540. It’s better to have a good time over a drink than to meet in war.
"You damn kid!"
Empress Shiji poked the monkey on the head hard, which made the monkey feel embarrassed and helpless. She thought that he would walk in the sea first and then reach the sky, and he would rise to poverty and fall to the underworld, with a proud body and a pair of iron arms.
He has taken the elixir of Sanqing, stolen the flat peaches of the Queen Mother, been burned by real fire and struck by divine thunder. Even if he has been suppressed for five hundred years, he will still emerge as the beautiful monkey from Huaguoshan who melted stone into armor and turned into a robe of flames.
Wang Qitian, the great sage Sun Wukong. He is unruly and never bows his head. He would rather kill fish in RT-Mart than go to any old friend to ask for a better life.
But now, someone shouted "dead child".
"Why can't you learn? We are monsters, and monsters are monsters. If you hang out with those things, can you reap the rewards?"
"Fruit? What fruit?"
Hearing the stinky monkey's joke, Empress Shiji stamped her foot, stared and said, "Don't fool around in front of my aunt!"
"Aunt~~Those are all buddies."
"It's not like they are brothers. They have never looked down on us demon spirits. Even if they don't say it, they just feel that they are superior to us. I have seen too many of them."
Facing Empress Shiji's reprimand, Monkey couldn't say anything. He could only lower his head and kept saying "Yes, yes," but if he could listen, he wouldn't be Xun Wukong.
"Aunt~~What should I do with this thing?"
The monkey kicked the ascetic boat lying next to him. The octagonal monster next to him immediately bared his teeth at him. The monkey rolled his eyes: "Little goblin, do you dare to grin at grandpa? If you dare to make a fuss again, grandpa will pull out all your teeth."
!”
The octagonal monster was also a bully and fearful of evil. Being frightened by the monkey's revealed true form, it rolled and crawled behind the ascetic boat, only daring to reveal a pair of compound eyes on its forehead to peek furtively.
"Okay, don't mess with such dirty things." Empress Shiji also disliked the octagonal monster: "Auntie asked you, have you heard about the new god?"
"What kind of deity? What kind of deity?"
Upon hearing this, Empress Shi Ji knew that this silly monkey didn't know the situation, so she asked him to sit down: "Back then, you failed to catch up with the ceremony of conferring gods, and in the end, only Bima Wen fell behind. This opportunity
You can't miss it anymore, find a family member and go there, maybe even your aunt will follow you to enjoy the blessing."
"I have defected to so many families, and which one has a good ending. Well, if you ask me, I might as well just be an idle monkey in a free world, drinking dew when I'm thirsty and eating grasshoppers when I'm hungry."
Empress Shiji slapped the table in anger: "Why are you so hopeless? What a great opportunity now, once in a lifetime. Your aunt lost her life in exchange for Yue Youxingjun's broken inheritance. You have to take advantage of the opportunity to seize it."
If you take the title of True Lord, that’s the best thing you can do. I don’t care if you don’t want to accept your shabby battle to defeat the Buddha.”
"What kind of Bodhisattva or Buddha, let alone a true king? I want to be the Great Sage Equaling Heaven. Who cares about those false names?"
"You bastard!" Empress Shiji was furious: "It's been so many years, why haven't you grown up at all?"
The monkey was a little angry as he sat there. He thought that he had gone through hardships in the past, but in the end he failed to succeed. In the end, even if he became a fighting and victorious Buddha, he was not happy at all.
He said that repeated extermination of Buddha led to the destruction of Lingshan. When he, the deputy director of the marketing department, went on a business trip, his company was bankrupt. Just saying that he, an elf wandering in the world, eats food and chants Buddha every day is simply a waste of his monkey nature.
, he really couldn’t eat or live, so he had long since given up those thoughts over the years, and planned to just live his life as a stinky monkey.
"Auntie~~ don't look at what I am now. I am only as strong as a stick, 13,500 kilograms, and only weighs six tons. Any car on the street has four fronts and eight rears.
I can pull more than twenty golden hoops." The monkey said, even a little frustrated: "It's not that I don't want to, it's just that I really can't."
After hearing what the monkey said, Empress Shiji felt a little sorry. She stepped forward and asked curiously: "Is there any way to recover?"
The monkey shook his head: "I don't know, anyway, I'm just a little stronger than ordinary people."
When he said this, the monkey didn't intend to talk about this topic anymore. He just continued to talk about the ascetic boat on the ground: "You can bring this thing here for whatever purpose, and you are not afraid of getting yourself into trouble."
"What trouble can I cause? Is there any trouble in the world that I'm afraid of?"
Seeing that Empress Shiji didn't seem to know what was going on, the monkey smiled and stepped forward to give a rough description of the situation after the Ascetic Boat was injured. Although the monkey didn't know that Qing Lingzi had left his two hands after he left.
A little friend was beaten to the ground, but he knew that Ku Xing Zhou had offended someone very badly and was beaten like that.
As for why he is an extraordinary person, monkeys are not stupid. For a person from the age of gods to be beaten like this now, he can figure it out without even thinking about it with his cecum.
After listening to the monkey's description, Empress Shiji's expression became solemn, and the best way to deal with it now is to rescue the ascetic boat and ask questions.
I have to praise Empress Shiji for her wonderful brain circuit. The monkey hesitated several times, but finally did not say anything. After all, this cheap aunt of mine has taken good care of herself in the past many years, so let him, the monkey who jumped out of the stone,
He can somewhat feel the warmth of home. In his heart, the status of this aunt is equal to or even higher than that of his master. So even if his aunt's brain is a little clearer, she can do whatever she wants. The most important thing is to accompany her.
So what if she breaks Ling Xiao again.
But obviously Shu Xingzhou's injury is not easy to cure, who are you kidding... The wounds caused by Chi You's Demonic Blade cannot be easily cured even if the demonic energy is removed from them, but Empress Shiji is stronger after all. Today
He must be cured.
As for the little octagonal monster, that thing is considered a ferocious monster in the human world, but now it is a gouba in the three realms. Not to mention Shiji Empress, even the monkey with seven levels of debuffs did not take it seriously.
.
At the same time, Brother Zhang had already eaten. Sitting opposite Brother Zhang was Erlang Zhenjun, with Zhang Xu on the left and Nezha on the right. The atmosphere was very subtle, but Zhang Xu didn't understand anything.
Nezha is no longer the super naughty kid he used to be. His sharp edges have been smoothed out over the years in Heaven. Although he is still the darkest after being cut open, at least on the surface this middle-aged Nezha is extremely smooth.
He was pouring wine for Brother Zhang and chatting with him about anecdotes about the Three Realms. He tried every possible means to please all kinds of charming people, but there were only four words between the lines - give it to me.
On the other hand, this guy Yang Jian is a tough guy. From the beginning to now, he has always had a face that is neither a face nor a nose. He has a bad face the whole time. When he looked at Brother Zhang, he felt like he was seeing the enemy who killed his father.
"You don't have to hate me so much. It's you who likes to cause trouble. When we signed the agreement, I did treat you all as Category B and A. But the problem is that you have to say it with your own conscience. Every time you go to the lower world for so many years, you are
Isn’t something going to happen?”
Brother Zhang said very frankly. He had wanted to have a good chat with this guy for a long time, but it seemed that the chat was not very successful this time. Yang Jian's attitude was still not very good. After all, in addition to the previous grudges, there were more
Ichijo Qinglingzi knocked them over. Everyone is shameless, and they are all respectable people. Now they are being bullied like little chickens. To be honest, I can't bear it.
"Actually, the seal I gave you is not a fixed seal."
When Brother Zhang said this, Yang Jian finally had some reaction, and Nezha pricked up his ears and started to listen. Brother Zhang just smiled and said, "You will know when the time comes."
After saying that, he got up and left, paying for Nezha and the others along the way.
When Nezha saw him leaving, he let out a sigh of relief, grabbed a handful of peanuts and rubbed them into his mouth: "Damn, I'm so nervous in front of him."
Zhang Xu, who had been confused throughout the whole process, asked, "Two masters, who is he? Why don't you feel that your expressions are natural?"
Nezha glanced at her three times, then cleared his throat: "Children, don't ask so many questions."
To say that Sanyan is the most sincere person, he raised his head slightly, glanced at Zhang Xu and said, "He is supreme."
"ah?"
Zhang Xu was stunned for a moment: "He is the 'him' you often call him?"
"Yeah." Nezha nodded mysteriously: "It has to be three eyes. You are so scornful at him. It's really because he has always had a good temper. He will give it to you if he has a bad temper.
Catch him and cast him into reincarnation. You love dogs so much, and the underworld will work overtime to cast you into a wild dog."
When Sanyaner heard this, he slapped Kuaizi on the table: "Don't say anything if you don't know how to speak!"
Zhang Xu now turned into a curious baby, leaned over and asked with a smile: "Master Li, why do you feel that Master Yang... doesn't have a good relationship with him?"
"If someone robbed your dog, you wouldn't like him. Hey... forget it, Sanyan'er won't tell you, so I'll tell you. What's going on..." Nezha said this
, glanced at her three times: "Can I say no? If I can't, I won't say it."
As soon as Yang Jian waved his hand, he took it as an excuse and let him go.
"The story begins with King Wu's defeat of Zhou. We generally believe that King Zhou was the last human emperor. After him, there will only be the Son of Heaven in the world, and the Son of Heaven, as you know, is the one who is ordered by Heaven. Here
First of all, it involves the relationship between human rights and heaven-given rights. And it was during this period that the world's capable people and strangers neither became gods nor immortals, nor did they break the earth and become princes. What did they do?
For a non-governmental organization, the specific name is not important, but it shares the same name and is called the Holy Lord."
"Ah, Holy Lord! I have heard of it."
"Well, the Holy Lord's lineage was just to protect the purity of the human world at the beginning, and professionally fought against the heavenly world for three thousand years, you know."
Zhang Xu blinked: "Can you beat me?"
"You underestimate the world's heroes too much." Nezha laughed heartily: "The one who defeated us in a 1V3 group just now was a member of the Holy Lord's lineage. And we call such a tough person Earth Immortal. I have read Journey to the West.
Well, Zhen Yuanzi has heard about it, I’ll beat up your Monkey Master... Well, the guy who just beat us up, Zhen Yuanzi should call him senior brother when he sees it."
"Hiss~~~" Zhang Xu took a breath: "Then what?"
"The human race has established its own civilization circle step by step in their struggle. At this time, I went to the Three Realms and saw that it was incredible. How could there be so many people in the human world all of a sudden? If I don't intervene, I can't control it."
"After that, the upper three realms and the human realm launched a... well, in today's terms, it was a culture war. The contention of a hundred schools of thought that we saw later was the sequelae of this culture war. Regardless of whether it is good or bad for the time being,
It was because of the culture war between the two sides at that time that the human world found its own route. What is that? You can be the emperor and the emperor, but if the people think you are not good, then they will be in the Holy Lord line.
Under the leadership of the emperor, he overthrew the emperor and made his mother's emperor his son." When Nezha said this, he couldn't help but pat his thigh: "This group of people is really powerful, and they are not far behind in the fight with the Three Realms. And
By the late Spring and Autumn Period and the Warring States Period, this situation had intensified, and it was not uncommon for you to ascend the throne today and step down the next.”
"Yes, yes, it was really chaotic at that time."
"Then both sides saw that it was impossible to continue like this. The top needed the resources of the human world, and the bottom needed the reproduction of the human race. No one would be able to make a profit if this quarrel continued. So they called together people from the upper three realms and the mountains and seas to sit down and have a meeting.
meeting."
Yang Jian knocked on the table: "On Tao."
"Yes, let's talk about the Tao." Nezha patted his mouth: "Look at my bad mouth, I'm just not as educated as my brother Sanyan'er."
After he finished speaking, he glanced three times before continuing: "The result of the meeting is that the upper three realms will no longer interfere with the human world, but the human world must also be controlled, so every force will send one to
Two people are responsible for supervision, but who to send is a big problem. If you go to the enemy camp as supervisors, can you still have your juice?"
"Yeah... indeed."
"Finally, I came up with a particularly cool idea, which is to send the twelve zodiac animals down. Each animal is responsible for a technology such as industry, agriculture, animal husbandry, etc., and they are responsible for spreading these technologies to the human world. For example, the Twelve Spirits
The rat was passed down to all the people to weave cloth and shoes, the dragon was passed down to all the people, the sun and the moon were passed down to the four calendars to obtain the twenty-four solar terms, etc. Later, people praised it and it became a tradition and it has been passed down to this day. In fact, it is very awesome. If you don’t believe it, go back and look at you.
If you look at the perpetual calendar, you will find that the twenty-four solar terms in the past are almost exactly the same as now, which brings great convenience to farming and nomadic people.”
Zhang Xu blinked his eyes, listening with relish: "Then what."
"Then?" Nezha laughed loudly: "The Xiaotian Dog is on the list of dispatches... No, Sanyan'er has hated the Holy Lord of the World all the way up to now."