"How can it be that simple?" Xiaotian said sobbing while wiping away tears.
"It is indeed difficult." Ning Youguang said, "As human beings, we have been fighting desires all our lives. We are either taming desires or being tamed by desires, so don't be anxious to give up desire all at once.
It has been tamed, but once you have the consciousness and want to be the person who tames desires, want to be the person who takes back the sovereignty of his own life and lives a free life, you have to work hard."
Xiaotian said, "I work so hard so that I can be free in the future."
Ning Youguang smiled, "Your approach to 'freedom' is driven by capitalism. In the end, apart from satisfying the consumerism they boast, you will not get the results you want at all."
Xiaotian is like a puppet being led by the strings of consumerism, but he still feels free.
"I know consumerism." Xiaotian said a little anxiously.
She understands the dangers of over-consumption better than anyone.
The countless nights when I was restless because I had no money to pay off credit cards and Huabei, the countless days and nights when I was afraid of being chased by loan sharks, like a lost dog, and needed to hide...
Would she not be aware of the uneasiness, fear, pain and suffering that excessive consumption brings to her?
But there was no way, she just couldn't control herself.
Ning Youguang saw that Xiaotian wanted to escape again.
One of her medical treatment principles is that if the client is not ready to heal and change himself, she will not force him to face his own problems and forcefully give the other party the method.
Because she knows that she can never wake up someone who is pretending to be asleep, nor can she help anyone who is unwilling to face their own problems.
She usually chooses to just click on them.
She waits for the opportunity to see when they stumble over the same problem in real life and feel pain. The pain is so unbearable that they come to her again and strongly demand her help. Only then will she give them the method.
There is no need for a whip to drive a horse fast, and no heavy hammer for a drum.
She smiled and said, "You should be very happy to be liked by many people."
"There are many people who like me." Xiaotian said reflexively.
After saying that, she couldn't help but lower her head.
Recently, she was exposed because of her true identity, and the backlash was severe. Those who originally liked her no longer like her.
“I have a strategy that can help you ‘cleanse your name’, do you want to hear it?”
Xiaotian raised his head happily, "Yes! What is it?!"
"Defeat hypocrisy with truth." Ning Youguang said with a smile, "Having others see through the disguise is a kind of failure, but tearing off the disguise yourself is a kind of victory."
"How should this be done?"
"Accept the fact that you will be liked and disliked by others, and allow yourself to be a beautiful fashion blogger or an independent woman who doesn't rely on your reputation to make a living."
"Then what should we do? Aren't all internet celebrities showing off like this?"
"But these will not make others really like you. Instead, they will make others jealous and hate you, because when you say that you are living a superior life, others will hear that you are calling them low. Not only will you be tired, but you will also make others tired.
Unhappy, because they also need a sense of presence."
Xiaotian frowned and said, "I can try to use the method you suggested to clear my name, but after that I still want to show off myself and can't help but want to buy famous brands. What should I do?"
"If you still can't help but want to show off in the future, then always tell yourself 'I am important, I am worthy of being loved, and I deserve the best!'." Ning Youguang said, "I can't help but want to buy.
For famous brands, you can try to pay off Huabei and credit cards first, and then close them. After that, you can avoid overdrafting Huabei and credit cards before considering buying expensive but unaffordable things. Instead, save money first and save enough.
Buy again.”
Ning Youguang said, "When the time comes, you will find that many of the things you desperately wanted at the time will not be wanted to buy after you save enough money."
…
After Miss Wang came back and took Xiaotian away.
Ning Youguang took out his phone and posted a message on Weibo——
[An ordinary person: persistence and desire are the same as creating a prison for oneself.]
After posting on Weibo, she quickly answered another question in the comment area——
[An ordinary person: People who are better than you basically have no time to scold you. I wish you well! @I don’t like eating apples: Teacher, how can I not care about being scolded by others?]
…
Send friends and cousin back.
The first thing Jiang Wei did when he got home was to call Ning Youguang, and the first thing he said was to apologize:
"I'm sorry, I didn't expect her cousin to have such an attitude."
"It's okay." Ning Youguang smiled, "She's not ready yet. I had a chat with her today and we'll see how she changes later."
"On the way back, my friend kept asking how her cousin was doing with her treatment, but her cousin didn't say anything," Jiang Wei added.
"Xiaotian still has a lot of knots in his heart that haven't been opened yet, and he needs to take his time." Ning Youguang said with a smile, "Please tell Miss Wang not to be too anxious. People who have not received formal training in psychology will not be able to do anything when they see others in pain."
, it is easy to want to reform them and help them out of trouble in the name of 'help' and 'for your own good', but in fact this is difficult to do."
"Okay." Jiang Wei listened carefully, "I will tell her carefully."
"When we give others, including family members, relatives and friends around us, whether we want to give them advice or help, we must respond to the opportunity to be effective. People's growth environment and education are different, and the behavioral habits they develop will be different."
Ning Youguang added, "You can tell Miss Wang that if she really wants to help Xiaotian, she must first establish trust with the other party and then guide her slowly. If she corrects her with the mentality of 'I am right and you are wrong'
Depending on the other person's behavior and habits, what the other person feels in their heart is not true love and care, but rejection and denial, which will be very hurt."
"Yeah, okay." Jiang Wei agreed, "I've really worked hard on you today."
"It's not hard." Ning Youguang smiled, "Don't think it's troublesome for me. The reason why I was willing to take Xiaotian's case was because I saw a prominent social phenomenon in her and wanted to explore it in her.
To produce something valuable to such girls in society. So, today I am not only helping Xiaotian, but also learning."
Jiang Wei couldn't help but laugh, "If you say that, I feel at ease."
Ning Youguang smiled softly and said, "Don't think too much about you. As a psychiatrist, I have seen countless weird clients. Xiaotian can only be regarded as a drizzle. He has no psychological quality at all. Psychological consultation
I can’t even think about taking over the job of being a teacher.”