158. It's a pity I haven't said it yet [Subkey Version]
The word despair, for the first time in twenty-four years, circulated in my mind, traveling from blood to bone marrow, from day to night, making me not want to wake up.
On this day, it rained heavily.
The heavy rain fell from the top of my head and crossed my cheeks, feeling cold and gloomy.
It was obviously the summer solstice, but when the rain fell, it was bitingly cold.
I raised my head and looked at the dark night. The clutches of despair were hovering above my head. I struggled, and the rain crossed my eyes, making my vision blurry. I raised my head and watched her and his footsteps walking further and further.
As I got further away, I raised my hand and punched the ground hard, it hurt.
Facts tell me that this is not a dream. In my most desperate moments, the three words Chen Xiaojia were all my spiritual food. I was able to solve everything in front of me calmly and indifferently without illegal means only because of her silent company.
Darkness itself is not scary, but the light in the darkness is scary at the moment it is taken away.
I don't believe it, but she left anyway. I hate that she didn't stay. I hate why she didn't want to give me a little more time.
But people's reason is still controlled by emotions. My reason tells me not to struggle or get entangled. In fact, emotionally, I can't control it at all.
After sitting there for a long time, all the clothes on my body were already soaked. I took a deep breath, raised my head, shook off the rain on my face, looked at the place where she left unwillingly, and rushed to the garage without hesitation.
.
Chen Xiaojia, I won't let you go.
I don't even believe that you are the kind of woman who is greedy for money.
Although you don't know me, I have known you for much longer than you know. I know you just like I know every cell boiling in my blood, so you have your own reasons.
It doesn't matter if you don't want to say it, but I won't let you go.
Thinking of Sun Yiqing and her together, all my rationality collapsed. I told myself, no, absolutely not.
After starting the car, I didn't have time to think too much. I only had one idea now, to get her back. I wanted to get her back.
So many difficulties have been overcome, the darkest moment has passed, and it is even more impossible for me to let go.
The rain was getting heavier and heavier. When I walked out of the gate of the community, it was dark in front of me. She was nowhere to be seen on the wet road and under the shining street lights. I stepped on the brakes and drove forward while going to get my phone.
Call Chen Xiaojia.
The call was able to get through, but unfortunately, no one answered.
I threw the phone aside impatiently, looked at the intersection in front of me, gritted my teeth, and drove over.
I didn't know whether they would choose the left or the right, so based on my intuition, I drove to the left. The rainwater on my forehead flowed down my face. I stretched out one hand to wipe the rainwater from my face, and held the steering wheel with the other hand.
Seconds later, there was a "bang" sound, and my body leaned forward uncontrollably. The smell of blood reached the tip of my nose, and then I fainted.
Now, lying on the hospital bed, looking at the white snow above my head, smelling the strong smell of anti-inflammatory water on the tip of my nose, feeling both physical and mental torture, I still dialed her number.
Zheng Kai said that she did not go to the company and was missing.
I sighed, even though the dull pain coming from my head was less than half of the pain in my heart.
The ward door was pushed open, and my mother walked towards me with a smile on her face. It could be seen from the smile on her face that the matter had been resolved. However, I still wanted to see Chen Xiaojia.
I told my mother this idea, and she said calmly: "It's not that I don't like her, but now, if you go to find her, she may not be willing to be with you."
"impossible."
My mother took out a document from her handbag, handed it to me, and said: "This is the relevant information about Sun Yiqing, Zijian. It's not that my mother thinks her son is a dwarf. Whenever, you are the best in my heart."
Yes, but if my mother thinks so, it doesn’t mean that other women think so too. Miss Chen’s choice cannot be said to be wrong, but it is also..."
At the end of her speech, she let out a long sigh and said no more.
The information contains detailed background information about Sun Yiqing, as well as recent photos of Sun Yiqing and her, in which he is holding her, very intimate.
I suddenly thought of her yelling at me at the top of her lungs on a rainy night. I didn't want to believe it, but my heart hurt so much.
After staying in the hospital for more than a day, I flipped through the recent photos of her and him again and again. She finally had a smile on her face, but it made me even more disappointed.
The next day, Liu Shihan came to take me back. It was said that all the elders in the family had arrived.
On the way, Liu Shihan revealed information about her to me intentionally or unintentionally, and told me that I could go find her.
Liu Shihan was able to help the Gao family during their most difficult time. I knew it was partly related to the interests of the family, but at this moment, she asked me to go to Chen Xiaojia, which surprised me.
To be more precise, this point impressed me.
But I don’t know how. I just hate myself for not working hard to improve my abilities, and I hate myself for losing to another man.
The meaning of mother and Liu Shihan is very simple: Chen Xiaojia loves money, not me.
But this is all bullshit. I don’t believe it, but I don’t dare to go find her.
At the family dinner, my uncle mentioned Sun Yiqing intentionally or unintentionally, and also mentioned her. I put down my chopsticks and went directly to the balcony, feeling even more disgusted in my heart.
Aunt Xia brought me a glass of red wine, said a few words, and left.
I know what she means. The Gao family has a great business, not to mention that it is dependent on the Liu family, but at this stage, the fact is that it is indeed the case.
I suppressed the longing in my heart, and silently told myself that I would wait a few days for the third uncle's matter to be settled, and then go find her.
I don't want to believe what everyone says, I just want to hear her calmly say something to me.
This incident has almost wiped out the Gao family, and I can only swallow the love between my children and my children deep in my heart. She is with Sun Yiqing, so I am not worried about her, I am more worried about Sun Yiqing.
I calculated the time and found that I would be able to find her in a week at the earliest.
What I didn't expect was that she actually came to see me. It was the time when Liu Shihan and I were formally meeting our parents. On one side were my third uncle and my father, and on the other side was Chen Xiaojia.
I made the cruelest decision.
Liu Shihan alone cannot change the interests of the entire Liu family. Her cousin must be involved in this, and the relationship between Shi Lei and Xiao Jia is also there. The three of them join forces, and on the surface, maybe they are just a few juniors.
It was an emotional dispute, but in fact, 80% of the Liu family came to support it, just because it touched on the specific interests of the city.
My father has always wanted me to train in the army, but I have never agreed. From the time I was fifteen years old to the present, he has not forced me, but I have failed him. After the incident between him and his third uncle, the affairs of the Gao family became even more difficult for him.
, if you are not careful, you will never be able to turn around again.
I have failed him once and cannot fail him again.
Only by letting Liu Shihan wholeheartedly believe in me, the Liu family, can we take things lightly.
And I had no chance to say these words to Chen Xiaojia.
I didn't stay at night, I drove back to our little home. I took out the group photo from the shoe cabinet, and my eyes were a little moist.
The love that was carefully prepared and deepest in my heart was still not expressed in the end.
In the photo, she had a ponytail, light pimples, a faint smile, and a pair of eyes staring at another man. At that time, what I longed for most was for her to look at me one more time.
That summer, she was so panicked that she broke into my heart.
At the beginning of every university, there will be various social activities, and every class will hold various social events. To put it bluntly, it is a group of people eating, drinking, and having fun together. In my opinion, it is very boring.
Roommate Shi Lei is a taciturn boy, wearing a pair of canvas shoes and a white shirt. He couldn't hold back a word for a long time and was so bored.
But the admission score was a full thirty points higher than me, the second place student.
I was young and energetic, so I felt a little unconvinced. Apart from his scores, I hardly noticed that he was better than me in any aspect. He was 1.79 meters tall, and I was two centimeters taller than him. He had good facial features.
Tough, I can be considered a pretty boy after all. As for the size of a certain position, I also looked at it when I was taking a shower. I am not at the same starting point.
But unfortunately, he became the monitor of our class.
He slept on the bunk below me, and there was nothing else on the table except a lamp and a book.
Of course, I absolutely have the right to doubt that if I ask him about Durex Okamoto or The Sixth Sense, he will definitely not know.
I am not convinced that he is the squad leader.
But not being the monitor has its advantages. For example, I can invite the female students in my class to the basketball court and shoot a few three-pointers, which will make me popular.
We are brothers, and at the same time, I am deeply aware that we are also secretly competing with each other.
He is a nerd and has a dull face. Apart from running to the department chairperson's office every day, I haven't discovered his advantages for the time being.
As for me, I completely disdain to go to the office with the old man wearing reading glasses. If I have this time, I would rather go to the dance club and art troupe. Maybe I can meet some top performers.
As for the class dinner tonight, I still have to go there because of a class monitor’s face.
I arrived very late. I can’t say it was intentional. After all, the repressive life of three years in high school caused boys and girls to have hormonal imbalances. When they get to college, the first priority is of course to move closer to this aspect. I heard that tonight’s dinner party is outside the school gate.
As soon as I entered Sichuan Restaurant, I heard a commotion inside.
Let's put it this way, I feel that with a paralyzed face, it is absolutely impossible to create such a warm atmosphere. As for who did such a good thing, I am not interested.
Come here to show off, and when you go out, you can accompany a few girls to the playground.
Looking up, everyone seemed to be having a good time. There was a table on the left and a table on the right. The atmosphere was really good. A few brothers sitting in front of the door saw me, walked over directly, and pulled me inside.
After taking a step forward, I saw several men fistfighting with a girl. The girl had a ponytail and was agile in her movements. There was a half-drunk beer bottle in front of her.
My first impression was that this woman is really tough.
Then, she lost the punch.
"No, this time doesn't count. My brain cells suddenly short-circuited. It's temporary amnesia. Do it again, do it again!" The woman's voice was loud and cheerful.
However, punching can be related to brain cells. She is quite funny. According to me, when punching fails, firstly, the cerebellum is not developed enough and the reaction is slow. Secondly, the brain rotation efficiency is too low. Thirdly, of course
Too bad luck, I didn't step on dog poop.
"No, it doesn't count this time. I just calculated on my fingers that if anyone makes me drink this beer, not only will I wet the bed tonight, but I may not be able to get an erection!"
Before I could step forward, a certain woman's voice came over me again. I felt a chill under my pants and almost couldn't relax.
Using her younger brother as a blackmail is quite interesting for this woman.
"Monitor, you're here," another classmate said with a smile and a depressed look on his face, "You have to make the decision for us today!"
The steps that I originally raised suddenly stepped back. I looked at his paralyzed face with interest. I wanted to see how he could solve this problem.
The key point is that the emotional intelligence of the paralyzed face is probably only for being fooled. With this kind of mentality of watching a joke, I sat at another table with a few people and continued to watch the show.
"Squad leader, don't listen to their nonsense. You don't know who I am, Chen Xiaojia. Have you heard of Chen Sheng? He is a hero who carried the banner to carry out the peasant uprising. Even if you don't believe me, you should believe my ancestors!"
A certain woman patted her chest to confirm, with her ponytail still dangling. Unfortunately, from my position, I couldn't see her face.
After these remarks, it was obvious that he was posing a problem for Mian Pilei. He looked up and Mian Pilei glanced at a certain woman calmly, opened his mouth and said, "We've almost finished playing today. Let's get ready and go sing."
.”
The man with facial paralysis wanted to step down for a certain girl. They all said that good men don't fight with girls. The squad leader had already spoken, and it was hard for others to refute. Originally, the matter should have ended here, but unexpectedly, a certain girl suddenly snatched the bottle, and the sound
He said loudly: "Monitor, I've never been a drunkard. We can go sing, but I have to drink this bottle first."
A certain woman's voice has exposed the information that she is drunk. For me, who is experienced, I can completely explain it just by listening to it. But other people don't know it, and they may not know it clearly.
Everyone's eyes seemed to be focused on the paralyzed man and a certain girl. Some people were even making noises nearby. The man with paralyzed face didn't drink. He didn't drink at all during the first dinner party in the dormitory. If he drank this bottle,
Go down...
Then there really is something good to watch.
I crossed my legs and looked at the facial paralysis man and a certain girl. The certain girl was pretty tall, had a ponytail, and a waist. She was wearing a white T-shirt and denim cropped pants. At this moment, she raised her head and looked at the facial paralysis man with her chin raised slightly.
I'm curious about her face at this moment.
Perhaps, she has a pair of big eyes, looking innocently at the paralyzed man.
"Xiaojia, you drank so much today, forget it!" someone said.
"I've lost three times in rowing, so I'll have to figure it out myself."
A certain woman's ponytail swayed again and said: "I told you...I never refuse to drink. This...I must drink!"
Shake your head, stupid woman.
"good!"
"As expected of Chen Sheng's descendants!"
My classmates all love to be lively. A certain girl just said one sentence, and I heard several echoes.
The paralyzed man glanced at a certain woman with a calm expression, suddenly raised his arm, snatched the wine bottle from her hand, and drank it with a slurp.
The good thing of a hero saving a beauty was taken away by a paralyzed man. Perhaps this is the main reason why I took so many detours.
By the way, a certain girl's name is Chen Yujia. My old man gave me a low-key name, while Chen Xiaojia's old man gave her a dirty name.
So far, I haven't seen the real face of this filthy woman.
I originally thought that with his paralyzed face, he would drink and cause trouble, but in the end, he became the first man in our dormitory to be cared for by the girls.
Men are human beings after all, and they have vanity and comparison. Although his face was paralyzed and he drank a bottle of beer and vomited, Chen Xiaojia chased him to the dormitory and wiped his face.
Of course, I don’t know how Chen Xiaojia persuaded the conciliatory aunt downstairs, but entering the boys’ dormitory was a very honorable thing.
Now, in addition to those 30 minutes, a woman came into our dormitory to take care of the paralyzed man before me.
When I went to bed at night, there were five people in the dormitory except me, and there were actually four men talking about Chen Xiaojia, Chen Xiaojia, Chen Xiaojia, I didn't even see a face, what were they talking about?
The most important thing is that someone actually used the word pistachio to describe her, and said she was a pistachio like a diamond.
I'm a little disdainful, but very curious, what does she look like?
The answer to this question is that a week later, on the second floor of the stadium, I had a meal with a certain man from a certain department on a certain day of a certain year and a certain month. Today, this man was trapped in the gymnasium by several people. The phone call said that it was a group fight.
Originally I didn't want to get involved in this kind of thing, but I couldn't explain the matter of face in one sentence or two, so I simply put on my coat and clothes and ran over.
The scene was a bit chaotic, four against one, and the fight was very brutal.
There are two doors in the stadium. I am at one end, and another strong figure rushes out from the other end. This person is holding a mop and is very fast. He rushes forward and pulls four men lying on the ground.
The one who separated.
"Hey, I thought I was calling for help, but I actually found a woman to come over?"
"What? Four against one? What kind of man are you?"
This voice sounds a bit familiar.
"Little girl, you need to learn a little in Finance University not to meddle in other people's business."
"You look like Doudou." A certain woman said out of nowhere, "I'm not saying you are humorous, but you are ugly."
"you!"
My curiosity became more and more serious. I took a step forward and was stunned.
Four years later, I can still remember the day when she was wearing a T-shirt, jeans, pink 361 sneakers, thick eyebrows and big eyes, and started a verbal battle with four men with a look of disdain. She was very special.
It's a pity that I haven't had time to tell her about these things in the past.