It’s strange, everyone knows that I am a good person and a good law-abiding citizen, so why is the police officer in front of me still bothering me.”
"As a law-abiding resident of Sulfur Mountain City, I pay my taxes on time, work enthusiastically, am a good employee in my work department, and a good neighbor and partner in the community. You see, I am still a good person who loves pets. With this medal, my Bao is still
Community Pet Star Contest Champion!”
The medals and ribbons as evidence are hung on the wall nearby, with the words "Winner of the 7th Sulfur Mountain City Pet Competition" and "I wish our strong and lovely Po always healthy" written on them.
And Bao, who had gained glory for me, was enjoying his dinner under the wall,
Unfortunately, no matter how I explained, the Dark Elf City Sheriff just stared at me without saying a word, as if he thought I was lying.
"Pet? Po? You said it was that scary monster. He was one of the reasons why you were complained! The Luofu family accused your pet of attacking their son!"
Under the certificate of merit in the corner, the slandered Po was drooling and licking his bones. When he saw his master looking at him, he was drooling and giggling. It was so cute.
Luo Fu? Who is it? There is really no memory.
Before I hesitated to use reconnaissance spells to review my increasingly poor memory, the Dark Elf Sheriff seemed to see my confusion, and sneered.
"......Don't you think this is very unconvincing? The monster you raised still has his son's tibia in his mouth."
"Oh? Oh! It turns out to be the Skeleton Soldiers' family on the street. Their family especially likes to play with Po. They are really good people."
I quickly floated over and pulled out the bone from Abao's mouth, which was clinging to his shin. I had no choice but to raise my fist and hit this stupid dog on the head.
"Let go, let go, you idiot. If you don't want to be sent to the quarantine center, just let me go."
He is such a good and obedient dog. Seeing my persistence, the lovely Bao sobbed and gave up his baby with a heart-wrenching expression.
"Don't worry, Abao, after I get rid of this stinky bitch in front of me, I will let the Luofu family play with you for a whole year." I promised in a low voice.
This tibia was caught as evidence of a crime, and it was really hard to argue. I forced a smile on my face, tried my best to please the sheriff in front of me, and smiled flatteringly.
"Misunderstandings are all misunderstandings. Po is just too enthusiastic. He always likes to make new friends and is always reluctant to leave when we say goodbye. Isn't it normal to take some souvenirs from friends?"
I tried to pass the bones over, but the sheriff jerked back.
"Don't come over. Keep a safe distance. Who knows what evil spell you have cast inside. My colleagues are still outside. If I can't go back, do you plan to face the wrath of the entire city's public security management force (urban management)?
.”
I've been humbled enough, but this little girl didn't show any respect. I kindly handed over the tibia, but she actually took two steps back as if she saw something disgusting, and put on a guarded fish face.
"I am the police officer representing the city. Do you know the consequences of attacking the police?"
"Misunderstanding, misunderstanding, I'm such a good person." I secretly sighed at the sensitivity and vigilance of the dark elves to magic. I had no choice but to quietly dissipate the hypnotic spell and snake curse in my shins, letting the vicious magic dissipate silently.
"I don't care if you are a good person or not. According to the Sulfur Mountain City Public Security Management Regulations, the compensation of 50 gold coins and the on-site apology must be completed within three days."
That bitch dropped the harsh words, took back the shin bone, and actually turned around and left.
"If you don't want me to come to your door again, remember to report to the urban management brigade within three days!"
After closing the door, my face looked bad.
"You bitches, be careful if you get slapped and sold to the slave market that day. In this dungeon world, dark elves have always been the best-selling and most valuable commodity."
The psychologically vicious curse was not spoken out, because once spoken, if that bitch was really sold, I would become the first suspect, and I would not be so stupid.
"Sister, you are amazing. You dare to enforce the law with such a terrifying monster. As soon as I saw him, I was scared to death."
"Huh, Amin, these guys are actually the same. Strong on the outside but hard on the inside. As a glorious city administrator of Sulfur Mountain City, you have to know..."
Not far away, the conversation between two dark elves was still heard.
"Tch, how dare you look down on me? If I hadn't changed my mind and decided to be a good person, you would have been sold to a brothel tonight."
Seeing that his owner was a little frustrated, the cute Po came over and touched my face with his huge tongue with a stinger.
"Okay, okay, Po, remember you are a noble Chromaggus, not a stupid domestic dog that just drools everywhere. Let's go to the Luofu family to apologize and have dinner by the way.
.Well, let’s have a ‘dinner’.”
When this stupid dog heard that there was something to eat in the evening, both of its heads drooled at the same time. It became more and more happy to hug me and lick it desperately.
Dogs are indeed good companions of humans, especially the two-headed hellhounds. However, the feed fee is a bit expensive. Well, the magic bones are the best food for them. But with the enthusiastic support of the Luofu family, it can probably be done.
Saved a month of feed expenses.
By the way, I forgot to introduce myself. I, Roland Lan, am three hundred and seventy-six years old this year. I am a good person, oh, no, to be precise, I am a good lich.
－－－－－－－－－－－－－
If you were to ask the world what they think of Lich, I'm afraid there wouldn't be much praise.
"The heinous villain." "The ultimate existence of the undead and dark magic." "The nightmare of the living and the king of the undead."
Although I have always regarded it as the envy of the mediocre and the frame-up of hypocrites, it cannot be denied that sometimes, the discrimination of these prejudicers does bring a lot of trouble.
At least, even in Brimstone City where internal fighting is prohibited, every month I have to deal with a few "brave people who form groups to fight evil" or "adventurers who create original evil houses."
Although most of the time they can't even break through the protective circle of this old house, there are times when I still welcome their arrival, such as when there is a lack of experimental products, such as now...
"...I must...kill you...Don't touch anywhere! Damn Tentacle Demon!...Not even here!! My parts are very sensitive. Ha...ha...don't...please"
Come on, kill me, kill me! If you have the guts, kill me."
The half-elf ranger in front of me, who was desperate for life and death, had been vociferously threatening to kill me, the villain, on behalf of heaven last week, but now, he could only slump in the filthy dungeon and die.
"Let me go, at least... kill me... don't do it!!" The accumulation of many times finally reached the top. After a fierce orgasm, when she reached a certain point, her whole body tensed up. The next second,
The whole body collapsed helplessly.
Those eyes that were originally full of hatred, even though they had lost their focus, still instinctively stared at me. It took a long time for those lifeless eyes to be filled with hatred again.
"Hey, don't look at me like that. Excessive excitement is bad for your health."
"Asshole!! Asshole!! Asshole!!"
"...There are too few curse words in the Elvish language, or your language teacher died too early. The same words are not enough to excite me."
"Scoundrel, bastard..." Several days of imprisonment and torture have worn down the will of the female ranger, but the high elf's head and her pride have not been erased. Even if she consumes too much physical strength, the blond woman's experience is still the same.
Cursing me while talking to myself.
"Okay, enough rest, let's come back to the next round!"
"Ta!" With a snap of the fingers, countless black tentacles moved again. These familiars summoned by the Pink Book could no longer suppress their desire to be close to women.
"No!!!... Please, let me go!!"
But unfortunately, how could my familiar listen to the prisoner's plea for mercy?
"I'm ticklish!!"
Yes, it's just scratching an itch. I'm a good person, and I won't do anything that is destined to be harmonized.
"It's up to you, tentacles. Focus on the ticklish flesh around her waist and neck! That's her weakness!"
"Haha...hehehe...kill me, you bastard!!...haha"
It was indeed the punishment that the female ranger feared most. Soon, under the countless tentacles, she was rolling on the ground laughing.
"Hmph! You deserve it. You actually broke into my home without permission. This is an obvious criminal act. If I don't take care of you, you will think I am a soft persimmon!"
Of course, I won't say things that are harmful to others. How could I waste my magic power just to punish her?
"Please, I admit defeat, I surrender...I will agree to any conditions!!"
"No need, you are doing me a great service by hanging around like this and feeling uncomfortable."
Looking at the slowly growing numbers on my dashboard, I couldn't help but sigh.
"Hey, it's been three days, and I've only given 2 evil points. I have to wait until that year to get the 100,000 points needed to resurrect my body."
Thinking of the happy sexual life that everyone longed for in the story, he looked down at his body with only bones left. Soon, his eyes turned to the unlucky people in the cell.
"Punishing evil is also promoting good, for the sake of points... No, for justice, for our sexual happiness... No, for becoming a good person. Your suffering is my wealth, accept your fate!
In each cage, there are various prisoners, including tauren, elves, and most of them humans.
"Let me out!!" "I'm not guilty!" "Don't come here!!" Wails and pleas for mercy kept coming, but the Lich ignored them. If he screamed too hard, the skeleton soldiers who were the guards would be cruel.
Give them a hard whip to shut them up.
"Ruhr, a human being, a criminal. He committed six crimes and was arrested three times. However, because he had a good brother who was a gangster in the dock area, the victims were threatened and did not dare to report the crime. As a result, the Supreme Court of Sulfur City twice dismissed the case because of insufficient evidence.
freed."
But at this moment, the young gangster screamed the most.
"You like mating so much, I will let you mate as much as you want."
So, I found a few ogres that were over three meters tall and played with them every day... However, they were male, and they were thicker than human calves...
Okay, it's so miserable in his cage right now that I feel sick talking about it, so let's talk about his neighbors.
"Dia Jin, a professional liar from the goblin tribe, has been accused of dozens of cases at the same time, but his methods are very sophisticated. The victims often lack decisive evidence. This guy is also willing to spend money to afford the best lawyer in Sulfur City. Therefore, so far,
Still at large."
At this time, the gambler was betting with bloodshot eyes.
"I...I won!! All your money is mine, you have to let me go as promised!! I am the four K!!"
The undead player on the opposite side smiled. He showed his trump card, four aces, which was just a little higher than the opponent's.
"No, no, no, it's impossible! You have won 767 games in a row! You cheated!!"
"Cheating without being caught is justifiable. Isn't this your famous saying? Well, tell me your last hidden property and secret!"
"I...I, I must turn over next time!!"
Of course the undead player is cheating. This is a magic card that I specially enchanted. He can get the one he wants, so how did Dia win?
And if an ordinary person loses hundreds of games in a row, he would be discouraged long ago, but Dia, a gambler who has long been red-eyed by losses, sees the opportunity to gain freedom and wealth in front of him, how can he let it go.
The undead player does not need to persuade Dia to fall into the trap. He only needs to play cards on his own. The goblin gambler's greed from the bones will make Dia, who is idle in the cage, get involved.
"What if...what if I can win, I can get my money back."
As a result, this man was just like the victims he deceived in the past. He was led into the bottomless abyss by greed and had lost all his possessions.
In fact, I have no interest in his deceptions and secrets, but every time he loses, the unwillingness and anger from the bottom of his heart will give me more evil points, while the numb guy next door becomes more and more evil.
Come less and less.
This is a prison, my personal prison. Most of the prisoners here are bastards who for some reason cannot be punished by the officials of Sulfur City, but whose crimes are indeed unpardonable.
My unreliable system can gain strength from the pain and misfortune of others, but in order to be a good person, I have no choice but to choose the path of eliminating evil and promoting good.
So, through some connections, I brought these bastards here as food for my 'evil lich system'.
The brave man who "entered hell alone" received the best treatment. Anyway, she only broke a few vases, scattered a few skeleton gardeners, entertained her for a few days, and then threw them out.
The others are all bastards worthy of the death penalty, so I let them enjoy what they have done to others, or in other words, those who reap the consequences.
For example, let criminals taste what it feels like to be kidnapped, let cheaters taste what it feels like to be deceived and lose everything, let robbers and thieves taste what it feels like to be robbed and steal everything, and let malicious hoarders create famine.
The profiteers enjoy sleeping on top of a golden mountain but cannot buy a piece of bread.
"Madman!! You madman!"
"Please, let me go!"
It is so pointless to do things that harm others and not benefit oneself. Their pain will be turned into my strength through the nameless system and the cornerstone of my resurrection.
"I'm not crazy, you are crazy!"
"Crazy Lich!! Please let me go, I'm willing to do anything!"
Crazy Lich? Indeed, many people said that I had gone crazy a long time ago, but it was that person who said it first.
I stroked my chin with my finger bones and recalled it carefully.
"When did I start going crazy? In my previous life, as a judge who insisted on fairness and justice, I was stripped of my official position by unscrupulous officials, and was eventually squeezed out to the point where I couldn't even work as a lawyer?"
"Did you reincarnate into this world with that strange system, thinking that you were the protagonist of destiny, vowing to make the people and your loved ones live a happier life, but you found that the cruel fate was irreversible, and you lost your country, family and all your loved ones step by step?"
"I swore revenge on the gods and hypocrites, and used my mutilated bodies to form an army of the dead. However, I found that on the way to revenge, there were already corpses and ruins behind me. I had already fought with hypocrites and careerists.
When we continue to create disasters and tragedies under high-sounding banners?”
"Haha, maybe, from the beginning, I, who had the memory of two lives, have already gone crazy after discovering the truth of the world."
