“Will just sharing help him help me solve my problem?”
Xia Qi was quite skeptical. Could her problem really be solved so easily?
"Then it depends on your conversation skills with him." Ning Youguang was there.
"..." Xia Qi scratched her head, "Bao, please teach me some more."
"First describe your recent true situation to him, then describe your inner feelings, and finally mention your needs to him." Ning Youguang said, "Remember not to add any judgments or speculations of your own in the first two steps, and only tell the facts.
, the last step is to keep your focus on the point of your question when asking him about your needs. Be firm and speak clearly. Don’t use your emotions to speak. Don’t say words to my cousin-in-law that shirk responsibility and show off.
It doesn't matter whether your needs are important or not, you must firmly grasp your needs and let him respond positively."
——"You must learn to be a good husband, sister."
"Oh." Xia Qi felt that what Ning Youguang told her was enough for her to digest about how to marry a husband. "What about my mother-in-law?"
"When it comes to your mother-in-law, first clarify the boundaries between you with her." Ning Youguang said, "Before communicating with her, I suggest you find a suitable opportunity to chat with my brother-in-law and discuss together about your little home.
"Where can your mother-in-law interfere? Where can't she interfere? Wherever she can interfere, respect her opinions more. Where she can't interfere, then firmly don't let her interfere."
"We are one family after all, how can we tell them so clearly?" Xia Qi felt a little embarrassed.
Ning Youguang said calmly, "If the boundaries of your family are never clear, your family may end up not being like a family."
"Okay, I'll give it to you." Xia Qi didn't want that outcome to happen at all.
"Don't scare yourself first." Ning Youguang sighed, "Perhaps when you explain your boundaries clearly to your mother-in-law, your mother-in-law will finally be relieved?"
"Will she?" Xia Qi was very doubtful.
"Wouldn't you know it if you tried it?" Ning Youguang said, "In interpersonal relationships, learning to become better understood should be what everyone requires of themselves."
——"From the great to the simple, the principles are all very similar. Really, it all comes down to execution."
Xia Qi made a lot of complaints and got specific solutions to the problem from Ning Youguang. Finally, she felt a lot better.
Then I was in the mood to share her baby’s daily life with Ning Guan——
"I think when I hold him in my arms, I can feel his two little hands grasping my clothes tightly, and his eyes looking around. He starts to be curious about everything around him. He often sees what others are doing, and he also
He can imitate some actions. Yesterday morning, his father and I were eating sandwiches. When he saw us eating, he would reach out and grab it to eat. When he watched his father take a big bite of the sandwich, he would also open his mouth and imitate it.
Bite, it’s so cute hahahaha.”
Ning Youguang listened patiently and quietly, saying "Wow!" and "That's so fun!" from time to time, echoing Xia Qi who was eager to share.
"No matter how upset he is, as long as I hold him and gently feed him and pat his back, he will calm down. I think life is magical. I have never felt like this. No matter how tired or hard I feel, I will not hate it.
After giving birth to him, I feel that these pressures and difficulties are caused by him, but I am very grateful, grateful that he came to my side and became a wonderful child." Xia Qi said with a happy face, "I used to feel that other people's homes were
The child is very cute. But my own child is completely different from other people’s children. I can’t get tired of looking at him every day. I often can’t help but think, how did I give birth to such a cute child? I think he must be
The cutest kid in the world."
Ning Youguang clapped gently and said artificially, "You are really good at giving birth!"
But immersed in her own happy little world, Xia Qi didn't feel embarrassed at all. Instead, she nodded in agreement, "It's okay, okay, just live casually."
After finally coaxing his anxious cousin, Ning Youguang chuckled and turned off the video on his phone.
Then, she sat alone in her office for a long time.
After a detailed communication with my cousin today.
She had to think about something -
In the past, people always said, "If a person has no long-term worries, he will always have immediate worries." However, she found that the reality often turns out to be "If a person is too long-term, he will always have immediate worries."
If a person is always full of fear and worry about the future, basically this person is not living a satisfactory life at the moment and will face many problems in the future.
This is especially clear when it comes to children’s education.
If parents always use worry and fear to deal with various matters of their children and send this kind of message to their children, the result will often be what they are afraid of.
Insecurity is a kind of collective unconsciousness formed by human beings facing various uncertainties for thousands of years. In fact, it does not play much role in protecting safety, but it brings huge psychological burden to people and many life tragedies derived from it.
.
Under the current conditions where technology and materials have provided human beings with a basic sense of security, an important way to relax in life is to live in the present "without worry" or "worry-free".
If a person is relaxed every day, then his entire life is relaxed.
Therefore, when facing various life options, we need to analyze every little thing: "Am I acting based on love and longing, or am I working hard based on fear and worry?"
The two mentalities accumulate over time, creating a world of difference in life.
My cousin was not such an anxious person before, but she became more anxious after giving birth.
Could this be a far-reaching plan for the beloved son?!
Suddenly, she thought about herself. Has her wisdom really grown enough to hold the interpersonal relationships around her?
Will she one day lose all her reason and calmness because of someone?!
she does not know.
…
"Yes, how about the team building activities of Wangyue Company?" While Ning Youguang was meditating alone, Xia Qi called again via video chat.
"Is your reflex arc a bit too long?" Ning Youguang sighed.
They chatted for so long that my cousin only remembered to care about her after she hung up the video.
"I'm sorry." Xia Qi also felt quite embarrassed, "Now I take care of the children every day, day and night, and work very hard. My mind is so messed up that I always forget things."
"It's okay, I understand." Ning Youguang smiled, "It's silly to be pregnant for three years."
Xia Qi wailed, "It's really hard for the mother to have a baby."
"Okay, okay, a little story every day about fear of marriage and fear of pregnancy." Ning Youguang nodded repeatedly, "If you don't get married and have children, you will stay safe!"
"Are you still afraid of getting married and having children?" Xia Qi was shocked, "You are a psychology professor who specializes in studying human nature, why are you afraid of getting married and having children?!" 1314
Thank you for your monthly support these days, little cutie. I love you all, okay.
I'm out today, so there will be less updates.
But I still hope that Little Angel will support you during the bi-monthly ticket period!!!