Disclaimer: This article has nothing to do with the content of "There is a Goddess in My Freezer". Today is August 20, the fifteenth day of the seventh lunar month, which is the traditional Ghost Festival of the Ghost Festival.

It is the birthday of Lu Zuo, the protagonist of "The Miao Border Gu Incident". I am writing this article to express my congratulations. I am posting it here to enjoy it with my readers.

The content of this article is based on the plot of the Gu incident in Miaojiang and the characteristics of the main characters. My own role has been added. It is purely fabricated and absurd. It is only for the enjoyment of everyone.

Friends who have read my articles know that I, Lin You, am like this. I will send a single chapter of scolding to those who cannot stand it, even if it offends them; I will send a single chapter as a gift to friends who are sincere and sincere. In life,

Laughing, yelling, and cursing all follow one's own heart, but you want to be at ease and have a clear conscience.

Everyone, if you haven't read "The Gu Story of Miao Border", I would like to take this opportunity to recommend it. You can easily find this book on various lists of Iron Grinding.

text:

August 20, 2013.

Guangdong, Dongguan.

The weather was so hot and there was no business at all. I stuck the spoon in the cup out of boredom and stirred a cup of coffee, releasing a rich aroma.

This is authentic Blue Mountain coffee. It is extremely fragrant, slightly sweet and slightly sour, and has a soft and smooth taste. It is definitely the undoubted king of coffee. Even in Jamaica, the only producing area of ​​Blue Mountain coffee, it can only be grown at high altitudes.

Only coffee beans produced from coffee trees in the Blue Mountain area that are more than 1,800 meters tall are qualified to be called Blue Mountain coffee.

If I said this coffee was grown in my friend’s backyard, would you believe it?

This friend, who is full of mystery, also runs an office, which is directly opposite my office. The business is very large, and all the celebrities come in and out. However, the business of my office is indifferent every day, and there is no business.

Thanks to his help, I can still occasionally get some business. But his business is all incredible. My detective agency can help very little. However, here, I can often make money.

I got some high-quality coffee beans grown in his backyard. For me, it doesn’t matter how much money I make, but living happily is what matters.

At this moment, this friend of mine is not in Dongguan, but is recuperating in Zhuhai. I heard that at the end of last year, he and a group of friends jointly resisted the Evil Spirit Cult, beat the crap out of a group of vicious guys, and successfully saved the world.

At the moment, he is in a quiet place in Zhuhai, writing a book with peace of mind, saying that he will record all the bizarre experiences he had after his grandmother gave him the golden silkworm poison in 2007. However, the title of the book has not been decided yet.

I once heard this friend talk about some things in his past. It was indeed full of twists and turns and unbelievable. If it were all recorded, I'm afraid many people wouldn't believe it is true.

That's right, just like my past experiences, no one is willing to believe them to be true. People who are used to living a quiet and stable life every day, listening to other people's bizarre stories is acceptable, and it can be regarded as passing the time. If you say this, etc.

Things are real and may happen in reality at any time, but everyone will be afraid to avoid them.

I just put down the spoon and wanted to pick up the coffee to drink. A plump bug with a golden body appeared out of nowhere, got into my coffee cup and took a big sip of the coffee. I saw that this was hard-won.

The coffee was almost half gone in an instant. I felt a pain in my balls, so I inserted my fingers into the coffee, pinched the guy's butt, took it out, threw it on the table, and slapped it until it turned into a flat patty.

This guy didn't seem to be in any pain at all, and returned to its original state in a blink of an eye. It looked at me with two black bean-like eyes, and chirped a few times, seeming very aggrieved. I held it in my hand,

Said: "I want to drink coffee at your house..."

At this moment, the door of the office was banged open, and a hot, miniature girl with a fiery figure crossed her hands on her bulging chest, looked at me with raised eyebrows, and said in an extremely arrogant manner: "Lin You, you are bullying my family again.

Fatty!”

I smiled bitterly, pointed at the half-cup of coffee left, and said, "I just drank the cup of Blue Mountain coffee I just brewed. Girl, do you think I'm depressed?"

This miniature hot girl named Xiaoyao refused to give up and said: "Tsk, who grew the coffee you drink?"

"Yes... you planted it..."

"It's good that you know! My dear, I have worked so hard to grow such good coffee here. I can give it to whoever I want to drink!" This little demon walked in with his chest crossed. I really couldn't control that instinct.

, looking towards her chest...

Suddenly, the cactus on the desk grew crazily. In an instant, it grew to more than half a meter, like a human palm, swaying in the air. The top thorns stood up straight, and it was about to hit me.

Swing it.

I quickly begged for mercy and said: "Yes, little demon girl, you have been a wise and powerful warrior for generations through the ages...please spare me..."

Xiaoyao then suppressed the fake look on her face, couldn't hold it back any longer, and burst out laughing. Before she could speak, a clear voice from outside the door sounded: "I said Xiaoyao, you bring Feifei here every day.

Is it fun to bully your Uncle You?"

The man who flashed in outside the door was extremely handsome, with an oval face, thin lips, a pair of sword eyebrows, and a very heroic look. He wore a Taoist priest-like bun and wore a Taoist robe.

, always exudes a wretched air that is inconsistent with the overall temperament. As soon as this person entered the door, he stretched out his hand, reaching to the top of the little demon's head, while saying: "Okay, lead Fei Fei out, Uncle Dao wants to follow

Uncle You talks about business."

When the little demon saw the palm touching her head, she swayed and tried to avoid it. However, for some reason, the Taoist priest's hand seemed to turn into several shadows in an instant, making it difficult for people to see clearly. When she looked closely,

, but still pressed it calmly, right on the little demon's head, and touched the little demon's black hair like a waterfall.

This Taoist priest is really a master, and he shows himself to be extraordinary as soon as he strikes. Seeing that the little demon couldn't dodge, his momentum suddenly weakened by three points. He puffed up his cheeks, flattened his mouth, and said: "Huh, don't come here, who doesn't know that you are going to do it again?"

Taking Uncle You to look for flowers and willows?"

I finally couldn't help it and laughed out loud. The Taoist priest's dirty mind was revealed, and he looked a little embarrassed and said: "Your brother Lu Zuo said that a very strange incident happened in Zhuhai recently! You Lu Zuo

My brother said that he wants me and your uncle to take a look together. If we can solve it smoothly, it will be a good thing. Aren't I here to discuss business?"

The little demon looked me over, and seeing my pretended righteous face, he still didn't believe it, and said: "We destroyed the Evil Spirit Sect last year, how could there be any weird things? That's all, I'm leaving, little girl.

I’m delaying your discussion of business matters. Fei Fei, let’s go!”

The fat golden bug, which I was holding tightly in my hand, penetrated my claws like a ghost and flew out the door following the little demon. As soon as the little fox went out, the little fox that was there just now was

The cactus that was waving around immediately returned to its original shape.

Looking at this pair of living treasures, I couldn't help but smile, shake my head, and sigh.

Seeing that there was no one else in the room, the Taoist priest slammed the door, pulled up a swivel chair and sat at the table. He put his head over and said hoarsely: "How was it? Yesterday's Nile Royal Club was not bad, was it? I traveled all over Dongguan City.

I can't find another goldfish tank that's so powerful. You kid, you were so timid on the spot that you escaped by peeing. Forget it, I'll give you another chance tonight. Let's get two pounds of Erguotou to give you strength.

Be brave and try again?"

I quickly waved my hand and said: "Comrade Lao Xiao, you have magical body protection skills, endless romance, and are proficient in the art of harvesting yin and replenishing yang. You are more energetic after ten rests a night, but you have to drag me, a mortal, all day long.

The lay people have gone to various places to donate their essence, but it’s really too much for me..."

The Taoist priest surnamed Xiao chuckled and said: "Old Lin, how can I be romantic? The mortal world refines the heart, and the mortal world refines the heart. Don't think wrongly. Immeasurable Heavenly Lord..."

I couldn't hear his last words the most, so I hurriedly said: "Let me tell you, Keming, you go around to comfort women who have lost their feet under the guise of refining your heart in the world of mortals, but you always drag me, a person who studied law, to hang out with you. This is

The Mid-Autumn Festival is approaching, and the police uncle has to collect money and give out bonuses again. When we encounter a raid, you just disappeared without a trace with just a few charms. What should I do?"

"Look what you said," Xiao Keming slapped me in the face and said, "Do I look like a person who ran away from battle? Do you think that the magic talisman passed down by my master is used to hide from the police? I pulled you

As a law student, aren't you thinking that if something goes wrong, can you be my free defense lawyer? I see, you are not afraid of the police, but you are afraid of the goddess coming out of your freezer and punishing you.

Kneel on the washboard and use the CPU remote control, right?"

My old face turned red and I hurriedly continued: "You still expect me to be your defense lawyer when you are stuck in bed by the police? It is only proper to pay the fine. By the way, you just mentioned what happened in Zhuhai."

?Tell me about it. By the way, isn't Lu Zuo recuperating and writing a book in Zhuhai these days? If something happens, can't he just go and handle it?"

"Hey, what's the matter? I'm bluffing that little demon, otherwise you'll get smeared in the face by that cactus and you'll lose your soup today, right? But having said that, that little poison guy just called me, and I suddenly

I remembered something. We have to go to Zhuhai in person. Do you know that tomorrow is the Ghost Festival?"

"Haunted? I said to Lao Xiao, hauntings are within the jurisdiction of your Mao Jin Feng Shui Consulting Firm. Are you coming to my detective agency to ask me to be cannon fodder? You two will punish each other with thunder.

With a ghost sword, a married woman's mirror, and a group of invincible friends accompanying you, what else can't you handle? I don't know any Taoism, and I might even get hooked if I see a ghost.

I lost my body, ran naked on the street in a state of confusion, and made the headlines in the newspaper the next day!" As soon as I heard what he was talking about, I knew that this was beyond my ability, so I quickly shied away.

"You're wrong," Xiao Keming said for a long time. His mouth was already dry and he licked his lips. Seeing that there was still half a cup of coffee in the cup, he couldn't help but snatch it away and drank it. When I wanted to stop him, the coffee had already been poured.

Xiao Keming put down the cup and breathed a sigh of contentment. Seeing my nervous expression, he said: "Hey, this little coffee, I see you are so nervous. The little demon has already mastered the art of Qingmu Yi Gang, let her plant it again."

Can I give you some coffee beans..."

I interrupted him and said: "Do you think I can't bear to part with this coffee? This coffee... just had fat rolled in it..."

"Holy shit!" Xiao Keming jumped up from his chair, ran to the corner of the room, picked up the trash can, and was about to vomit. He vomited for a long time without vomiting out. He was so depressed that he said with a green face: "This fat man just went away.

I went to Zhuhai to look for Little Poison to play with. When he called me, Little Poison said that this guy has not been drilling in the valley for a long time. Recently, he has returned to his original nature and misses the anus we drilled together in those years. He just got drilled all over his body a few days ago.

So cool, I actually drank this rolled coffee today..."

After hearing what he said, my face turned green. I jumped up quickly and ran to the water dispenser to wash my hands. While washing, I said: "Old Xiao, your sister, why didn't you tell me earlier? Didn't you see that I just grabbed

Are you wearing fat...?"

"Fuck, I saw it a long time ago. I was secretly having fun just now..."

As soon as I heard this, I jumped over and kept wiping my hands on the Taoist robe Xiao Keming was wearing: "Retribution, retribution is not pleasant..."

Xiao Keming just held down the little demon's head and stroked it a few times. It can be seen that his body skills at this moment have reached the state of perfection. At this moment, he is laughing and joking, not hiding. The two gentlemen are rolling around each other. If an employee from outside comes in,

I'm afraid another good story is about to spread.

After enough fuss, Lao Xiao straightened up his expression, showed a solemn look, and said: "Comrade Lin You, this matter is very important. Your detective agency is always idle anyway, how about you come with me now?"

Let’s go?”

"Okay, now that you, Lao Xiao, have spoken, of course I have no obligation to refuse. But the ugly words are ahead. If there is a ghost during the Ghost Festival, I will definitely hide behind and make soy sauce. I will never be like last time.

I was so fooled that I rushed forward and almost lost my life!"

"Yeah, you're still thinking about that incident, right? I promise, if something like this happens again, I'll ask you to get free health care for a year!"

I scolded Xiao Keming and said, "You want to drain me dry?" I punched Xiao Keming. The two of them walked out of the office room laughing.
To be continued...