Chapter five hundred and eighty-ninth the county magistrate is here, and the goose city is saved
August 20, evening
At a movie theater in Quancheng, Han Jun held a movie ticket for "Let the Bullets Fly" and queued up to check in.
"Let the Bullets Fly" has been released for two days. As a die-hard Zuo Le fan, I should have supported it immediately. However, I couldn't help myself because I was working, so I didn't get around to it until I got off work today, Friday.
I originally planned to bring my wife with me, but she didn't expect that she was not interested, so Han Jun had to come alone.
After checking in and entering the theater to sit down, Han Jun was looking forward to it.
After "Let the Bullets Fly" was released, it aroused a lot of discussion on the Internet in a short period of time, and Zhihu became a collective climax. Various analysis posts appeared in an endless stream. In the past two days, just having the account banned cost a few bucks.
The buzz was so loud that even Han Jun was afraid of being spoiled, so he couldn't help but browse it. He was filled with a lot of analysis that would be "terrifying if you think about it carefully".
This also made Han Jun want to see the true face of the movie "Let the Bullets Fly" more and more, so he immediately booked tickets as soon as he had time.
While waiting for the movie to start, a young man with glasses sitting next to Han Jun was praising "Let the Bullets Fly" to his friends.
"This movie is so awesome. I've watched it for the fourth time. Every time it surprises me more and more. When you watch it for a while, don't pay too much attention to the superficial plot and make bold connections."
The friend was stunned by the words of the bespectacled young man and nodded honestly. Han Jun heard that he had swiped three times, and then thought about the analysis he had read on the Internet, and silently kept these words in his heart.
Soon, the movie started, and the familiar animations of dragon logos and mountains and rivers flashed by.
There was an eagle cry that filled the sky, and then the eagle flew around the mountain, and a beautiful female voice sang "Farewell".
"Outside the long pavilion, beside the ancient road, the green grass reaches the sky..."
As the camera zoomed in, several horses were running between the two railway tracks, pulling a luxury train.
Han Jun immediately compared it with the movie analysis of those big guys in his memory.
Horse drawn train, horse drawn train.
Be particular!
The camera came into the car, and there were three people, two men and one woman, surrounding a big pot, singing heartily.
The girl is the county magistrate's wife played by Yan Ni, the one with long hair is the county magistrate Ma Bangde played by Uncle Ge, the one with short hair and glasses is Master Tang, and Zuo Le himself makes a guest appearance.
As a master, Zuo Le is well versed in the art of cheering and flattering. When the county magistrate and his wife finished singing, they immediately clapped and applauded.
Ma Bond was very proud of himself: "I, Ma, have traveled all over the country, relying on my ability in literature and martial arts to be different. I not only eat, drink and have fun, but also have snow, moon, wind and flowers."
"good."
Mr. Tang, played by Zuo Le, has a dog-like face: "The demeanor of County Magistrate Ma is just like the strong wind and the flying clouds↗"
It has to be said that thanks to Zuo Le's tireless efforts to "spoil himself" over the years, he has accumulated a deep connection with the audience.
In addition, there was Uncle Ge, who was very popular with the people, and the two of them acted against each other, causing laughter in the theater.
However, Uncle Ge and Zuo Le were not happy for long. Just as they were eating hot pot and singing songs in the train, a group of bandits were staring at them with guns on the hillside not far away.
Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang
When the gun came out, Zhang Mazi, played by Jiang Wen, coolly put his gun away and folded his arms. The six sons next to him were played by Chu Yuan. He looked at the horses and trains at the foot of the mountain as usual.
"Missed?"
Zhang Mazi smiled calmly: "Let the bullets fly for a while."
The BGM sounds, and the trumpet, cello, viola, piano and other instruments play a symphony. The tunes are bright and high-spirited, making people feel comfortable.
Along with the BGM, the bandits were dispatched en masse. Within half a minute, the county magistrate and his wife were arrested, and the master and the guards were all killed.
I thought that the man who could pull a horse-drawn train was a fat sheep no matter what, but he didn't expect that he had no money, goods, or silver.
Zhang Mazi took the alarm clock, twisted it around and placed it in front of the only two survivors.
"Tell me where the money is hidden."
The county magistrate was very frightened, but the county magistrate's wife was very calm and told Zhang Mazi's identity directly. Only then did everyone know that they had robbed the county magistrate.
However, the county magistrate, Ma Bangde, was afraid of death and lied that he was the master, and the dead master Tang was used as a substitute.
Then, in order to save his life, he offered to become the county magistrate to make money, and then gave the money to Zhang Mazi.
But Zhang Mazi thought of a new idea after hearing what he said.
"Master, your surname is yours."
“Expensive.”
"What's your last name?"
"Surname is Tang."
"Master Tang, I will be the county magistrate, and you will continue to be my master. Let's take a trip to Echeng."
No matter that Ma Bangde, who had turned from the county magistrate to the master, looked doubtful about life, Zhang Mazi turned to look at the county magistrate's wife again.
"Madam, would you like to take a trip?"
"Just leave."
Zhang Mazi chuckled, picked up the alarm clock in his hand and threw it up, accompanied by the sound of gunfire.
"Brothers, take office, Goose City!"
………
The movie "Let the Bullets Fly" has just started, and the plot has not yet unfolded. It only introduces the background and causes.
Compared with the plot, the actors' concise and coherent dialogue lines and the wonderful performances of Jiang Wen, Uncle Ge, Zuo Le and others are what impress the audience the most.
For example, Han Jun felt that watching this movie had a special pleasure and was very enjoyable.
When everyone arrived at Goose City, they received a welcome ceremony and a warning at the city gate, as well as several wanted notices for Zhang Mazi posted outside the city wall.
Unfortunately, this wanted poster looks nothing like Zhang Mazi himself, more like Zhu Yuanzhang with a pockmarked face and an afro.
Shrewd and furious!
The welcome ceremony was led by Sister Hua played by Shui Miaomiao, which made people appreciate the heroic appearance of the national goddess playing drums.
The ones who showed off their power were Hu Wan and Wu Zhichong. The former was Sha Yi, who wore a traitor's hair parted, and the latter was played by Zhou Binbin, who had a perm and curls.
A die-hard fan like Han Jun, who has watched "The Story of the Cooking Class" countless times, looked at Shuai Hu standing next to the sedan chair. For a time, he thought that the person in the sedan chair was the squad leader Pang Hong, and almost made a scene.
But soon, the plot was brought back to the plot by the two men's truly "mischievous" actions with their hands in their crotches.
Then they pulled out the sedan. There was no one inside, only a hat. Then they stepped on the sedan bars and shouted in unison.
"Top hat, courtesy, welcome to the county magistrate."
They said they were being polite, but their actions such as picking up their crotch and stepping on the sedan chair were not civilized at all.
Through the introduction of the master, the audience understood that there was a land tiger in Echeng, named Huang Silang, who owned half of the southern country's human trafficking and tobacco business.
Hu Wan and Wu Zhichong are Huang Silang's lackeys and thugs respectively. They are here today to teach the new county magistrate how to behave.
Zhang Mazi smiled calmly: "The person who came here is not kind."
The master glanced at him and reminded: "You are the one here."
There is something in the words, absolutely amazing!
Zhang Mazi and others rode into the city. On a high platform in the city, Fa Ge, played by Fa Ge, was observing the new county magistrate with a telescope, and at the same time commanded and trained a substitute who looked very similar to himself.
"Take a few steps."
"Go out and make a fuss."
"A journey that will take you thousands of miles."
"Coming out of a world feels like a lifetime ago!"
"..."
Huang Silang observed and trained his substitute, and Zhang Mazi also started to establish his own authority after entering the city.
He put on the guards who were killed during the train robbery, put on bandit's hoods, pretended to be bandits, and shot them all again to show his strength as the new county magistrate.
Ma Bond, who has entered the role of master, spoke loudly.
"The county magistrate is here, Echeng is at peace."
"When the county magistrate comes, there will be blue sky."
Zhang Mazi's strength aroused Huang Silang's dissatisfaction, and he stared at Zhang Mazi coldly.
"Exposing your domineering attitude will lead to death."
Huang Silang planned to play with Zhang Mazi, but Zhang Mazi, who had just entered the city, unceremoniously slept with the county magistrate's wife.
At first, the thick stick and magnifying glass scenes suggested by Jiang Wen were too cumbersome when editing, so they were not included in the main film, but it was not wasted. When the trailer was released, countless viewers praised it.
"Put me down, this is not a bus to kindergarten."
………
After sleeping with the county magistrate's wife, we came to the famous scene of "Let the Bullets Fly", which is also a widely circulated joke in the past two days.
Han Jun has seen several text versions and magically modified versions on the Internet, but this is the first time for a genuine movie.
The following is required to be recited in full.
boom
"late."
The master was shocked in annoyance: "We are late. The previous county magistrates have already collected the tax revenue one hundred and twenty years later, which is the year 2030 in the Western calendar. We are in the wrong place."
Good guy.
Han Jun was stunned, thinking that if the people of Echeng lived to this day, they would still owe three years of taxes.
Rounding it all off, this is someone who drank the blood of several generations in one breath...
The master was upset, but Zhang Mazi was calm.
"I think this place is pretty good."
"The people have become poor and have no money to squeeze out!"
"I have never wanted poor people's money."
"Whose money are you going to take if you don't scratch the poor guy's money?"
"Whoever has money gets it."
The master looked disdainful: "Have you ever been a county magistrate?"
Zhang Mazi shook his head: "No"
The master called Zhang Mazi closer: "I'll tell you."
"When the county magistrate takes office, he has to create a clever name, win over the gentry, pay taxes and donations, and they pay, so that the people can follow suit. After receiving the money, the gentry's money will be returned in full, and the people's money will be divided into 30 and 70."
"Why is it only 70%?"
"Seventy percent belongs to others, and getting 30% depends on Huang Silang's face."
"Whose face?"
"Huang Shilang."
"Huang Silang? I came all the way here just to see his face?"
"right."
Zhang Mazi rolled up his sleeves, pulled the master over and asked.
"I finally robbed a train and became the county magistrate."
"right."
"Do I still want to win over the wealthy gentry?"
"right."
"You still want to create a clever name?"
"correct.
"Do you still want to see TM's face?"
"right."
"Then am I no longer a beggar on my knees?"
"Then if you want to put it this way, buying an official position and becoming a county magistrate is really just kneeling down to beg for food. That's it. How many people want to kneel down but don't have the skills to do so!"
Zhang Mazi breathed out, put his arms around Master's shoulders, and said again.
"Let me ask you, why should I go up the mountain to be a bandit?"
The master shook his head, expressing confusion.
"My legs and feet just aren't strong enough and I can't kneel down."
The master suddenly realized: "So you want to make money while standing, so you'd better go back to the mountains."
"Hey, I don't understand this. I've already become a county magistrate, why am I worse than a bandit?"
"In the eyes of the people, you are the county magistrate, but in the eyes of Huang Silang, you are just kneeling down to beg for food."
Master’s sincere advice.
"It's good to make money. Business is not shabby."
"It's so shabby. It's so damn shabby."
"Then do you want to stand still, or do you want to make money?"
"I just wanted to stand and make money!"
"Can't make money."
"Can't you make money?"
"You can't make it!"
Zhang Mazi took out his gun, slapped it on the table, and asked, "Can I make money from this?"
"You can make money in the mountains."
Zhang Mazi picked up the gavel again and asked, "Can I make money from this?"
"If you can earn it, kneel down."
Zhang Mazi placed the gun and the gavel together: "With this, can you stand and make money?"
The master raised his hand and said, "Dare I ask Brother Jiutong, who is so sacred?"
"My dear, Zhang Mazi!"
After hearing these last five words, Han Jun's whole body went numb. This line was so amazing.
The most ridiculous thing is that this phrase can be combined with many realities.
Men and women in love, bankers and leeks in stock trading, real estate developers and residents, live broadcast platforms and anchors, postgraduate students and tutors...
Even international affairs and the relationship between countries can be perfectly integrated into the lines. It is worthy of being praised by many viewers and even jokingly said that it can be "inscribed on the World Heritage List".
However, this part of "Let the Bullets Fly" is not the only one that can be "listed as a World Heritage Site". This movie really has no flaws, with high energy one after another.
Zhang Mazi asked Liuzi to accuse the county government office of being abandoned for a long time, and the master came up with another famous saying.
"How can there be any injustice? Who dares to have any injustice? It's been more than 100 years. If you really try to drum it up, you may not know how much injustice there will be."
This sentence is heartbreaking every word.
Without grievances, there will be no more grievances, just like Meili Guo and Asan. As long as there is no testing, there will be no new cases, and naturally there will be no deaths.
As long as I can't see, the world is peaceful and peaceful.
As for people dying of illness?
To borrow a famous quote from a former president: This may be life...
Han Jun laughed when he saw it. If it weren't for the politeness of watching movies, he couldn't help but applaud.
After being released, the waiter chased a waiter selling jelly. While the waiter was dodging, he bumped into Wu Zhichong and was severely beaten by Wu Zhichong.
All this was seen by Zhang Mazi, who took the waiter and Wu Zhichong into the county government office.
As soon as the waiter entered the Yamen, he started to cry out for Wu Zhichong, which made people feel sad.
Wu Zhichong, relying on Huang Silang's support, didn't take Zhang Mazi seriously at all, and screamed like crazy.
There is a detail here. Wu Zhichong claimed to be a member of the civil and military examinations in the 31st year of Guangxu's reign. However, historically, the civil and military examinations were canceled in the 30th year of Guangxu's reign.
You taste it, you taste it carefully.
Wu Zhichong yelled wildly, but when Zhang Mazi took out the gun, he immediately knelt down and was punished by Zhang Mazi, who forced him to kowtow to the waiter to apologize.
After taking care of Wu Zhichong, Zhang Mazi came to the people watching the excitement outside the door with a gun. Everyone hurriedly knelt down and shouted in unison.
"Master Qingtian."
Zhang Mazi raised his hand and fired his gun into the sky, saying to everyone.
"Get up, don't kneel."
"The emperor is gone, there is no one worthy of your kneeling."
"I'm not worthy of your knees either."
"I only came to Goose City to do three things: fairness, fairness, and fucking fairness!"
After everyone heard this, they knelt down and shouted "Master Qingtian" again, and Zhang Mazi fired his gun into the sky again.
"Stand up! No kneeling!"
hiss
Seeing this paragraph, Han Jun took a deep breath and got goosebumps all over his body.
The bespectacled young man and his friend next to him were even more excited and flushed with excitement, shouting softly.
