"I blame you! Now you are satisfied! I lost three thousand people!"
"The headlight of the car is also broken! We have to go to the repair shop tomorrow! We can't get off without a thousand yuan!"
"Huh, how can you blame me? Who told you to call me a dung beetle first?"
I immediately said: "A total of four thousand yuan! You pay me! Is it a transfer or cash!"
Shi Wuchang looked around, then whistled and said with a smile, "I have no money."
I immediately stopped the car, pulled down the handbrake with a stern face and said, "Get out of here! I won't see you off!"
"Okay, okay, then I'll leave it here. If you dare not send me back, I'll beat you to death."
I took a deep breath, resisted the urge to take out my gun and shot him, and started the car.
On the road again, the atmosphere in the car was silent,
I looked at the road ahead, and he turned to look out the window.
In short, he ignores me and I ignore him.
After a while, he smiled and said: "Okay, kid, don't be angry. I apologize to you for what happened just now. I shouldn't have scolded you for giving birth to a son without eyes."
I immediately laughed and said, "I was also at fault. I shouldn't have called you a dung beetle in the first place. I lost a few thousand yuan and it's nothing, so I just used it as a loss of money to eliminate the disaster."
I have always been very open-minded about this kind of thing of losing money to eliminate disasters, because sometimes people will always encounter such things once they have too much money. I can sum it up in four words, that is, "Money will overflow when it is full."
,
This phenomenon is unavoidable. It seems to be a natural law. Just calm down and face it calmly.
So what I care about is not the thousands of dollars at all, what I care about is his attitude of admitting his mistake.
He is obviously a top expert in the Changchun Club, but he has no expert demeanor at all, and sometimes his temper and personality are like that of a child.
"By the way, kid, when are you planning to get married? Then I can go over and have a look."
"I have no plans. It will probably take a long time. What do you want to see?"
"Let's see if the son you gave birth to has butt eyes, haha."
"Fuck you!"
"You're done, aren't you? I'm telling you! If you fucking dare to curse me! I'll drive my car into the lake right now! We'll both die together!"
"Oh, I don't dare do that! I was just joking! Don't take it seriously! I'm a landlubber who can't swim!" he said hurriedly.
I said coldly: "You may not be able to swim, but you should be able to swim with dung, because a dung beetle will never drown if it falls into a latrine! It will only die!"
"Hahaha!"
Shi Wu Chang laughed loudly. I was stunned for a second, and then laughed loudly.
I don’t know why I’m laughing, but I’m laughing to the point of tears. I haven’t laughed so heartily in a long time.
I wiped my tears and asked, "Hey, are you married? Do you have a son and a half?"
He shook his head seriously and said, "I'm not married, but I have had several girlfriends before."
"Have we had several conversations with someone like you?" I expressed disbelief.
"Don't underestimate me. When I was young, I was invincible in the world. And at that time, I was known to be chic and suave, with an extraordinary temperament. I was more beautiful than Pan An, and was loved by everyone. There were quite a few women who chased me.
.”
"That's nonsense. I don't believe it. If you dare, take off your pants and let me see your cock."
"Isn't that right, kid? What are you doing with my dick? Are you a pervert?"
I said, "I can tell if you have touched a woman just by looking at her."
"Can this thing be seen from its appearance? How?"
I shook my head: "This is a secret method. I can't tell you. Anyway, if you don't dare to let me see it, it proves that you are bragging. You have never had a girlfriend at all."
After hearing my words, Fei Wuchang's expression changed.
But he immediately forced a smile on his face and said: "Okay, okay, I admit it, but what's the point? I have never touched a woman, because I have high requirements for life partners. I think that physical contact
It is temporary, only the resonance of the soul can last forever."
I happily said: "Come on, you can't even touch the body, but you still want to touch the soul. It's sad, I feel sad for you."
"As a warrior, you are far behind the Master Yu I know. Why do you think the gun should be placed in the holster?"
"Because if the gun is not placed inside, once it is exposed to the air for a long time, it will slowly rust. In the end, it will rust to death, making it impossible to fire."
"Brother Shit, I treat you as a close friend, so I don't want to see you suffer. Otherwise, why don't you go back to the hotel tonight? I'll find a place for you. You can put some oil on your gun and take good care of it.
.”
"You kid! Come on! I'm not interested."
I thought about it and asked again: "Hey, what do you think of Liu Chuanyu?"
"How about what? What exactly do you want to say?"
I narrowed my eyes and said, "You are single, she is also single, you are a master, she is also a master, we have a lot in common, and you and her are strangers, so why don't you try to chase her?"
Shit Wuchang's expression was stunned, and he slapped me on the head with his backhand, laughing and scolding: "You kid is just trying to make fun of me! How the hell is that possible!"
I immediately said: "How come it's impossible! You haven't tried it! How do you know it's impossible! You just say whether a person is beautiful or not?"
"pretty."
"Doesn't she have a great figure?"
"Great."
"That's alright. There are more than enough people to match you. She has had many men, but that's just because of the need to practice. It's just like you need to eat shit to practice Liujia Sanzigong. You two have the same conditions and are well matched.
ah."
Seeing that he was about to open his mouth, I quickly said: "Don't be too busy to veto it. I'm not joking to make you laugh. I'm talking about this very seriously. You should also think carefully about what I said. Some people can only
Once you miss those one or two meetings, you really missed it. Once you leave Chun'an this time, the fate between you may be over."
His face suddenly became serious, as if he was thinking about something.
I opened the window and lit a cigarette, waiting for him to express his position.
In fact, I was thinking in my heart: "Even if there is only a 1% chance, it would be great if this thing really comes true. It would only be good for me, but not good. Think about it, my name is Liu Chuanyu and my sister-in-law.
If he can do both, wouldn't he become my little sister-in-law? With these two masters supporting me, I dare to go sideways in the world."
Thinking about the longer term, if Xie Qirong suddenly wants to kill me one day in the future, I will directly call Shi Wuchang and say: "Come on! Grandpa, let me kill him!"
In addition, there is the most important point!
Just now in the clinic, I noticed some clues from what Liu Chuanyu said to him.
Liu Chuanyu is arrogant. As she told me before, all men in the world are just tools. Use them if you want and throw them away if you don't want to. Until she met Shi Wuchang, an alien who directly shattered her self-confidence with her invincibility.
It can be said that she was completely conquered.
Under this change of mood, Liu Chuanyu just offered to help Shi Wuchang prepare an antidote. In this way, it is reasonable and reasonable.
Soon after I finished smoking a cigarette, I turned around and asked what I thought about it.
Shi Wu Chang looked a little embarrassed and said: "Actually, to be honest, I really admire that woman. She is very strong, the strongest among the women I have ever met. The problem is that she definitely hates me."
"Who said that? I can only say that she hated you before! The situation is different now. Think about it, if she really hated you, would she take the initiative to let you go?"
Shi Wu Chang scratched his head after hearing this and said in distress: "If I want to give it a try, what should I do? I have no experience in this area."
"Keep it simple! Be direct!"
"She is not an innocent girl who has no experience in the world. She has experienced too much and understands everything."
"You look like this."
I pinched my chin hard and imitated: "Hey! Master, I need a maid to warm my bed at night! I'm attracted to you! Come with me!"
"Is this okay?"
"It can be done! You believe me! It can definitely be done! Of course, I am just giving you a demonstration. The specific operation depends on your on-the-spot performance."
"Another point is that you must change your image. No woman will like a sloppy man with bad breath."
"Tomorrow morning I will go to the hotel to find you and take you to have your teeth cleaned, change your clothes, and look more fashionable."
"This is the first step to change. The second step is also the most important change. You must not eat shit anymore. You must quit shit!"
"Look how clean Liu Chuanyu is. Although he is not young, his body is white and tender. Looking at you, do you think about how to kiss someone? There is a high probability that when you open your mouth and approach, the person will directly kiss you.
Vomited!"
After hearing what I said, he slapped his forehead and said with a painful look on his face: "You don't understand, it's too difficult. I can't quit. Even if I quit for a while, I'll probably start eating again in the future."
"Why can't I quit? I don't understand. Is this more uncomfortable than quitting smoking and drug addiction?"
He nodded.
I took a deep breath, thought for a while and said: "If you don't quit this thing, then I can say with 100% certainty that no woman in the world is willing to be with you. I think you are psychologically addicted. There is a high probability that you are addicted."
It's a mental illness. I'll take the time to take you to see a psychiatrist."
I know a psychiatrist in Chun'an, the one from Xia Shuishui's family. I have personally experienced his hypnosis, and it is indeed very powerful. I wonder if he can cure the problem of impermanence.
The next day, noon.
I took Fei Wuchang to buy some clothes, get a haircut and make him look younger, and then drove him to have his teeth cleaned.
When we met, the dentist smiled and said, open your mouth and let me take a look to see if the dental calculus is serious.
Shi Wu Chang obeyed and did as he was told.
The dentist took a photo with his flashlight and immediately lost his smile and told us to hire someone else.
I said good things to them, but they still didn't want to do the job. Finally, I got so angry that I asked if I could do it for a thousand yuan! The other party thought about it and agreed.
I won’t mention the process of teeth cleaning, but I will tell you one thing.
What he drank was water and what he spit out was coke.
After washing it, I took a look, frowned and asked, "Doctor, how did you do this? Why is it so ugly, and the gap between the teeth is too big."
The dentist wiped his sweat and said, "This is a normal phenomenon. Because the stones and dirt have been removed, the gap between the teeth naturally looks bigger."
At this moment, Fei Wuchang was grinning in front of the mirror. Judging from his expression, he seemed to be very satisfied with his new look.