fifteen years later, I still haven’t been able to write a book worth fighting for.
So I thought again, what am I fighting for?
What does a person who has not been able to write a red book in fifteen years deserve?
Just surviving is hard enough.
The current trend of "Savior" is also the best since I started working in this industry.
I told myself that no matter how fierce the wind and waves outside were, it was not my life after all.
What I should care about, what I should always pay attention to, is that my book must be worthy of my own books and the readers who have always supported me.
So I'm trying very hard to keep my mind clear.
I don't think about anything, only a very simple thought.
Write your own book.
If I smash my writing, how will the external environment develop in the future? What can I expect?
Who will help me support my family?
Help me pay off my debt?
Am I worthy of myself and the current readers of this book?
In addition, I don’t know what everyone thinks of the quality of the recent chapters of "Savior".
From my personal point of view, I am dissatisfied. I have never been satisfied with myself.
Of course, the writing of this book will inevitably become more and more difficult, and the difficulty of creation is increasing exponentially.
It must be logical, the scene must be constantly enlarged, it must start with details, the characters must be vivid, and the plot must be interesting and fascinating. The so-called truths I talk about must be interesting and understandable to readers.
Thoughts.
The creative core of this book is actually very sad.
This is the biggest difficulty I face now.
I must and can only concentrate on this matter with all my strength.
Otherwise, I can't apologize to anyone.
As I reach middle age, my edges have smoothed off, but I still remember my original intention of writing stories.
I'm still arrogant.
I still want to be a writer who can write works that can be remembered by people, instead of always being called a code writer.
A hundred years later, there are still people who read my books and get excited, moved to tears, and laugh because of my books.
I'm still greedy.
I also want to be rich, as rich as JK Rowling.
At the same time, I always firmly believe that a writer's wealth and his talent can be equal.
I can't guarantee that this book will do it.
Thank you to all readers who subscribed, tipped, and voted for me during April 2020.
Below is the reward list for April, with the amounts in brackets.
Thank you everyone, you are so strong!
cynical egg, ios (2450)
Second-hand sportsman(1100)
Deep Sea 2(1000)
The world-destroying frog (375)
Ying Shi Zha Le (218)
Qingfengv (200)
20170825 Ai Yu(120)
☆Night Breeze☆(100)
ps madman(100)
spicy (100)
Book Friends 20180429025055152 (100)
Wood Core(100)
Ye Yanan(100)
Mr. Sheng (100)
Ryuji's heart is broken (100)
My name is Bai Qi, the God of Death (100)
grab your lollipop, ios (100)
Cangliu 133 (100)
Zheng Xunyi(100)
Reader 1565399552192387 (100)
Silent Desert Yimi(100)
Horse racing through Xiguan (100)
Drowning has no results (100)
Dudududai (100)
Dianjun, ios (100)
Susususu(97)
Suspect Cheng (70)
Domineering and crazy, Long Aotian, ios (60)
Super Ghost Wu Sheng (51)
Nine Nether Blue Blood(50)
Don't say I'm half a month old (50)
Book Friends 20191211210244218, ios (50)
Wanshidandan(30)
Mo Fang(30)
n1chosssss, ios (25)
Tianyi Hall(25)
Mr. Yang 2020 (25)
Miyou Travel Brother Shui (25)
I wish not to speak (25)
Haidian Lao Xue (23.33)
ste__, ios (22)
renyiyu666, ios (20)
tsnkscrj (20)
why is it like this(20)
Millennium Madness(20)
dartsx (20)
Not like a good man(20)
Book Friends 20190413132305620 (20)
Book Friends 20190909014850334 (20)
phantom starphn (20)
The World's Best Princess Sakura, ios (20)
The Young Emperor in White, Su Bai (20)
Asking God why he should commit suicide (20)
My love is unknown (20)
My black village girl (20)
I'm going to be angry (20)
Yan Mushou (20)
The other side of the dream (20)
Pimples (20)
Ahao丨(20)
Southerners look like Northerners (20)
Dijun.(20)
Stars, Three Lights (20)
Mr. Yan (20)
I'm really not a hero (19)
The purple clouds in the sky are colorful (18)
Book Friends 20180227085717735, ios (15)
Rotor Hao(15)
Don’t have any teeth (15)
This works too (13)
23456757 (11)
Di Yi Yan Huan (11)
Hades Emperor's Bloodthirsty Halberd (11)
Floating Life(11)
黾Ke(11)
earthpanda (10)
The Sorrow of God丶(10)
Kou Ding Yi (10)
Archangel Yan, ios (10)
worthless(10)
Book Friends 150426182028998 (10)
Book Friends 161205184550635, ios (10)
Book Friends 20170219224144972 (10)
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Book Friends 20200328091138608 (10)
Book Friends 20200405104527242 (10)
Book Friends 20200422184345696 (10)
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Book Friends 20200428213908492 (10)
Shuimu Bijunya(10)
Under Komodo Behemoth, iOS (10)
Baimo Mulberry(10)
Junmo, laugh(10)
Dumbfounded Chicken 01 (10)
OMGi (10)
I love fishing(10)
Silence0 is the best companion (10)
Wheatfield Harvester 2 (10)
He’s always the same 1 (10)
The shell behind (10)
The humble guest(10)
Ai Wei Men (10)
Haihua17 (10)
A man as handsome as a god (10)
Chasing Dreams 2004 (10)
Meazza 10 ( 10 )
Qing o song(10)
Traces 96 (10)
Black and white(10)
Panda Bullfight(10)
Through the Looking Glass 12138 (10)
Xiaoxiao falls in the rain (9)
Book Friends 20170627212254688 (8)
Oumi Hair(qq)(7.88)
See you tomorrow (7.33)
critical minute(7)
Aitoulan(7)
Dancing Stars (7)
〆Jing Daozi(6)
Book Friends 20200409124813882 (6)
Casual little bookworm(6)
Looking at the maple leaves in late autumn (6)
Dream about black pig(6)
Sui Feng(qq)(5.88)
afotoooo (5)
cmfrrr(5)
cvwenliang(5)
infernosorrow(5)
terinc, ios (5)
yg the sixth day of the lunar month (5)
youjiuzhiyi (5)
zzzuuuuzuzz ( 5 )
A handsome guy who refuses to be named (5)
Life is all in vain (5)
The hurried guest in the world of mortals (5)
Mortal Stars (5)
Fanxue(5)
Feiyu loves to eat cats (5)
Book Friends 131030195920702 (5)
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Book Friends 20200327001606728 (5)
Bookish and bookish (5)
The Pavilion in the Clouds (5)
Jin Xi He Xi Jiang (5)
Tai Er, Feng (5)
Aden who drives a tank (5)
Dancing on a moonlit night, the city is alluring (5)
Waterweed Guru(5)
Qi Shen Qi (5)
Stormy old bookworm(5)
Incompetent (5)
Call me Hengzi (5)
Memories of Bai(5)
Cuna.
ミ, ios (5)
The wandering time of years (5)
Mechanical Box(5)
Plane Merchant 000001 (5)
When you should, ios (5)
Wu Zide courtesy name Lieguang (5)
Zhang Ersui(5)
I trade winter for spring thunder, ios (5)
No one can do it again (5)
ronin sama ( 5 )
Anitian(5)
Very boring(5)
Starlight Shengguang(5)
Interesting (5)
Brother Jin loves to learn (5)
God said he would have you (5)
Forgiveness(5)
Miyouxingshuige, ios (5)
Dream-Walking(5)
There is no such thing as a tool for feelings (5)
Doubanjiang(5)
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Purple air comes slowly from the east (5)
dark night (5)
Silence in the Dark (5)
Zero Emperor ol (5)
Purine hair growth (5)
Small zinc plated(5)
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Register all day (5)
Book Friends 20200225175357305 (4)
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Enthusiastic citizen Abai (4)
Tao Ye (4)
Wait for me at the crossroads (3)
Book Friends 160828002937118 (3)
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Haotian Sky(3)
椋( 3 )
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A man looking up at the stars at 45 degrees (2)
eugene丶Xiansen(2)
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Very poisonous (2)
Book Friends 20181223110501024 (2)
Book Friends 20200104010300486 (2)
Book Friends 20200320094600311 (2)
Let me be happy (qq)(2)
Watch with peace of mind (2)
Butterfly Dance of Time (2)
Beat the Air (2)
Model Yu 3000 (2)
Dongxuan Lingbao True Spirit Position and Industry Map (2)
Watch science fiction (2)
soft feather(2)
Funny devil(qq)(2)
Nanshenlu (2)
Silently be a passerby (2)
279972520 (1)
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A flute to accompany you for a while (1)
Archangel Hongjun(1)
big tomcat(1)
Life in a dark room (1)
Feilongyan Mountain(1)
Ma Shuming(1)
Sleep with the Wolf(1)
Live for fantasy (1)
Book Friends 121208193830039 (1)
Book Friends 140705215022091 (1)
Book Friends 150610225801590 (1)
Book Friends 150707171108316, ios (1)
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Book Stone Stall (1)
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Immortal Heart(1)
Xiansu(1)
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Li Shengren(1)
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hot summer(1)
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Just laugh and learn to dance(1)
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