Wang Xiaoxiao was stunned for a moment after hearing this, and asked: "When I was a teenager--were we taught these things?"
"Yes." Xue Ling nodded: "We won't teach them specifically, but we will subtly instill in them the correct view of mate selection. In addition, if parents are very loving, children will also have a strong idea in their minds about what to look for.
Such people spend their lives together and have more or less ideas."
"My parents have a big influence." Wang Xiaoxiao smiled sheepishly, "My parents are both very traditional older generations. In addition, their careers also determine that they will be more conservative. When we were young and ignorant,
They never taught us how to find a partner or a partner. I think they were too embarrassed to talk about it. However, they have always been very loving and lived peacefully together. Unknowingly, I also felt that I should find someone.
Like-minded people live a stable and peaceful life.”
"Yes." Xue Ling smiled and said: "This should be a very important item in family education. We can't say absolutely, only that the probability is high. Children raised in families with loving parents have good physical and mental health.
They will be healthier and stronger. Children raised in families where parents often have conflicts, noisy and even domestic violence are prone to lack a sense of security, and are prone to deviations and even paranoia when looking for a partner."
Wang Xiaoxiao tentatively asked: "Big brother's girlfriend... what's wrong with her?"
Xue Ling lowered her voice: "Actually, she and Ranran have been separated for a long time, and it's not very polite to talk behind her back. We are just discussing the matter as an example, not deliberately targeting her. She is very prone to anxiety and even paranoia."
"Anxiety?" Wang Xiaoxiao asked: "At work? Or at study?"
Xue Ling replied: "Both. She is the only daughter in her family, and she has high expectations and requirements for her. Maybe it is because she has lived under high pressure for a long time, and she is very eager to succeed, and even... even does things that harm the interests of others.
She did things in exchange for her promotion. Over time, she slowly did things that deviated from moral standards."
Wang Xiaoxiao was a little confused and asked: "Emotionally? Or work?"
Xue Ling had no choice but to give a small example to explain: "At that time, she cared about Ranran very much, and Ranran also loved her. The two people who clearly loved each other were always inseparable, and there was no sense of intimacy between lovers. Later, Ranran may have discovered that she was doing it for herself.
Although she was promoted, she did not hesitate to do things that harmed her colleagues, and we had quarrels one after another. There were too many cold wars and too much noise, so Ranran was tired and broke up with her. She turned around and started to cause trouble for Ranran, and even exposed the privacy of our family.
On the Internet, there was a hysterical 'if you don't get it, destroy it' attitude, which scared us all."
Wang Xiaoxiao was stunned: "...So cruel?"
"Yes." Xue Ling nodded: "I have met her parents and had dinner together. Her mother is a very strong and controlling woman. She loves her daughter very much, but she is also very strict.
, she is not allowed to be inferior to others, and her demands are too high. I guess her problem is mostly related to her mother's style. People are easy to make mistakes under high pressure, especially under high pressure of self-demand."
Wang Xiaoxiao couldn't help but ask: "What happened to her later? Mom, you didn't sue her, did you?"
"No." Xue Ling frowned and whispered: "She... had mental problems and had to be hospitalized. Fortunately, her father was tolerant and knew how to guide her. I heard Ranran say that after she recovered, she participated in the
After participating in poverty alleviation and rural areas training for a few years, she returned to her hometown to work in the provincial capital. After a change of environment and experience, she became more mature and stable, and became more cheerful and sunny."
"Brother, do you still keep in touch with her?" Wang Xiaoxiao asked.
Xue Ling shook his head: "No. They are all very smart people. They understand that after some things have happened, they can't be friends, so why bother to deceive themselves and add to their feelings. However, I heard what their classmates said. They used to study together in graduate school.
We have many classmates and friends in common.”
Wang Xiaoxiao couldn't help but sigh: "She should be a very good girl..."
"Very outstanding." Xue Ling said without concealment: "Not only does she have an outstanding appearance, but she is also extremely smooth in her behavior. However, there is a reason why I am attracted to her."
Wang Xiaoxiao guessed: "My eldest brother may have been influenced by my mother, and he liked career-oriented women at first."
"It has some influence." Xue Ling explained: "When a person grows up, the biggest influence is his parents and family environment. I am a career-oriented woman, and my children all more or less like their career partners.
"
Wang Xiaoxiao chuckled and said: "Mom, the eldest brother later chose the eldest sister-in-law - I think it has something to do with you."
Xue Ling laughed dumbly: "An'an is not an ordinary girl. What's the relationship method? It's impossible, right?"
"Character." Wang Xiaoxiao explained: "Sister-in-law, her temperament is too special and different from ordinary people. However, her character is excellent, as good as your mother. You are both humble, gentle, and have a strong tolerant heart. In terms of dealing with others.
, both have a strong sense of calmness and composure. I should put it this way, that’s probably it anyway.”
Xue Ling smiled and said: "Thank you. Thanks to An An's fate with our family, we can become a family. In fact, teaching children is not a matter of a short while. It has to influence the children in a subtle way every day. If you can do this
, even if the child's view of mate selection deviates, it will not deviate too far. Usually, we don't teach or talk about it, or even deliberately avoid such embarrassing topics. When the child finds someone he likes, he will say something dissatisfied or disapproving.
, can you stop making a fuss?"
How many intensifications of family conflicts do not occur for no reason, let alone arise out of nowhere.
If you don’t teach your children how to choose someone, it may be too late to teach them when they grow up and can make their own choices.
In order to let your child find a partner, you must consciously influence the child in advance and subtly let him form a correct view on mate selection.
"You haven't objected to...others?" Wang Xiaoxiao asked curiously: "For example, Yang Yang? The third child? Or the fourth child?"
Xue Ling nodded: "Yes, but we overcame it in the end. Because they didn't pick the wrong person, including the third child."
Wang Xiaoxiao rolled his eyes and said "oh" in a low voice, not daring to ask any more questions.
Xue Ling chuckled softly: "Actually, the situation of the third child is very special. It was really not easy for Ranran's father and I to go through this test. However, we finally made it through. You all chose the right one.
Your own people, the people you love, that’s enough.”
Wang Xiaoxiao couldn't help but mutter: "Aqing is really impeccable, whether it's family background, personal accomplishment, character, or how he conducts himself in the world. It's not enough to say he's 'one in a million'. On the other hand, as long as he overcomes the prejudice
, he is a perfect son-in-law."
Xue Ling smiled slightly and replied: "The third child is not wrong, it is just a test of the parents' strength."
"Mom! Mom!" the second son's signature loud voice sounded from the living room.